'Tis liberty alone that gives the flower
Of fleeting life its lustre and perfume,
And we are weeds without it.
Lizzy recalled Lord Blake discussing the merits of Cowper and the hidden messages found within the words. Strange, he gave me a book of poems expressing veiled political thoughts. I had expected something that was of less sense and of more sensibility.
She flipped the pages back to the beginning of the book.
'Tis morning; and the sun, with ruddy orb
Ascending, fires th' horizon: while the clouds,
That crowd away before the driving wind,
More ardent as the disk emerges more,
Ardent? Elizabeth wished she could cover her ears as his words bellowed within her head. I ardently admire and love you.
Unable to shush the voice in her head, Lizzy slammed the book closed and returned it to her lap; however, the letter’s edge poked out, teasing her with an appeal for another reading. This week she did little else but read it. She sent a message to her young companion she no longer welcomed any more chit-chat. The quiet in the carriage gave her an opportunity to revisit their conversation; no, their debate; no, their venomous argument.
Who is this man who has no shame for separating Jane and Mr. Bingley? He rejoiced, yes, rejoiced in the effort. Colonel Fitzwilliam called it his triumph? She pressed her lips together to hold captive her disgust. I doubt he is rejoicing today at his brilliant offer of… Lizzy sighed. Marriage to me? In love with me all this time? Why I am merely tolerable!
The clicking noise made by the horse hooves filled the carriage. Maria had nodded off with a small smile on her face. Elizabeth’s mouth had turned downward when she recalled more of his words.
Your family is inferior! She scrunched up her face. Inferior? What did he say? ‘Inferior to any with which I would be expected to seek a connection.’ She sighed again.. He spoke the truth; even I did not expect him to lower himself to my level. I am not of his circle.
She recalled an offer within his proposal when he said, ‘I would accept the consequences by seeking you out.’ Yes, she agreed that Lady Catherine deBough would be seriously displeased. Lizzy chuckled at her vision of the older lady ranting. I suppose that would explain why my family would not be included in Fitzwilliam family gatherings, but I do not know if those family gatherings were the only ones he meant. But if he were allowed to attend, my father would be amused with their condescending nature; why else would he want to come?”
She could not control the shudder and her embarrassment with every remembrance whenever Mr. Darcy was in her family’s company. Why can they not all be as gracious as Jane? When she recalled her sister’s calm, unemotional expression, she fidgeted in her seat. The beating of her heart raced. Why did Mr. Darcy think Jane did not have feelings for Mr. Bingley? Insufferable man! Just as quickly, Charlotte’s voice whispered to her, She should show more affection than she feels.
Understanding that to be true, she attempted to rationalize her sister’s mask of indifference even though she knew Jane felt greatly for Mr. Bingley, until Charlotte’s other suggestion caused her to bolt upright.
‘There are a few of us who have heart enough to be really in love without encouragement.’
She tapped her forehead with her handkerchief. Apparently, Mr. Bingley does not have heart enough, sadly; however, it appears that Mr. Darcy does. I never encouraged him.
Suddenly her mind focused on another man. How big is Lord Blake’s heart? Lizzy whispered, “Mama!” She shook her head. Why would she tell such a falsehood? She wanted the connection! I do not believe this is true.
I long to be curled up in the chair in Papa’s library, reading…She gently shook her head. Oh my. I was wrong to accuse Mr. Darcy of mockery over the gas lighting book request.
Lizzy attempted to nap a little before reaching London. The proposal whirled in her mind as she argued, debated, and even chided the condescending attitude of the man expecting a positive response. Silently, she felt her own remorse for the tone and demeanor for every word she had spoken; that is until she heard him say in a defiant timbre in his voice, ‘Your Uncle Gardiner is the dishonest one!’ She stiffened at his words. I will tell Uncle tonight about his accusation, and I will not conceal how I despise Mr. Darcy for speaking so. He will know what to do to correct this falsehood. This cannot stand.
She remained distressed even after she arrived in London and greeted her uncle. Her stay would be brief and she worried if she would be able to speak to him. Later that night she snuck into the kitchen and caught him devouring a late night treat. She shared a full accounting of the accusation about his dishonesty alleged by Mr. Darcy. She did not mention that she made the accusation during his proposal.
“Are you going to hate me too?” Mr. Gardiner cut a piece of cake, placed it on a plate, and handed it to her. He noted her unusually incensed tone when she spoke. “Lizzy?”
“Why would I hate you? I have no reason to find fault with you. I cannot tolerate Mr. Darcy. You did nothing to cause alarm.”
“What I did was worse.”
