by Freya Barker
My fist is moving at lightning speed, and I have to bite my lip to keep from yelling out when I come hard over my hand and belly. I tug off my shirt and wipe my hand and my stomach, as I watch her shadow move and disappear into the house.
The last thing I hear is the click of her door.
ELEVEN
Mia
I force my eyes open, blinking at the bright sun streaming in, and notice the banging is not part of my dream. There’s someone at the door.
Scrambling out of bed, I locate my comfy, flannel PJ pants I’d kicked off in the middle of the night, and quickly tug them on. A quick glance at the clock on my nightstand stops me in my tracks. It’s fucking eleven o’clock? Sleeping in for me is eight, tops. Granted, just as I watched the sun go down last night, I watched it come up early this morning as well, before finally falling into a restless sleep, but dammit, I hate sleeping the day away.
I’m out of sorts, and it doesn’t even occur to me to wonder who is at the door until I yank it open, still rubbing the sleep from my eyes.
“Long night?”
If not his suggestive words, the sound of his voice is enough to send a charge through my body. Straight between my legs. I gingerly lift my hand away from my reddening face and my eyes travel up his body. I can’t help it. They get caught on his crotch. That part of his anatomy I’ve been able to ogle from afar twice now.
But that’s not even the most embarrassing part. That would be his clear indication he knows I was watching, and he is clearly calling me on it.
“No air conditioning,” I evade, not yet able to look him in the eye, so mine are stuck straight ahead, where his V-neck T-shirt shows the hair on his chest. “Took a while for the night to cool off.”
I immediately realize the mistake when he chuckles at my unintentional innuendo.
“It sure did. Didn’t it?” he teases.
It fires up a hefty dose of indignant anger, since he was the one who cranked up that heat in the first place. I squint my eyes, pissed off enough to finally lift them to his face. The smug smile there only stokes the fire.
“You’re an ass, you know that? A gentleman wouldn’t whip his...his thing out in public.”
“Thing?” he retorts, lifting an eyebrow. “You mean my cock? If I recall, there wasn’t a single part of you covered when you decided to parade your naked ass in front of me. Come on now, Mia.”
The heat of embarrassment wins out. I’m pretty sure I’m beet red from my hairline down to my toes. He’s right; at least partially. Skinny-dipping, when the nights get too hot for me to sleep, is something I do occasionally to cool off. I didn’t go down to the water in just a towel for his sake, but I can’t deny the remotest possibility he might see me had occurred to me. It wasn’t until I turned back to the shore that I’d noticed him sitting in that chair again—facing me. I had a choice; I could scurry back on land, cover myself quickly, and rush inside to hide, or...I could pretend I never saw him. I opted for the latter, although my body was shaking as I pulled myself out of the water, exposing myself completely. There’d been something liberating about it.
“I didn’t...” I barely have the beginnings of a lame excuse out of my mouth when his hand comes up and his fingers cover my lips.
“Don’t,” he threatens. “Don’t make excuses, don’t apologize—I sure won’t.” He takes a step closer, making me painfully aware of the ratty old men’s undershirt and PJs I’m wearing. Not to mention the state of my hair, which most mornings resembles a bird’s nest, or the brutal morning breath I’m sure I’m sporting. “I knew you were there. I could feel your eyes on me earlier in the evening, too. I was tempted then, but then I saw you sliding through the water...” he trails off, shaking his head. “When I heard you come out on the porch, I knew you’d seen me out there. I liked it. I like the idea of you watching me.” I push back on his chest abruptly and walk back inside, feeling completely overwhelmed and not just a little turned on.
“What do you want, Jared” I bite off over my shoulder, desperate to change the topic. I’m not surprised to see he’s followed me inside. He looks even bigger, standing in my living room, looking around.
“Why are you here?” I prompt, when he bends down to scratch Griffin behind the ears. Some watchdog, he never even left his bed at the banging on the door.
I try not to appreciate the view when Jared straightens up, rubbing his hands on his legs. He’s nervous. The realization is oddly calming.
