by Jean Joachim
It was Meg.
“Hey, Squirt.”
“Hey, yourself, you big jerk. What the hell did you do to Penny?”
“Did she call you?”
“I called her. We talk from time to time. I like her. She wouldn’t speak to me. What the hell happened, and what did you do?”
“Nothing. It’s not your business.”
“Everything about you is my business. You’re my twin.”
“Not this. Butt out.”
“Don’t you dare hang up on me!” Meg yelled into the phone.
She always called when he most needed to talk to her. How did she know? Twin telepathy? He caved. “Okay, okay. You don’t have to yell.”
“Tell me, Lug,” she said, her voice soft. “You’re hurting. Tell me what happened.”
He took a beer from the fridge, sat back on the sofa and spilled everything. Meg listened, only interrupting occasionally with a question.
“Wow. Are you okay? Did that demon seed, Sweetwater, injure you? Can you play?”
“I’m a little banged up. I’ll live. Yeah, I can still play.”
“What are you going to do?”
“I don’t know.” Then, it happened, something that hadn’t happened since he was fifteen. He cried in front of his sister. Tears cascaded down his face, his voice shook, and he couldn’t control it, no matter how hard he tried.
“Oh, Lug, Mark…” Meg started to cry on the other end.
That made Mark laugh. “We can’t both cry, Squirt,” he said.
Megan sniffled into the phone. “I know you’re really upset. But I can’t believe you didn’t let her explain.”
“It doesn’t make any difference why she did it. It’s done.”
“Come on, Mark. You’re no innocent, either. You’ve done a few marginal things in your life.”
“Yeah? Like what?”
“Like when your girlfriend discovered you in Miami with two women in your bed.”
“Those were Darvin’s women. I just gave them a place to sleep.”
“Sure, sure. Did she believe you?”
“No, and who told you?”
“What difference does it make? I know.”
He plucked another beer from the fridge. “Harley.”
“And your teammates? Not exactly a bunch of Choir Boys, either! How many have been caught with their pants down? There was the one with a ménage, and wasn’t there a tight end who exposed himself? And a guard arrested for an illegal gun?”
“All right, all right. I get it.”
“Did you think a woman as pretty as she is, and an actress, might not have a past?”
There was silence.
“Lug?”
“I’m still here. I hadn’t thought of it like that.” He took a swig.
“Date an ugly girl, and you won’t have nude photos showing up. At least hear her out. How can you break up when you don’t know why she did it?”
That idea had been nagging him ever since his blow-up. Leave it to Meg to find the sore spot. I should have listened. “I was too angry. It wouldn’t have mattered what she said.”
“I get it. Are you calm enough to listen now?”
“Maybe.”
“I’m going to call her and find out what it is. I’ll call you back.” She hung up.
Mark pressed play and watched the rest of the program. God, he missed Penny. What the hell had he done? Meg was right. None of the guys on his team could throw stones at Penny or him, either. When he thought about them, there were plenty of skeletons to go around. Shame swept through him. I didn’t even give her a chance. Now, it might be too late.
When the show was over, he remembered her last words. “Call me when you’re rational.” Maybe she’d explain to him now. Before he could dial, his cell rang again. Maybe it’s Penny.
Chapter Six
Penny didn’t remember how she had gotten home that night. She had been numb, her body working without her mind giving orders. Mark’s anger shook her to her roots. Yes, she had done something she was ashamed of, but for a desperate reason.
She went to a coffee shop and sat by the window sipping an iced latte, remembering the cold look in his eyes. One glance from him had chilled her to the bone, and she shivered at the memory. They say love can turn to hate in an instant. Guess that’s true. A heaviness surrounded her heart as sadness seeped deeper inside.
What’s wrong with me? How could I fall so hard, so fast? Where’s my head? Out to lunch. Had she loved Mark? It had started out as only a bit of friendship and strong physical attraction. His handsome face, clear blue eyes, and gorgeous, fit body had lured her. The lingering scent of his aftershave mixed with his unique essence had seduced her, too.
