Well, since then. For two weeks that smile was my favorite thing on the planet. I’d known it wouldn’t last. I’d known it wasn’t just for me. But I’d let myself pretend, and sometimes pretending is good enough. It’s better than enough because there’s none of the inevitable downsides that come with the real deal.
I hadn’t seen that smile aimed in my direction in two years and the sight of it now, all sudden and unexpected…
I flailed.
“What did you—why—what—?” My arms knocked over the clipboard that some fool had set beside me on the edge of the stage.
Before I could pick it up, Jax was ducking down and snagging it. He handed it over with a satisfied grin.
Now that smile I knew well.
Cocky and assured, just like Jax. I was used to seeing this smile in the hall. Again, not aimed at me. I’d been invisible to this guy for years now, but at least this smile didn’t set off alarm bells.
I took back the clipboard with some semblance of grace, thank goodness.
“I’m giving Simone a ride home, I thought you might need a ride too since I didn’t see your car in the lot.”
I frowned. He knew my car? He’d been looking for my car?
What was going on here? I took a step back. “Uh, no, thanks. My friend is giving me a ride.”
“I could save your friend the trouble.” His gaze was fixed on mine and I had this horrible sensation of being in the crosshairs of a predator.
One thing I’d learned about Jax back in the day? He wasn’t what he pretended to be. Everyone else might buy his whole laid-back rocker guy image, but I knew better. I’d gotten an inside peek at the real guy behind the smirk, and let me tell you…he was intense.
He had a tension inside him that he hid well, but it was there. A live wire that when exposed made him practically vibrate with this intensity.
I sensed it now.
It was determination or drive or passion or…oh, who knew what it was fueled by. All that mattered was that it was there, and I could feel it and it was…terrifying.
I took another step back and gave myself a mental eye roll.
Jax Hadley was not terrifying. He was just a guy. And right now?
He was a guy with an agenda.
I shifted and made myself relax, taking a deep breath to get a freakin’ grip. “What’s with the sudden interest, Jax?”
He blinked but his smile never faltered. “What do you mean?”
“I mean, first you’re offering to be my knight in shining armor and now you’re offering me a ride home…”
His grin spread and holy freakin’ crap—how had I forgotten those dimples?
I blinked rapidly as my brain threatened to go on the fritz. Had I ever seen those dimples?
I didn’t think so.
Where the heck had he been hiding those when we were dating? I’d been cheated out of freakin’ dimples!
“Is it so wrong that I might want to help out a beautiful girl?” he teased.
He teased. That alone would have had those alarm bells ringing again, but it was that false note in his voice that had my gut sinking.
The guy might have been a hottie, but he was no actor.
Absolutely nothing about this moment rang true.
I resisted the urge to sneer in the face of his fake concern. If he’d begrudgingly offered me a ride I might have bought it but this…? He was up to something.
And I wanted to know what.
I eyed him, taking in his stance—the way he was leaning toward me ever so slightly. With heels, I stood eye to eye with him, and he was so close I could feel his breath on my cheek. He was moving ever closer, making this feel intimate and cozy.
I recoiled. “I’ll wait for Hannah, thanks.”
That stopped him from moving in any closer. “You sure?”
I nodded. “Thanks for the offer, though.”
He started walking backwards, his eyes glinting with warmth and humor and…
Gah! Sexiness. The guy exuded sexiness, which was a talent, in and of itself.
“See you around, Rose.” He winked. The rebel without a cause winked! What the ever-loving—
“Wait!” I called out.
He turned back and—that smirk. I was torn between wanting to smack it off his face and wanting to kiss him until he forgot his own name.
I blinked stupidly at the thought. No, you dope. You do not want to kiss this smug jerk.
He cocked his head to the side. “Change your mind?”
I shook my head as I sought out the mousy girl who seemed to be hiding behind him. “I just wanted a word with Simone before you both leave.”
Simone’s eyes widened. “Me?”
I nodded, thinking quick. “I need your input on the art budget.” I gave Jax my best ingratiating smile. He wanted a damsel in distress? Sure thing, buddy. Here she is. I fluttered my lashes with a coy smile. “You don’t mind waiting, do you?”
Smug didn’t begin to cover it. That slow lopsided grin was filled with so much satisfaction it made me sick. “Not at all.” He glanced over at his friend. “I’ll be in the lobby.”
Simone nodded and we both watched him leave before she turned to me with wide expectant eyes.
“What is his deal?” I demanded. I’d dropped any pretense of being coy and sweet and Simone’s head jerked back in surprise at the sudden change.
Hellooo. Actress here. Deal with it.
I crossed my arms and watched her squirm.
“I, uh…I don’t know…”
“Of course you do.” I glared at her. “Don’t play dumb with me. We might not be friends, but we’ve worked on enough shows together that I know you’re not an idiot. You’re a talented artist and you’re in all the AP classes—”
“Um, thank you?”
“So do not pretend you don’t know what I’m talking about.” I nodded toward the door where Jax just left. “He’s up to something.”
She opened her mouth as if to protest but I didn’t give her the chance.
