by Clare Lydon
Had Kirsty seen the footage or photos? She wasn’t exactly the type to watch rubbish on the telly, but someone in her circle had probably been exposed to the lie on social media at the very least. Sandy Cove protected its own, and Kirsty fell into that category, not Saffron.
But she couldn’t go to Kirsty in her London clothes. They weren’t part of Saffron’s new life, but weighed her down like a ship’s anchor. It seemed an insult to the Sandy Cove way of life. Which was real and pure. On the flipside, everything about her life in London and LA was utter filth. How had Saffron not realised until this summer how much she hated her life at every level?
It was imperative to express this to Kirsty, but would she believe Saffron? Their last time together, they’d talked about the importance of trust. Since then, Saffron had been seen looking cosy with Echo. How many women would take Saffron’s word that nothing had happened? It had all resulted from a huge lapse in judgment on her part. Her pushy agent and manipulating Girl Racer co-star had staged the meeting just to get the hopes up of the fans the love affair had been rekindled in the nick of time for filming. Before Saffron had made her escape from Haze, the prospect of her getting back with Echo was already trending on Twitter.
Another confirmation that Pearl and Echo had planned everything, proving how neither would stop their machinations to squeeze every last drop of blood out of Saffron.
Even though Saffron hadn’t reacted the way they probably desired, it still played out perfectly for mass consumption. The are they/aren’t they debate was publicity gold for the next movie. People loved to choose a side and to argue why they were right, even if it had zero impact on their life. Actually, that component seemed to add to the fun, because no matter the result, it didn’t alter someone’s life.
Aside from Saffron’s happiness.
No one seemed to care about that, including Saffron. Until she came to Sandy Cove and met Kirsty. Then things started clicking in her head and the conclusion was Saffron hated her old life and wanted to start over before it was too late to let the real Saffron flourish.
“Better get your arse out of the car, then.” Saffron’s hands still gripped the steering wheel.
Prying her fingers off, she got out of the car, and entered the beach house, her mind flitting to the times Kirsty had been there. Kirsty exploring the main area, commenting the place lacked personality. The kiss in front of the fridge.
In the bedroom, Saffron stood at the foot of the bed, remembering how bloody fantastic it’d been to wake up with Kirsty.
Was it too much to ask the universe to have protected Kirsty from hearing a thing about what had transpired between her and Echo? Yes, because in today’s world, there were no such things as privacy for the likes of Saffron Oliver.
I can’t go to her!
Not yet at least.
Saffron needed to clear her mind and the best way to do that was to hop on her motorbike. Hurriedly, she changed into her gear, and within minutes, she zoomed away, feeling the heaviness lift.
Hunched down, she reached the open roads, taking the turns at speed, making her lean low to the ground, feeling the thrill of having a powerful machine between her legs, and knowing there was no room for a mistake. But the control excited her, along with the vrooming sound when she revved the bike.
With her mind on autopilot, it didn’t sink in until the fragrance of lavender tickled her nostrils. She’d taken the exact route with Kirsty, not even a week ago. Slowing down, she pulled over to sit on the bench where she and Kirsty had spoken about Anna. The woman who’d lied and cheated on Kirsty.
Would Kirsty think Saffron was no better?
It was true, Saffron hadn’t been entirely honest, but it wasn’t because she was purposefully lying to Kirsty, but to herself. It was hard to confess she’d fallen for Echo, who was nothing more than a con artist, and Saffron had felt foolish for needing to feel loved so she’d ignored all the signs that in hindsight flashed overhead like a neon sign.
It started off small. Echo sharing too much about their private life. Details that Saffron wanted to be just between them. Even Echo’s jealous streak, when Saffron talked to someone too long at a party. At first, that seemed kind of sexy. Echo wanted her that much. Soon enough it’d morphed into Saffron never being able to see or confide in friends, out of fear of igniting Echo’s temper. And, it wasn’t even like Echo had ever loved Saffron. No, she liked how the connection played to movie audiences. All she was to Echo was Saffron Oliver, a commodity to be guarded at all cost.
