by Gerri Hill
“Got a call today,” she said as nonchalantly as possible. “From Winter Park.” She felt Morgan’s fingers tighten slightly against her own.
“Oh, yeah?”
“Seems the mayor and his wife got a divorce. He moved to Denver, and, well, they want me to come back.”
She stared at Morgan, trying to judge her reaction. The cheerful smile Morgan flashed couldn’t hide the misgiving in her eyes.
“How wonderful! I know you liked it there.”
Reese nodded. “Yeah, I did. And I know the people there.”
“Well, I think that’s great.” She squeezed Reese’s hand. “And you know, maybe you and the mayor’s wife can try it again,” she teased.
Reese didn’t say anything as Morgan got up. She pointed to the steaks.
“Do you mind putting those on? I want to grab a quick shower.”
Reese nodded. “Sure.”
She didn’t know what to make of Morgan’s reaction. Her cheerfulness was forced, she could tell that. But she’d thought perhaps Morgan might ask her to stay. Oh, well. Maybe she’d read too much into their relationship. Maybe Morgan wasn’t going to be all that upset when she left after all.
Maybe she wouldn’t even miss her.
§
Morgan barely made it into the bathroom before her heart broke completely. She leaned on the counter, taking deep breaths. It wasn’t supposed to hurt this much. It wasn’t like it was unexpected. But it was July. Three more months to live with the knowledge that Reese was going back to Winter Park.
She met her eyes in the mirror, letting her tears fall without even trying to stop them. Broken hearts deserved tears, at least.
But when the tears turned to sobs, she quickly shed her clothes and stepped into the shower, letting the warm water wash her tears away. She had no idea how she was going to make it through dinner. She could barely make it through a shower.
She sobbed again, leaning against the wall and wrapping her arms around herself, praying the pain would go away.
It didn’t.
Going through the motions of dinner was the hardest thing she’d ever had to do. Trying to appear as though everything were perfectly normal, perfectly fine. Trying to make conversation without crying. She couldn’t look at Reese. She knew if she looked into her eyes she would break down. She knew she would make a complete fool of herself and beg her to stay. So she put on a brave face, smiling to the extreme she knew, but it was the only way to keep from crying. Reese didn’t comment on her behavior. In fact, Reese seemed far too quiet. Perhaps it was because Morgan was chatting away, pulling subjects out of the air, anything to avoid a lull in the conversation where they might have to actually talk about something that mattered.
Like Reese leaving.
And later, after they’d both pushed the food around on their plates, after she’d cleaned up dinner while Reese showered, she crawled into bed beside Reese, moving into her arms, relishing what she knew would be their last night together. She just couldn’t go on pretending any longer. No, she would end this affair. She didn’t think she could survive if she didn’t.
Even now, as Reese rolled them over, as she settled her weight between her thighs, Morgan felt her heart breaking a little more, felt tears sting her eyes. She pulled Reese close, letting her lips move across her skin, memorizing her taste, her smell. She squeezed her eyes shut.
I love you.
But there were no words spoken as they made love to each other. Reese’s hands were strong, familiar, as they moved across her body, touching her in all the secret places that only Reese knew. Morgan felt a tear slide down her face as Reese suckled her breast, gently and tenderly loving her. Morgan arched into her, opening her legs, inviting Reese inside.
As Reese’s fingers filled her, they moved together slowly, effortlessly. Morgan pulled Reese’s mouth from her breast, bringing her to her lips, her tongue sliding over Reese’s before sucking it inside her mouth. She heard Reese moan, felt her hips buck against her own, forcing Reese’s fingers deeper inside her.
She wanted to make it last, she wanted to feel Reese within her forever, but much too soon her orgasm threatened, her hips moving faster and faster as Reese rhythmically thrust inside her.
But Reese suddenly stopped, pulling her fingers away as she moved down Morgan’s body.
“Yes ,” she breathed. “With your mouth.”
