aut clude et positos tinea pertunde libellos.
frange miser calamum uigilataque proelia dele,
qui facis in parua sublimia carmina cella,
ut dignus uenias hederis et imagine macra.
spes nulla ulterior; didicit iam diues auarus 30
tantum admirari, tantum laudare disertos,
ut pueri Iunonis auem. sed defluit aetas
et pelagi patiens et cassidis atque ligonis.
taedia tunc subeunt animos, tunc seque suamque
Terpsichoren odit facunda et nuda senectus. 35
[17] But from this day forth no man who weaves the tuneful web of song and has bitten Apollo’s laurel will be compelled to endure toil unworthy of his craft. To your task, young men! Your Prince is looking around and goading you on, seeking objects for his favour. If you expect patronage from any other quarter, and in that hope are filling up the parchment of your saffron tablet, you had better order faggots at once, Telesinus, and present your productions to the spouse of Venus; or else put away your tomes, and let bookworms bore holes in them where they lie. Break your pen, poor wretch; destroy the battles that have robbed you of your sleep — you that are inditing lofty strains in a tiny garret, that you may come forth worthy of a scraggy bust wreathed with ivy! No hope have you beyond that; your rich miser has now learnt only to admire, only to commend the eloquent, just as boys admire the bird of Juno. Meantime the years flow by that could have endured the sea, the helmet, or the spade; the soul becomes wearied, and an eloquent but penniless old age curses itself and its own Terpsichore!
accipe nunc artes. ne quid tibi conferat iste,
quem colis et Musarum et Apollinis aede relicta,
ipse facit uersus atque uni cedit Homero
propter mille annos, et si dulcedine famae
succensus recites, maculosas commodat aedes. 40
haec longe ferrata domus seruire iubetur
in qua sollicitas imitatur ianua portas.
scit dare libertos extrema in parte sedentis
ordinis et magnas comitum disponere uoces;
nemo dabit regum quanti subsellia constant 45
et quae conducto pendent anabathra tigillo
quaeque reportandis posita est orchestra cathedris.
nos tamen hoc agimus tenuique in puluere sulcos
ducimus et litus sterili uersamus aratro.
nam si discedas, laqueo tenet ambitiosi 50
[consuetudo mali, tenet insanabile multos]
scribendi cacoethes et aegro in corde senescit.
[36] And now learn the devices by which the patron for whose favour you desert the temples of the Muses and Apollo seeks to avoid spending anything on you. He writes verses of his own; yielding the palm to none but Homer — and that only because of his thousand years. If the sweets of fame fire you to give a recitation, he puts at your disposal a tumbledown house in some distant quarter, the door of which is closely barred like the gate of a beleaguered city. He knows how to supply you Avith freedmen to sit at the end of the rows, and how to distribute about the room the stalwart voices of his retainers: but none of your great men will give you as much as will pay for the benches, or for the tiers of seats resting on hired beams, or for the chairs in the front rows which will have to be returned when done with. Yet for all that, we poets stick to our task; we go on drawing furrows in the thin soil, and turning up the shore with unprofitable plough. For if you would give it up, the itch for writing and making a name holds you fast as with a noose, and becomes inveterate in your distempered brain.
sed uatem egregium, cui non sit publica uena,
qui nihil eitum soleat deducere, nec qui
communi feriat carmen triuiale moneta, 55
hunc, qualem nequeo monstrare et sentio tantum,
anxietate carens animus facit, omnis acerbi
inpatiens, cupidus siluarum aptusque bibendis
fontibus Aonidum. neque enim cantare sub antro
Pierio thyrsumque potest contingere maesta 60
paupertas atque aeris inops, quo nocte dieque
corpus eget: satur est cum dicit Horatius ‘euhoe.’
quis locus ingenio, nisi cum se carmine solo
uexant et dominis Cirrhae Nysaeque feruntur
pectora uestra duas non admittentia curas? 65
magnae mentis opus nec de lodice paranda
attonitae currus et equos faciesque deorum
aspicere et qualis Rutulum confundat Erinys.
nam si Vergilio puer et tolerabile desset
hospitium, caderent omnes a crinibus hydri, 70
surda nihil gemeret graue bucina. poscimus ut sit
non minor antiquo Rubrenus Lappa coturno,
cuius et alueolos et laenam pignerat Atreus?
non habet infelix Numitor quod mittat amico,
Quintillae quod donet habet, nec defuit illi 75
unde emeret multa pascendum carne leonem
iam domitum; constat leuiori belua sumptu
nimirum et capiunt plus intestina poetae.