Soon enough, Saffron was hostage to Echo and her control, afraid to walk away because she didn’t want to be all alone. Just the thought of that used to send her into a frenzied panic, especially late at night, when the darkness seemed to swallow her whole.
Saffron’s phone rang.
“What?” she snapped at her publicist.
“I need to know everything about Wine Time.”
“The shop in Sandy Cove? How do you know about it?” Saffron swiped hair out of her eyes.
“Because your photo is all over their website, claiming it’s the only place to buy wine in your adopted town.”
Saffron saw black. Then streaming sunlight. More black. It took several ticks of her heart to figure out she was blinking excessively and unable to speak or comprehend what she’d just heard.
No.
This wasn’t happening again.
Being played to boost someone else’s business.
Please, God. No.
“Saff—is there something going on with the wine shop? Have you invested in it? What’s your connection?”
“I don’t have a connection!” Saffron slammed her fist into her own thigh, ignoring the spasm of pain.
“The photos are of you in the shop. Are you sure?” Andrea asked, her strained voice not trying to upset Saffron further.
Yes, she had a connection, but how to explain she’d fallen for Kirsty, who only cared about one thing. The Saffron Oliver name and photos to sell booze.
How had Saffron been such a fucking idiot to think Kirsty wanted the movie star for anything else? Her parents had never put her first. Pearl had repeatedly used her. Echo had kept her under lock and key all for publicity. Why would Kirsty be any different? When would Saffron learn she couldn’t trust anyone?
Unbridled rage hummed through Saffron, when the motorbike’s tyres screeched to a stop outside of Wine Time. She leapt off the bike and ripped her helmet off by the time she reached the shop door.
“What’s the meaning of this?” Saffron, with her helmet tucked under her left arm, held up her phone with her right hand. “All this time, you’ve been lying to me!”
Kirsty, who’d been unpacking bottles from a box, took a step back, giving Saffron the once over. “What are you raving about?”
“This!” Saffron shook her phone.
“Who do you think you are? Barging in my shop, ranting like a lunatic.” Kirsty planted her feet, readying for battle.
“Who do you think you are? This entire time, you planned on using me. I give you credit for all your showboating, claiming we couldn’t be more than client and party planner, when all the while you wanted nothing more than to get close to me.” She snarled and then hurled the words, “All to get an endorsement starring moi.”
“M-moi?” Kirsty stuttered.
“Yes, me.” Saffron stupidly thumped her phone into the centre of her own chest, hitting bone.
“Why would my website have you on it?” Kirsty knitted her eyebrows.
“Exactly! Why would it, Kirsty?” Saffron stepped towards the woman, the rage continuing to boil. “Why?”
“Can I see whatever you’re talking about?” Kirsty bared her palm.
“It’s your website. How do you not know what’s on it?”
“Can you please just show me your fucking phone?” Kirsty shook her hand.
Saffron slapped it into place. “By all means. Keep this façade going. Maybe you should be the actor, not me.”
K
irsty shot her a venomous glare before giving the phone the time of day. “What the fuck?”
“You really are good.” Saffron applauded, managing not to drop her helmet.
“Just stop, okay.” Tears brimmed in her eyes. “I haven’t seen it since Helena did the rejig. I had no part in this.” Kirsty held the phone by a corner, as if not wanting the lies to contaminate her.
“Yeah, right. After everything between us. I thought I actually meant something to you. Like you believed in me and my ability to quit my career. To be a real person, not a commodity.” Saffron willed herself not to break in front of Kirsty. When she got home she could let the tears flow.
“Oh, get off your high horse. You’re only trying to shift the blame onto me because within 48 hours of us shagging, you rekindled your relationship with Echo-Fucking-Black for all the world to see. I’ve been dumped before, but never on such a grand scale. Bravo, Hollywood. Bravo!” Kirsty clapped her hands like she was congratulating the queen herself.
“I’ve done no such thing.” Saffron took a shallow breath, feeling faint.
“What thing are you talking about?” Kirsty made sarcastic quote marks in the air.
