Affaire de Coeur

by Stephanie O’Hanlon

  Armand took hold of Catalina’s hand, kissing it lightly. “This must be your lovely daughter, Catalina.”

  Her father nodded, turning back to Lucien, who was the only person of interest to the Baron. “We believe in strong family values, strong morals, and following our obligations,” the Baron shouted, his rank breath filtering through the entire group.

  Lucien nodded, sipping at his champagne quickly.

  Colette grabbed my hand, smiling to the group. “Will you excuse us?” She turned, pulling me with her to our corner. “Are you quite done?” she asked, completely frustrated.

  “I just wanted to meet her. It is obvious that the Baron wants Lucien for her.”

  “Oh please, Maddy,” she started, grabbing two glasses of champagne—one for herself and one for me, though she knew I wouldn’t drink it. “There is no way on this earth that Lucien is going to fall for that. I mean, look at them!”

  I looked over. Lucien smiled as Armand turned to Rose, holding a different conversation than Lucien and the La Cienega’s.

  “Did you see her hair? No one has worn that style for at least a year.”

  “Colette—” I started.

  “Well, someone should inform her of this season’s fashions. The Dauphine herself would disapprove. Look how unkempt she is!”

  I sighed heavily. “Knowing the styles and seasons is not important. That type of thing does not attract Lucien. Look at me. I am just as unkempt.”

  “You are not!” She turned to me, her mouth agape. “You are dressed in the finest charmeuse and your undergarments are of the finest linen. Even the diamonds around your neck are real. They could probably feed an entire village if we pawned them! You wear what the Madame la Dauphine orders: colors, lace, silks, brocade, whatever she sets you follow. Just as a lady of your station is expected to. If she plans on living in France, she will need to learn this.”

  “Colette,” I said, lowering my voice. “I am not of that station! I am just a poor little merchant’s daughter who is visiting upon her rich friend of that station.”

  Colette raised her chin, looked over her shoulder toward Catalina, and rolled her eyes. “You really think that Spanish pig is any better? I wonder how much of their fortune her family poured into bringing them here. Look at the way they parade her around in front of him!”

  I looked over to see that indeed the La Cienega’s were pointing to their daughter, who smiled and blushed. Lucien nodded lightly as he looked down at the champagne in his hand. He then scanned the room before going back to Catalina’s father.

  I felt my heart drop slightly, looking down to my own glass of champagne.

  “He is yours, Maddy. Not hers! They only want his status, to set up their bloodline in his wealth. Just like Yolande. They sicken me!”

  I looked back over to see Lucien smiling to them, and my eyes filled with tears. I couldn’t help thinking that I had lost him already, that I was not forward enough, that it was just too hard. I shook my head, turning away from her and dropping my glass. I hurried through the people, covering my face as best as I could.

  “Madeleine!” Colette called out behind me.

  I ran out of the ballroom through a little sitting room to an office, which none of the other guests seemed to care for. The room was empty. I stood in the middle of the room with my back to the door, which I had left open. I held my hands over my face as I wept as silently as I possibly could.

  Such a stupid girl! I scolded myself. No one had the right to claim another person as “theirs” unless they were married. Lucien and I were not married. We could not even get past such a frivolous thing as a first kiss or even hold a conversation without me upsetting him somehow.

  “Madeleine?”

  I quickly turned to see Lucien standing in the doorway. His tall, masculine form startled me, and my body shivered as a pulse of fear shocked through me. I rubbed my face as dry as I could before I turned to him, his long legs bringing him over to me in less than two strides as he looked me over.

  “Are you all right? Are you crying? What has upset you?” His dizzying, blue eyes continued to look me over, making my knees weak.

  “I’m…I am fine, really. I just felt ill for a moment. I’m not used to these stays…that is all,” I lied. I had no intention of telling him it was my fear of losing him to another woman that brought me to tears, like a stupid little schoolgirl.

  “Are you sure?” he asked, his hand coming to my shoulder, stroking it softly.

