by Allie Kay
“Oh! Can we? Please? Can we?” Mateo bounced beside me.
“Okay, okay,” Joy said with a laugh as she gave in. “Why not? Not like there’s much else to do but watch the snow fall.”
“Do you have flour and salt? A lot of salt?”
“Maybe?” She looked uncertain. “I know I have flour and some salt, but I don’t know if it is a lot.”
“I’ll be right back.” I grabbed my jacket.
“Mr. Jack?”
“Yeah, buddy.” I stopped to look at him.
“Whiles you are at your house, you might want to shave. Because you are starting to look like a homeless person and I don’t think Mama will want to kiss you no more if you look homeless.” He dropped his voice to a mock whisper, “She might even make you go live under a bridge.”
“You think so?” Jack finally gasped out after a hearty laugh. “I didn’t realize my face looked that bad.”
“It doesn’t,” Joy whispered. Amusement shone bright in her eyes. “I kinda like the beard you’ve been growing.”
I pulled her close and nuzzled my beard against her throat. “Oh yeah?”
“Ingredients for the ‘hornaments’, now.” She pushed me a way with a laugh and a look that said we could revisit this later.
“Yes, Miss Bossy-Pants.” I saluted her, stepping away just in time to keep her from swatting me.
I trekked through the snow to my half of the house, grabbed the container of salt, and headed back. The snow was piling up. There was probably a good four inches piled up already and the white sky still shimmered with falling flakes.
We spent the rest of the afternoon kneading and rolling and cutting tiny ornaments from the salty dough we mixed up. Mateo only tried one little nibble before deciding perhaps this wasn’t an eating dough but strictly for looks only.
“Which one’s your favorite?” Mateo asked from his perch on the island. “I like to make the bells. Bells are fun. They say ding dong ding dong.”
“Hmm… I like the reindeers.” Joy cut another reindeer and put them on the sheet tray with the others to be baked. “What about you, Jack?”
“The angel.”
“Why?” Mateo asked, curiosity written all over his flour-dusted face. “Cause they have wings? I like the wings too. They’re my second favorite.”
“They remind me of my mom. Angels were always her favorite. We’d make these ornaments every year. It was a tradition. And each year she’d pick a theme for how we were decorating them all. One year, she thought gold glitter would be nice, thinking the glitter would sink into the dough and sorta stick there. It didn’t. I don’t know if we did something wrong, if it was the type of glitter or what, but that glitter got all over our house and in the oven, in our hair. It was such a mess.
“My dad came home from work and looked around. He told her he was disappointed in her—that if she was going to hire a stripper she should have waited for him. She sputtered and coughed until he burst out laughing. He laughed so hard he fell to the floor. She joined him and drug me and Melissa into it with them. It was the best day.”
“Sounds fun.” Joy laid a hand on my arm. “You should call them. I’ll sit with you, if you need the support.”
One corner of my mouth lifted briefly into a sort of half-smile. I swallowed hard. It had been years since I’d seen or talked to my family. They might have changed their number for all I knew.
“They don’t want to hear from me.”
“You don’t know that until you try. When was the last time you tried?”
“Five or six years ago.” I had tried to call my mom for Mother’s Day and my dad had intervened, telling me not to call again. I hadn’t tried since that day.
“You should call them.”
“Okay, I’ll try, but don’t be surprised when this goes badly.” I slid my phone out of my back pocket. I dialed their number and it rang. Once. Twice. Halfway through the third ring, I heard it.
A voice I hadn’t heard in years now and tears came to my eyes.
“Hello?” A moment of silence. “Is someone there?”
“Hi, Mom.” I closed my eyes, trying to keep the tears from falling.
“Timmy, is that you?”
“Yeah, it’s me. How—” My voice broke and I had to clear my throat. “How are you?”
“I’m okay. How are you? You sober?”
“Yes, I’m good. I’m out. Sober.”
“We heard you got released back last summer. Took you long enough to call me.”
“I wasn’t sure you wanted to hear from me, but I had some prodding.”