“I do not believe you. No one could have behaved worse than he did.” When her uncle shook his head, she whispered, “You do not agree?”
“No, I do not. You are angry that he thought ill of me and said so aloud. I do not know exactly who gave him this accounting of me, but I do know Mr. Cuffage. He is deceitful and cunning. He can convince anyone of his goodness, as I discovered much to my own chagrin.”
“But you did not know his evil ways.”
“Did Mr. Darcy? You have spoken forcibly against the young man, wrongly, in my opinion. Mr. Darcy remained loyal to a man someone in his confidence had recommended. Should your anger be directed more towards the man who gave the recommendation?”
“That person should not go unpunished, but then neither should Mr. Darcy be free to repeat what he does not personally know to be true.”
“So then you agree what I did was worse.”
“No! What did you do that was dishonest?”
“Not dishonest, Elizabeth. I was careless with another man’s money. Your father trusted me, and I recommended and encouraged him to invest his daughters’ money. I convinced him that Mr. Cuffage was worthy; I never properly checked him out. Only after it was too late did I discover the real Mr. Cuffage. Do you not understand?”
Elizabeth shook her head. “Mr. Darcy acted worse. He spoke dishonabley about you, an honorable man. And when I informed him of the truth, he refused to listen.”
“Do not forget Mr. Darcy has many friends dependent upon his decisions. They trusted him, and he could not take any chances. If it had been me, I would not have listened to you either, preferring to accept the word of men who are paid to know these things.”
“Oh, but…” She lowered her head. “My word should have held sufficient weight. He was… still, I do not understand.”
“Since Mr. Darcy had been informed that I had a bad reputation, he rightfully chose not to put his friends in jeopardy. When you are the one in charge, you cannot afford careless mistakes. Now should he have investigated me? Who is to say he did not. I will tell you a secret revealed only to the partners, but I must tell you in order for you to understand. Mr. Cuffage’s son was Mr. Darcy’s secretary—the two men used different names purposely to deceive the world at large, and Mr. Darcy in particular.”
“Oh my! Is this the man that spoke ill of you?”
“I do not know, but I do suspect it was him.”
Lizzy sat for a full minute biting her lower lip while she contemplated what her uncle revealed. The two of them finished their sweet treat in silence until Mr. Gardiner patted his niece’s hand.
“I am not angry, Lizzy. Neither should you be.”
Sighing, Lizzy gazed at her uncle. “When you explain it in that light, I will acknowledge there is merit to his opinions. Even though, he should not have called you dishonest.”
“Now, my child. Mr. Darcy’s o
nly failing was once he made up his mind, it was made up forever. You have said even he recognizes that as a failing of his. I think he has had to rethink that trait, do you not agree? Elizabeth, he was merely loyal to his friends. In fact, he seems to be one of the most loyal men I have ever met.”
“Perhaps in business.”
“One more argument—”
“Yes.”
“Mr. Darcy has invited me to be a full partner in his alliance. Would he do that if he were not sincerely sorry for his disrespect?
“A partner?”
“Oh, yes. A full partner. I am to be treated as an equal. It will be a rich association, too. I cannot believe my great fortune to be so closely connected to the Kent family and to The Heir himself!”
While finishing their cake, Mr. Gardiner revealed how the young men had formed an alliance while staying at Netherfield Park. He described the other alliance, the one that had been in place for hundreds of years. But he caught Lizzy’s interest when he explained that three of the men were forced to choose between the two groups. Mr. Darcy and Mr. Rawlings turned away from their families and stood by the men of trade and science. Lord Blake chose neither group and at the same time broke all connections with Mr. Darcy.
Elizabeth kept her gaze down on her plate when her uncle discussed Lord Blake’s decision. She felt the flush rising on her cheeks, and did not regain her composure until he patted her hand. She looked up at him. “I am astonished. I am happy for you. Still, my father’s—”
“Mr. Murdoch, owner of the Gas Light Company, will be joining us for dinner tonight. He has worked out a plan to secure your father’s funds.”
“He should!”
“My dear, Lizzy. You must not be so harsh. Mr. Darcy’s alliance has offered to assist Mr. Murdoch in the advancement of his gas lighting endeavors. Can you not guess now who actually was behind the scheme to recover your dowry?
“Mr. Darcy?”
“Yes. He felt a sense of obligation.”
Elizabeth scoffed. “Why. This did not happen because of him.”
“But Mr. Cuffage and his son worked for Mr. Darcy’s great uncle, Lord Winthrop, who was the mastermind behind the whole plot.”
“Oh my! Did Mr. Darcy know?”