This, too, she didn’t have time to savor. Reese cupped her hips, bringing Morgan to her waiting mouth. But Morgan was so ready, so close, that only the briefest of touches from Reese’s tongue pushed her over the edge. She squeezed her legs tight, holding Reese to her, crying out as Reese sucked her clit into her mouth.
“Oh, God, Reese,” she cried, her head falling back against the pillow as Reese continued to suckle her. She closed her eyes tight, giving in to the feel of Reese’s mouth on her, her tongue moving inside her. She came again, her hips lifting off the bed, pressing against Reese’s mouth as Reese drained the last breath from her.
“Reese—” she whispered, her voice thick with unshed tears.
I love you.
§
Morgan stirred as the ringing of the phone woke her. Reese pulled away, blindly reaching out for it. Morgan’s eyes slipped shut again as she listened to Reese’s voice. There was no urgency, so she wasn’t worried about the early morning phone call. She was too tired. Their lovemaking had taken them well past midnight.
“I’ve got to go,” Reese said as she bent down and kissed Morgan, her lips lingering.
“What’s wrong?” she asked sleepily.
“Thompson’s got some cattle out. They want me to block off the road, that’s all.” Reese kissed her again. “Go back to sleep.”
“Uh-huh,” she murmured as she rolled over, snuggling against Reese’s pillow. She never heard Reese leave as she drifted off to sleep, but she woke only a short time later, feeling the emptiness of the bed.
And the emptiness of her heart.
She tossed off the covers and got up, rubbing her tired eyes as she shuffled into the bathroom. It would do no good to linger here. She would take a quick shower and pack her things…and go home. Except that it felt like she was leaving home. She doubted her little Forest Service house would ever feel like home again.
She tried not to think as she moved from room to room, picking up her things. The red robe that hung behind the door in the bathroom. Her toothbrush. Jeans and shirts. A few paperback books. The framed picture of her and Jackson that she’d brought over. In the kitchen, she spotted the corkscrew she’d bought so that they wouldn’t have to use Reese’s Swiss Army knife anymore.
She smiled as she held it, the smile soon disappearing as tears took its place. She put the corkscrew back, leaving it for Reese.
She took one last look around, her eyes swimming in tears.
There was no need to leave a note.
CHAPTER FORTY-ONE
Reese pulled to a stop beside her cabin, hoping Morgan’s truck would be there. She hadn’t been able to reach her all day.
Each time she called, it went to voice mail. She finally got hold of Charlie.
“Oh, she’s out and about. You know cell service is iffy up in the mountains.”
So she’d left it at that, even though she had an uneasy feeling all day. The only thing normal about last night was when they made love. But dinner was strained, conversation forced. And oddly, no mention of her leaving. She’d have thought they would have at least discussed it. Something. But no. Morgan acted as if Reese had never mentioned Winter Park.
She went inside and closed the door and it struck her immediately. It was empty. She tilted her head, listening to the quiet. She made herself move, going into their bedroom, seeing the empty space where Jackson’s picture used to sit. She swallowed hard, then moved to the bathroom, looking at the empty hook behind the door where Morgan’s robe usually hung.
“So, just like that,” she said.
She couldn’t believe the heavine
ss of her heart, couldn’t believe how much it hurt to know Morgan had left. To know Morgan wasn’t coming back.
CHAPTER FORTY-TWO
“This is insane.”
“Stop it.”
“I’m just saying—”
“I know what you’re saying, Tina. But it doesn’t matter. This is best.”
“If you don’t talk to her, I will.”
Morgan whipped her head around. “Don’t you dare.”
“So it’s going to be like this for the next three months? You not answering your phone? You staying out in the woods until dark? Me and Berta and Charlie having to lie for you?”
“She’s not stupid, Tina. She knows why I left. And she’ll leave it alone. And then we can pretend that nothing was ever between us, and should we meet here at Sloan’s, we’ll be civil to each other and when November gets here, she’ll leave for good. And hopefully by then, I’ll be over her.” Morgan knew she’d never be over Reese, but she wasn’t going to tell Tina this. She’d avoided Reese for two days. She figured that was all Reese would give her.