“Rekindling things with Echo. That lunch was all a setup.”
“You led me to believe it was a business meeting. One you were legally required to attend. From what I saw, it didn’t look business-y. Not with the posh setting and romantic flickering candlelight. I’m surprised Adele wasn’t serenading you two as you held hands, staring lovingly into the other’s eyes.” Kirsty pressed her palms together, batting her eyelashes.
“At least with Echo, I know what I’m getting. You’ve been lying to me since day one.” Kirsty held a finger up in the air, but Saffron continued to steamroll. “The worst part, I actually believed you. I believed what we had was real. I’ve been such a fool!”
“Why would Pearl set you up on a date? Why should I believe a word you say?” Kirsty’s expression turned to stone.
“Can’t you see? It’s the perfect stunt to drum up publicity for the next Girl Racer.”
“It definitely worked! Even in this small town, all the tongues are wagging.”
“On more levels than you know.” Wetness formed in the corner of her eyes.
Kirsty placed a hand on her hip. “And, what’s that supposed to mean?”
“Here are the facts. You and the shop will be famous. The paparazzi are already camped outside and they’ll hound you for days, if not weeks. Wine Time will become one of the must-stops for the UK Dyke Tour. For me, the whole experience has drilled into my head that I can’t trust anyone. Not one soul.”
“That’s rich coming from the woman who said she wanted to quit the business, but her next movie will begin filming in a month. So, when will you be leaving to be with Echo every single day and night?” Kirsty wrapped her arms around herself, fixing Saffron with a death stare.
“You’re just like everyone else!” Saffron slammed her helmet into her thigh.
“Meaning?”
“No one listens to me. I don’t want to be in the next film. Or any film, but whenever I say that, the words don’t compute.” Saffron tapped a finger to the side of her head. “People, even you, just want to hear the words that fit their own script.”
Kirsty sucked in a deep breath. “You know what, I don’t have time for dyke drama. As you can see, I’m very busy.” She waved to all the boxes that needed unpacking.
“I’m glad using my name has brought the prosperity you so much desired. It must have been such a hardship spending time with me, when you clearly didn’t respect me as a human being.”
“I didn’t respect you?” Kirsty clutched the front of her shirt. “I can’t trust you!”
“Neither can I!”
“I was right all along. This. Us. It wasn’t ever going to work. Just go back to being a movie star. Jump back into bed with Echo. Leave me to cobble back the pieces of my dignity.”
Saffron gaped at the woman, swooshing her away like a pesky insect. “I can’t believe all of this has been a lie. All of it.”
Chapter 27
When the shop door slammed and Saffron was gone, along with the paparazzi, Kirsty was left all alone. She stood for a full few moments listening to the whoosh of her heart, and the familiar noises of the shop. The hum of the fridges. The creak of the polished floorboards under her weight. It took a few more moments to notice she was shaking.
She stared at her hand. The bottle of wine she held almost fell from her grasp, but she managed to put it down.
What the hell had just happened? None of it seemed real. She’d told Helena to join Hugh at the pub as the shop was quiet. Kirsty had decided to unpack a couple of boxes to take her mind off the whole Saffron debacle. She’d just about managed to convince herself there was a sliver of hope that Saffron wasn’t cheating. However, then Saffron had come in and said all those things.
Kirsty walked over to the counter and almost crumbled to the floor. She and Saffron were done. That’s all she knew. The hope and anticipation of the past few weeks were done. No more flirting. No more thrills circling her body.
She clutched the counter harder as a wave of doom crashed through her, almost taking her breath away. She grabbed her phone and pulled up the website. Anton’s new graphics looked great, but that was by the by. She clicked on the promo pages and the first one that came up was plastered with photos of Saffron. There she was, holding up wine in the shop. Standing smiling at her parents’ barbecue. Grinning beside Kirsty after she’d eaten her first oyster in years. Kirsty shook her head. No wonder Saffron was mad.