“He’s being super obvious so don’t bother denying it.”
Her mouth clamped shut. After a moment of silence, she sighed wearily. “He is being super obvious, isn’t he?”
It was a rhetorical question so I stayed silent and let her stew. I watched her chew on her lower lip as she seemed to think something over. Finally, she sighed. “Okay, fine. He’s going to kill me, but I told him from the start that I didn’t approve so he’ll just have to deal with it.”
My whole body tensed as I waited for a blow. “You didn’t approve of what, Simone?”
She took a deep breath and met my gaze evenly. “Ryan bet Jax that he couldn’t get you to date him for more than two weeks.”
My insides felt hollow, but I managed to keep my expression even as I stared back at her. The blow felt like a sucker punch and it left me winded.
It left me sick.
I had to swallow to keep from gagging on bitter bile.
Making bets about me? Trying to trick me into liking him? That was just so…so…mean.
I never deluded myself into thinking Jax liked me all that much after I’d ended things, but I never thought…I never imagined…
I swallowed again, my gaze dropping to the floor.
I never thought he hated me.
Simone reached a hand out and dropped it before she could touch me. “Are you all right?”
I nodded. Of course I was all right. I now knew the truth, and it wasn’t like I’d had any great friendship with Jax that could be ruined. My feelings were a little hurt, that was all, but what a great reminder of what high school boys were all about, right?
This right here?
An excellent reminder of why I never dated for real. I could only imagine how I would have felt if I’d actually liked Jax. If I’d honestly had feelings for him.
I would have been gutted.
I would have been heartbroken.
Something Lola had said at the scholarship meeting in August came back to me. Boys w
ere a distraction. They were nothing but a distraction. Relationships—real relationships—were just something that would stand in the way of my career.
“Rose, I’m so sorry,” Simone said quickly, her voice low and quiet and filled with urgency. “I should never have told you and I—”
“No,” I cut her off. “You absolutely should have told me. I’m glad you did.”
And I was glad to hear that my voice sounded even. Totally unconcerned, even. None of that gutted, hurt sensation had crept into my voice and I even managed a smile. “I’m really glad you did. Thank you, Simone.”
She took a deep breath, but she still looked wary. “I’ll tell Jax that you know so he should just—”
“Don’t you dare.” I tried to soften the harsh words with a grin. “I just mean…please don’t.”
Her eyes widened. “But—”
“Please, Simone.” I reached out and clasped her hands in mine, making her wide eyes widen even more at my sudden urgency.
But honestly, now that I knew the truth, I knew exactly what I had to do. It was a no brainer. “Let me teach him a lesson.”
We stood there staring at each other for a long moment as Simone thought it over. “I don’t know,” she finally said. “He’s not a bad guy, he’s just…” She shrugged with a little grimace. “He’s just a guy.”
Despite everything, I laughed. “Yeah, well—guy or not, he doesn’t get to hurt me.”
She nodded but as she walked away, I realized she hadn’t promised not to tell him I knew.
But then again—she hadn’t said she would either.
A slow smile tugged at my lips as I thought about how to get my revenge. The player of Lakeview High wanted to play games?
Well then…game on.
7
Two Years Ago: The First Kiss
Jax
You’re the one that I want…
The movie sucked. Her mom was just plain terrible. And the music assaulting my ears right now was enough to make my ears bleed.
And yet…this might have been the best night of my life.
Rose was cuddled up against me, my arm around her shoulders in the dark living room. Her mom had finally left us alone—according to Rose, she’d left for the night and wouldn’t be back until late or maybe even the next morning.
We were alone. And Rose was in my arms. And I was…happy.
Happier than I’d ever been. We’d been laughing and talking all night. I’d hooked up with girls before, but I’d never hung out with one before. Not like this. It was like hanging with a friend, but also not because there was this tension…this excitement.
She made me laugh one second and then stole my breath the next with a flirty look or a subtle touch.
One minute we were talking about music and art and how I’d started learning guitar and how she was hard at work rehearsing for this play, and then the next we were sitting there in this thick silence that was filled with anticipation.
It was a trip. This whole week had been like this. Ever since the party we’d been spending every free moment together and texting or talking on the phone when we were apart. I couldn’t seem to get enough of her and Rose…
Well, she seemed to feel the exact same way.
“So?” she said as she pulled away from me so she could look me in the eyes. “What did you think?”
I grinned down at her because…man, she was so freakin’ pretty. Especially when she looked like this. All excited and passionate and perfect. Her eyes glimmered with that warmth that made me feel ten feet tall even when lounging on her couch. One hand rested on my chest as she leaned over me, waiting for an answer.
“I hated it,” I said honestly. Her eyes widened in surprise but before she could argue or get mad, I tugged on the hand that was holding her away from me and she collapsed against my chest. “But I loved watching it with you.”
That was the truth, and how much I meant it was slightly terrifying. I loved being here with her. I loved holding her and watching her over-the-top reactions to every one of her favorite scenes.
The more I got to know her, the more I realized that everything with Rose was over-the-top. She was bigger than life, on stage and off. She had more energy than anyone I’d ever met and being around her made me feel…alive. Like her energy was contagious and it gave me a crazy rush.
