by Hicks, I. M.
Love, Robert.”
I put the note in my drawer and looked at Jerry “Give them away, toss them, I don’t care, I don’t want then in my office or anywhere I can see them” I said about the roses.
“You got it darling” he said smiling and left heading straight for the elevator.
The rest of the afternoon went without a hitch, I cleared all my meetings until I had the makeup artist. Jerry found one that would meet me at Victor’s at 7:30 in the morning which was perfect.
After work I asked Phillip to drive me to Pam’s house for a few minutes I felt the need to apologize to her and at the same get the feel from her about Marc.
When I arrived, Marc was already home, his car was there. I knocked on the door and his daughter answered “Mommy and Daddy are mad at each other lex” she said with her cute three year old voice and I loved the fact that she couldn’t pronounce my name. So I picked her up and went inside. Marc and Pam were upstairs yelling at the top of their lungs. “Hello!” I yelled out and they stopped. Marc came down first, he was still wearing his suit from earlier and he had a vile look on his face. He looked at me, walking passed me and went out the back door to light up a cigarette. Pam came down shortly “What the fuck are you doing here Alex?” she asked with hostility which scared me slightly “I um…came to see you Pam, Lucy opened the door” I said. She ignored me and went outside again and left the door open “Why don’t you give these back to that whore!” she yelled throwing something blue on his face “You disgust me, you have three kids and you are fucking another woman” she continued. I started shaking, and my mouth went dry. He wasn’t saying anything, he wasn’t even looking at her. “I knew there was something up when you started working out again, how long have you been fucking her!” she yelled, still no response from him.
“I want you out of here by the end of the week, take all your shit, we’re done” she said. He looked at her at that moment
“I agree, we are done” he said calmly and looked away. She came back in the house cursing under her breath and went straight to the kitchen to start supper, and I didn’t know how to react to any of it. “Sweetheart, why don’t you go play outside for a bit” I told Lucy and she was more than happy to do so. I took a deep breath to calm my nerves and I approached Pam “Do you want to talk about it?” I asked “No Alex I do not want to talk about my cheating, piece of shit husband” she said sternly “Ok well I just came here to apologize for what happened on the weekend, I’m sorry that went down and I’m sorry I got out of hand with you, I was trying to help” I said “I found a pair of ripped panties while I was doing the laundry today, royal blue with black lace, a thong, you know the kind a whore wears, that kind of panty” said Pam looking at me, I swallowed.
“So he’s gone, I’m done with him, I don’t care, he has to pay child support and alimony, it’s the least he can give me after almost 10 years of marriage” she said.
“Is he denying it?” I asked her.
“He didn’t say a word, which just confirms it” she began “I’d love to know where he met her, it’s no one from his office, but whoever she is must have money, she has expensive taste in underwear” she pointed out. She looked at the tag?
“Do you want me to talk to him?”
“What for, he’s not gonna tell you anymore than what he’s told me”
“Well I do have to talk to him and apologize and I’ll leave as soon as I’m done, ok”
“I don’t care you can stay as long as you want”
I grabbed a smoke out of my purse and went outside, he had moved to the other end of the yard where it wasn’t so sunny, I took off my shoes and went to see him.
“How could you be so careless?” I whispered.
“I need to find a place to live” he said.
“Yeah I’m aware of that”
I put the cigarette in my mouth, he lit it and lit another for himself.
“I came over to apologize to her, I didn’t mean to barge in on you two”
“Doesn’t matter, it’s over”
“She’s going after you for alimony as well”
“Fuck” he said shaking his head.
“I saw Rob this afternoon, he wants me to meet him for dinner at 7”
He turned his back away from the house.
“The fuck you are” he said, his voice angry.
“I’m not sure if I will or not”
“Don’t fuck with me Alex, not like this, I can’t handle it”
I knew he was serious by the tone of his voice that me seeing Rob tonight would hurt him greatly.
“Ok, I won’t, I promise”
“Can I come stay with you tonight?” he asked.
“I don’t know, I have to talk to Victor about that”
“Fair enough, please let me know, I’ll be out of there tomorrow before you two wake so I’m not in the way” he said.
“Ok, I’ll text you shortly”
“I love you Alex” he said glancing at me.
“I know, I do too”
I went back to the kitchen where Pam was looking in the yellow pages for a Divorce Lawyer.
“Pam I have to go, I will text you later”
“What did he say?” she asked and I froze.
“He wouldn’t say anything, we talked about the Robert situation mostly”
“I see” “Are you leaving him?”
“I’m not sure”
“Why, how much money do you lose if you divorce him?” she asked with a wry smile.
I flinched at the question and her demeanor, she was evil, so I gave it right back to her to satisfy what she’s been dying to know all these years.
“Not a fucking cent Pam, however I get half what he’s worth if I go after him for abuse, plus we split our assets in half. I would be a billionaire after I’m done with him” I said looking straight into her eyes and her mouth dropped open.
“I gotta go, my car is waiting,” I put my sunglasses back on and left her house, closing the door slightly hard behind me.
I texted Victor from the car.
Me: “Can he stay over tonight?”