“Actually,” he starts, with a crooked smile and a casual shrug of his shoulders. “Jordy’s been bugging me. She has some friends coming up from Toronto today, to meet the baby, and this morning some of my friends announced they plan to come up as well. Looks like it’ll be a crowd. We’ll be having some drinks, firing up the BBQ, and wanted to see if you’d like to join us.”
There’s so much I’m getting out of that invitation, but what stands out most is the almost reluctance in its delivery. It makes my answer easier.
“Thanks for the invite, but I have a lot of work to catch up on. I think I’ll pass.”
Jared nods, apparently not surprised by my answer at all and almost resigned. With a few steps, he closes the distance between us and reaches out with his hand to brush a stray curl from my face. His eyes follow the movement intimately, making me squirm a little.
“That’s what I told Jordy you’d say,” he says, before he completely throws me off by pressing a kiss to my forehead, and turning for the door.
It takes me a minute to register that he’s being awfully presumptuous to think he knows me so well. I almost call after him that I’ve changed my mind, but I let him walk out without opening my mouth.
-
I hate to admit I regret that decision five hours later.
I did everything to distract myself; had a long shower, cleaned my bed linens, took the dog for a long hike, finished my edits and sent them off, and I’ve just turned the burner down to let the ratatouille I finally got around to simmer. Unable to ignore the stifling heat of the cottage or the sounds coming from the lake, I finally step out onto my porch.
The sound of revving boats, screams of excitement and water splashing is much louder out here. People are out in full force, enjoying the water in this heat, and I have to say I’m tempted to join them. Not that I will. One glance across to my neighbour’s dock cures me on the spot.
The first person I spot is Jared, in only board shorts, manning a smoking grill. There are two more guys, similarly attired, with beers in hand, hovering over his shoulder. Probably telling him how to properly cook the meat, since I’ve learned every man is an expert when it comes to grilling. Jordy is easy to spot, lounging on one of the chairs. She’s the only one with dark hair, and something more than just a few scraps of fabric covering her body. The others? Jesus, they look like they came straight from a Barbie convention: tall, slim, blonde, stacked, and wearing impossibly tiny bikinis, all three of them.
Yeah...so not my style.
Even if my skin didn’t crawl at the thought of being stuck in a crowd of people I don’t know, I’d still rather be sitting here, in the safety of my porch, wearing my slouchy cutoffs and tank. Not a bikini kind of girl, more of a utilitarian Speedo suit person.
I quietly sip my iced tea and observe, pretending my eyes don’t slide over in Jared’s direction more than is probably healthy. I therefore don’t miss Red Barbie getting up from a lounger, sticking her feet in what look to be colour coordinated mules—I kid you not—and sway her way over to the BBQ. Part of me wishes her silly heels get stuck in the deck boards, and I’m almost disappointed when she makes it to the men, without at least stumbling awkwardly.
I really, really hope she’s with one of the two guys, but when she saunters up behind Jared and slips her arms around his waist, splaying her hands on his abs, it’s clear who she has her claws into.
I don’t allow myself to feel anything but resignation. I knew he was a player, and just because he chose to play with me a little, when th
ere weren’t any other distractions around, doesn’t make him any less of one.
Without giving the scene another look, I resolutely grab my glass, my book, and head inside to check on my stew.
Jared
“Hey, handsome. How’s your meat?”
I feel Tina’s hands move lower on my stomach and have to fight not to stick her with my meat fork. Brian and Phil chuckle at her very obvious, and frankly, unattractively crass, come on. As I feared, she’s been on my case since she got here earlier. Jordy’s tried to quietly intervene on my behalf a few times, but Tina has her head too far up her own ass to recognize rejection, unless it slaps her in the face. That may still happen, if she continues to put her hands on me uninvited. I’ve had enough.