Like right now. Her heart pounded against mine. Her face was inches away. So close I could taste the Diet Dr. Pepper she’d had as a snack and feel her breath on my face.
So beautiful.
So unbelievably amazing. So perfect.
Her lips parted on an inhale as her eyes met mine in the flickering light. I’d kissed girls before. This wasn’t my first time.
But it felt like it.
I’d never been so nervous…or so excited. I reached one hand up and cupped the back of her neck, pulling her in closer until that distance disappeared and her lips were on mine, soft and sweet.
The connection was instant and jarring. Like the world shifted ever so slightly and rearranged itself all in the heartbeat it took for our lips to meet, and cling, and learn each other.
She met my kisses softly at first, our breath mingling as the sound of the movie faded away and the room darkened even more as the credits rolled. The world might as well have stopped turning because this was a moment out of time.
I had no idea how much time passed, because I was lost. This was heaven on earth. The feel of her in my arms, the taste of her on my lips, the sound of her when she made a soft needy sound when the kiss picked up in intensity and urgency.
And then, just like that, the kiss burst into flames. Sweetness was replaced by hunger and we were both panting for air as the embrace took on a life of its own. When she pulled back her eyes were dark, her lids heavy, and she looked as dazed as I felt.
“Whoa,” she whispered.
Whoa, indeed.
She moved back even farther, licking her lips as she struggled to catch her breath. “Are all kisses like that?”
“No,” I started. And then I stared at her in shock as her words registered. “Was that your…I mean… Have you never…?”
She bit her lip, and it wasn’t coy, but nervous. Her gaze wasn’t flirty but insecure.
Vulnerable.
This was a side of Rose I hadn’t seen and it made my heart thump wildly. Painfully.
“That was my first kiss,” she said.
Her first kiss. Suddenly my insides seemed to give way, my stomach was falling as I realized that I was in over my head. The way she was looking at me right now it was…
Perfect.
Terrifying.
Sweet.
Horrifying.
I shifted quickly. “I should probably get going.”
Rose frowned. “You sure?”
I was already on my feet, heading toward the door, my pulse pounding so hard I could barely hear her voice through the roaring in my ears.
She was looking at me like…like this was serious.
I wasn’t ready for serious. I wasn’t sure I’d ever be ready for whatever this was…
And yet, when I turned back, my heart lurched forward at the sight of her with her hair mussed and her lips still wet from that epic kiss. “I’ll call you later?” I said.
She grinned, and the confident, over-the-top Rose was back as she struck a pose and wiggled her fingers in a teasing goodbye. “You better…stud.”
She was quoting the movie and I let out a short laugh that seemed to release all the tension that had just filled the room.
“Goodnight, Rose.”
“Bye, Jax.”
8
Jax
I tapped the steering wheel in time to the music that was blaring from my stereo. I couldn’t stop smiling as I drove us home. Even Simone’s stubborn silence and heavy glare couldn’t interfere with my happiness.
When I couldn’t keep it in any longer, I let out a triumphant laugh. “Did you see the way she looked at me?”
; Simone glared back at me.
I ignored it, shaking my head at the memory. “Man, that had almost been too easy. I mean, the girl got flustered just because I talked to her? And when I got close and gave her the whole ‘I want to help a beautiful girl’ line…?” I grinned over at Simone. “Come on, you got to admit it—I was good.”
She turned her glare to the road. So stubborn, that Simone.
But whatever. Not even Simone could ruin my good mood. I couldn’t shake the image of a flustered Rose.
It was disarmingly…cute.
I was so used to seeing her on her game that catching her off guard felt like Christmas morning as a kid. That first sight of presents under the tree, like you’d just stumbled onto something magic.
Not that Rose was magic—but she was just so phony all the time. Always acting. The diva who was always on. To see a glimpse of anything real was a win.
And she’d been into me. I could tell. I’d seen the way her eyes had darkened when I’d grown close. I’d seen the way her lips had parted when I’d given her the smile that always got me the girl at parties.
Aw yeah.
She’d felt it.
I picked up my drumming tempo as I turned onto our street. This bet was as good as won. I just had to keep this up for a few more weeks. No biggie.
When I pulled up in front of Simone’s house, I realized she hadn’t said a single word the entire ride home. I turned to face her. “Come on, Simone. Don’t be like this.”
She arched her brows. “Like what? A decent human being? Too late. It’s the way I was raised.” Her tone was all prim and prissy. The way she got when she was on her goody-two-shoes high horse.
“Did you see how she responded?” I said. “She’s into me. We’ll have a little fun and then I’ll score some cash. Nobody will get hurt.”
“That’s where you’re wrong,” she snapped. “You don’t know her as well as you think. I did see her. After you left I talked to her and—”
“What did she say?” I interrupted. I couldn’t help it. Honestly, this little game was the most fun I’d had in ages. I’d almost forgotten how much fun it was to flirt with Rose. “Did she talk about me?”
Kissing the Player (The Dangers of Dating a Diva Book 1) Page 7