Victor: “I’m not a hotel”
Me: “Can you book me one then?”
Victor: “Sure thang, I’ll give you the info when you get here”
I set it up so Phillip had the morning off until I needed him. I figured we could walk to work from the Sheraton where Victor booked us, and I had Jerry tell the makeup artist to meet me at the hotel instead.
I grabbed a change of clothes and a suit for tomorrow, hopped in a cab and made my way to the Sheraton.
When I got there, much to my surprise, Victor had the honeymoon package delivered complete with Champagne, chocolate covered strawberries and some wine and cheese “I owe you Vic” I muttered under my breath.
Shortly after 8 o’clock Marc arrived, with a duffle bag and his suit in a garment bag.
“This is nice” he said putting his stuff down.
“It is, and look what Vic did” I said showing him the spread of food, giggling.
Marc laid down on the bed and turned on the TV, his face was unreadable.
“I would ask you if you’re ok, but I know you’re not” I began.
“Just thinking about things” he said not looking at me while flipping the channels.
“TV wasn’t something I had in mind for tonight”
“I like to watch TV when I get home from work Alex” his voice with slight hostility.
“And I don’t like to be ignored” I retorted showing equal hostility.
“Please don’t start”
“Start what?” I asked.
“Expectations” he sighed
I laughed “Expectations?” I began “I have no expectations, I’m not your wife Marc, I’m your lover and I’m not spending the next two hours watching you watch TV” I began “Besides, this is our first night together” I spoke softly reaching for his hand.
“God dammit Alex!” He said turning the TV off takin
g his hand away from mine.
“Why are you acting like this?” I asked and he closed his eyes.
“This was a mistake” he whispered.
My heart sank dreading what was coming.
“Mistake?” my voice broke slightly.
“You, me, it was all a mistake” he said coldly.
“I see” the lump in my throat was on fire “You don’t love me?”
“No Alex, I don’t love you” he said vacantly staring at the TV
I paced around the room for a while as the words echoed in my head. I looked at him but he couldn’t look at me “You’re lying” I yelled “Why are you doing this Marc!” I was holding back the tears as I stood by the end of the bed in front of him.
“I need to fix this, I need to get my family back Alex” he said looking into my eyes.
“Be careful Marc because I won’t chase you, call or text you, you’ll never see or hear from me again.” I warned.
He sighed “When I left the house today, Lucy was crying because Daddy wasn’t coming back tonight” he began and then looked into my eyes again “You have no idea what that’s like Alex, you don’t have children” he said.
My stomach turned when I heard him say that, my heart broke into a million pieces because I knew it was over. I wanted to cry so badly but held it in, my mouth went dry and my hands shook so I began collecting my things. I hadn’t noticed but he was doing the same.
There was so much I wanted to say to him at that point but I knew it wouldn’t matter. He was leaving no matter what I said.
I called Phillip from my cell phone and asked him to pick me up. Marc left the room quietly without saying goodbye. Once he left, I sat there for the next 20 minutes or so crying my eyes out.
I asked Phillip to take me home. Going back to Victor’s meant talking about it which I was in no mood to do so.
When I finally got home it was close to 9pm. Rob’s Maserati was parked outside next to my car.
He greeted me as soon as I opened the door. He hugged me tightly and kissed my cheek.
“I’m so sorry baby” he whispered “I’m so glad you’re home”
“Me too” I smiled pulling away from him and went upstairs.
I prepared a hot bath and locked the bathroom door to have some peace and quiet.
After I was done, I got ready for bed and I realized I hadn’t eaten anything since the soup and bread I had for lunch. So I went downstairs to grab some left overs if any from the weekend.
“Can I make you something to eat?” asked Rob grabbing my waist from behind me, and I flinched when he touched me.
“Sorry you scared me” I said.
“Look Alexandra, I had my assistant find us couples therapy, there are a few options we can look at and I will be more than happy to do this with you”
“Look Robert” I began and I was livid by this point “I fuck you daily, sometimes two to three times a day, I go along with whatever idea you have, I didn’t complain about the week vacation you booked for us in midst of the Neiman campaign, I make you dinner, I put up with you friends and your mood swings, and you think I need therapy?” I added “Your jealousy and the way you reacted toward me over something so stupid that I have done many times before tells me you need anger management therapy. This shit on my face right here has been humiliating since it happened, today I had to go to work with it, and there’s not a god damn excuse I can make up for it. I have meetings with investors all week, so you know what I had to do? I had to hire a makeup artist. So to answer your question. No, I’m not going to couple’s therapy unless you go to anger management” I said grabbing an apple from the fridge and left him there speechless.
I laid down in bed but I couldn’t sleep, I turned off all the lights and then I heard Rob come upstairs.
I usually went to bed naked but I felt vulnerable, so I put on a tank and panties. He came up and laid down beside me, I had my back to him and I pretended to sleep, I wasn’t in the mood for the wild sex he liked to have with me. I didn’t want him to touch me I just wanted to let him know I was in control and I called the shots. “Can I at least hold you?” he asked, and it was something about his voice that made me realize he knew he was wrong and he was sorry. So I turned around and rested my head on his chest, he put his arm around and caressed my arm. He moved slightly on top of me and began kissing me softly but deeply, very sensual, very caring kisses. We did that for a while until he started putting his hand under my tank and I stopped him “I don’t want to fuck tonight Rob” I warned him “I know baby, I don’t either” he replied.
