Ash beamed with delight once Dave had gone. He had taken the holiday so well. There was no bad feeling, he hadn’t questioned why she hadn’t invited him nor did he sulk. It was nice that he was so cool about it all and that he could joke about half-naked men. Suddenly she panicked. What if it wasn’t a joke, what if he meant the comment about half-naked men and was covering his emotions? After all, he did leave immediately after.
Ash slumped on to the sofa. She was just going to have to put it out of her mind. What will be, will be, she told herself.
* * *
The next day at 8.30 pm Dave heard the door open then two voices. One was Peter’s, the other a female voice. He got up from the sofa to meet them.
‘This is the living room,’ Peter said to the girl. ‘This is Dave, my brother. Ignore him—he just lives here.’
‘Hi ya,’ said a smiley girl with long dark wavy hair and green eyes.
‘Hi,’ Dave stood there for a second before it clicked. She was looking at the flat to rent the third room. He smiled and awkwardly offering a hand for her to shake.
Peter continued to show her round the rest of the flat before escorting her out.
‘So what do you think?’
‘I thought a girl flatmate was a joke, Pete.’
‘It kinda was, then she rung up today so I made an executive decision to let her view the place, brov, don’t be so uptight. She’s hot… and get this she likes football and she knows how to cook a curry.’
Dave shook his head. ‘Come on, Dave, she’s perfect. She wants the room—’
‘You’ve already said yes, haven’t you?’
‘Em… well… yeah. But I did say I would clear it with you first.’
Dave rolled his eyes. It might not be such a bad thing, he thought. Does it really matter what sex they are—after all, a flatmate is a flatmate—as long as they pay the rent on time, why should it be a problem. He thought about it for a moment and also briefly reflected on Ash’s take on a female flatmate, and a hot one at that. He paced the room thinking. He trusted her enough about her going on holiday so she would just have to trust him enough if he were to live with a female flatmate, not to mention the fact that they hardly knew each other. Dave had never had such conflicting thoughts before, not over a woman. He wondered how Ash had got under his skin so quickly—not that he minded.
‘Tell her we’ll draw up a contract for a three-month trial first,’ he said, walking into the kitchen.
‘I’ll have a coffee if you’re making one. You have to admit Dave she has a nice arse, perfectly formed breasts—’ Peter rubbed his groin in jest, making Dave laugh in disbelief.
‘She isn’t bad, bruv—not as hot as Ash though.’
‘Yeah, Ash looked very hot from what I saw. Fancy sharing her?’ said Peter, picking up his coffee.
‘Not this one. I really like her. You just stick to your new conquest, mate.’ Dave glared at Peter then smiled, turning back to his coffee. ‘So what’s her name? . . . tell me you know her name.’
‘What do you take me for?’
‘Do you want me to answer that?’
‘Na, no need to answer that one, brov. Isabella, she’s Latino.’
‘I noticed. Just don’t screw this one—she’s going to be living with us.’
Chapter 4
Just as Ash sat herself down at the table to eat dinner, the phone rang. Picking it up, she heard a very upset voice at the other end. It took Ash a moment to make sense of who it was.
‘In your own time, Rach. Slow down,’ Ash spoke softly.
Rachel was in floods of tears and spluttered out that her grandmother had died, instantly stunning Ash as she listened.
Rachel had lived with her grandparents since the age of six after her mother and father had been killed in a helicopter crash off the coast of Scotland. She was extremely close to her grandparents. Her grandmother had been battling against cancer successfully for so long but everybody had known that it was only a matter of time before the cancer would take a firm hold upon her frail body and it had become increasingly hard for her to fight it. Mary was a lovely lady and Ash was very fond of her.