“Oh? Well, thank her for me.”
I chuckled. “How’d you know it was a her?”
“A mother just knows. Where are you staying? With her?”
“I live in a little town called Garden Falls, it’s on the other side of the state. After, well, you know, I needed a new start. I’m going to stay here. But maybe y’all can come out and visit sometime.”
“We’ll see. You know how your father is. We may have to work up to it.” She sighed. “He’s coming in now, so let me get off here. I’ll ease him into it. Is this a good number to reach you on?”
“It’s my cell number.”
“Okay, well, you be good.”
The line went dead. “I love you, Mom,” I whispered to the empty line.
“So, was that as bad as you imagined?” Joy asked.
“Yes. No.” I shrugged. “Both?”
“Men.” She shook her head.
“You know you love me.” I pulled her into my arms. My lips covered hers, rocking gently over her lips until she sighed. When her lips parted, I deepened the kiss.
She wrapped her arms around my neck and pressed her chest against mine. My hold on her tightened as our bodies touched and arousal burned through me. Blood rushed south and my jeans tightened.
“Ahem.” Tap. Tap. Tap. “Ahem. Stop kissing so we can make more ornaments. Are you even listening to me? I said Ahem!”
Reluctantly, I broke the kiss, trailing my lips along her jawline. Nibbling her ear, I muttered, “Your kid is probably the cutest little cockblock ever.”
“Hush.” Her cheeks pinked up.
“To be continued after little man’s bedtime?” I arched a brow in question.
She nodded.
27
Jack
When we woke up with no power, we had little choice but to venture out in search of food. Mateo, of course, wanted doughnuts. But as much as I loved Doughnut Dani’s, it was just too much sweet for me. Instead, I managed to talk Mateo, and Joy, into breakfast at Lake Street Diner.
A little hole-in-the-wall sort of place that Sean had turned me on to, Lake Street Diner had the best steak omelets around. Huge. Cheap. And good service. The worn booths and faded tiles hinted at how long the Parker family had been serving up their hearty home-style grub to the good people of Garden Falls.
I pushed back my nearly empty plate and downed the last of my coffee. Joy still nibbled at the pecan pancakes she’d ordered. Mateo had chocolate all over his face, having opted for chocolate syrup over maple.
“Excuse me for a minute. I’m going to … uh… take care of some business while you guys finish up.” I stood and walked to the restroom in the front corner of the restaurant.
When I came back a few minutes later, Joy sat at the table alone.
“Where’s Mateo?” she said, looking around the restaurant for her son.
“I was about to ask you the same thing.” I didn’t sit down. I looked toward the front, glancing at the floor under the tables.
“He said he had to pee and I thought since you were in there, I’d let him go in the men’s room this time.” She stood and started toward the front. “Maybe he’s still in there?”
“Joy, it’s a single restroom. Unless he went in after me…” I half ran to the restroom and jerked the door open. The light was off, like I’d left it. But I flicked it on to be sure. Empty.
“Mateo!” Joy sho
uted, spinning in a circle. “Has anyone seen my son? He’s four. Blond. Wearing a green jacket and jeans? Please?”
I stepped out the door. I looked up and down the sidewalk. No Mateo. I ran to my truck and checked inside the cab, in the bed. No Mateo.
My heart was racing when I opened the diner door. “He’s not outside either.”
“I know.” Joy had tears in her eyes. She waved a hand at an older couple who’d been sitting at one of the front-most tables. “They said he left with a red-headed man who he called Father. Ricky has him,” she said, panic tinting her breathless voice.
“Mother fucker!” I slapped a hand down on the counter. I swallowed hard when every ounce of that steak omelet tried to make a reappearance. “Has anyone called 9-1-1 yet?”
Joy nodded and those tears spilled over. She stepped up to me and buried her face against my chest.
I didn’t know what to do. What to say… I wrapped my arms around her and whispered, “I’m sorry.” Sorry didn’t cut it.