She had fought it, afraid she’d get dumped by a callow athlete just out for easy sex. But she had gotten a peek underneath his jersey and found a heart of gold. Mark was a real man in ways no other guy she’d dated could claim. Her first keeper. You only need one.
She admired his responsibility to his family, his loyalty to his friends and his team. He seemed so solid, a hard worker, a star. Just exactly the kind of man she’d been looking for. Mark Davis, a rock, sexy, warm, funny, and at the top of his game. A tidal wave of love had washed over her, warming and opening her heart. As quickly as it came, it had disappeared, leaving cold suspicion in its wake. Penny was stunned, breathless, speechless, and bereft.
She wanted Mark, with every fiber of her being. Wanted to make love with him, wanted him to love her and to love him back. She had given him her heart before she’d thought about it. He had claimed it, and she went along, willingly, eagerly. Now, it lay broken in a million pieces. He was gone. She was alone and sure she’d never find another man so strong and vital to replace him.
Thoughts of Mark brought fresh tears. They were to wash away the pain, but they never did. The release of sorrow helped lighten her load, but only temporarily. Her roommates questioned her when she returned in a fog, unresponsive and dazed. But she couldn’t answer. She was still coping with what had happened, trying to take it in.
Shame at the humiliation Mark had endured in front of his teammates made her blush. She wished with all her heart she could wipe those pictures from the memories of the men. Mortification for having caused the man she adored so much agony filled her heart. I don’t deserve him. As much as her rational mind told her that, she refused to let him go.
After a few days with no communication, she knew he wasn’t going to reach out to her, and the wound was re-opened, like a scab ripped off prematurely. It bled anew. He’s gone. Face it. But she couldn’t give up hope. What we had was real. He must feel what I feel. She waited, day after day, for the call that never came.
She left the café and strolled home. A brief breeze tickled her neck. For a second, she thought it was the brush of Mark’s fingers.
She loved the way he touched her, sometimes gentle, sometimes passionate and demanding. She ached for him every night. It was as if her body had a memory, and when she slipped between the sheets, her senses heightened, awaiting glorious lovemaking with Mark. Falling asleep tucked in his arms was the best. Disappointment left her feeling frustrated and abandoned.
Then, Megan called, just to catch up. To chat, shoot the breeze, gossip a bit, and trade confidences the way they did about once a week. Penny had liked Meg right away. Her straightforward attitude and warmth had put Penny at ease immediately. They had hit it off, just like she had with Mark. After all, they’re twins.
The phone was insistent, and she couldn’t ignore it, though she’d have to grope for what to say when she spoke to Megan. She had answered.
With as few words as possible, Penny indicated she and Mark were no longer together. When quizzed by her new friend, she refused to explain. If Mark wants to tell her, let him, if he hasn’t already. I can’t. Finally unable to hold back tears, she hung up quickly, drying her eyes and turning off her cell. But not for long. Mark can’t reach me if the phone is off.
Finding the
concentration to memorize her lines was almost impossible. She kept reciting them aloud, hoping her brain was on automatic pilot and would remember. In the middle, the familiar ring sounded. She dove for it. Megan again.
“I spoke to Mark. I know everything from his side. But I don’t know yours. Please, tell me what happened, Penny? What drove you to have those pictures taken?”
Dying to explain to Mark, she broke down with Megan. Words rushed out of her in an avalanche, hurtling through her mouth before Megan could take it all in.
“Slow down, slow down! I won’t hang up, I promise.”
Penny took a deep breath. “Okay.”
“All right. Start from the time you got the verdict.”
****
Mark was drinking a lager while watching re-runs of Las Vegas Beat when Meg called back.
“Hey, Squirt. What’s up?”
“I spoke to Penny.”
Mark put the TV on pause. “And?”
“And you need to talk to her. She told me why she posed for those pictures. I think it would change your mind, Lug. Call her.”
