‘What?’ I almost shouted this at him, which made him take a step back. ‘You live, what, within a couple of miles of Portobello and you’ve never been to the beach?’
‘We’ve been to Portobello loads; the girls cycle up and down the promenade.’
‘When it’s nice and sunny and dry.’
‘Yeah, mostly.’
‘But not on the sand, no paddling and getting all muddy, sand in their hair, seaweed on their legs, wet knickers and leggings from falling over.’
He shook his head.
‘Oh, Nathan, what a shame.’ I genuinely felt sorry for all of them, bless.
The girls coming into the kitchen saved him further pity. They’d attached a small belt to the lapel of Daisy’s top and she crawled along on all fours, meowing. Chloe had the Minion under her arm slightly muffling the ‘Wayhay’.
‘Bella’s thirsty,’ announced Chloe.
I laughed. ‘And what would Bella like to drink? Some milk for the pussycat?’
Daisy/Bella shook her head. ‘Apple juice,’ she mewed.
I got a plastic cup from the cupboard, but Chloe said, ‘Cats don’t drink from cups. They drink from a saucer.’
I poured some apple juice on a saucer and put it on the floor. Chloe said, ‘C’mon, pussy, come and drink your pussy juice.’
At that point I exploded with laughter, as did Nathan, and even Millie laughed though I don’t think she should have. The Minion said, ‘Wayhay.’
I left his flat just as the girls were getting tired and irritable. I didn’t want to complicate their bedtime and didn’t fancy at that stage getting involved in reading bedtime stories or whatever people did with their kids these days at night. Nathan escorted me to my car, very chivalrous of him. I still glanced around in case any would-be car thieves were lurking nearby. He awkwardly bent to kiss me as I opened the driver’s door. I started to kiss him back, happened to look up and noticed three heads peering down from his living-room window. ‘You’ve got an audience.’ I laughed as he followed my gaze. I jumped in, started the engine and drove away smiling.
That went well.
‘It’s not like you to be positive.’
I know, I must be coming down with something.
‘Well, keep it to yourself, please.’
My shift pattern meant I’d be working nights most of the rest of the week and it’d be the next weekend before we could meet up again. As much as I’d enjoyed my day with the girls, now I really wanted some alone time with Nathan.
*
After Kat had left, Nathan got his brood ready for bed, Millie being last as usual. As he got her settled she said, ‘Mummy want’s us down in London again this weekend.’
‘I know.’
‘Gran’s going to take us.’
‘I know.’
‘Can’t I stay with you?’
‘I think mummy wants you all together.’
‘It’s not fair.’
‘I know.’
Millie was silent for a moment then asked, ‘Are you going to marry Kat?’
‘Where did that idea come from?’
‘Inside my head.’
‘Yeah, but apart from that, I’m still married to Mummy.’
‘Not for much longer, though.’
‘How did you work that out?’
She shrugged and yawned. ‘Well, she’s with Oodles now and you’re kissing Kat. These things happen.’
‘You’re too grown up.’
‘Someone has to be around here.’
Nathan laughed. ‘I’ve just met Kat.’
‘But you like her.’
‘I do.’
‘We like her too. She’s funny and naughty.’
‘She is, but it’s complicated, Millie, and there’s a lot going on just now.’
‘I know.’ She was quiet for a moment then asked, ‘You still really like cinnamon and raisin bagels, don’t you?’
‘I do.’
‘If you only had one left, would you give it to Kat if she wanted it?’
‘Yeah.’
‘You’ve got it bad.’
Nathan laughed, ruffled his daughter’s hair, kissed her goodnight and said, ‘You’re too smart for your own good at times.’
Chapter 18
Early, the following Saturday morning, Nathan’s phone buzzed and the words ‘Laura’s home phone’ flashed up in green. He answered quickly.
‘Hi, Nathan.’
‘Laura, what’s happening? Is everyone all right?’