A whirlwind of emotion spiraled through my tense frame. I’d brought her here—brought Mateo—to this very diner. I’d promised her that I’d help protect her son from Ricky. Failure and guilt warred with hot swirls of anger.
I swallowed hard. How could she stand my touch right now? Surely when she thought about it she’d be repulsed by me. When my role, however unintentional, in Mateo’s disappearance became more clear, she’d want me nowhere near her. I knew it.
Sirens wailed in front of the diner. The sound sent a sudden chill down my spine. I watched through the plate glass window as the officers headed inside, one a familiar face.
“Jack.” Officer Jess Taylor nodded at me. I’d met the woman several times this past summer and fall. She was a friend of Talia’s family, and now, by extension, a friend of Sean’s. “What happened here?”
Joy looked up from my chest, eyes already bloodshot. “He took my baby.” She paused, overcome by emotion. “Ricky took Mateo.” She shook her head and buried her face once again against my chest.
I kissed the top of her head and murmured a reassurance that even I wasn’t sure I could believe. Looking up at Jess, I spoke the rest of what Joy hadn’t said. “This is Joy. Her four-year-old son went missing. According to what they’ve said”— I nodded toward the older couple— “her uh, estranged, husband, Ricky, has taken him.”
“Where were the two of you when he went missing?” she asked.
“I was in the restroom. Joy was at the table with Mateo when I walked away. She thought he was coming to me. I didn’t know to watch for him. Ricky must have grabbed him then. Mateo was gone when I came out of the bathroom.” My voice broke. Something seemed to be jammed in my throat. I cleared my throat and tried hard to swallow that lump. “Mateo was just gone,” I choked out.
“Can you call his father?” the other officer asked. I didn’t know him. The tag on his shirt read Gonzalez. “Rule out a simple misunderstanding.”
“It’s not that simple!” Joy shrieked. “Ricky’s probably already stopped somewhere with him. Blood is probably pouring from my baby’s nose and mouth where his so-called father smacked him in the face for my choices. Because I tried to get us away.” She gulped for breath. “If Mateo’s lucky, seeing his bloodied face will be enough to satisfy Ricky for the night. But he’s never not had me there to bear the brunt of his father’s anger.” She sobbed. “I’ve never not been there for Mateo. Never.”
She sank to the floor in tears, wrapping her arms around her knees. I’d never seen anyone look so vulnerable. So raw.
“Jack. What can you tell us about this guy? Anything we could use to try to track him down?” Jess asked. Her compassionate gaze fell on Joy. “If he gets out of town with Mateo, or worse, out of state…”
I wracked my brain for any information that could be useful. “I know they are from Ohio. He threw a brick through the window on her new place last month. He was driving a silver rental. Four door. Small. Maybe a Ford Fiesta or Focus. I’m not sure. And that was a while ago, so he could be in something else by now.” I closed my eyes tight and tried to picture the man from memory. “He’s got red curly hair that’s kinda long. Pretty slim, but has a beer gut.” I paused, thinking for anything else helpful. “Mateo’s four. He has dark blond hair. He had on a white Batman t-shirt with a green jacket.”
I ran my hands through my hair. What else could I tell them? I knew so little about Joy. About Mateo.
“Okay, let’s start with the local motels. Check the campgrounds too. But if he’s in a rental car, I doubt he’s at the campgrounds. Get a checkpoint out by the interstate.” Jess spurred the other officer into action. She squatted down next to Joy. “Ma’am, can you come with me? I’d like to take you down to the police station and get your official statement.”
Joy looked up at her and the look in her eyes made me stagger back. Never in my life had I seen such hurt. Such raw pain. Not even at a funeral. She slowly rose to her feet, wobbling slightly.
Jess nodded at me. “I’ll take her down to the station. Do me a favor and follow us down there. I think she’s gonna need the support of a familiar face.”
28
Joy
I paced between the desks at the police station. From the wall with the posters of the current most-wanteds across the dingy tile to the window half-filled with a discolored window air conditioner and back again. My muscles twitched every time I tried to sit. So, I moved, hoping that I could ease the restlessness. Nothing would quell the panic in my thoughts.