I’ve kept an eye on the screened-in porch across the water, sure that at some point, Mia would take up her favoured spot. She didn’t disappoint, I can feel her eyes on me now. I pushed her earlier, irritated that she suddenly played coy. She’d clearly had a rough night but was apparently more than willing to deny it had anything to do with me. Instead of taking a step back, I took it as a challenge, almost forgetting to deliver Jordy’s invitation; the reason I stopped by in the first place. When Brian called this morning, announcing he wanted to come up with his wife, Sandy, she’d managed to finally convince me it would be rude not to ask Mia as well.
As I expected, it was awkward. Made even more so because I’d just accused her of being a tease, of swimming naked with the sole purpose of getting a rise out of me. Of course she did get a rise out of me, but I don’t really think she went skinny-dipping on my account. Not in the middle of the night.
So it was awkward, she declined, which was no surprise, and I didn’t know how to make it better, so I kissed her forehead. Her fucking forehead, when there clearly are other parts of her I would’ve much rather kissed. I ended up cutting my losses by leaving rather abruptly, cursing myself all the way back here. And of course Mia hid out all day.
Until now, right at the very moment this octopus of a woman has her tentacles wrapped around me.
I put down my fork and grab her firmly by the wrists, pulling her hands away from the danger zone she’s approaching. I let one go and pull her aside by the other. Apparently thinking she’s about to score, her now free hand immediately comes up to toy with my nipple. Sonofabitch, the woman is shameless. I quickly disable both her hands by pulling them behind her, grabbing them both with one hand, while forcing her at a distance by the shoulder. She still thinks I’m playing, judging by the come hither look she sends me with her eyes and the coy lick over her bottom lip.
“Ooo, I like a little play,” she whispers and I repress a shiver.
Oh yeah, time to give it to her straight.
“I’ve tried to be polite because you’re a good friend of my sister’s, but seriously, Tina, this shit has to stop.” I get some satisfaction from the confusion washing over her face, but I need to hammer this shit home, so I lean my face a little closer. “I’ve known you for years. The fact that despite your desperate attempts to get your hands down my pants—regardless of your marital status—I have not ever taken you up on your blatant offer, should tell you something. I am not, nor have I ever been, interested in you in any way other than that you are Jordy’s friend, and I’m forced to tolerate you on occasion. That does not give you permission to put your hands on me. Fuck, woman, if the roles were reversed, you’d be screaming sexual harassment.”
When I see tears pooling in her eyes I immediately regret my harsh words. I’m about to apologize when I see her face steel over and a tight little smirk form on her lips.
“Your loss,” she hisses. “Because trust me, I can do better than washed-up, hockey history. I was just being compassionate, giving you one last go at something spectacular, now that your career has tanked. Call it a pity fuck.” With that, she tosses her hair over her shoulder and struts into my fucking house.
“Ouch,” I hear Brian’s voice behind me, as I watch her slam the door shut, rattling the windows.
Ouch is right. Even though I know she meant to injure to cover her own embarrassment, I can’t deny she managed to find the sorest of spots with alarming accuracy.
A woman scorned and all that.
“Had to be done,” I tell him, turning back to the grill. My eyes find Jordy, whose worried gaze is lingering on the door before she turns to me. I hope my eyes convey my apology. I know she was looking forward to this afternoon, and I’d hate to spoil it with drama, but she easily shrugs her shoulders and mouths, “Oh well.”
Dinner is a casual affair, with paper plates and Tupperware containers, and the massive amounts of food surprisingly disappear in no time. Must be the outdoor air. Afterwards, I suggest a sunset run of the lake, which Tina passes on, offering to stay with Jordy and Ole instead. I’m not arguing. Brian, Sandy, Lesley, and Phil all climb aboard, and we cruise until the sky is almost red with the last remnants of sunlight.
To my knowledge, Mia never took out her kayak or canoe for her daily paddle. By the time everyone leaves for home, and Jordy heads to bed for the night, I find myself once again on my chair at the end of the dock, watching a dark cottage, waiting for any sign of movement.
There’s none.
TWELVE
Mia
It’s Sunday night when my phone rings.