‘Everything’s fine. I just phoned to let you know that we’re having a really nice time.
Nathan’s antenna was twitching. She wouldn’t phone just to tell him that, but he played along to see what happened next. ‘Listen, Nathan, the girls won’t be home tomorrow.’
Here we go, he thought. ‘Why not?’
‘There’s much more room for them here, now that I’m in a bigger flat.’
‘Yeah, Laura, whatever, that’s nice for you, but what about the girls? They’ve got school on Monday.’
‘They’re not coming back, Nathan.’
‘What do you mean they’re not coming back?’
‘I thought I’d made myself very clear. They’re going to stay down here with me and go to school locally. I’ve managed to get them into a fabulous little primary school just down the road from my new flat in Brixton. I’ve agreed with the head teacher that we can start them in two weeks.’
‘Brixton used to be a war zone.’
‘It’s changed and gone upmarket now, the flat’s got a lovely little garden and—’
‘Laura, I don’t give a shit about your flat. You can’t just decide to keep the girls in London. It’s—’
‘If you’re going to become abusive, Nathan, I’ll hang up.’
‘How do you expect me to react? This is the first I’ve heard of your hare-brained scheme. What do the girls think about it?’
‘I’ve been talking to them on and off about it and they can see the benefits of going to school here.’
‘You mean you’ve poisoned their minds or bribed them or—’
‘I’m their mum, Nathan. That’s the thing you’ve got to think about.’
‘You buggered off and left them.’
‘You’re swearing again.’
‘What the fu … hell do you expect me to do?’
‘Talk like an adult, calm and measured.’
Nathan gathered his thoughts and wondered whether Laura could do this legally. He needed to be sure before he went down that road. ‘Why the change of mind, Laura? You left us behind so fast there were practically scorch marks on the carpet.’
‘That’s a bit of an exaggeration, Nathan, but I never really wanted to get away from the kids, just from you. Now I want my girls with me here, simple as that. They can have a much better life with me.’
‘You said you wanted them to stay here because they’d have a more settled life in Edinburgh.’
‘I’ve changed my mind.’
‘You can’t do that.’
‘Of course, I can, I just did.’
‘I won’t see them, Laura; this isn’t fair.’
‘Of course, you’ll see them; you can see them whenever you want. You just have to let me know in advance when you’re coming.’
‘Laura, that’s ridiculous; you want me to book an appointment to see my girls?’
‘It’s hardly like that, Nathan, just a little notice would be required, that’s all.’
‘I can’t go flying up and down to London; it’s too expensive.’
‘I did it.’
‘You chose to do it, for Christ’s sake. That’s hardly the same thing.’
‘You’re being abusive again, Nathan. I think I might need to start recording our telephone conversations.’
Nathan took a deep breath and tried to calm his temper. ‘Laura, you know this isn’t fair; especially not the way you’ve told me. You should have let me know ages ago.’
‘I only decided in the last f
ew days, Nathan. Look, I know this is difficult for you, but try and put your personal feelings to one side and you’ll realise this is the best thing for the girls. A girl needs her mother more than her father.’
‘That’s not true, Laura, and well you know it. I’ve always been there for the girls.’
‘Well, it’s my turn now, then. Also, look at how many single mothers are bringing up children; it’s almost the social norm now so that proves my point. Besides, I’ll have Simon as support. We’ve talked about getting a place together.’
‘That was quick and he’s an arse – what good’s he going to be? They’re not his daughters. He doesn’t have their best interests at heart. He only wants into your knickers.’
‘He’ll be there for moral support. He gets on great with the girls, which helps as I’m sure it can be tough being a single parent. As for my knickers, well, if you must know, when I’m with Simon I don’t wear any.’
Nathan knew the last comment had been designed to get his blood boiling but despite this he could still feel his face getting red. He decided to play the ‘legal card’ anyway. ‘I’m not happy about this, Laura, I don’t think what you’re doing is legal.’