[53] But your real poet, who has a vein of genius all his own — one who spins no hackneyed lays, and whose pieces are struck from no common mint — such an one as I cannot point to, and only feel — is the product of a soul free from care, that knows no bitterness, that loves the woodlands, and is fitted to drink at the Muses’ spring. For how can unhappy Poverty sing songs in the Pierian cave and grasp the thyrsus when it is short of cash, which the body has need of both by night and day? Horace’s stomach was well filled when he shouted his cry of Evoe! Where can genius find a place except in a heart stirred by song alone, that shuts out every thought but one, and is swept along by the lords of Cirrha and of Nysa! It needs a lofty soul, not one that is dismayed at the cost of a coverlet, to have visions of chariots and horses and Gods’ faces, or to tell with what a mien the Fury confounded the Rutulian : had Virgil possessed no slave, and no decent roof over his head, all the snakes would have fallen from the Fury’s hair; no dread note would have boomed from her voiceless trumpet. Do we expect Rubrenus Lappa to be as great in the buskin as the ancients, when his Atreus has to be pawned for his cloak and crockery? Numitor, poor man, has nothing to give to a needy friend, though he is rich enough to send presents to his mistress, and he had enough, too, to buy a tamed lion that needed masses of meat for his keep. It costs less, no doubt, to keep a lion than a poet; the poet’s belly is more capacious!
contentus fama iaceat Lucanus in hortis
marmoreis, at Serrano tenuique Saleiio 80
gloria quantalibet quid erit, si gloria tantum est?
curritur ad uocem iucundam et carmen amicae
Thebaidos, laetam cum fecit Statius urbem
promisitque diem: tanta dulcedine captos
adficit ille animos tantaque libidine uolgi 85
auditur. sed cum fregit subsellia uersu
esurit, intactam Paridi nisi uendit Agauen.
ille et militiae multis largitus honorem
semenstri uatum digitos circumligat auro.
quod non dant proceres, dabit histrio. tu Camerinos 90
et Baream, tu nobilium magna atria curas?
praefectos Pelopea facit, Philomela tribunos.
haut tamen inuideas uati quem pulpita pascunt.
quis tibi Maecenas, quis nunc erit aut Proculeius
aut Fabius, quis Cotta iterum, quis Lentulus alter? 95
tum par ingenio pretium, tunc utile multis
pallere et uinum toto nescire Decembri.
[79] Lucan, indeed, reclining amid the statues of his gardens, may be content with fame; but what will ever so much glory bring in to Serranus, or to the starving Saleius, if it be glory only? When Statius has gladdened the city by promising a day, people flock to hear his pleasing voice and his loved Thebais; so charmed are their souls by his sweetness, with such rapture does the multitude listen to him. But when his verses have brought down the house, poor Statius will starve if he does not sell his virgin Agave to Paris : for it is Paris who appo
ints men to military commands; it is Paris who puts the golden ring round the poet’s finger after six months of service. You can get from a stage-player what no great man will give you: why frequent the spacious antechambers of the Bareae or the Camerini? It is Pelopea 4 that appoints our Prefects, and Philomela our Tribunes! Yet you need not begrudge the bard who gains his living from the play-house: who nowadays will be a Maecenas to you, a Proculeius, or a Fabius? who another Cotta, or a second Lentulus? Genius in those days met with its due reward; many then found their profit in pale cheeks and in abjuring potations all through December.
uester porro labor fecundior, historiarum
scriptores? perit hic plus temporis atque olei plus.
nullo quippe modo millensima pagina surgit 100
omnibus et crescit multa damnosa papyro;
sic ingens rerum numerus iubet atque operum lex.
quae tamen inde seges? terrae quis fructus apertae?
quis dabit historico quantum daret acta legenti?