I’ve stuck close to home, spending most of my day cleaning, doing my laundry in the tub, trying not to think about the fully outfitted laundry room I noticed on the other side of the lake. When that was done, I rearranged my bedroom out of boredom, since I was too restless to do any reading. I thought about going out on the lake a few times, but decided against it.
This weekend has been emotionally exhausting. First the sexual tension between Jared and me, building right across the inlet, feeling so tangible, the burn of his eyes felt like fingers stroking my skin. Knowing he had the capacity to arouse me with a few hundred yards, and a body of water separating us, left me questioning my own sanity. I barely had a chance to recover from that encounter when I let him inside my sanctuary, where his words were both a challenge and a caution, and he left me feeling out of sorts. When I finally couldn’t resist a glance across the water, I watched as another woman proprietarily put her hands on him, and I couldn’t watch anymore.
I don’t blame him, oddly enough. I’ve known exactly the kind of man he is from the first time I clapped eyes on him. No, I’m more disgusted with myself. I’d been jealous; an emotion I’d opened myself up to. I let myself spin fantasies around him. Allowed myself to be lured, well outside of my comfort zone, with sexual innuendo and visual stimulation. I needed the distance to sort myself out.
Sleep last night had been no better than the night before, with my mind spinning in every direction and the temperature in my bedroom stifling. I’d ended up on the couch on the screen porch, in an attempt to catch whatever small breeze on my clammy skin. Surprisingly, there hadn’t been any movement from the other side of the bay. None that I’ve seen.
Which is why it shocks me to see Jared’s number on my screen. We’d exchanged numbers at some point, in case of an emergency and in a feeble attempt to keep some distance, I’d entered it as neighbour in my contacts. Like that would make him less real. I consider letting it go to voicemail, but what if something is wrong with the baby?
“Hello,” I finally answer, a little out of breath.
“Mia,” Jared starts, a little abruptly. “Jordy’s been running a fever since last night. She doesn’t want to take anything because she’s nursing, but she’s cold and can’t stop shivering. It’s still fucking thirty degrees out, and she’s curled up under the covers, soaking with sweat.”
I’m already sliding my feet in some flip-flops and slap my thigh to call Griffin, who’s been snoozing in his bed in front of the fireplace. Still he gets to the door before I do.
“On my way. How’s the baby?”
“He’s a bit fussy, but not warm. I’ll turn the outside lights on, and meet yo
u on the path.”
I tuck my phone in my back pocket, grab my flashlight, and head outside. Dusk has set in and the remaining mosquitos, hiding under the cool canopy of the trees, come out in full force, feasting on every sliver of exposed skin. Forgot to spray the damn repellent, I’ll be a pincushion by the time I get there.
I’m slapping at the buzzing cloud when I see Jared approaching from the other side, doing much the same.
“Fuck, they’re thick tonight,” he swears as we close the distance.
“Guess you didn’t spray either?” I state the obvious as we make our way toward his house.
“Didn’t think,” he mumbles, before turning to me. “She says it hurts when she nurses. Wants me to go get some formula. I was going to do that while you’re here. If you don’t mind.”
“Don’t do that yet. Let me have a quick look first.”
He slides open the door and lets Griff and me pass before following in, quickly shutting it before the bugs get in. I head directly to Jordy’s bedroom, quickly peeking inside the nursery to find Ole awake but quiet, so I leave him in his crib for now.
“Hey, honey,” I greet her, when I walk in to find just her hair sticking out from under her duvet. The temperature in the room is nice and cool, but not cold.
“Hey,” she croaks weakly.
“Let me have a look at you,” I suggest, peeling the covers down. Poor girl is drenched, but her teeth are chattering. “Let’s take this off, okay?” I pluck at her wet T-shirt and start pulling it off when I hear Ole start fussing.
“I’ve got him,” Jared’s voice comes from the doorway and seconds later can be heard over the monitor on Jordy’s nightstand.
I don’t need to look far; her right breast is red and swollen. Gentle palpitation with my fingers finds a hard disk under the surface of her skin, close to her breastbone.