“Wait! Don’t hang up. What did she say?”
“Uh uh. I’m not going to be any more of a middleman than I am already. Call her. You need to talk to each other.”
“A quick phone conversation ought to do it.”
“Nope. In person. Call her to arrange a time and place. She won’t tell you over the phone. She’s already decided that.”
“Damn stubborn woman!” He sucked down a mouthful of beer.
Meg laughed. “Yeah, paired up with a damn stubborn man. Call her!” The phone went dead. The heaviness in him lifted a little. If Meg thinks it’s okay, then it probably is. He was excited and apprehensive at the thought of talking to Penny, but he opened his cell.
“Penny?”
Silence greeted him.
“Meg suggested I call you. She said we should get together. That you have something to say that I need to hear.”
“That’s what I tried to tell you.” The edge in her voice rankled him.
“Look, if this is going to be your chance to bash me, forget it.”
“Don’t hang up! Wait! No. It’s to share the truth with you.”
He couldn’t resist. “The truth?”
“The reason I posed for those pictures.”
“Okay. I’ll listen. Can you be here tomorrow after practice? I’ll pick up some burgers.”
“Are you sure? You don’t have to. I can feed myself,” she said.
“It’s okay. I want to.”
She seemed surprised by his offer. There was no heat of anger inside him now, only a hollowness he desperately needed to fill. “All right. See you around six.” She ended the call.
The next day, Mark approached the locker room with new hope. He ignored comments from Darvin because he couldn’t afford another huge fine, but it didn’t stop his wanting to smash the quarterback’s smug face. His other teammates tiptoed around the issue, not anxious to rile the second-stringer. Mark explained to Harley about his planned meeting with Penny.
“I always liked her, Mark. Glad you’re not going to continue being a jerk.”
“A jerk?”
“You heard me. Let’s go.” Harley and Mark trotted out onto the field and began their warm-up exercises. His keen ability to concentrate had returned. He had the best practice he’d had in days. Coach nodded at him and almost smiled.
Energy once again surged through his veins. He didn’t know what Penny was going to say, but Megan’s reassurance calmed him, made him optimistic. While he sat on a bench, toweling his hair dry, he didn’t notice the other men leave the shower area. Darvin sauntered up to him.
“Davis. Got an offer you can’t refuse.”
“I have nothing to say to you, Sweetwater.”
“Coach says the owner is coming to see the practice in two weeks. That’s when he’s going to pick who to cut. Here’s the deal. You screw up, miss a throw or two, and I won’t send your girlfriend’s pictures to Celebs ’R Us.”
“Screw you.”
“Yeah? Her tits will look great spread across the cover on every newsstand in the country.”
Mark’s blood began to boil. He pushed to his feet and backed his enemy up against the wall. “Asshole! You do that, and I’ll…”
“There you are!” Harley said, pulling on Mark’s arm, yanking him away from trouble.
“Remember what I said,” Darvin hissed.
“Let’s go, let’s go, ladies are waiting,” Harley said, pushing Mark to his locker.
Mark dressed quickly and followed Harley to the parking lot.
“What were you doing?” Harley asked when they were a safe distance away.
“That fucking asshole is going to send Penny’s pictures to a tabloid if I don’t blow practice.”
“What?”
“You heard me. It’s blackmail. He demanded that I screw up when the owner comes for his final evaluation.”
Harley stopped in his tracks. “That dirty son of a bitch!”
“He can threaten all he wants. I need this job. This is my career, and I’m not going to let him push me out.”
“What about Penny?”
Mark stopped. He didn’t want to hurt her, but having those pictures taken was her choice. She’d have to live with it. “Nothing I can do. Besides, I wouldn’t trust him not to send them in no matter what I do. She made that bed, she’ll have to lie in it.”
****
Penny paced nervously in front of Mark’s building. Since she no longer had the key, she’d have to wait until he got home to go inside. It had been a busy day. She had done some retakes in the morning, followed by a quick rehearsal for her scene the next day. Then the hairdresser, nail salon, and a long, hot bath before she faced the wrath of Mark.
