by Dixon, Ruby
"Thanks again," I tell her, impulsively giving her a hug, too. "I'll be back for sure."
She pats my back, chuckling. "You're sure happy today. It's good to see."
It feels good to be happy. I didn't realize how much of a dark cloud I was living under before until now. No wonder everyone gives me wary looks when I approach. I probably haven't been very fun to live with. I make a mental note to do better. I don't think it'll be hard. Not with M'tok to talk to. I like talking to him a lot more than I like fighting with him…and weirdly enough, I already miss him. I'm looking forward to his return to camp tonight. I'm looking forward to just seeing his smile.
Well, and kisses, and cuddles, and him fussing over me. The way he touches my hair and squeezes my too-big butt like it's the best thing he's ever seen. Just being around him makes me…happy. I like being happy.
I head out of Brooke's hut and don't quite know what to do with myself. Everywhere I look, people are busy. The moms with small children—Harlow, Liz, Angie, Gail—are sitting by the fire and talking. A few of the single girls are down on the beach, watching some of the Shadow Cat clan fish. Farther down on the shore, Devi and her mate N'dek are picking at something, and I can see his tail curled around her leg from here, as if he wants to hold onto her. It's sweet. Off to one side, Lauren and Hannah are talking with their mates, gesturing at an empty space near the huts, and I wonder if they've had enough of the tents that they currently live in and have opted for something more permanent. Lauren laughs at something and then touches her mate's arm, and his bird-bat thing flutters from the top of his head to the top of hers. J'shel tosses his long braid and gestures at something in the distance, his head bent together with Hannah.
Okay, it's freaking lonely being at camp and your mate is out hunting without you. Maybe I need to get over my squeamishness and learn how to hunt so we can spend more time together. Or maybe he can fish more after this. Something. Because I'm envious of everyone spending time with their man, while mine was dragged away at dawn to go hunting and get scolded.
Weird how I'm already this attached after only a few weeks. I wonder if that's normal or if it's something more than that. I try to imagine what it'd be like if M'tok never came back from hunting. He just…left. Decided he didn't want to be here.
The thought makes me paralyzed and sends a cold ripple through my body. My gut churns.
Yeah, okay, that's enough of that. I shiver, shaking off the sensation, and decide to go look for Marisol.
I find my friend in the “scrap” cave. Ravenclaw cave, I like to call it, since all the brainiacs hang out here. Mari jumps to her feet the moment I enter, sheer delight on her face. “You’re back! I was wondering when I’d get to see you again.” She immediately switches to Spanish, beaming at me. “Come and give me a hug, sister.”
I cross the cave and envelope her in a big, squeezing hug. So many hugs this morning, and it’s not even lunch. She laughs as I do, though, and I figure all this hugging isn’t so bad. Over her shoulder, I see T’chai approaching with a basket of parts, heading toward Mari’s normal table she works at. He watches us out of the corner of his eye, but I know he’s curious.
“How are things on the home front?” I ask her in Spanish. “I miss anything good?”
“All’s quiet. You’re the one with all the news!” She pats my arm. “Come and sit down and tell me all about it.” She turns and looks at T’chai. “Can you get my friend a seat?”
“Of course.” His expression is stiff, but he turns and pulls one of the stools next to Mari’s. “Shall I get you tea from the fire?”
“That would be great, thank you.” She smiles at him, then holds my hand, watching him as he leaves. The moment he’s gone, she turns to me, her voice lowered. “You know he can understand Spanish, right? His translator chip.”
“Do we not want him to hear us?” I’m surprised. Marisol doesn’t have a sneaky bone in her body. She’s the gentlest, most timid person I’ve ever met—my Latina polar opposite. “Is everything okay?”
“Everything’s fine,” she promises with a pat on my hand. “I want to know what it was like.”
“What?”
“Resonance.”
Her question startles me. “I’m confused—I thought you resonated.”
“I did.” Mari bites her lip. “I want to know what it feels like when it ends. When everything’s completed.” She touches her chest, her expression so sad that it makes me ache. “We didn’t get to finish, you know? Now we’re just in limbo. We’re not parents, we’re not resonance mates…we’re just more than friends but not quite anything else. I guess I want to know what it feels like when everything quiets down. Do you feel differently about him? Do you feel pregnant? What?”
“Oh.” Her words make me a little uncomfortable. I’ve seen the looks T’chai gives her and I know that he feels like “more than just friends” but I also know that the islanders think differently than the way humans do. I also remember how Mari confided in me that the healer had turned off everything inside her and that she doesn’t feel “right” anymore. My poor friend. What do I say? “I don’t feel different, just like…relieved? Like I’m coming down off of the best orgasm ever.”
She laughs.
“You just feel good. Happy. Relieved. I don’t feel pregnant, but maybe that kicks in later.” I touch my stomach, thinking about the small bulge of Brooke’s belly after months-ago resonance. “Might be a lot later.”
“But you’re happy?” Her expression is wistful. “You seem happy.”
“I am. I feel…lighter than I have in a long time. I’m not angry at the world anymore. Or at him. I mean, don’t get me wrong, he can be impossible, but we’re figuring each other out.”