  I nodded, “Yes, thank you for your concern. I am sure you are missed out in the party. I wish not to take you away from it.”

  He walked a little closer to me, nearly closing all the distance between us, and his body almost up against my own. “Who will I be missed by?”

  I looked up at Lucien, my breathing skipping like it always did when I was around him. “Ummm, your grandmother, your friends…Catalina.”

  His brow furrowed, confused. “Catalina? Catalina La Cienega?”

  I lowered my eyes to his broad chest, staring at the large gold and silver feathers embroidered up the trim of his red justaucorps, my words getting stuck in my throat. “I…well, you were quite enamored with her.” My eyes tried to look elsewhere, but they were drawn back to him. I couldn’t help myself.

  He stepped back. The confusion melted away, and a smile pulled down on one corner of his mouth as his eyes sparkled with delight. “You are jealous.”

  My mouth fell open. “I am not!”

  “You are.” He laughed lightly and stepped toward me once again. “You are jealous of Catalina.”

  I shook my head. My mouth tried to form words, any words, though I couldn’t think of anything to say. I already looked like a fool! “Well, she just,” I kept shaking my head, trying to think of something to say, to add to my ramblings, but I turned away from him. The words fell out of my mouth as I looked to my hands. “She fell all over you, thrust in your sight.”

  He walked up behind me, turning me toward him. He was still smiling, that usual smile. The little smirk he so often did. “Yes, I am aware of Catalina and her parents’ motive, as most of the young women whom I am introduced to are guilty of. Usually, I do not have an excuse to avoid them, but tonight, I was quite pleased when I was able to tell them I was pursuing another young lady.”

  I felt my heart drop again, the second—or was it third—time in one night. “Oh,” I said, my eyes falling to the floor away from him. That stupid urge to cry surfaced, though I tried my best to suppress it.

  He lifted my chin, my eyes coming up to his. “Why would you think it was anyone other than you, Madeleine?”

  My heart lurched forward, and a warm shudder flew through me. Me?

  “I thought I was quite forward with my admiration of you, though it is maddening that we keep being interrupted.”

  I swallowed hard, his face close to my own. His eyes pointed down to me, and the side of his index finger still rested against my chin.

  This was the first time while being so close to Lucien that my mind stopped. I was not aware of the door. I was not aware of the room or what was proper to do in the situation. All I could focus on was Lucien’s dizzying eyes. Not even thoughts were possible at that point.

  “I suppose I have not shown my affection to you clearly enough.”

  “Lucien, I—”

  “Madeleine,” he said. His voice was low and deep, making my toes curl.

  “Yes?” I managed, almost painfully.

  “I,” he started, “am going to kiss you.”

  His eyes swept up my face before he slowly leaned into me, our noses touching first as his lips gently and sweetly pressed against mine. From what Colette and Rose had told me of their experiences with kisses, it was always scandalous. It was fiery and passionate, and it was quick to get out of control.

  A kiss from Lucien was far from that.

  It was soft and sweet, and probably the most passionate for that fact. It was as if he wanted to inhale me. He wanted to take his time,
making it last for eternity in the most sinfully delicious way. It was on the brink of torture! It was at that moment I realized I had been a fool for postponing such an event, such an intimate moment with Lucien!

  My heart pounded frantically. My head swam as my eyes closed and bright stars exploded before me. I felt a faint coming on, nearly losing myself completely as his index finger slowly caressed my neck. His palm softly rested on my cheek, pulling me ever so gently into him.

  When he pulled away from me slightly, I stood in a daze. His lips, only his lips, lightly grazing against my own. They barely touched, but touching just enough to make my knees feel weak and buckle beneath me. His nose swept past mine as he exhaled deeply, and a warm wash of shivers flew through me from the tips of my toes all the way to my head. I was quite sure that if my hair were loose around me, it would have shaken from the delicious shiver.

  His amazingly dizzying eyes looked me over, his voice coming out soft and deep. “Now, that wasn’t so bad. Was it?”