Finally, she spotted his car drive up. He looked taller as he approached. His stride was easy, not angry. Maybe he’s not mad anymore? He nodded at her and held the door open.
They were quiet in the elevator and all the way to the apartment. Mark put the bag of food down and offered her a beer or glass of wine. She opted for wine. He plopped down on the sofa, toying with his brew, and she sat opposite him, wrapping her delicate fingers around her glass. He made eye contact.
“Okay, Penny. Shoot. I’m listening.”
“Can I spit it out, and you ask questions when I’m done? Interruptions make me nervous.”
“Sure.”
She took a swallow of her wine, a deep breath, and began. “I was twenty-one when I had those taken. I had been modeling on and off, trying to get work in commercials. My father’s drinking had gotten so bad he couldn’t hold a job. I had moved back home and was making the mortgage payments, the car payments, and buying food to keep him from being homeless.”
“Don’t models make good money?”
She looked up at him. “Please, Mark.”
“Sorry.”
“I made decent money, when I worked, which wasn’t all the time. But the bills kept piling up. Electric, gas, phone, gas for the car. And, of course, liquor.”
“You paid for your father’s liquor? Why didn’t you just cut him off?”
“I did. He stole from me. Not all the time, but little bits here and there. Sometimes, a piece of jewelry went missing. My mother’s pearl necklace, my grandmother’s watch…” She stopped to take a breath, blinking back tears. He squeezed her hand.
“I’d see them in the pawn shop window. Sometimes, if I’d been working more, I’d foolishly buy them back instead of saving my money. He’d simply steal them again. Sometimes, he sold stuff from friends or acquaintances. Or, he’d run up a bar tab. And the marshall would come put a lien on the house until I paid up. The house was in his name. He had his little ways, and I was too naïve and stupid to be one step ahead.”
“It must have been hard.”
“It was. He’d apologize and say it wouldn’t happen again, but it always did. He kept taking my car and driving drunk. He got thr
ee DUI’s. That’s when I got the call. The call that changed everything.” She stopped to take a sip and compose herself.
“It was from the police. He’d been arrested. It was awful, because they wouldn’t let him out on bail this time. He had to stand trial. You can’t imagine what it does to see your father in jail.”
Mark sat quietly, staring at her. The expression on his face appeared sympathetic. But her confidence was so shaken, she didn’t trust her own instincts. “What did you do?” Mark sucked on his beer.
“The judge gave him one chance.”
“And that was?” Mark seemed to be hanging on every word.
“If my dad agreed to go to rehab, he’d suspend his sentence.” She sipped her wine.
“And did he?”
“We didn’t have the money to send him. I wanted to. He swore up and down that he’d kick alcohol, if he could only go to rehab instead of jail. I believed him. He seemed so sincere.”
“And did he?”
“With legal fees, on top of everything, I was broke. I’d been modeling some, but rehab was five thousand dollars a week. A week! Can you imagine? He was supposed to go for a minimum of three weeks. The counselor told me he needed to go for four weeks. Where was I going to get twenty grand?” Penny twisted a tissue in her hands.
Mark leaned forward. “What did you do?”
“I went crying to one of the photographers I knew. He’d asked me to pose nude before, but I’d turned him down. He’d offered me a lot of money.”
Mark hung his head. “But this time…”
“This time, I said ‘yes.’ I had no other choice. My back was to the wall. How could I let my father rot in jail for five years because I wouldn’t take my clothes off for a few pictures? He swore they were only for one private client and would never surface publicly. Like an idiot, I believed him. What would you have done?” By now, tears were streaming down her face. She tried to clean them up, but they kept coming. Mark sat with his head in his hands.
“I had no idea those pictures would still be around years later. If I’d known then that my father was manipulating me again and never intended to give up alcohol, I would’ve left him in jail. I was only twenty-one, and he was all I had. So, I believed him.”