“Are you in love?” She leans in and whispers. “Everyone else seems to be in love the moment resonance hits.”
I rub my chest, thinking. “It’s hard to know where the cootie ends and Callie begins, you know? Am I happy because of resonance or am I happy because of him? I don’t know.”
“You’re in love,” she says emphatically. “I can tell.”
“I’m not sure—”
“You are. It might be immediate, but that doesn’t mean it’s wrong. Trust yourself. Trust your gut. I wish I’d trusted mine.”
A throat clears behind us. Mari’s sad expression changes to a bland one and she smiles at me, then gives that same benign smile to T’chai. “Thank you for the tea.”
He hands her the cup, then hands me one. Turning back to his mate, he studies her. “Can I get you anything else?”
“No, I’m fine.” Her mask slips a little and she looks anything but fine. It breaks my heart to see her pretending so hard, but she puts on a silly grin and gestures at me. “So give me all the gossip. You left with him willingly?”
I blink, trying to decide what to tell Mari. T’chai doesn’t seem to be going anywhere. He hovers behind her, watching her closely. Occasionally he’ll glance at me, which tells me that he’s listening to our words, but his focus is always completely and entirely upon Marisol.
“Ah…it wasn’t willing at first,” I confess. “He drugged me and carried me off and I was pretty mad when I woke up. But I don’t want him to get in trouble, so that stays between the three of us.”
T’chai snorts. “It explains S’bren’s disappearance with a female as well. He vanished the same night you did, with P’nee. We suspected as much. When M’tok gets an idea, he will not let it go.”
“I’ve noticed,” I say dryly.
“S’bren is not the leader. M’tok got all the cleverness in that family.” He taps his brow. “But S’bren is strong and loyal. He will make a good mate to P’nee.”
If Penny wants him, but Penny is a little man-crazy, but in a different way than Tia is. Tia wants to win all the hearts. Penny wants a wedding. I think she’s in love with the idea of being married. In fact, I have no doubt in my mind that if S’bren gets that girl a leather wedding dress and a fur veil, she’ll be on him li
ke white on rice. “Mmm. We didn’t see them.”
“Do you know where they went?”
I shrug. “If they were supposed to meet up, it never happened. We stayed in a hunter cave one night and then M’tok said he would bring me back to the village, but we got lost trying to find a shortcut.”
“What?” T’chai interrupts again. “Lost?”
“Yeah. There was a pass up through the mountains we were supposed to take but M’tok got lost.”
His eyes narrow at me. “You went…into the mountains to return to the village?”
Well, when he puts it that way, it does sound dumb. “Like I said, we got lost.”
“Ah.” T’chai doesn’t look like he believes me, but Mari touches his arm and he goes silent.
“So you went into the mountains,” Mari says. “Where did you stay?”
I tell them all about our adventure, of finding the big cave with the handprints and figures on the walls, of the mountain goats, and our first fishing adventure when M’tok fell into the ice.
That makes T’chai break in again. When I mention M’tok made a mistake and broke the ice underneath his feet, the big Tall Horn hunter snorts with derision.
“What?” I ask, breaking my story. “What now?”
He shrugs. “Nothing.” But he smiles as if he has a secret.
“Not nothing. Spit it out.”
T’chai studies me for a long moment. After a time, he says, “M’tok is meticulous.”
“The phrase I would have used was ‘anal retentive’ but yes, I noticed.”
“You think such a careful hunter would make so many mistakes? After planning for so long to steal you away?”
I narrow my eyes at him. “So you’re saying he tricked me.”
T’chai shrugs. “You are his mate. You know him best.”
Do I? Because now that I think about it, every time M’tok made a “mistake” it was in his favor. He got us lost…which led us into our mountain cave and didn’t get us back to the village. He fell into the water and I heated him with my body—and that broke the ice between us in a million ways. After that, we kissed and made out until resonance seemed like a natural extension of things.
T’chai is right. The man that plotted to drug me and steal me away wouldn’t be careless about small things like that.
Sneaky-ass Slytherin M’tok played me.
But I smile brightly as if I was in on it. “I have to go for now.”
“You do?” Mari looks disappointed. “So soon?”
“I forgot something in Brooke’s hut,” I say, getting to my feet. “Some thread. I need to work on some sewing.” I pat her hand and smile to take the sting out of my words. “I’ll catch up with you later tonight or tomorrow, all right?”
Because today, I have to get a little revenge on the alien that manipulated me and played me for a fool. Three times he abused my trust—he drugged me, lied to me about taking me back to the village (Lost! Yeah right!), and pretended to be an idiot on the ice so I’d have to naked-snuggle with him to warm him up.
Two can play the sneaky game, though.
29
M’TOK
By the time I return to camp that night, the last thing I want to hear is another sa-khui hunter lecture me on how I should treat my mate. I have been threatened if she is unhappy, told how to please her, and given suggestions on things humans like. It is as if my Calida has an entire tribe of older brothers in the sa-khui hunters, and they are all determined to ensure that she is content with me.