  I couldn’t open my eyes. I couldn’t speak. I almost couldn’t breathe. All that escaped me were slight whimpers as I clung onto him.

  “Do you wish me to kiss you, again?”

  I opened my eyes slowly, looking into his. I felt I did not even have the strength to give a slow and silent nod. A sensuous smile pulled at the side of his mouth. It was one I never seen before, but it thrilled me nonetheless. He slowly leaned into me again, and his lips just as sweetly pressed against my own as I grabbed a handful of fabric from his waistcoat tightly, holding myself up.

  My face flushed warmly. The stars once again exploded before me as I whimpered in his arms. When he gently pulled away from me, his lips touched mine lightly, extremely lightly, like a feather being pressed against them.

  He sighed heavily, seemingly in contentment, in relief. As he looked me over desirously, he said, “I have been waiting a very long time to do that. I am quite pleased I got to do it twice.”

  I swallowed hard once again, still holding onto him tightly. I was quite sure that if I were to let go, I would get caught in my swoon and faint. My heart was beating at an uncontrollable rate. My vision blurred as my grip tightened on his shoulders.

  He held me tightly. A little smirk pulled at his lips before he went to lean into me, again. Instead, he stopped and turned to the wide open door.

  Footsteps filled the sitting room outside, and Colette’s voice called out, “Maddy? Maddy?”

  Lucien let me go and pulled his body away from mine as Colette walked over to the doorway, peering inside. “Oh, there you are!”

  I nodded silently as she looked the two of us over, hopeful almost that she had interrupted once again. After all, that would mean Lucien was still “mine”.

  “Are you all right?” she asked, her eyes coming to mine. She looked for some signal that I was not only all right but that Lucien was still in my favor.

  I nodded, stroking at my face to try and calm my blush. “I am fine. I was feeling ill, and Lucien was looking in on me.”

  He nodded and smiled, turning toward Colette but looking back to me. “Mademoiselle knows of my inquiry of your whereabouts, Madeleine. As you rushed out so quickly, I wanted to make sure nothing had upset you. Perhaps you should sit for a moment? A glass of water might be in accordance.”

  As he ushered me over to one of the armchairs in front of the lavish, large desk, Colette nodded and turned to leave the room. “I shall fetch it for you. I’ll be but a moment.”

  Lucien knelt down in front of me, smiling slyly as he looked back to me. “Well, that was a fairly easy task.”

  “What are you implying?” I asked, looking at him seriously.

  He laughed lightly. “Nothing at all, Mademoiselle, but I must be quick with my thought. Meet me back in here when the next dance starts. I have it on good authority that Mademoiselle Colette’s music teacher will detain her for a dance. Until then, we will both be nonchalant about our rendezvous here, until we speak once again. Is that agreeable?”

  I looked into his eyes. The warm blue and chilling green swirled around, almost like marble. My head slowly nodded in agreement as his eyes captivated me. I really didn’t want Colette to know, anyway. I knew the fuss she would make over my first kiss, with Lucien de Laurent of all men, so I was almost too happy to keep my silence. In fact, I was going to propose the same thing.

  As soon as Lucien was to his feet, Colette and Rose came running in with Constanze—and her entourage—in tow. A glass of water was held out carefully for me.

  “Here you are, Maddy.” Colette rushed to my side, handed me the glass, and put her hand on my forehead as I sipped at the water delicately.

  Constanze looked Lucien over before she looked back to me. Her eyes went immediately back to him as she smiled. “Comte, how admirable of you to see to your guest.”

  Lucien smiled uncomfortably and nodded. “Well, as you know, Madame, I only wish my guests to be comfortable and have a good time. Now, excuse me. I believe my other guests are awaiting me.”

  With that, he bowed to us, signaling a curtsey from those who were standing before meeting my eyes and dashing out of the room.

  I took another sip of water before placing it down on the desk and standing up from the armchair.

  “Madeleine! Are you sure—” Rose started.

  “—Yes, really. You shouldn’t stand,” Constanze interrupted, and all the ladies around her nodded in agreement.

