“No, that’s a Hoibook alert.” Robbie glanced down. “Ellen changed her profile pic.” He showed Joe the phone.”
Joe grumbled again. “Anyhow … Jason seems to think …”
Bling.
“Jesus Christ.”
“Weird.
“What?”
“Jason’s status. It says, He who is from the future is actually from the past, but has always been the present. Who is he?”
Joe blinked slowly several times. “Is that a riddle?”
“I don’t …”
Bling.
Robbie laughed. “Frank answered it.”
“What did he say?’
“Jesus.” Bling. “Jason said wrong.” Bling. “Now Frank said Napoleon. Spelled wrong.” Bling. “Jason said ...”
“Enough. Is that damn thing gonna go off every time everyone posts?”
“That would be insane, considering …” Robbie looked down to the phone. “There are currently three hundred and two … no wait, four hundred and … wait, the number is going up, six hundred registered …”
“What the hell are people doing? They’re supposed to be working. And turn that off if everyone is going to be posting.”
“Just alerts on people I want to follow.”
“Why are you following Jason?” Joe asked.
“Because of the posts like the one he did. You know he’s going to be cryptic.”
“That’s for sure.” Joe reached for Frank’s office door. “Do you have a key?”
“He doesn’t lock his office.”
“Well, that explains how someone got in here and rigged it.”
“Person or persons,” Robbie said. “Let me check it out, first, I’ll survive before you. You’re old.”
“Swell. Go on.”
Carefully, Robbie inched open the door, waited, then blasted it open and ducked.
Nothing.
He did a quick visual check of the small office, then waved in Joe. “It’s safe. Just watch out for the bear trap.”
“Another one?”
“No.” Robbie crouched down to the trap; it appeared as if Frank flung it. “Oh my God, it has flesh in it.”
“What about the chair?”
“How the hell did Frank miss the car battery?” Robbie carefully disconnected it. “Everything here was raw. It could be to throw us off. Nothing, even that arrow rig…” He pointed. “Is sophisticated. For example. If Danny Hoi wanted to electrocute Frank, he certainly wouldn’t use something like a battery.”
“Yeah, but anyone that knows Frank, knows he’d not think twice about it. He’d see the battery and say, ‘Oh what’s that doing here, fucking Dan.’”
Robbie laughed. “Yeah, like he didn’t know who left the bear trap.”
“Problem is, shot, electrocuted, bear trap, and arrow, without a doubt someone wants your brother dead and they’re making it obvious...”
“Yeah,” Robbie replied with a grin.
“What the hell is that about?”
“Just, you know, been a while since we had a mystery.”
“My death was a mystery.”
Robbie shrugged. “True. But you believed someone wanted you dead. Frank is not going to believe it.”
“So he’s not going to be careful.” Joe rubbed his brow. “We need someone on him. Frank can take care of himself, but the goddamn moron thinks he has nine lives, so he’s not caring.”
“He’s not going to go for a body guard. And unfortunately, the only way Frank let’s someone hang out with him twenty-four seven is if he thinks they need him. Like Dean being blind, me and my arm …”
“That’s it.” Joe snapped. “We get someone to fake a disability and pretend to depend on Frank.”
“It would have to be someone with mad skills. Someone that’s almost as good as Frank, that could protect him.” Robbie smiled. “I got it.”
“Are you thinking who I’m thinking?”
“Well, since I don’t have Frank’s mind reading skills. I don’t know what you’re thinking, but I think we’re thinking the same person. And I just confused myself.”
“We have to get him to agree.”
“It’s gonna be so much fun, because it will irritate his ass.” Robbie said.
“But he’ll do it, because Frank’s his brother.”
Both men paused.
“Wait.” Joe said. “We’re talking about Hal, right?’
“Who else?” Robbie asked.
“Um, Jimmy, you ass.”
“I forgot about him. My bad, but … Jimmy, I love him and all, but he isn’t me or Hal with skills. What disability are we gonna get Hal to fake?”