What the hell had Helena done? After everything they’d built, everything they’d done to get the shop on an even keel. All the trust they’d rebuilt over the past two years. Had Kirsty been unclear in her instructions about Saffron? She didn’t think so. But now it was too late.
The plummet of doom was now met with an uprising of anger.
How dare Helena do this to her. To them.
And how dare Saffron think Kirsty could do that to her.
It turned out Saffron had been right all along: trust nobody.
Kirsty locked up half an hour early. Outside, a light blinded her. She held up her hand to her face. What the hell was that? More paparazzi? If Kirsty and Saffron were done, this would be her last experience of it.
Anger propelled Kirsty down the High Street at record speed to The Mariner’s Arms. She crashed through the door, eyes flitting wildly. Kirsty took in the shine of the beer taps, the smile of the bartender, the crackle of laughter in the air.
But she only had eyes for Helena. She spotted her sitting near the end of the bar, tilting her head back, laughing at something Hugh said. Such a perfect couple.
They had what Kirsty would never have.
Helena had seen to that.
Kirsty thundered over to their table and stood beside it.
Hugh clocked her first, standing up to greet her. “Kirsty! Didn’t expect to see you here tonight.”
Helena jumped to her feet, a worried expression on her face. “You look like you need a drink. Hugh, go get her a wine.”
Kirsty held up a hand to stop him. “I won’t be drinking with you, tonight or any night.” Her words curdled on her tongue. She still couldn’t believe she was having to say this to Helena. “How could you do what you did? To me? To us? Maybe my mum was right all along.”
Kirsty’s raised voice made a few people nearby turn their heads.
Helena frowned, holding up a palm to Kirsty. “Slow down, what’s happened? Why are you shouting at me?”
“Like you don’t fucking know.” Venom rattled through her. “I just want to know why? You can’t bear me to be happy, is that it? All that guff about thumping Saffron if she came in the shop. I should punch you instead.”
“Please, Kirsty.” Hugh stepped between them. “No punching Helena.”
That blew the lid off Kirsty’s anger.
“This is between us, Hugh.”
/> He stepped back as Kirsty edged forward.
“Although, you should know what a Judas your wife is. Betrayal doesn’t even cover it.” She stared at Helena so she got the point. “Using Saffron’s name to promote the shop after everything I said, everything that’s happened.”
“I didn’t!” Helena’s voice scratched the air. “I would never do that to you!”
The pub hushed as Kirsty and Helena’s voices scaled the octaves.
A collective intake of breath waited for the next verbal blow.
“Nice try, but you already did. Snapping covert shots, using personal ones of us. Even from the day I ate an oyster. I didn’t think you’d stoop so low.” Every word sounded like a slap. “Saffron and I have split up, so if that was your aim, job done.” Kirsty pointed a finger as if it was loaded. “Just know that as soon as the bank opens tomorrow, I’ll be asking about a loan to buy you out of the business. I can’t work with partners I don’t trust. You fall into that category.” Kirsty shook her head, her anger still fizzing through her like a firework.
Helena was shaking her head, her eyes wide. “I didn’t do whatever it is you’re saying. There must be some mistake.”
“You’re not wrong there. My mistake was trusting you. I’ve been defending you, singing your praises to anyone who’ll listen. Fuck you, Helena.” She hoped her gaze burned her friend. Scrap that, ex-friend.
Kirsty turned and walked out of the pub, passing a few locals with open mouths.
She didn’t look back.
Chapter 28
Kirsty dragged her kayak up the stony beach, the lone person on this part of the beach at 8am. It was heavier after her ride, but she didn’t mind. She hadn’t been able to sleep, so she’d decided to commune with nature. Kayaking had been the perfect remedy for that. The smell of the sea in her lungs, the supreme tranquillity calming.
Her wetsuit clung to her body. Kirsty shivered. She needed to get into dry clothes. She abandoned the kayak at the top of the beach, then sprinted across the path and up to their hut. Within 30 minutes, she was hosed down and changed. She sat on the porch in her favourite shorts and T-shirt, coffee in hand, staring out at the beautiful vista, the lighthouse regal as always.