Ash still remembered the day when Rachel found out her parents had been killed, and how her grandmother was a tower of strength for them. The weekend that they died Rachel and Ash had both stayed over at her grandparents’ house in the Wiltshire countryside near Salisbury where Rachel and Ash both lived while Rachel’s mother and father went to visit friends in Scotland. Rachel’s father loved flying; it was too expensive for them to buy a helicopter but they flew his friend’s helicopter whenever they visited. Rachel’s parents hadn’t been up to see their friends in Scotland since her mother had become pregnant with Rachel; her father would plead with her mother but Rachel’s mother couldn’t bring herself to leave her only child while she was so young.
‘When she’s older,’ she would promise.
When Rachel was approaching seven, she decided the time was right and Rachel wouldn’t mind so much if they left her for a weekend—they didn’t know that they would never return.
Ash still vividly remembered that dreadful day. It was midday Sunday afternoon when Ash, Rachel and her grandparents had returned from church. Ash and Rachel ran laughing into the house, heading upstairs to play with the big old—fashioned doll’s house they both loved. Ash remembered hearing the phone ringing downstairs then what sounded like crying, but being only six and a half she took no notice, only stopping to listen for a split second.
Rachel’s grandmother didn’t tell them until that evening after she had composed herself in order to be strong enough for her only grandchild. As the girls grew up together they both developed a great respect for Grandma Mary, as Rachel only knew her really as a mother. She was a strong, dignified woman—a hero in both Rachel and Ash’s eyes, who would help any soul in need, often putting others’ needs before her own.
The news of her grandmother’s death had hit Rachel hard and she was not coping with her loss quite as strongly as Mary had over the death of Rachel’s mother all those years before. For Rachel, her pillar of strength had been taken from her and she wanted Ash with her for support.
‘Rach, of course I’ll be there. D’you need me to drive you?’
‘No thanks,’ Rachel sniffed. ‘I’m leaving now.’
‘Are you sure you should drive? I can come with you. I’ll just get my things togeth—’
‘No, Ash, really—I want to go on my own. You stay. Come down tomorrow. I’ll be fine. Promise.’
‘OK, if that’s what you want. I’m so sorry, Rach.’
Ash hung up and broke into sobs on the floor.
* * *
Ash woke before her alarm, then packed some things for the journey. She called work, explaining as best she could before breaking down again into sobs over the phone. Eliza understandably told her to take time off and to be with Rachel and her grandfather, reassuring her that she would manage without her.
Late that morning Ash set off for the countryside.
The journey through London was slow. She drummed her fingers on the steering wheel as she sat sandwiched in between two juggernauts. The traffic fumes she was breathing sat heavily around her as she waited in the queue edging forward bit by bit until she finally reached the slip road on to the M4. Putting her foot down she picked up speed and before she knew it, the juggernauts were far behind her as she whizzed down the fast lane. So many thoughts danced around in her head and she switched on the radio to distract herself, but couldn’t drown them out.
Memories of Mary playing with her and Rachel when they were younger made her smile, thoughts flashed in her mind of riding Tarquini, Rachel’s silver horse, and how Mary taught her to ride bareback. Picnics in the fields with family, and how Mary and Robert, Rachel’s grandfather, would get all the young kids in the village to come over to play rounders on the front garden with them. He had so many scout games for them that they never got bored indoors or out.
Ash check
ed her speedo—90 mph. Trees and fields flew past her. She had given up trying to listen to the radio and moved into the left-hand lane, slowing the car down to 50 mph to let down her roof, then off she went racing back up to 70, 80 then 90 mph where she stayed for most of the way. Thoughts of Dave kept popping into her head; she thought about stopping at the next service station to phone him, but carried on, not wanting to waste any time. Hearing her mobile ring she hoped it would be him but as she glanced over at the name on the screen she saw ‘Lee’ flashing across her phone.
‘Oh bugger off,’ she shouted, letting it ring. Not now she thought. Of all the times to start messing with her head, now was not one of them. Her feelings for Lee hadn’t completely subsided and he still tugged at her heartstrings. She knew in time he would be a distant memory but for now he was a painful hangover.