[98] And is your labour more remunerative, ye writers of history? More time, more oil, is wasted here; regardless of all limit, the pages run up to thousands; the pile of paper is ever mounting to your ruin. So ordains the vast array of facts, and the rules of the craft. But what harvest will you gather, what fruit, from the tilling of your land? Who will give to an historian as much as he gives to the man who reads out the news?
‘sed genus ignauum, quod lecto gaudet et umbra.’ 105
dic igitur quid causidicis ciuilia praestent
officia et magno comites in fasce libelli.
ipsi magna sonant, sed tum cum creditor audit
praecipue, uel si tetigit latus acrior illo
qui uenit ad dubium grandi cum codice nomen. 110
tunc inmensa caui spirant mendacia folles
conspuiturque sinus; ueram deprendere messem
si libet, hinc centum patrimonia causidicorum,
parte alia solum russati pone Lacertae.
consedere duces, surgis tu pallidus Aiax 115
dicturus dubia pro libertate bubulco
iudice. rumpe miser tensum iecur, ut tibi lasso
figantur uirides, scalarum gloria, palmae.
quod uocis pretium? siccus petasunculus et uas
pelamydum aut ueteres, Maurorum epimenia, bulbi 120
aut uinum Tiberi deuectum, quinque lagonae.
si quater egisti, si contigit aureus unus,
inde cadunt partes ex foedere pragmaticorum.
‘Aemilio dabitur quantum licet, et melius nos
egimus.’ huius enim stat currus aeneus, alti 125
quadriiuges in uestibulis, atque ipse feroci
bellatore sedens curuatum hastile minatur
eminus et statua meditatur proelia lusca.
sic Pedo conturbat, Matho deficit, exitus hic est
Tongilii, magno cum rhinocerote lauari 130
qui solet et uexat lutulenta balnea turba
perque forum iuuenes longo premit assere Maedos
empturus pueros, argentum, murrina, uillas;
spondet enim Tyrio stlattaria purpura filo.
[et tamen est illis hoc utile. purpura uendit] 135
causidicum uendunt amethystina; conuenit illi
et strepitu et facie maioris uiuere census,
sed finem inpensae non seruat prodiga Roma.
[105] “O but historians are a lazy crew, that delight in lounging and the shade.” Tell me then what do pleaders get for their services in the courts, and for those huge bundles of papers which they bring with them? They talk big enough, especially if a creditor of their own happens to be listening: or if, more urgent still, they get poked in the ribs by one who has brought a huge ledger to claim a doubtful debt. Then indeed do their capacious bellows pant forth prodigious lies! Then are their breasts be-slobbered! and yet, if you want to discover their real gains, you may put on one side the fortunes of a hundred lawyers, on the other that of a single jockey of the Red! The great men are seated; you rise, a pale-faced Ajax, to declaim before a bumpkin judge in a case of contested liberty. Strain your lungs, poor fool, until they burst, that when exhausted by your labours some green palm-branches may be put up to adorn your garret. What fee will your voice bring in? A dried-up ham; a jar of sprats; some veteran onions which would serve as rations for a Moor, or five flagons of wine that has sailed down the Tiber. If you have pled on four occasions, and been lucky enough to get a gold piece, a bit of it, as part of the compact, will go to the attorney. Aemilius will get the maximum legal fee, though he did not plead so well as we did; but then he has a bronze chariot in his forecourt, with four stately steeds, and an effigy of himself, seated on a gallant charger, brandishing from afar a bending spear, and practising for battle with one eye closed. That is how Pedo becomes bankrupt, and how Matho fails; and such will be the end of Tongilius, who frequents the baths with a huge oil-flask of rhinoceros horn, and disturbs the bathers with a mob of dirty retainers. His Maedian bearers are weighed down by the long poles of his litter as he passes through the Forum on his way to buy slaves or plate, agate vases or country houses; for that foreign robe of his, with its Tyrian purple, gains him credit. These gentlemen get profit out of this display; the purple or the violet robe brings practice to a lawyer; it pays him to live with a racket and an appearance beyond his means, and wasteful Rome sets no limits to extravagance.
fidimus eloquio? Ciceroni nemo ducentos
nunc dederit nummos, nisi fulserit anulus ingens. 140
respicit haec primum qui litigat, an tibi serui
octo, decem comites, an post te sella, togati
ante pedes. ideo conducta Paulus agebat
sardonyche, atque ideo pluris quam Gallus agebat,
quam Basilus. rara in tenui facundia panno. 145
quando licet Basilo flentem producere matrem?
quis bene dicentem Basilum ferat? accipiat te
Gallia uel potius nutricula causidicorum
Africa, si placuit mercedem ponere linguae.