I do not mind it, because I am glad so many are looking out for my mate. But I am tired of hearing their voices when all I want to do is get back to Calida’s side. I have missed her this day. I am glad that she is back and safe at camp, returned to her friends, but at the same time, I want to be at her side. I know they will talk, and I worry she will find out that her sly M’tok is more sly than she imagined.
And my sweet mate can hold a grudge when she is angry.
As if my thoughts have summoned her, my mate appears. She stands by the fire, talking with the pink-maned mate of T’shen, a smile on her face. It is dark outside, which means the tribe will be gathering for the evening meal, and good scents drift through the camp. I have brought home a fat dvisti for my mate, but I can hang it in one of the storage tents to butcher later and spend tonight at her side.
I approach the fire, and the moment Calida sees me, her eyes gleam. She gives me a thoughtful look, then heads toward me.
I pull her into my arms the moment she comes close, grinning. “I missed you, my mate.”
“Did you?” She smiles up at me and pats my cheek. “I thought about you all day.”
“You did?” I am pleased.
“Oh yeah. I thought about you a lot.” There is a strange note to her tone, but her smile is brilliant. “I decorated one of your tunics and laid it out for you. Go and put it on for me? I’ll wait here.”
I am pleased that she thought of me today. That she missed me as much as I missed her. There is an odd look in her eyes that makes me wonder what she is up to, though. I know my Calida. I know how she thinks, and her mind is definitely focused on something she is not sharing. “I will be right back,” I promise her. “Unless you want to come with me?” I give her an enticing look.
Calida considers it for a moment, then gestures at the fire. “I’ll wait here.” There’s a sly promise in her gaze that suggests she is not putting me off for long, though. So I head back to my hut as quickly as possible. The tunic she mentioned is there, with an unusual pattern on the front of small, repeating lines. I cannot make out what it is supposed to be, but it does not matter. That my mate thought of me and made this for me is enough. I slide it over my head and horns, tug my mane out of the collar, and then go to show it to my mate.
As I approach the fire once more, one of the females passes by. T’ia. She stands with her arm linked to S’ssah’s and when she sees me, she freezes. Then she giggles, her hand over her mouth, and whispers something to the male with her, who frowns. No doubt they are still upset over the fact that I stole my mate out of the camp. Let them be upset. I got what I wanted. I smile widely at them to show I am unconcerned with their opinions, and head forward.
When I get to the fire, more people whisper and stare. A few snicker. My mate looks deep in conversation with M’rsl, and when I go to stand next to her, Calida turns to me and smiles widely. Too widely.
“I made you some tea.” She holds the cup out to me.
I take it from her and immediately the sweet scent of visshek touches my nose. Someone else passes by—L’z—stares at my chest, and snorts. At my mate’s side, M’rsl deliberately avoids looking at me, her mouth twitching.
Aha.
That is what is different, then. The look in my mate’s eyes is slightly challenging, though her smile is sweet.
She knows about my lies. Someone has told her, or she realized the truth. And now she has decided to play games to get her revenge on me. I study the cup in my hands, the visshek obvious to anyone with a nose. Then I look up at my mate, hold her gaze, and down the entire cup.
Her smile widens.
It is that smile that makes me know everything is fine. Calida is playing some sort of game, and is perhaps irritated that she found out I lied to her, but she does not hate me. If she was furious, her anger would be flashing in her eyes and I would have no smiles. So I hand the cup back to her and lean in. “It will not take long for the visshek to work on me. Should we retreat to our hut so you can chide me in private or do you want me to collapse in front of everyone?”
She links her arms around one of mine, holding onto me. “I’m not going to chide you. I’m just making good on a promise.” And she flutters her lashes at me.
“Is that so?” I smile at her, already feeling the herb coursing through my veins. A little at first, but it will grow stronger with every breath that passes.
M’rsl’s face is bright red and she will not look me in the eye. “I ah, I’m going
to leave now.” She presses her hand to her mouth and hurries away, glancing at my chest again.
I look around the camp, and everyone’s watching me with amusement. I pull my mate closer to me and lean in to her ear, whispering, “Something tells me there is a problem with my tunic. What is this pattern?”
“I might have written a little something on it.” She gives me another too-sweet smile, her fingers playing on my chest, right over the design.
“What is that?”
“It might say ‘I am a jerkface.’”
I bark with laughter. Ah, she is definitely mad. For some reason, I am proud of her response. My Calida is not strong and burly, so she makes war with her needle and a cup of tea. “Do we go to our hut to talk about this or are you leaving me for the night, then?”
I put my hand out to her in silent invitation, waiting.
Without hesitation, she slips her hand into mine, and I feel a surge of pleasure as we leave the group and head back to our hut. In all of this, despite things, she chooses to be with me.
No matter what, I have not lost her.
The relief I feel is overwhelming, and I cannot stop grinning.
“You shouldn’t look so happy that I drugged you,” my mate mutters as we head back to our hut. “It takes some of the fun out of it.”
“I could smell it in the tea,” I say. “And you promised you would do it to me, so this is your chance. After this, all debts will be paid.”
“I’m not so sure about that. It seems like someone had a few more debts than he told me about.”
“Oh?” My mind is slower to grasp what she says, the visshek working quickly. She must have put a lot into my drink.