by Katie Roman
Aleka swung toward the carriage house, searching in the dark for the speaker. She feared she would see a glint of steel in the moonlight and would soon join her mother in the ground. Instead, the Admiral emerged from the shadows, swerving slightly as he approached. She shrank back against the house’s wall when she smelled the whiskey on him. Her mind recalled the smell of blood that mixed with it the last time she encountered him after he’d been drinking.
“Afraid?” His voice mocked her.
She straightened, willing herself not to be afraid, though every instinct told her to run far and hide. “I’m not afraid of you,” she said confidently. Her voice cracked, diminishing the bravado of her words.
He let out a mirthless chuckle. He was closer now. As her eyes adjusted to the dark, she could see the glassy look in his eyes. “You don’t belong here,” he said thickly.
The fumes from his breath made Aleka’s eyes water. “Then say my debt is paid and release me,” she managed, swallowing a lump in her throat. “You don’t need me here.”
“What will my mother say when she finds out? She wants to keep a close watch on you, Aleka.”
Aleka looked desperately toward the kitchen door. She wished she had never come outside. “I could come to visit when I’m a renowned traveling musician. I’ll not forget her kindness.”
He laughed, and in dim light, Aleka saw his eyes lock onto her. “Renowned musician, indeed. No, Miss Akoni,” he said, moving his hand toward her face. Aleka flinched, bracing herself for a strike, but none came. Instead his cold fingers stroked her face, lifting her chin so she looked at him. “You and I are stuck together.” His hand dropped from her face, grabbing her wrist tightly. “Don’t disappoint or shame me.” He squeezed once for good measure and then stumbled back into the house.
Aleka let out a ragged breath, shaking as much from the chill in the air as from fear. She rubbed her face where his hand had touched her, still able to feel the cool fingers running along her cheek, like the touch was frozen into her flesh. She hurried inside to wash her face.
~*~*~
The Admiral stayed in bed most of the rest of the day, and Aleka tried to go about her normal duties as though nothing had happened. Though she was expecting it, no orders were issued for her to change her routine. That night, she was especially glad to see Deana. They hadn’t had a chance to speak since the Admiral took her violin away.
At first, they didn’t speak. Deana just listened to Aleka play. She didn’t seem to have any interest in playing or singing herself. After two songs, Aleka lowered her violin and regarded Deana carefully.
“Why did you lie about my papers?” she asked plainly.
Deana stared up at Aleka from her bench with wide eyes before offering a half smile and looking away. “It was wrong what happened that day in court.” Aleka remembered Deana sitting there, looking tired as the magistrate ruined her life. “To be allowed so little time to mourn your mother, and then to be expected to serve her indentureship. I knew Lady Ghilian didn’t have a use for you, but she couldn’t sell your papers to just anyone. I thought you would be suited here.”
“But why, my lady? As everyone is quick to point out, I have no skills.”
Deana looked at the violin in her hands. “You have skills, just not the ones they all expect you to have. I felt bad, Aleka.”
Aleka looked away, closing her eyes. “So it’s pity, then?”
“In some part, yes, but there’s more to it. I hate to see talent wasted. You’re no chambermaid, and if I can influence Admiral Ghilian, you could be so much more. Aleka, I want us to be a family here.”
Aleka’s breath caught. She opened her mouth to speak, but there was a sudden presence behind her.
“This is highly inappropriate talk between a lady of the house and her servant,” the Admiral said. “Your violin, Aleka. Then go to bed.”
Aleka surrendered the violin without another word. As she left, she heard the beginnings of an argument between the Admiral and Deana.
Family, she thought. What does she know of my family? The thought filled her with indignant anger.
~*~*~
Life continued as it had, though now Aleka was kept under stricter watch. She was not allowed to leave the grounds, even with a chaperone. Her every movement was accounted for by the Admiral himself or his valet. He might have been more lenient if Deana hadn’t uttered the word ‘family’ to Aleka. It enraged the Admiral so much that each time they met, he coldly reminded her that no servant would ever be a part of his family. However, try as he might, Deana continued to act as a sister to Aleka.