Tonight, Reese would find her. And she didn’t want it to be alone.
So she’d made Tina come with her to Sloan’s. She would speak privately with Reese, sure. But she didn’t want to be alone.
“You two haven’t been in here together in a long time,” Tracy said. “Where’s Reese?”
Morgan glanced at Tina. “We’re kinda, well, we kinda cooled things off,” Morgan said.
Tina shook her head. “Reese got an offer from Winter Park to get her old job back. She’s leaving, so Morgan bailed.”
“Tina, please,” Morgan whispered.
“It’s just Tracy. Like I’m not going to fill her in later anyway.”
“So she’s really leaving? I thought you two were so good together. I mean, you seemed so happy,” Tracy said.
“Happy? Yes. We always knew it was temporary though. She was planning on leaving in November whether Winter Park called or not,” Morgan said. “I just thought it was better to end things now. No sense—” But her voice trailed away as Reese walked in the door, their eyes meeting across the room. Morgan’s heart skipped a beat and she had a difficult time catching her breath.
“Hi, ladies,” Reese said as she walked over.
“Get you a beer, Chief?”
“Sure, Tracy. Thanks.”
Reese stood beside Morgan, but Morgan purposefully kept her gaze away. Reese finally touched her shoulder. “Can we talk?”
Morgan wanted to say no, but she knew she at least owed Reese an explanation. Tina moved to get up, but Morgan stopped her. “We’ll go to a booth,” she said.
She kept her hands folded together on the table, unable to look at Reese. If she looked at her, all her brave words would mean nothing. She’d spent most of the day trying to harden her heart, knowing that was the only way to get through this.
“What’s up, Morgan?” Reese asked quietly.
“What do you mean?”
“Come on, you know what I mean.”
Morgan cleared her throat, still not meeting Reese’s eyes.
“You’ll be leaving soon. I’m sure you have a lot of things to take care of. Packing to do.”
“No. I don’t have that much to pack.”
Morgan finally looked at her, trying so hard to keep her gaze steady. “Well, honestly, I just didn’t see the point of going on like we were. I mean, I had a good time and all, but it’s time to put an end to it.” She shrugged. “It’s over. We had our fun.”
“Just like that? I don’t get a say in it?”
Morgan tried to smile. “You laid the ground rules, Reese. And I think you said if one of us no longer enjoyed it, we could stop.”
Reese stared at her. “So you’re stopping because you didn’t enjoy it any longer?” She leaned closer. “Is that why you screamed my name when we made love that last night? Because you no longer enjoyed it?”
“Sex is sex, Reese,” she said cruelly. “We can find it anywhere. Like you with the mayor’s wife or me with a cute tourist. It’s time to move on.” She tried to ignore the pain she saw in Reese’s eyes.
Her words hurt, she knew. And they were uncalled for. But she didn’t want to be the only one hurting.
Reese stood up. “Well, you just made leaving a hell of a lot easier. Thanks.”
Morgan watched her go, surprised she was able to stop herself from running after her. She shook her head when Tina would have come over. She didn’t want to talk. She got up slowly, not looking at anyone as she walked out the door.
Once home, she locked the door and stripped off her clothes and crawled into bed.
And she cried.
She cried for all that was lost and all that could have been.
She cried because she was alone and she missed Jackson. She cried because her heart ached like it had never ached before.
She cried because she was in love. And she cried because she’d intentionally hurt the one person she cared most about in the world. The person she wanted to spend the rest of her life with.
The person who was walking out of her world.
So she cried.
CHAPTER FORTY-THREE
“I’m sorry, Ron, but it’s only a few months. Googan can handle things.”
“We don’t want Googan to handle things, Chief. You agreed to stay until November.”
