Fear shimmied down her spine.
Her phone buzzed, and she was intensely grateful for whatever text she’d received. Probably Savvy telling her the devo had ended and it was time to leave for the game. She didn’t pull her phone from her pocket, though. She didn’t want to look away from him, just in case she was standing this close to someone who’d done something terrible. She needed to leave. Needed to run.
Why did you let me come here, God? Please. Protect me. Help me get away from him now.
“Elise.”
She sensed the agonizing pain in the single word.
“You don’t have any reason to be afraid of me,” he said, his words delivered softly, deliberately, as though he honestly feared she would flee.
Oddly, her feet refused to move. Maybe because she did feel something when he touched her, when he looked at her, or when he stood this close, close enough that she could see something different in his eyes. Sadness?
“You shouldn’t be afraid of me,” he repeated. “If anything—” he swallowed thickly, and then the corners of his mouth tilted down “—I should be afraid of you.”
Her skin prickled. Him, afraid of her? “What? Why?”
“The first time I saw you, you were in the woods. Crying. You were in pain, the kind of agony that I feel every day I breathe. I see you like that all the time, sometimes when I look at you, other times when I dream of you.”
The phone in her pocket buzzed again.
“I’m not the only one with a past I can’t forget,” he said gruffly. “Don’t let my problems keep me from helping Cody. I understand what he’s going through, and I care about him. I want—I need—to help you get him ready for that meeting, Elise. Let me.”
Another command. Delivered from a man who, though she hadn’t realized it, had seen her at her very weakest moment. And a man who’d awakened feelings she’d sworn to extinguish forever.
“I have to go.” She turned and started down the trail, her feet moving quicker with each step, until by the time she neared Willow’s Haven, she’d reached a full run. Running from the man who’d caused a kaleidoscope of emotions to overturn her world. Running from the possibility of trusting someone who would break her spirit again. And running from the fact that she suspected she’d left a piece of her heart at the other end of that trail.
Chapter Six
Elise had been too emotionally spent and too discouraged to annotate Cody’s daily progress last night. So when she woke at six to the sound of rain on the cabin’s tin roof, she grabbed her computer, opened Cody’s case file and updated his status.
Thirteen days. She had merely thirteen days to get Cody ready for a meeting that would affect his placement in school and, most likely, his ability to be adopted. How was she supposed to accomplish all of her goals for Cody in less than two weeks when she’d potentially lost all progress made so far in a single night?
After learning Savvy’s friend hadn’t brought the Mustang for fear of the upcoming thunderstorm, Cody hadn’t acknowledged anyone at the game. He hadn’t wanted the popcorn, cotton candy or soda that had been provided by the school for all of the Willow’s Haven children. And when the bus returned to the children’s home after the game, he hadn’t even looked at Elise when she told him she’d see him in the morning. He’d simply kept his head down until he reached his cabin, then entered without looking back.
As a counselor, she no longer had a course of action for Cody’s case. Her instincts had told her Jack would prove to be the best means of drawing him out of his shell, but after what happened yesterday with the odd text messages, plus the fact that Jack admitted problems in his past—and knew that she had secrets too—she doubted they’d ever venture down that trail again.
She had no idea that anyone had seen her the day she’d been crying in the woods. However, Jack had, and at her lowest moment since arriving at Willow’s Haven. She’d awakened with hope and excitement about her first week working with Cody, but then she’d looked at the date on her computer...the day Anthony died. And memories slammed her with a vengeance.
Entering their house with her arms filled with groceries. Smelling the lavender-scented candle she’d bought him to help him relax when he had a particularly tough day. Calling out to him that she planned to attempt his favorite dish, eggplant parmesan, and then they could spend the night cuddling on the couch and watching movies.
They’d been talking about having children, and she’d been very excited about that possibility. He’d had so much hope, and Elise felt she’d given him that hope. Ever since she’d told him she also wanted to have children, he’d been on cloud nine.
Yet that candle burned.
She’d unpacked the groceries and recalled the potent smell of the garlic as she pulled it from the Whole Foods sack. It was strong, almost strong enough to cover the scent of the candle.
But not quite.
Realization that something must have troubled him caused her to stop unpacking the sacks and start toward his office. When she’d left for work, he’d said he would have a list of potential baby names when she returned; he’d wanted a family name from his ancestors and intended to peruse the genealogy while she was at her office. He’d hardly seemed disappointed at all about his company downsizing and letting him go from his accounting job. Besides, Elise made plenty of income for both of them, and they’d be fine while he looked for another job. And worked on creating a new life.
The scent of lavender grew stronger as she put her hand on the knob of his office. She couldn’t remember any time when he’d closed the door before. She called out his name, turned the knob and entered.
Elise closed her eyes, hoping to stop the image before it invaded her world again, but she saw it anyway. Anthony, facedown on the floor, a gun beside his right hand, a note beside his left...and blood pooled across the hardwood.