The Admiral delegated her tasks each morning. Often, they were the same ones she had been doing before he returned home. Sometimes though, he had her scrubbing the chamber pots or mucking out the carriage house, anything that might remind her exactly where she stood. As though she didn’t have enough reminders already. He could only find so much work to punish her with, and most days he contented himself with cruel remarks about her work ethic or musical abilities.
His one small mercy toward her was that her nightly practice with Deana continued. Each time he handed over her violin, Aleka felt a piece of herself wither. He controlled every facet of her life, even the one thing she should have been able to keep for herself. If he wanted, she knew he could snuff out her life as easily as he had done with her mother. Each time Aleka looked him in the eyes she saw no guilt, no remorse for what he’d done. And yet, eventually Aleka felt her anger drain away, replaced with a weary, crushing sadness.
Sometimes at night, if she wasn’t immediately drawn into sleep, she would lie awake dreaming up fantastic ways to escape the Admiral. She imagined running away to join the Thieves’ Guild, convincing the King of Thieves to rob the Admiral blind. Or she dreamt of taking to the seas, signing on with the crafty Captain Blackstone of the Fearless Dawn. That would truly drive the Admiral mad. But mostly Aleka just envisioned walking out the door a free woman, to make her own way in Glenbard; holding her head high as though she was Kunegunda herself reborn. No chains had been able to hold the Nareroc Queen, and no chains could hold Aleka. They were pleasant thoughts to fall asleep to, but in the mornings her thoughts turned gray again, her prospects bleak as she trudged through another day.
“You look unwell, Aleka,” Deana said, three weeks into the new arrangement. She had decided to stop playing the virginal until after she gave birth. She joked that she was too big to sit at the keys now, but Aleka wondered if maybe the lady finally realized how terrible she was.
Aleka idly plucked at her strings, not making a coherent tune. “I am tired.”
“Perhaps I should talk to my husband about your workload.”
From the hall Aleka saw Amelia move by, bearing a tray for the Admiral’s office. The maid sneered ever so slightly before moving past the door.
“No,” Aleka said quickly. She didn’t want to listen to Amelia tell her how worthless and spoiled she was later. “I haven’t been sleeping well.” Aleka failed to mention that her lack of sleep was mostly due to the Admiral making sure she was awake before everyone else to get a jump on the day.
“Perhaps you’re getting sick. I will send for a healer tomorrow.”
“My lady, that really isn’t necessary.”
“But you are my friend, and I don’t like to see my friends ill.”
Aleka stopped plucking at her violin. An ember, one Aleka thought had long been extinguished, sparked deep within her. “Friend? We aren’t friends, my lady.” Her words came out softly, but were fueled by resentment. She’d never had a cross word for Deana, but it was Deana’s fault Aleka had to serve this house in the first place.
Deana blinked back her shock. “Aleka, I thought we were getting closer. I told you, I wanted us to be like family.”
Aleka held out her wrist for Deana, making her look at the leather bracelet. “You bought my labor, my lady. You paid for me to be your friend. I am merely a wind-up toy for you, an amusement, not family.” Aleka knew she sh
ould stop speaking, but Deana’s comment brought her back to life. “Your husband murdered my mother, and yet you speak of friendship.”
Weeks had passed since there’d been mention of Halia. It had been even longer since Aleka brought up how the Admiral was responsible. Aleka tried to bury it deep down, but apparently she hadn’t pushed it down far enough.
“I thought you were happy to play with me,” Deana said sadly.
To her credit, Deana never denied the Admiral’s role in Halia’s death. She didn’t deny it, but she didn’t truly acknowledge it, either. Aleka wasn’t sure if she was grateful or annoyed.
Aleka lifted her violin, tucking it gently under her chin. She played a fast piece, letting the quick, cheery notes chase away the words she had spoken. Just like that, the spark within flickered and died again.
“Aleka?” Deana said before she could start a new tune. “Are you alright?”