“They offered me the job now. I can’t turn it down,” she said.
“Look, I understand Lake City is not Winter Park. I understand the limitations we have here. But a contract is a contract. They have their own interim police chief. A few more months won’t hurt them either.”
Reese knew Brightmen would never go for her leaving early, but she at least wanted to try. She had to get away. She couldn’t sleep at night. She couldn’t stand the emptiness of the cabin. And each time she saw Morgan in town, she felt a tightness in her chest she didn’t understand.
Oh, hell, who was she kidding? She understood it perfectly. It was called love, something she didn’t have a whole lot of experience with. She shouldn’t be surprised she’d fallen in love with Morgan. All those months of playing house, of making love, of being together, how could she not? The months she’d spent with Morgan were the happiest of her life. And they had come to a screeching halt.
Because Morgan had no trouble leaving her. Morgan had no trouble ending things. Morgan was going on about her life.
She wasn’t pining for her. She wasn’t suffering though sleepless nights because Reese wasn’t in her bed. She wasn’t dreading going home to an empty house. No. She ended things as easily as she’d started them with no remorse or heartache.
Why she ended things early, Reese still couldn’t understand.
It was too good between them, despite Morgan’s words that sex was sex. When they were together, it was just so right. Did Morgan suspect that Reese had fallen in love? Did Morgan run because of that?
CHAPTER FORTY-FOUR
“I swear I’ve never seen you like this.”
Morgan looked up from the monthly budget report she was reviewing and offered Charlie a weak smile. “Sorry. I’ll be fine.”
“Come into my office, Morgan.”
Morgan took a deep breath and let it out slowly. Charlie was playing the father figure, she knew. But she just wasn’t in the mood to talk about it.
“Close the door,” he said as she followed him in. “Now, you want to tell me what’s going on? I’ve heard bits and pieces from Tina and Berta, but I’d rather hear it from you.”
She shrugged. “Reese is leaving. We ended things. That’s it.”
“Yeah, I heard Winter Park offered her a job. Ron Brightmen said Reese had called asking out of her contract so she could leave now.”
Morgan’s eyes widened. Wow. Reese couldn’t wait to get out of here, could she? Oh, well. The sooner the better. She’d just as soon not have to spend the next three months avoiding her at Sloan’s.
“Anyway, I got something I want
to talk to you about.” He leaned back in his chair and smiled. “You know, I’m out of here at the end of August.”
“You don’t have to remind me, Charlie. The calendar with the big Xs on it does just fine.”
He laughed. “When you get close to retirement after nearly thirty years, you’ll be marking off the days too.”
“I’m happy for you. I really am. It’s just, for us, they’re going to bring in some old blowhard with rules, and I’ll have to go back to wearing those god-awful uniforms again.”
“Well, then that’s where I think you’ll be happy.” He passed her a letter to read. “I recommended you for the job, Morgan. They agreed.”
“What? Me?” She glanced at the letter, words jumping out at her—promotion, manager, new budget, new position. She looked up.
“What the hell?”
“You deserve it. You put in your time. Plus, as I pointed out to them, you know the area, you know the people.”
“Yeah, but I don’t know anything about running this office, Charlie. How am I going to put together a budget each year? And those damn monthly reports you have to send in, how am I—”
“Oh, hell, Morgan, you already do the work. I just put it all together. It’s mostly BS paperwork anyway. You know that.”
She stood and walked across the room, still holding the letter. To say she was floored, to say she was shocked was an understatement. It never even occurred to her that they would promote her. She was too young, she was a female, and she only had fifteen years in the service. All strikes against her. She turned slowly and smiled at him. “Damn.”
“I also got a new full-time position approved. I know we don’t need it in the winter, but in the summer, you run yourself ragged. And knowing you, you’re not going to sit your ass in this chair like I do. You’re going to want to be out.”
“When I first started here, you were out too, Charlie.”
He nodded. “Until I knew I could trust you to do all the things that needed to get done.”