Heart racing, she opened her eyes and focused on the log walls, the computer in her lap, anything to clear the horrible image from her mind. Anthony had been so troubled. And with all of her experience, she hadn’t realized how much.
Jack had seen her on the day all those emotions came to a head. Jack, also troubled. Jack, voluntarily withdrawn from the world. And Jack, perhaps her best means of helping Cody.
How could she help Cody without him?
Elise did the only thing she could think to do. She slid her eyes shut, bowed her head and prayed.
Dear God, I know that everything is in Your control, and I know You have a plan here, but I need courage. You know how much I care about Cody and his progress. You know how much I want him to find peace in the world again and have the potential to be adopted and loved and part of a true family once more. He’s hurting, Lord. And I believe You brought me here to help heal his pain.
Show me what I need to do. Give me the knowledge of what he needs most and let me get him ready for that meeting at the school. Open the eyes and hearts of those individuals at the IEP meeting to see what an intelligent and incredible young man Cody is. Please don’t let them hold him back, Lord. And please don’t let him get discouraged. Let him know how much he is loved by You. And let him know how much he is loved by me.
Her mind drifted to yesterday afternoon, and those final words from Jack:
Don’t let my problems keep me from helping Cody. I understand what he’s going through, and I care about him. I want—I need—to help you get him ready for that meeting, Elise. Let me.
Elise shook her head. She was always very focused when she prayed, yet thoughts of Jack had invaded the middle of her prayer. What would God think of that? Or had He pushed that memory forward, letting her know what she needed to do?
She continued her prayer.
Lord, is that what I need? To truly trust him? To let Jack help me get Cody ready for that meeting? Because I know he’s hiding from something, and I have
no doubt You know what that something is. How can I trust him with Cody when I don’t know the truth of his past?
Dampness trickled from her jaw down the column of her neck, and she realized that, at some point during her prayer, she’d started to cry. She wiped the tears away without opening her eyes and completed her plea.
God, I don’t know what You’re doing here, or what You want me to do, but if I need to trust Jack, show me how.
Then she added the part that would probably be the toughest for her to understand.
And, as in all things, Lord, let me remember that everything happens in Your time, but if it be Your will, let Your timing allow Cody to meet my goals for him...in thirteen days. Amen.
Opening her eyes, she saw her laptop screen had gone black, and she ran her finger over the touch pad to bring it to life. Cody’s case file filled the screen, with her status still highlighted. She saved the file and closed it, causing the search engine window to appear.
She stared at the blank field that centered the search engine. Yesterday, she’d returned to Willow’s Haven with just enough time to climb on the bus to go to the game. And when the group returned home last night, she’d been so downhearted that she’d merely taken a shower and then climbed into bed.
But now, with a little time on her hands and the computer in her lap, her thoughts centered on the name that had been stirring her brain since she heard it yesterday afternoon.
Before she could change her mind, she quickly typed it in the empty field.
Jack Simon.
Positioning the cursor over the search button, she started to begin the exploration into Jack’s past. But then the memory of his statement yesterday caused her to hesitate.
You shouldn’t be afraid of me. If anything, I should be afraid of you.
Why would he be afraid of her? And why shouldn’t she be afraid?
The cursor moved as she pulled her finger away and debated whether she really wanted to know what would come up on the screen. Should she wait to see if Jack divulged his secrets, instead of hunting on her own?
I’m not the only one with a past I can’t forget.
What past couldn’t he forget? And did she have the right to find out, if he didn’t know anything about hers?
Then again, he hadn’t asked.
In any case, Jack Simon was probably a common name and would return a mass of results. How would she know which one had taken residence in the wooded mountains of North Alabama?
She moved the cursor to the end of the text field and added the one additional fact that she knew about the man.
Jack Simon film industry.
Before she could change her mind, she clicked the search button.
As she suspected, a bounty of results filled the page, but all of the articles and images weren’t about an abundance of men named Jack Simon. On the contrary, every story and each photo showcased one particular man. The one who lived at the end of the trail. The one who had been so kind to Cody. And the one who had touched Elise’s heart.
No wonder his name had sounded familiar.
Jack Simon. He was the Jack Simon. Why hadn’t it clicked before? Director of the first two Christian full-length films to hit number one in box office sales. Jacob’s Dream and The Journey, two brilliantly produced, beautifully themed and spiritually moving films that had undeniably soothed Elise’s troubled soul during one of the toughest times in her life.
He was Director Jack Simon.
I worked in the film industry.
That was how he described his previous work? Talk about an understatement.
Why would a man with that kind of notoriety choose to live his life in seclusion?
After the first two links, Images of Jack Simon composed one section of the page. Elise scanned the square blocks of pictures.
The first photograph showed a professional head shot of Jack with his hair spiked and messy but with precision perfection. A light five o’clock shadow spotlighted that strong jawline and made him look even more rugged than the full beard he’d sported the first day they’d met.
He looked like a guy who could be in movies, but the posters behind him didn’t showcase him as the star; they displayed the actors of Jacob’s Dream and The Journey.