At least two hours had passed. She found herself stuck behind a tractor on a small twisty country lane, her head pounding with stress after the motorway drive. She reached inside her bag to find her cigarette case whilst she sat in another queue of slow-moving traffic. At least the surroundings were more calming this time. There was no point in rushing as she wouldn’t be any use to Rachel if she arrived stressed, she told herself.
The rest of the journey was relatively easy, the sun was beating down on her shoulders and face, soothing her emotions a little; the pain was still raw and she still wished Mary was alive, but tried to remind herself of all the good times they had had. She got close to Downton where Rachel’s grandparents lived and decided to stop in a small pub for a drink first.
Sitting on the grass in the pub garden with a glass of orange juice, she looked around; there were horses in the adjacent field grazing on the grass. She tried to clear her mind again, taking a long deep breath in. She wondered what Dave was doing now and pulled out her phone. She tried to call but it went to his voicemail. Deciding not to leave a message, Ash put her phone away. She lay back on the grass, closing her eyes and listening to the birds and the sounds of the countryside which she hadn’t heard for so long, before she resumed the rest of her journey.
Ash arrived at Rachel’s grandparents an hour later. She took a deep breath as she drove up the long shingled bendy driveway to the house. She noticed they still had the wooden swinging chair she loved as a child situated in the same place, motionless on the front lawn.
She parked and walked around the outside of the house to the rear. The garden and garden furniture had changed from the last time she had been there; she stood looking over a new patio with sun chairs and a dark wooden table set. There was a water feature beside her, a fountain trickling into some kind of odd-shaped cylinder, then back out the top, to start the cycle again. She remembered Rachel telling her that Robert and Mary redecorated the house when the kids in the neighbourhood had stopped coming round so much. Ash stood looking out over the garden down to the far end; she could still see the horse stables with Tarquini grazing in his field. Turning, she noticed fresh drinks on the table so she wandered inside to find everyone.
Stepping into the back dining room through the French doors she looked around at the newly painted walls; even though it had changed it still felt the same old house. There was the same grand piano in the corner, and the armchairs may have been new but placed back in the same place as the old ones stood, same brick fireplace, new mirror above it but again in the same place where the old one hung before.
Same room just modernised, thought Ash, smiling to herself. She walked into the hallway hearing a noise. She looked up to see an old collie running towards her.
‘Saber… Hello boy.’ She bent down, rubbing her hands all over his coat then burying her face in his fur. ‘Where are they, boy?’
Standing up, Saber ran off into the front room. Ash followed but no one was in there. He picked up a ball, dropping it at her feet.
‘Later boy, later,’ she said, looking out of the window to her car. It was then she realised her car was the only car there; they must have gone out somewhere.
Couldn’t have gone far, she thought. The house is unlocked.
She brought her stuff in from the car with Saber at her heel, still like a puppy wanting to play. He must be nearing the end off his little life, she thought. She took her things up to Rachel’s room where she used to sleep, finding the same old single beds on either sides of the room. To her delight the big old doll’s house in the corner was still intact: their room hadn’t been touched; it was as if she could hear the sound of Rachel and her giggling as a children.
Saber didn’t quite know what to do with himself; from behind her she could hear his tail banging against the door as he waited with his ball in his mouth, saliva dripping from the corners of his jaws.
‘Oh come on then, boy. Down we go,’ she said, clapping her hands.
She followed him out to the front lawn, throwing the ball for him as she sat on the swinging chair.
Dogs, she thought, they never grow up or run out of energy. Still the same old young puppy at heart.
‘Hello.’
A voice from behind made her jump. Turning around, Ash had to do a double take to be sure.
‘Gemma Collingridge!’ Ash said, with a surprised grin, eyeing her old school friend. Gemma gave Ash a huge hug, stepping back to look her up and down. Ash did the same, taking in the blonde shoulder-length hair instead of the long brown locks Ash remembered.