Laura sniggered. ‘Of course, it’s legal; I’m the girls’ mother.’
‘I’m their father; don’t I have rights too?’
‘I’m going to go now. I’ll phone you in a few days, once you’ve had time to think about things a bit more and cool down. Please don’t contact us meantime; the girls need a few weeks or months to get used to the idea. I’m working long hours for the rest of this week, so I can take next week off and show them how great living in London will be.’
‘Who’s looking after them during the day, and what do you mean by months?’
‘They’re booked into a wonderful activity centre this week near Fulham Football Club. It’s really geared up for younger kids during term time, but they’ve agreed to take them for a few days. It’ll help burn up all their excess energy.
‘And allows you to have a nice quiet evening to yourself.’
‘Well, after working hard all day I deserve it, don’t you think?’
‘No, I don’t “think”, and Millie hates sport.’
‘Millie’s just spoiled.’
‘She’s not spoiled, she’s just old enough to know what’s going on.’
‘She has been a little difficult.’
‘I’m not surprised. It’s a huge disruption and all her friends are here. You never answered my question – what do you mean “months”?’
‘I said weeks or months, depending how long it takes them to settle, especially Millie. She needs to get used to the idea. They all will.’
‘You’re a complete cow, Laura.’
‘Thanks, Nathan. That makes me feel better. Bye.’
Laura hung up and Nathan’s spirit sagged, as if a heavy weight had suddenly been placed onto his back. He found it difficult to move and breathe. Laura had obviously been planning this for some time; she’d ambushed him, but he probably should have seen it coming.
The girls had only been away for a day and he missed them already. He’d planned on spending the morning preparing their clothes and uniforms ready for school and now … well, now he wouldn’t have to. He’d never do it again; months, she’d said months. He felt sick and didn’t know where to turn, then suddenly he did.
Chapter 19
Nathan didn’t say much on the phone, but I could tell something had happened, as asking me to come over seemed out of character. He’d texted me only an hour ago and he’d been lovely, we’d planned a nice evening in town with a meal and drinks and … well, I hadn’t thought too much beyond that.
Yes, you have, you liar.
‘Don’t you start.’
You had this whole fantasy in your head, back to his flat with the whole bodice-ripping thing going on.
‘I don’t own a bodice.’
You know what I mean. You were wearing one in your fantasy.
‘You shouldn’t be watching my fantasy.’
I don’t have much choice, do I?
‘You could close your eyes.’
My eyes were closed.
‘Well, you could have looked the other way.’
What and miss that? No chance.
‘I need to go.’
Don’t forget your bodice.
‘Shut up.’
I didn’t know what to expect when I cautiously parked outside his home, once again looking out for car thieves and dodgy characters, but every person wandering around at that time in the early afternoon in Dumbiedykes looked shifty to me.
I hurriedly buzzed his flat and quickly closed the door once he’d let me inside the vestibule. When I reached the top of the stairs he opened his door and stood waiting for me; his red eyes and dark expression made me think the worst. ‘What’s wrong? Has someone died?’
‘No, of course not.’
‘Right, sorry, whenever I, we …’ I didn’t want to explain my and Sid’s default situation on crisis management. ‘Never mind, what’s happened, then?’
‘Laura’s keeping the girls in London.’
‘For how long?’
‘Forever.’
We went into his uncannily tidy living room and I sat down on the couch opposite Nathan, who slumped down into a chair. I hadn’t expected that answer. ‘Can she do that?’
‘Yeah, it seems that she can.’
‘Can you not see them at all?’
Nathan snapped, ‘I don’t know, eventually, she said months.’
‘Don’t shout at me. I’m not the one taking your kids away. I’m on your side. I’m just trying to find out what’s going on. I know diddly squit about child access custody shit.’
Nathan tried to smile. ‘Sorry, Kat. It’s diddly squat, not diddly squit.’