Ricky had my baby.
Voices droned on around me. Phones rang. Sirens wailed occasionally from outside the cement block walls. But no little hands tugged at mine to beg me to pick him up. No little giggles tickled my ears. And no tiny arms wrapped tightly around my neck.
I should have ran once I knew Ricky was in town. Gathered up my precious boy and high-tailed it to the next town instead of staying here, flirting with the idea of a relationship with Jack, craving the stability of a home and friends. Maybe if I’d put safety over my heart, I could have avoided this.
I could picture Ricky now, his belt in hand. He’d have already begun punishing my sweet baby for our disappearance. I shuddered at the thought of him whipping Mateo. My poor baby. He’d already been through more than any child should have.
“Can I use this phone?” I asked the female officer who’d came out to the diner, who’d brought me here.
“Have an idea?” the officer asked softly. She lifted the receiver and punched a couple buttons. “Dial your number now.”
“I remembered Ricky’s cell phone number. Thought I’d see if he’d answer.” I pushed in the number slowly, heart racing.
It rang once. Halfway through the second ring, the ring stopped abruptly.
“Hello,” I said around the giant lump in my throat.
“I wondered when you’d get up the balls to call, you adulterous whore.” Even through the phone line, the ice in Ricky’s voice sent chills down my spine. And the laugh? I was shaking before the last peals ended. “I knew you’d want this brat, if nothing else.”
I cringed at his words. “Ricky, please…”
“Oh, you will be begging me if you want him back. On your knees with my cock in your mouth, bitch. Did you fuck him? That arrogant looking prick you’ve been whoring around with? I know you’re living with him. When’d you meet him?” Ricky’s voice was short, clipped.
“I just want Mateo back.”
The officer waved at me and pointed at a legal pad where she’d written “Where are you?”.
“We don’t always get what we want, do we?” Ricky laughed. “Particularly when we are dumb blondes who think they’re smart, huh?”
“Where are you?” I asked, trying to stay calm. Trying to keep from crying again.
Ricky was quiet for several seconds. “Where you aren’t.”
“Clearly, I can see that.” I rubbed the bridge of my nose, silently cursing myself when my fingers came away wet. “But where ar
e you? Where’s Mateo?”
“You gonna come to me? I haven’t got to fuck in three damn months now. You come over here, you better be ready for me to ride you ‘til you’re raw and then do it again. I’ve never known such a sorry wife. Can’t even meet her husband’s needs and running off with my son to boot. Bitch, that’s my only child. Barren fucking slut, we should have had several kids by now.”
I cast a glance at the police officer. She stood so close that surely she’d heard every word Ricky’d shouted. Heat rose in my cheeks. Ricky thought I was barren, but what he didn’t know was that I’d been getting birth control shots at the health department in the next town since just after Mateo was born. I couldn’t risk bringing another child into the hell I lived in daily.
The legal pad waved in front of me again.
“Yes, I’ll come to you. But I need to know where you are. And I’ll have to walk because I don’t have my car with me.” I swallowed hard. Ricky might kill me when I got there, but maybe the police could get Mateo before he saw his mother beaten again. Get him to safety.
“Staying at some dumbass motel overlooking the lake. This stupid town thinks that damn lake is something, don’t they?”
I snatched the legal pad from the officer’s outstretched hand and grabbed a pen from the organizer on the desk. “What’s the address of the motel? I don’t know my way around Garden Falls much just yet.”
“Uh… Hang on.” Ricky shuffled around and then started reeling off an address. “Lakeside Motel, 125 Lake Street. Room 18. You have twenty minutes or I start warming up on the brat.”
I scribbled the address down on the pad. “Where is Mateo? Is he with you?” I held my breath awaiting his answer.
“You think I drove all this way to leave the little inconvenience on the side of the road? Stupid whore. Time’s a-ticking.” The line went dead.