“I’ll work on that. Now we have that meeting in a little bit. We just need to get Hal there without Frank. How he does it, I don’t know, but Frank shows up at every meeting. We need to keep him away for a little bit.”
Bling.
Robbie lifted his phone. “And we have it. Dean. Frank just posted he’s on his way to see Dean. His leg fell off and grew back wrong.”
“Christ. Well, that’s a good reason to keep him there; I’ll call Dean and tell him to stall him. And …” Joe couldn’t finish his sentence, at that moment, Robbie’s phone went insane with blings. “What the hell? How many people are you following?”
“No, it’s all response to Frank’s post.” Robbie laughed hysterically. “Already, over a hundred people like his post.”
“Give me that.” Joe snatched up the phone and read some of the forty instant comments. Comments like, ‘Hurry, Frank, we need you,’ ‘Get well’. ‘Good luck’, ‘Hope Dean can fix it’, and the worst was from Dan in Security, “Damn, now you can only run 53 MPH lol.”
“They are supposed to be working. Remind me to kill Danny Hoi.” Shaking his head, Joe handed back Robbie the phone as it blinged three more times. “Morons.”
<><><><>
Dean had to admit, he acted cool and unaffected when Danny Hoi dropped off the tablet.
“For you, hope you don’t mind it’s a small screen.”
“It’s fine, Danny, I doubt I will use it,” Dean said. ‘I’m good with texting.”
“Ok, just making sure, have more to deliver. But don’t forget, you need to friend request and respond to the request you have.”
Tablet next to him on the counter, Dean stared at his notes and nodded. Until Danny left, then Dean swiped up that tablet, turned it on and immediately it went to Hoibook.
“Ok, this is cool.”
You have one friend request.
Dean clicked on the notification, it was from Frank. He happily accepted, but didn’t have any more. Perhaps people thought he wasn’t going to be using Hoibook.
Under the ‘People you may know’ section,, Dean just started clicking ‘Send friend request’, admittedly, he couldn’t wait until people accepted his friend request or added him because he wanted to see what was going on.
For the moment, only Frank’s posts made it to the news feed.
“How the hell does Frank have over four hundred friends already?” Dean asked out loud, holding his tablet.
“I’m cool like that. If you didn’t sit and talk to yourself and talked to others, you could have friends too.”
Dean smiled before turning around. “You’re here.”
“I am. I would have been faster but the leg is holding me up. Well, it holds me up, but you know.”
Dean held up his hand. “I know.” He lifted his tablet, “Let’s go to examine room one. How the hell do you have so many friends on Hoibook?”
“I’m the popular guy, I can’t keep up. Look.” He held up his phone. “I have fifty-three requests waiting my approval.”
Dean looked down to his tablet. He still didn’t have any. “Ok, Ok, let’s go,” He pointed.
Frank walked out first and Dean noticed he limped. That alone was odd.
“Frank, you’re limping. Does it hurt that bad?”
“No, it’s hard to walk on.”
Teet
ering between walking, following Frank and looking at his tablet, Dean walked into Exam room one, closed the door, set down the tablet and turned to the sink. “If you can remove your boots, and pull up your pant leg, I’ll take a look.”
“Boot. The other one won’t fit.”
Thinking Frank’s leg must be really swollen, Dean washed up.
“It looks kind of funny.”
“Bet it’s not that bad. What happened?”
“I stepped in a bear trap.”
Dean paused, shook the water from his hand and grabbed for a towel. “A bear trap?’
“Yeah someone was hunting and forgot they set it.”
“People can be so irresponsible. Let’s take a look.”
“Looking at it. I don’t think it’s all that bad. What do you think?”
Dean turned around; saw his leg and tossing all medical professionalism aside, Dean … screamed.
“What!” Frank blasted.
“Frank. Your … your …”
“Great?”
“No. Your … your …”
“Fucking phenomenal, what, Dean, what?”
“Your leg.”
“Is it that bad?”
One arm across his waist, Dean ran his hand over his face two or three times. “Um, no. It’s fine. It’s … um, fine.”