Aleka sagged, dropping her shoulders and letting her instrument hang limply in her hands. “I apologize, my lady. I am overtired and…and…” And what? When her buried anger resurfaced, she selfishly directed it at the only person who tried to understand her plight. “It hasn’t been easy since my mother’s death. I’m sorry to have taken it out on you.”
“I understand.” Deana patted the spot next to her on her bench and Aleka sat beside her, breathing in the scent of lilacs that clung to Deana. “I would like to help you with all this.”
“Do you truly mean that?”
“Yes. Of course.”
“Then convince the Admiral to let me go to my mother’s grave again, even if it is only once. I will do any task asked of me. I will lose as much sleep as I must if he will just allow me to see her.”
Deana took her hands. “I make no promises to his decision, but I will ask. I’ll do this, but please remember it was I who helped you next time you lose your temper.” There wasn’t even a hint of anger in Deana’s voice. She sounded more sad than anything.
“I’m sorry, my lady. I don’t feel like myself lately, but I will do a better job of keeping myself in check. Thank you for everything you’ve done for me.”
The smile Deana provided lit up the room. “We are friends and family, Aleka. No matter your mood. Come, tell me something of your mother. Some happy tale.”
~*~*~
The next afternoon as Aleka was elbow deep in the monthly laundry, a shadow hovered over her. She looked up to see the Admiral. He reached down and grabbed her roughly by the elbow, pulling her to her feet.
“What have you been doing with my wife?” he bellowed, shaking her. “You overstep your bounds here,” he hissed.
Water dripped down her arms and up her sleeves. She tried to break free, but he only held her tighter. “I haven’t done anything!” she pleaded. In the doorway of the kitchen, she saw Amelia appear briefly, then disappear back into the house.
“Whatever hold you have over my wife is to end now! Do you understand me?” He screamed near her ear, spittle hitting her ear and cheek. “Or else I will crush you!”
Aleka pulled as hard as she could, nearly ripping her sleeve, but the Admiral clung to her arm as she tried to jerk to the side. He lunged at her before she could get away, wrapping his arms around her and pinning her arms to her sides, trying to crush the air from her lungs as she struggled. Knowing she could never hope to overpower him, she went limp instead, forcing the Admiral to hold her up completely.
“Stop that!” he growled into her ear, the breeze from his breath causing her to shiver. Still, she continued to act as though she had no bones, forcing him closer to the ground. “I will end you, Aleka. You came into this house and ruined everything! You forget where you come from, you dirty island urchin!”
“You forget where I come from,” she hissed. He only squeezed tighter, making her gasp painfully for air.
“Edward!” Deana’s voice jumped higher than Aleka thought possible.
The Admiral, clearly startled by his wife, released Aleka immediately and she hit the dirt. She crawled away, putting her wash tub between them, panting. Deana stood in the kitchen doorway with Amelia hovering behind her.
“We do not treat our servants like this!”
The Admiral pivoted toward Deana, stalking across the courtyard until he stood before her. Aleka’s heart jumped to her throat. She couldn’t allow him to hurt Deana too, but she was rooted to the ground in terror.
“We don’t coddle them, either!” His voice carried, causing Aleka to shrink back further. “You are as bad as Mother! Treating them like ‘family’ instead of the hired help!”
Behind the lady of the house, Amelia ducked out of view, but to her credit, Deana didn’t flinch in the face of his blinding anger. “I treat our servants like people. You would do well to remember that is what they are. And when they make a reasonable request, you shouldn’t go into a rage!” Deana stepped outside, coming toe to toe with the Admiral, her small stature eclipsed by him. “If I catch you hurting anyone in this household again, I will leave with our child.”
Her threat had all the weight of a blacksmith’s anvil. The Admiral looked over his shoulder at Aleka, his eyes narrowed in hate. He pushed past Deana, leveling a glare at Amelia on his way past, who was still hidden from Aleka’s view.
When he was gone, Amelia hurried to Deana’s side as Deana came to help Aleka up. She hauled Aleka to her feet with a strength she did not expect from a well-bred, pregnant noblewoman. “Aleka, Amelia, if you witness or are subject to violence from anyone in this house, come to me immediately! I will not allow such behavior. I don’t care if Admiral Ghilian is the source. Aleka, are you alright?”