‘You look great, Ash.’
‘So do you, Gems. I’m so glad you’re here.’
Taking her hand Ash led her around to sit on the swinging chair. She asked about the village and if she had seen Mary recently.
‘I moved back to the village two years ago, after I broke up with Steve. I was going to divorce him.’ Gemma’s smile faded as she looked at the floor. ‘He cheated on me with a girl from the gym. I tried to stay with him but it didn’t work so I moved home.’ She looked at Ash then smiled. ‘But he begged and I went back to him—silly really as he cheated on me with her again.’
‘No!’
‘Yeah, so I’ve been back for six months. The divorce is through and I’m a single woman again.’
‘I’m sorry, Gem, same kind of thing happened to me. Men are all pigs.’ Ash swallowed. ‘Did you see much of Mary before she—’ She felt a lump in her throat.
‘Mary was a real pillar for me when I came home the first time. I sat with her every evening after work, drinking tea and eating biscuits. I would cry and she would rub my back then hand me another biscuit.’
Ash laughed. ‘That sounds right, Mary’s answer to any problem.’
‘Umm.’ Gemma tilted her head at the memory. ‘Then the second time I came home she supplied me with the same but you could tell she was getting weaker. She caught a cold and—’
‘I know.’
‘My mum and dad moved away last year—did you know?’
‘No. Where have they gone?’
‘Jersey.’ Gemma rolled her eyes ‘They bought a B&B. They want me to help run it with them.’
‘I take it you don’t want to.’
‘Ash please. No way, a B&B at my age?’ Gemma laughed and pushed her feet into the ground, making the chair swing slightly ‘Mum and Dad are coming over for the funeral.’
‘Are they? Be nice to see them again. Just wish it was under different circumstances. So where are you living?’
‘Here.’
‘Here, with Robert?’
‘Yeah, Mary insisted I stayed. I think she wanted to make sure I didn’t go back to Steve again—plus Mum and Dad had sold the house and moved so I kinda didn’t have anywhere to go.’
‘Mary never mentioned it—’
‘I know. I told Rachel last night that I asked Mary and Robert not to tell anyone until I was back on my feet. You and Rach have done so well for yourselves I just wish I could compete. It was bad enough I chose married life at the age of twenty over moving to London with you two but to then have it all go wrong… I just didn’t want you both to think badly of me.’
‘Oh don’t be daft. You should have kept in touch. God, so much has happened. How did we lose touch so easily?’
‘I know it was my fault. I never called anyone once the wedding was over. It was like I turned into a fifty-year-old housewife over night. I was so obsessed with making Steve happy I forgot to make myself happy.’
‘Your wedding was the last time I saw you. God, we were all drunk that night. Did you know Rachel shagged Tom Kimpton in the bushes?’
‘No way!’
‘Yeah and after you left for the honeymoon we sneaked into the hotel pool and went skinny-dipping. Well, Tom and Rachel did—I just dipped, you know me. And we got caught.’
‘No way!’
‘Yeah, Rachel and Tom blamed it on me—said I told them it was allowed. Some may have believed us if we hadn’t all been so badly drunk. My mum made me write a letter of apology.’
‘Oh. My. God. Why didn’t I call you guys!’
Ash laughed. ‘Don’t beat yourself up over it. We should have called you too. Anyway we’re back in touch now.’
‘Yeah and this time I’ll call.’ Gemma hugged Ash.
‘And we will call you too.’ Ash reciprocated.
‘Still hurts like hell when I think about him with her and I know I shouldn’t be selfish but I wish Mary was here to listen to me moan on about it all.’
‘I’m sure she can still hear you, sweetie, and anyway you can moan to me now.’
* * *
‘How much stuff does she have?’
Dave looked at the boxes of shoes and books, bending down to pick up a giant pink fluffy pen from one of the boxes. He raised his eyebrows in shock of what he had let himself in for.
Gut Feeling Page 5