Dean looked down at Frank’s leg. A homemade tourniquet was placed the wounds and from mid-shin down, the entire leg was turned nearly backwards, so much so, the calf muscle was almost on the front of the leg.
“Then why did you scream.”
“I thought I saw a bug.”
“Fuck, Dean, it’s a fucking bug. Almost made me have a heart attack.”
“It was a big bug.”
“How big?”
“Frank, that doesn’t matter. It was …”
“Yeah, Dean it does. If we have big giant bugs, we may have issues. How big.”
“Real big. Now back to this leg.” Dean said. “Frank, how exactly did the leg get like this?”
“A bear trap.”
“I know that, but how did it get like …. Like this.” Dean pointed to the near backwards foot.
“Well, when it was bleeding really bad, I put the tourniquet on. It stopped, bled awhile though. Then when I started walking on it, it kept moving. I would have been here faster but my fucking brother wanted to have a meeting.”
“I see, and the healing agent worked before you got here.”
“Yeah. Does it look that bad? I’m not a doctor or anything.”
“No, no, it’s fine.”
“It’s kinda hard to walk on.”
“I bet.”
“Keeps throwing me off balance.” Frank said. “I take a step, hobble. I’ll manage. Dan said I can’t run fast anymore. Can you fix it?”
Dean tilted his head. “Um …”
“Cause I’ll just have to make due if you can’t. Eventually I’ll stop limping. I think.”
Dean bit his lip. “No, Frank, I’ll fix it. Unfortunately, I’m gonna have to do surgery to correct it.”
“That bad?”
After holding up a finger, Dean removed the tourniquet. “Aw, Frank.”
“What?”
“Could you have at least … put things back in before you put on a bandage?” Dean cringed at the pieces of muscle and ligaments all healed that protruded.
“Sorry. I’m not a doctor.”
Dean touched the site. “Does it hurt?”
“A little.”
“We still have time, but have to move fast. I may Frank, have to cut it off and reattach it.”
“How long will I be out of commission, because really, it will only get in the way for a little bit?”
“Frank, it needs done. With your healing ability. A few days. Maybe.”
“You sure it needs surgery?’
At that second there was a knock on the door.
“Dean?” Ellen called out. “I saw on Hoibook that Frank is here. Can I come in?”
Dean looked at Frank. “We’ll get a second opinion.” He aimed his voice at the door. “Yeah, El, come in.”
The door opened and Ellen walked in. “I saw you hurt your ….” Ellen screamed.
Frank turned left to right. “Fucking monster bug again. I’ll get it, El after this.”
Ellen’s mouth dropped open and she looked at Dean. “The healing agent?’
“Yeah. He tied a tourniquet on it badly.”
“I’m not a doctor.” Frank said.
“What are you gonna do?” Ellen asked.
“I was thinking of cutting it off and putting it back on. That’s our only real option, maybe. But whatever we do, we have to do it fast. Like really fast, speed operation and suturing.”
“El, I trust you,” Frank said. “Do you think it needs surgery?”
“Does it hurt?”
“Not much?”
“Can you walk on it?”
“It’s hard but I’ll manage.”
Ellen shrugged. “Then I’d leave it be.”
“El!” Dean yelled.
“Fucking Dean always looking for a reason to cut into me and experiment.”
“Frank, you asshole.” Dean snapped. “Your foot is backwards. You need surgery or … or... you won’t be able to run like the Killer Babies. You’ll be normal.”
“Oh, fuck that. Cut it off and do it again.”
“Good.” Dean tapped Frank’s shoulder. “Let’s go, El. We have to prep.”
“I’ll be there, Frank, no worries. It’ll be fine.” Ellen kissed him on the cheek and walked out.
Before leaving, Dean stopped at the door. “And don’t go anywhere.”
“Yeah, yeah.” After Dean had gone, he pulled out his phone. He figured he’s start accepting some of the ‘now’ one hundred friend requests and make a status update. “Fucking Dean is cutting off my leg. Who wants it as a lucky charm? I am part rabbit.”