[139] Trust in eloquence, indeed? Why, no one would give Cicero himself two hundred pence nowadays unless a huge ring were blazing on his finger. The first thing that a litigant looks to is, Have you eight slaves and a dozen retainers? Have you a litter to wait on you, and gowned citizens to walk before you? That is why Paulus used to hire a sardonyx ring; that is why he earned a higher fee than Gallus or Basilus. When is eloquence ever found beneath a shabby coat? When does Basilus get the chance of producing in court a weeping mother? Who would listen to him, however well he spoke? Better go to Gaul or to Africa, that nursing mother of lawyers, if you would make a living by your tongue!
declamare doces? o ferrea pectora Vetti, 150
cum perimit saeuos classis numerosa tyrannos.
nam quaecumque sedens modo legerat, haec eadem stans
perferet atque eadem cantabit uersibus isdem.
occidit miseros crambe repetita magistros.
quis color et quod sit causae genus atque ubi summa 155
quaestio, quae ueniant diuersa parte sagittae,
nosse uolunt omnes, mercedem soluere nemo.
‘mercedem appellas? quid enim scio?’ ‘culpa docentis
scilicet arguitur, quod laeuae parte mamillae
nil salit Arcadico iuueni, cuius mihi sexta 160
quaque die miserum dirus caput Hannibal inplet,
quidquid id est de quo deliberat, an petat urbem
a Cannis, an post nimbos et fulmina cautus
circumagat madidas a tempestate cohortes.
quantum uis stipulare et protinus accipe: quid do 165
ut totiens illum pater audiat?’ haec alii sex
uel plures uno conclamant ore sophistae
et ueras agitant lites raptore relicto;
fusa uenena silent, malus ingratusque maritus
et quae iam ueteres sanant mortaria caecos. 170
[150] Or do you teach rhetoric? O Vettius! what iron bowels must you have when your troop of scholars slays the cruel tyr
ant: when each in turn stands up, and repeats what he has just been conning in his seat, reciting the self-same things in the self-same verses! Served up again and again, the cabbage is the death of the unhappy master! What complexion should be put on the case; within what category it falls; what is the crucial point; what hits will be made on the other side — these are things which everyone wants to know, but for which no one is willing to pay. “Pay indeed? Why, what have I learnt?” asks the scholar. It is the teacher’s fault, of course, that the Arcadian youth feels no flutter in his left breast when he dins his “dire Hannibal” into my unfortunate head on every sixth day of the week, whatever be the question which he is pondering: whether he should make straight for the city from the field of Cannae, or whether, after the rain and thunder, he should lead around his cohorts, all dripping after the storm. Name any sum you please and you shall have it: what would I give that the lad’s father might listen to him as often as I do! So cry half-a-dozen or more of our sophists in one breath, entering upon real lawsuits of their own, abandoning “The Ravisher” and forgetting all about “The Poisoner” or “The wicked and thankless Husband,” or the drugs that restore sight to the chronic blind.
ergo sibi dabit ipse rudem, si nostra mouebunt
consilia, et uitae diuersum iter ingredietur
ad pugnam qui rhetorica descendit ab umbra,
summula ne pereat qua uilis tessera uenit
frumenti; quippe haec merces lautissima. tempta 175
Chrysogonus quanti doceat uel Pollio quanti
lautorum pueros, artem scindes Theodori.
[171] And so, if my counsel goes for anything, I would advise the man who comes down from his rhetorical shade to fight for a sum that would buy a trumpery corn-ticket — for that’s the most handsome fee he will ever get — to present himself with a discharge, and enter upon some other walk of life. If you ask what fees Chrysogonus and Pollio get for teaching music to the sons of our great men, you will tear up the Rhetoric of Theodorus.
balnea sescentis et pluris porticus in qua
gestetur dominus quotiens pluit. anne serenum
Delphi Complete Works of Juvena Page 36