Jack Simon. How had she forgotten the name? Or what had happened to the famous director’s family?
She scrolled through photo after photo, each one punching her stomach a little harder. Jack on his own as a young, aspiring producer. He’d worked on a few television films and then tried his hand at his true love, directing Christian movies for the big screen.
Beneath one of the photos, a quote from Jack read, “I want the world to see the difference God can make in a regular person’s life. That’s my goal. That’s my dream. That’s what I want to portray on-screen. If I’ve done that, I’ve done what He created me to do.”
Elise studied the photograph. There was something different about Jack in the photo, beyond the fact that he was in his early twenties and that, based on the information on one of the links, he was now thirty-two. Something more than the spiked hair and the five o’clock shadow.
And then she had it.
His eyes were alight with happiness, with hope, with dreams for the future.
The eyes that had captured her attention since that first day were the same unique hue, but nowadays they were guarded, cautious and often filled with an aching sadness Elise didn’t understand.
Until now.
She moved past the individual photographs to the family photos. Almost all were taken on a red carpet, but none of them looked like traditional red-carpet pictures, where those photographed appeared in a textbook pose, like something they’d perfected in a mirror before arriving. Quite the opposite, Jack and his family appeared as if they were simply having fun, and a camera caught the action.
In the first photo, a young boy, probably around eight years old, had dressed identically to his father and even had his hair spiked in the same perfectly messy style. A pair of little girls wore matching baby blue dresses, and they obviously wanted the photographer to notice their glittery red slippers, because one held her foot in front of her and the other pointed to her shoe.
And the wife. She had one hand on Jack’s chest, and the other at her heart as she leaned her head back with an obvious bout of laughter.
“Oh, Jack,” Elise whispered, “your family is so beautiful.”
Then she moved to the next group photo, this one similar to the first, except the children were older. The boy grinned broadly, with deep dimples accenting his smile, and the girls were laughing, their arms wrapped around each other as they doubled over with giggles. She read the identifier above the image. Director Jack Simon and family: wife, Laney, twin daughters, AmyJo and Sadie, and son, Jack Junior (JJ).
“JJ.” Elise had been so concerned when Jack called Cody by the wrong name. “Oh, Jack, I’m so sorry.” The boy favored his father, with the same hair and exquisite green eyes, but he had his mother’s wide smile and deep dimples.
Then Elise drew her attention to Jack’s wife, Laney. She hadn’t seen the woman’s face fully in the other photo, since she’d had her head tilted back, but she viewed Laney clearly now...as she gazed adoringly at Jack. He returned the gesture, so that the two of them could have been the final scene of a movie. Specifically, a romantic film that provided a picture-perfect happy ending for a guy who had to be one of the most handsome men Elise had ever seen...and a woman who complemented her husband beautifully in a golden-yellow evening gown next to his dreamy black tux.
“Jack. Look at you. You were so in love, and so was she.”
But then the very next photo showed the portion of the man’s story that Elise remembered hearing in the news. “Oh, Jack...”
The aerial image showed a demolished plane toss
ed across a large field like a jigsaw puzzle with missing pieces. Elise remembered seeing the photo before. It bothered her then, because she felt sorry for the renowned Christian director who had done so much to depict his faith on the big screen. But now that she knew the man, she felt so much more, and her heart ached painfully for Jack.
“Why, God?” She wiped tears from her cheeks and moved her hand to her mouth as she read the caption. Director Jack Simon was already in LA for the premiere of The Journey when the plane carrying his wife, Laney, twin daughters, AmyJo and Sadie, and son, Jack Junior (JJ), crashed in an open field. There were no survivors.
Not wanting to see the next photos, probably Jack at the funeral, Elise scrolled past the line of images and scanned the titles of the remaining articles. The last link pointed to a blog post from yesterday, by one of the more popular Hollywood entertainment magazines, and the caption mentioned the delayed release of Jack Simon’s most recent movie, Finding Home.
Elise clicked on the headline to read the full story.
Damascus Entertainment is billing Finding Home as Jack Simon’s most extraordinary film to date. However, industry insiders are still holding their breath to see if the studio will delay its release once again, due to the withdrawal of director Jack Simon from all forms of promotion...and perhaps production. Some have said the renowned director didn’t oversee the final scenes, but the studio has denied that rumor, saying the film is an authentic Jack Simon production from the first frame to the last.
Set to release last November, merely one year after the death of Simon’s family on their way to the premiere of The Journey, Finding Home’s release was postponed over a year, with a current release date of this Christmas Day. As much as every Christian wants to see Jack Simon succeed—moreover, as much as every Christian moviegoer wants to see Finding Home—this blogger is uncertain whether the reported last film made by the man who so boldly proclaimed his faith on the big screen...will ever see the light of day.
The pieces of Jack’s confusing conversations clicked into place, and Elise replayed the one that now made the most sense.
Second Chance Father Page 9