Tonight he knew what I wanted was love, and that’s exactly what he did, he loved me, gently and slowly until we fell asleep in each other’s arms.
CHAPTER TWELVE
The rest of the week went by fast. Rob and I started to get back in the swing of things again and I had pretty much forgiven him. He found a therapist to deal with his issues and as promised we decided on a therapist for the two of us.
I checked my messages constantly but Marc stopped all communication with me, and I didn’t contact him either.
Pam however did, so I knew what was happening between them either way. I pretended to be happy for her, but based on what I saw in her earlier in the week I decided that I would slowly wean her off me. I wasn’t sharing anything with her anymore or making promises of coming over, because I would never show up there again. Apparently she had decided to give Marc another go, she recognized she was difficult to deal with and although it didn’t grant an excuse for Marc to cheat on her, they had to meet half way. He told her the woman he was with was married, but she was in an unhappy marriage and she wouldn’t let him go, she told him she loved him and he believed her but he then realized that he had more at home with his family and she wasn’t worth it. I wasn’t worth it.
It was Saturday morning and I was getting ready for a jog, Rob was still sleeping. I checked my phone for messages and there were a few from Pam.
Pam: “I’m so happy today, we finally did it last night after almost two weeks!”
Pam: “He gave me oral too, and I was in heaven, he learned a thing or two from that whore he was seeing”
I put the phone down like it was infected with the plague. I felt sick to my stomach. I took a deep breath and then I picked it up again.
Pam: “Why don’t you come over for drinks later?”
Me: “No, I can’t”
Pam: “Tomorrow?”
Me: “Busy with Victor”
Pam: “Well who the fuck is your bff? Me or him?”
Me: “I’m trying to leave the house to go on my jog, I will text you later”
Pam: “Fine fuck you too”
Needless to say I did not text her later, nor was I planning to ever text her again.
That evening Rob took me out for dinner and afterwards we took stroll down through Queens Quay.
We had a come to a full 360 since the previous weekend and I was happy again to be his and only his.
On Sunday Victor and I decided to go shopping. We both needed shopping therapy badly. He was starting his new position the following week and I needed to buy cabana wear for our trip to Cairo in a week’s time plus I was still getting over the heart break, shopping was necessary. So we headed to the Eaton Centre.
“So baby girl, how are things?”
“They’re really good Victor, he’s getting help and so are we?
“Thank god, no more drama. I’m still pissed at Rob for what he did, but he is your husband and Marc is just, well, ugh, I don’t wanna talk about it”
“Thank you, neither do I, I’m still working on breaking all ties with Pam”
“Well I’m glad you’ve finally come to your senses, she’s toxic”
“Anyway, let’s go for some gelato, and we’ll head over to Holts and do some real damage”
“Now you’re talking!”
We got our gelato and sat by the water fountain talking for a while. We were discussing the expectations for his n
ew job when a little blond girl approached me and I recognized her right away.
“Hi lex” she said smiling.
“Hi Lucy, how are you sweetheart?” I said giving her a big hug.
“Oh shizzle, speaking of the devil” muttered Victor.
I looked up and sure enough there was Pam with the stroller coming toward me, with her older son Sam and Marc was trailing in behind them looking down with his hands in his pockets.
“Hey Alex” said Pam “Victor” she acknowledged him.
“Hey Pam, doing some Sunday shopping?” I said ignoring the fact that Marc was standing right next to her.
“Yeah back to school shopping, they go back in a month so I figured I’d get started early. I thought you always shopped in Yorkville” she pointed out.
“Not today, we’re heading over to Holts, going to Cairo in a week, need some skimpy bikinis, and beach wear” I said looking at her then at Marc, he glanced at me for a second and then looked away.
“Wow Cairo, sounds expensive” she said. I stood up to be at eye level with her and just a foot away from Marc, I held my hand out for Victor, he grabbed it and stood up as well.
I smiled “Well, yeah it is, we have a private cabana, and our own private beach area, he went all out for me” I said sounding as cocky as I could without breaking a sweat.
“Sounds amazing” she said after a long silence.
“So things are ok between the two of you then I guess” she said.
“Yeah, things are great” I said and looked over at Marc “What’s the matter, don’t you say hi anymore?” he looked at me and gestured a hello then looked away.
“Oh don’t mind him, he hates shopping” said Pam rolling her eyes.
“Well Pam, it was great seeing you but Holts awaits and we have some damage to do” “Marc” I said acknowledging him. “Bye baby girl, have fun shopping” I said giving Lucy a hug.
As we walked away, I didn’t realize but I was still holding Victor’s hand.
“Baby girl, I don’t mind holding your hand but I’m in a lot of pain right now, you’re digging your nails into me” said Victor.
I let it go immediately “I’m sorry Vic, I thought I was going to faint”