“No, and not only did he not know about this, his great uncle pursued every avenue to destroy his alliance. It seems he wanted him to work for his venture; one with only the highest ranking of men as partners; a group I would never be allowed to join.”
“His own relative deceiving him! I must think for a while. This is just too much for me to digest.”
Do not take too long. Miss Darcy has invited you, Jane, and my wife to tea tomorrow.”
“No!”
“I will be leaving for Birmingham tomorrow, along with the other partners of this new alliance. Our ladies will spend time together while we are gone, and that includes you! I demand it. I believe Mr. Darcy asked specifically that you be included. He mentioned how much he desired that you meet his sister.”
***
While Mrs. Gardiner, Jane, and Elizabeth climbed the front steps of Darcy House, Elizabeth took in its grace and beauty. The limestone and terra cotta brick building seemed immense compared to other houses on the square, but not in any showy ornate way. The doorman appeared and acted exactly as she assumed any a servant a gentleman of great wealth would. But when she stepped inside, she could barely control her admiration. The spacious lobby was lofty and handsome, with furniture neither gaudy nor uselessly fine. She decided she preferred this man’s interpretation of elegance.
Miss Darcy approached the ladies, proper introductions and civilities were made. While they climbed the stairs to the great room, Elizabeth studied the young girl, and five minutes had not passed before she realized the girl was shy and not haughty. Another lie told by Mr. Wickham. She gasped when she realized what could have happened to such a sweet young girl, and felt anger towards the man she previously had admired. Wickham was not gentleman-like at all!
“Elizabeth, are you well? You look pale.” Jane took her sister’s hand in hers.
“I am well... I have a sudden headache. I merely need to rest a moment.”
Mrs. Annesley tapped Georgiana’s arm, and she, in turn, stepped closer to Elizabeth. “Let me show you to a room close to where we will be. It has a comfortable chair and a warm fire. I will send for wine.” She led Elizabeth to a small room. “Would you like your aunt or sister to stay with you?”
“Thank you, but no. I will be fine. I just need a few moments of quietness.”
She stepped into the room and took in its beauty. The furnishings were bright and the walls painted in a pale yellow. The furniture’s blue and yellow silk upholstery gleamed in the sunlight. The tables held beautiful crafted sculptured pieces and small items made of crystal. A timepiece ticked away on the mantle, also crystal. A fire had been lit, not too high but enough to give the room a cozy feeling. Books lined a small bookcase, and on the desk lay the most unusual writing instrument she had ever seen.
Fascinated, she moved to the desk and placed the object in her fingers as if she was going to write a letter.
Miss Darcy joined her. “That is a steel dip pen. They are new. Have you ever used one before?”
“No. This surely must save mending.”
“Yes, my brother insisted all our quills be replaced with these pens. Mr. Kent brought them back from one of his journeys north to Birmingham.” Georgiana retrieved paper from the drawer and opened the ink well. “Try it. It is wonderful.”
Elizabeth dipped the pen slowly before writing her name on the paper. “It is smooth. I like it very much.”
“My brother suggested that the inventor find a way to add the ink in a container right on the pen. No dipping, he says! I laughed and teased him about being lazy! What is so hard about dipping your pen?” The two girls laughed, but Elizabeth studied the pen for such an opportunity.
Georgiana led Elizabeth to a comfortable looking chair, just as a servant entered carrying a glass of wine on her tray.
With her guest seated and sipping her wine, Georgina moved to the door. “I must return to my other guests, but I will come back shortly. Or you may join us when you are rested.” Georgiana pointed to the connecting door with her head.
When Elizabeth attempted to rise, the young mistress motioned for her to remain seated. “My brother will be distressed if you were not cared for in his home. He is the best of brothers. He had this room done up just for me after I remarked how much I enjoyed the morning sun in here. He suggested pale yellow as the color. He said it reminded him of a dance, and that it has become his favorite hue. He comes here often to sit and think. He closes his eyes and a smile appears.”
“He is certainly a good brother.” Elizabeth felt the heat rising on her neck and cheeks.
“And this is always the way with him,” she paused as she tried to conceal the smile from forming when she spotted the blush on her guest’s face. “Whatever he can do to give me pleasure, he does in a moment. There is nothing he would not do for me or anyone he admires, and I love him for that.”
“And I am sure he loves you. I never had a brother, only four sisters. I am quite jealous of you now.”
“I would have liked a sister.”
“Be careful in your wishes. Some sisters are silly girls and are always taking your things.” Smiling, Elizabeth took another sip and leaned back, snuggling in the cushion. “I will be better after a short rest. I will join you soon.”
A World of Expectations_Book 2_The Confrontation Page 36