“Yes, my lady. Merely shaken.” She rubbed her arms, feeling the weight of the Admiral still on them. “Thank you for helping me.”
“Amelia, please help Aleka finish the laundry. I am going to speak with the Admiral privately.” She offered Aleka a tight smile and a pat on the back before returning to the house.
“Thank you, Amelia, for getting help,” Aleka said quietly as she knelt back by her tub, plunging her hands into the lye water.
“I don’t know what you did to make him hate you, duchess, but you’d do well not to ask any more favors of Lady Ghilian. Just play your silly violin, keep your head down, and steer clear.”
“Amelia, I’m not trying –”
“I don’t care what you did or didn’t do,” Amelia interrupted brusquely. “All I know is the Admiral has a temper and it’s made worse by drink, but if you stay away from him, he limits his interaction to mean comments. I’d much rather return to the days of hearing snide remarks about my dusting, than having to fetch Lady Ghilian because he’s going to kill you same as he did your mother. For the love of the gods, girl, just stay out of his way!”
Amelia bent over her work without another word. Aleka continued to wash the laundry, struggling to see through her tears.
~*~*~
That night, Aleka found the Admiral sitting in with Deana. She halted at the doorway, wondering if she should just go back to her rooms.
“Come in, Aleka,” Deana said in her usual cheery voice. “Admiral Ghilian is going to join us from now on.” Though her tone never faltered, she offered Aleka a sad smile. “He needs to see your worth for himself.” At this, she turned to the Admiral, the remnants of a smile completely gone.
He curled his lip and crossed his arms over his chest. “By all means, show me that my family’s money has not been wasted on you.” She remembered it wasn’t so long ago that he had begrudgingly complimented her playing. Apparently, his memory for compliments was short. “I-,” he started, and then sighed and looked at Deana, who nodded. “I look forward to our evenings together.” Aleka imagined the words, said for Deana’s sake, hurt him as though he was having teeth pulled from his head.
Aleka’s grip tightened around her violin. If this was the Battered Traveler, at least five regulars would have jumped to her defense. She could have stood over the Admiral with support behind her, proof she was be
tter than him; but here, she was at his mercy. There was no use fighting it. For all her daydreams of better places, there was a piece of leather around her wrist that stated she was nothing more than mere property.
After a moment, she placed her violin under her chin and set bow to strings. If playing was her only escape, then she would play. She would play and play until she could rain down a squall of vengeance on him, the likes of which he had never seen.
Chapter Nine
Aleka woke to a great commotion. Amelia came into the room with a lantern, scrambling about for clothes other than her night dress.
“Is the house on fire?” Aleka asked, rubbing her eyes and sitting up.
“May as well be. Lady Ghilian has gone into labor. Best get up before someone drags you out of bed. You and I are to take turns helping the midwife and healer. Get up, duchess, there’s work to do.”
Aleka and Amelia dressed quickly. Amelia hurried out of the room when she was dressed, but Aleka lingered. She rummaged through her bag until she felt her god idols. Aleka held each idol up to the candlelight until she found the worn one of Huiki, and then slipped it into her apron pocket and hurried after Amelia.
Amelia and Aleka were set up in shifts to aid the healer and keep Deana company. They were told that since it was her first child, the labor may take some time. By midafternoon, Aleka was left alone with Deana when Amelia went to fetch water and the healer was eating a quiet lunch in the kitchen. The Admiral paced a hole in the garden as he waited for news. Aleka could see him out the window walking back and forth with his head down, hands clasped behind his back.
They hadn’t had a moment alone since Deana and the Admiral’s fight in the yard, and Aleka planned to speak to her about all the trouble she seemed to cause through her mere existence. She had a speech worked out, but now that they were alone, the words fled her.
Deana smiled from her bed. Her forehead was covered in a sheen of sweat and she looked exhausted. Before going to lunch, the healer had made Deana walk around the room, trying to break her water. Once the healer returned, Deana would have to do it again. Now was not the time to speak about Aleka’s position in this world.