‘You choose now to correct my grammar?’
‘I could do with a hug.’
‘You’re not very huggable right now and I’m not in the best of hugging moods but I’ll try, okay?’
I sidled over and squeezed into the armchair and pulled him into my arms. He snorted. I grimaced, but my bits still twitched even though I had in my arms a snivelling, miserable ex-corpse. I was either smitten or a raving loony. ‘Nice. It must be true love for me to be sitting here doing this. You’re a mess, Nathan.’
‘You keep saying that to me. you’ll give me a complex.’
‘I think you’re about as complex as it’s possible to get. Hayley’s right, I shouldn’t have got involved with you.’
‘I wouldn’t blame you for walking out of here and never coming back; my life is a mess.’
‘I’m a sucker for lost causes.’
‘Am I a lost cause, then?’
‘You’re the king of lost causes.’
‘At least I’m good at something.’
We were quiet for a minute or two before I thought the time had come for him to stop feeling sorry for himself. ‘So, what are you going to do?’
‘What do you mean?’
‘About your girls.’
‘I don’t know. I’ve only just found out. I haven’t really thought about it.’
‘Right, well, first let’s get out of here. You need some air to clear your head. It’s a lovely afternoon – let’s take a walk up the high street.’
‘I don’t feel like moving.’
‘That’s exactly why you should – c’mon, let’s go. I’ll phone Hayley on the way; some legal advice might be useful.’
Half an hour later I’d managed to relocate his gloom from his flat to a comfy leather chair in Starbucks. It felt as if he had one of those little cartoon rain clouds following him about. To make matters worse, it’d started to rub off on me and my spirits were falling. We were sitting at a window table watching groups of happy tourists walking by, waiting for Hayley to phone back. Nathan’s latte had grown cold and had a skin on the surface so that when he took a sip some of it was stuck to his lip, giving him a caramel moustache. I watched
him lick it quickly, as he rightly assumed it wasn’t a good look.
My phone rang. Hayley; good timing. The place was quiet, so I put her on loudspeaker. ‘Okay, Kat, I’m assuming there’s no formal agreement in place yet around custody?’
I looked over at Nathan, who shook his head.
‘There’s not,’ I said.
‘Well, then, currently, both parents have equal custody rights.’
‘What does that mean?’ Nathan asked.
‘Well, as there’s no legally certified agreement yet, there’s no restrictions on you seeing your children. The downside of that is that there’s no agreement as to when you have to see them either. So, if you like, possession is nine tenths of the law. She’s got your children and until something is agreed in writing she can manoeuvre things so that you are kept away from them, indefinitely. How was it left between you both?’
‘Not good,’ Nathan said gloomily.
‘What does “not good” mean?’ Hayley asked.
‘She said months.’
‘Months?’
‘Months.’
‘That’s quite a long time,’ Hayley said, her tinny voice resonating on the table. ‘A divorce where children and property are involved can take up to a year to resolve.’
‘A year?’ asked Nathan, his voice pitching towards hysteria.
‘Thanks, Hayley,’ I said, deciding that Nathan had heard enough.
‘Kat, call me later?’
‘Will do, bye.’
After we’d hung up I stared at Nathan, who sat with slumped shoulders in his chair. ‘What can I do?’
I felt very sorry for him. I couldn’t really empathise as I wasn’t a parent but there must be hundreds if not thousands of men across the UK (and some women) in the same or similar positions. ‘Nathan, you need to realise that she holds all the aces here. She has them in her care in her flat in London, some four hundred miles away.’
‘I know, and her boyfriend, Oodles, seems very happy with the arrangement. I’m not sure why, but he is.’
‘Okay, you could move to London, but that doesn’t guarantee you’d see them any more often than if you stay here, but at least you’d be in the same city.’
‘I don’t really want to move back to London. No matter what I do, she’s not going to let me see them, is she?’
The Second Life of Nathan Jones Page 14