Chapter Sixteen
“Dusting now,” Robbie stated, his voice carrying over the speaker phone as Joe did paperwork. Trying to catch up on all that he missed while he was dead.
“You seeing anything?”
“Looks like eight sets of prints on the trap. The arrow, who knows.”
“This is ridiculous. OK, well, can you come in when you finish up. I have Hal coming back for that meeting, and George is due in.”
“Any word on Frank?’
“No. You have the damn social network connection.”
“Keeping my promise, phone is off until this is done.”
“Good boy, see you soon.” Joe lifted the receiver and hung it back up. When he did, his office door opened. First stating, “You didn’t knock.” Joe lifted his head.
“Dad.” Jimmy said in shock.
“Jimmy, hey!” Joe said with a smile. “I heard you flew it. This is a surprise.”
“Dad.” Hand extended Jimmy, with trembling fingers walked to Joe.
“Nice to see you too.” Joe shook his hand.
“Oh my God.”
“Jimmy, what the hell, you look like you seen a ghost.”
“I am. You.”
“What?”
“Dad, last I saw you … you were blown up.”
Joe cringed. “Damn it, I knew I forgot to tell someone.” He stood. “Come here.”
Like a lost child, Jimmy, with dramatics, flung into Joe, grasping his father.
“There. There.” Joe patted his back. “I’m good. I’m fine. Is that what brings you in. To see me?”
“Yes.”
“That’s nice.”
Jimmy mouthed the word, ‘nice’ with question.
“And just in time for all this craziness. Danny Hoi brought back social networking, and all hell is breaking lose.”
“Dad … I don’t care.” Jimmy sat down. “What happened. How is this possible.”
“It’s a long story. It really is. We’ll discuss it. Right now, you’re welcome to stay for the meeting.”
“I’ll do that be
cause I missed you.”
“That’s nice, thank you.”
A single knock came at the door and Hal popped his head in. “Look who I found lurking outside.”
“Please don’t tell me it’s Frank.” Joe said.
Hal stepped in and George followed.
Admittedly, Joe felt a twinge of nervousness. The party the night before was different, but this was the first time he had actually been in a civil meeting with George in quite some time.
“Joe, I was waiting for the reunion to be over. I know Jimmy here was glad to hear about you.”
“George. Have a seat.”
“Well …” Hal exhaled. “If I breathe in deeply enough, I could choke on the tension.”
“What the hell, Hal?” Joe snapped. “Are you trying to be Frank in his absence?”
“Where is he?” George asked.
“Last I heard he was seeing Dean about another intentional injury.”
George looked at Hal and then to Joe. “Someone tried to take him out again?’
“Oh, yeah,” Joe said. “Bear trap, arrow and electrocution.”
Jimmy sprang to his feet. “Someone is trying to kill, Frank?”
Joe held out his hand. “Yes, we’re looking into it and it wasn’t Johnny. In fact, Robbie and I have a plan. We want to have someone watch Frank, like a body guard.”
“I’ll do it.” Jimmy said.
Hal laughed.
“What?” Jimmy quickly turned to Hal.
“You?”
“Yes, me.”
“As wonderful as an offer as that is, and generous, considering you could give up your own life. You are not the brother to protect him.” Hal sat down.
“You arrogant asshole,” Jimmy snapped. “You think our bionic brother is better.”
Hal gasped. “Look at you mocking our disabled sibling. No, Jimmy, I am the one.”
“Dad.” Jimmy complained.
“Jimmy.” Joe held up his hand. “As arrogant as Hal, is, he has a point. You can’t be the one. Not because of any skills. Mainly, the plan won’t work with you.”
“Thank you, father,” Hal said smug.
Joe added. “Because, Jimmy, Frank sees you as too smart.”
Another gasp from Hal. “I beg your pardon.”
“Pipe down. I said Frank sees Jimmy as too smart for my plan to work.”
“What’s the plan?” Hal asked.
“Later, and quit being a ‘Frank’ and interrupting my meeting.”
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