  I grasped hold of my bodice, shaking my head. “I am fine. I just had a moment. We should not waste the party fretting about me.”

  Colette was surprised but obliging when Armand approached us and asked her for a dance. She was not impressed with him this evening. Something told me it was because he was there with Rose.

  She was supposed to be our new friend. Apparently, she was an enemy when it came to pursuing Armand; however, I couldn’t forget Colette’s insistence that she did not have any feelings toward Armand but hatred, which I really doubted.

  Colette was easy to entertain. It was Constanze and her little group that kept a good eye on me. Rose drifted off, seeing an Italian gentleman she was interested in or knew in the past. I couldn’t remember which she had said.

  I knew Constanze was suspicious. She wanted Lucien to chase Yolande, not me. I knew I had to find a distraction of some sort. I looked around the room, trying to find someone Constanze knew—which there were many—who would make a good distraction. My eyes hadn’t scanned over more than two people when Yolande and Constanze whispered about something, both of them not giving me a second look before they ran off across the room.

  I sighed in relief, waiting a few moments before I sneaked through the crowd of people. I made my way back to the little office through the sitting room. It was completely vacant, as everyone was dancing. My heels clicked off the floor as I hurriedly turned into the office. Lucien sat casually against the desk, catching me off guard.

  “Ah, there you are. I thought you had forgotten about me, already,” he smiled, standing and bowing to me.

  He then walked over to me slowly, gently taking my hand as he carefully closed the door behind me. The little click from the lock filled the room, shutting out the music humming from the orchestra. We were so close to the outside world yet in our own little world.

  My heart skipped at the touch of his hand. My chest heaved for air and very noticeable under my own gaze. My low cut gown worried me for the first time and the attention I could get for it.

  He led me to the center of the room, looking to our hands. “You are shivering.”

  I followed his gaze to our hands before I looked back up to him, his eyes meeting with mine as his other hand softly rested against my cheek.

  “Are you all right?” his voice cooed, making my whole body shudder underneath all the shivers rattling me.

  I nodded extremely lightly, worried that if my movement was too large, his hand would fall from my cheek, but it stayed firmly in place. That sensuous smile pulled at his mou
th.

  “Good,” he said, his voice hovering over that tone and making me shiver. It was in between a whisper and a normal volume of speaking—a lowered coo that drove me mad with delight. Then, he continued titillating me further, “Madeleine…has anyone told you how beautiful you are?”

  My face flushed as I looked away from him, smiling. “Not today, no,” I said, very cavalier. In truth, I never took notice of the few compliments I ever received. They were always from older women who missed their own youth.

  He smirked, raising my chin up and looking my face over. “Your skin…looks almost as if it has never been touched by sunlight. These eyes of yours are like the violet of a Paris sunset. Not quite violet, not quite blue.”

  I looked into his own amazing eyes—those dizzying spellbinders—and my body went very still as he leaned into me slowly. His lips found mine easily and pressing sweetly against them. He hunched his shoulders down as his taller upper body leaned into my shorter one. His hand fell down to my jaw line as his other fell from my own and took hold of my waist, pulling me into him.

  I could have screamed in delight. The very scent of Lucien filled my nose and mixed with my own, swirling around me as I grabbed hold of him tightly—that same fistful of fabric from his waistcoat as before.

  He didn’t break away from me abruptly. He transitioned from me. The passion between us cooled off to a simmer as his lips continuously brushed against my own. He finally pulled away from me and panting hard along with me.

  “I do not,” he started, taking a moment as my hands smoothed up to his neck, “think there is a sin as great as this.”

  He suddenly looked up to the door, voices and laughter pushing against it before the music grew louder and the voices disappeared. He sighed in relief as his hands fell to my waist.

  “We should probably get down to business. I fear our seclusion will be short-lived.” He looked to me before continuing. “Madeleine, no doubt, people will inquire about the woman I am interested in. They already are, but I wish them to not know which woman that is.”