I loved that he used ‘we’. I saw Hedgehog Hollow – both the farm and the rescue centre – as ours and was touched that he felt part of it too.
‘I want to get some more mange off Ripley and Gollum before I start on dinner.’ We took it in turns to cook and sometimes prepared a meal together but Josh had been the chef for the last few nights and it was only fair that I took my turn. I didn’t relish it, though. The thought of cooking made my stomach churn.
‘How about I make dinner while you finish off here?’ Josh suggested.
I smiled gratefully. ‘You’re sure? Because that would be amazing.’
‘I’m hungry and you’re busy so it’s logical that way.’
‘Thank you. I really appreciate it.’
Josh was taking his last mouthful of dinner when his phone rang with an emergency callout.
‘Hopefully I won’t be too long,’ he said, pushing his chair back from the kitchen table. He frowned at my barely touched meal. ‘Are you okay? You’ve hardly eaten anything.’
My head was still thumping and I could feel my cheeks burning. ‘Sorry. I’m just a bit tired after a few days of solid concentration so I’m on a go-slow. I will eat some more, though. It’s really tasty.’
‘Why don’t you put your feet up afterwards and watch a film?’
That sounded really good. ‘I’ve got about an hour’s prep to do for tomorrow and I need to do some flyers for Briony but I’ll maybe do those while watching a film.’
‘Good.’ He gave me a gentle kiss then left.
I put the kettle on and stood by the window while it boiled, watching Josh’s jeep disappearing down the farm track. Some fresh air might do me good.
The temperature had dropped so I wrapped up warm and took my mug of tea outside. I wanted to tell Thomas and Gwendoline about Katniss and the great progress that Gollum had made.
As I approached Thomas’s bench, spots started swimming before my eyes and the ground felt like it was about to jump up at me. My pulse raced and I felt sweat prickle my forehead and upper lip. Don’t faint. Not while you’re alone. My mug slipped from my hand and smashed on the gravel, soaking my canvas shoes and scalding my bare ankles. I swayed and grabbed onto the wall, taking deep breaths, willing myself to stay conscious. I stumbled towards the bench and managed to lie down with my feet up on the arm rest. More deep breaths. The sensation was unsettling – like the feeling you get when you’ve been on a boat but still feel like you’re bobbing once you return to dry land. I held the back of my shaky hand against my burning forehead and shuddered as a wave of heat swept over my body from head to toe.
And then it stopped.
I lay there for several minutes as my heartrate slowed, my skin cooled, my stomach settled. Where had that come from? I’d never fainted before. I bit my lip, feeling completely unnerved by it. What if I’d hit my head as I fell? I didn’t like to dwell on the thought of being all alone and unconscious. Shivering now, I pulled my cardigan round me and ever so slowly lowered my feet onto the bench, then onto the ground, then gently eased myself into a seated position making sure my head was the last thing I raised.
My ankles throbbed and I looked down at the angry red streaks across them from my spilt tea. Fortunately, my shoes had taken the brunt of it.
Misty-Blue jumped up beside me. ‘Hello you,’ I said, stroking her back. ‘I was wondering where you’d got to. Have you come to make sure I’m okay?’
She nudged my arm, purring. ‘That was a scary moment,’ I told her. ‘Don’t tell Josh. He’ll tell Lauren and they’ll make me take some more time off.’
I closed my eyes for a moment. Would that be such a bad thing? I’d be able to spend my days with the hedgehogs. Opening my eyes once more, I looked down at my cat.
‘The problem is,’ I told her, ‘if I take some more time off, I’ll never want to return. And if I don’t return, I’ll be letting Lauren down and my colleagues down and, most of all, I’ll be letting Thomas and Gwendoline down because I need my teaching salary to keep the rescue centre running.’
I shivered again. Time to retreat indoors and tend to my scalds. Maybe I’d relax with a film after that and do my prep later.
Rising slowly from the bench, I took a few tentative steps towards the farmhouse. Pieces of smashed mug were scattered across the gravel. My favourite mug. How typical was that? It was tempting to leave it for now but I didn’t want Misty-Blue to step on any sharp edges so I bent down to pick up the pieces, praying the effort wouldn’t make me dizzy again.
Misty-Blue followed me into the farmhouse and watched as I placed the remnants of my mug in the kitchen bin. She nudged my legs and mewed. ‘Yes, yes, I’ll feed you but you have to promise not to tell Josh. It’s not like I actually fainted. I just had a one-off dizzy spell. That’s all.’
I hoped.
11
Samantha
The following day, I felt a little brighter although I couldn’t help but wonder if that was because the weekend was approaching, which meant more time with Josh and the hedgehogs.
I had watched a film last night although I hadn’t fully relaxed as I’d prepared the flyers for Briony which I placed in her pigeonhole first thing. Hopefully I’d get plenty of entries.
During afternoon break, I checked my phone as I walked back to the department office and was surprised to see five missed calls from a local number, although no voicemail messages had been left. I stepped outside to return the call.
‘Hi there. My name’s Samantha Wishaw. I’ve got five missed calls from this number.’
‘Are you the hedgehog rescuer?’ The woman on the end of the phone sounded angry.
I sat down on a low wall in front of the building. ‘Yes. I run Hedgehog Hollow.’
‘About time! I've been trying you all afternoon. Don’t you ever answer your phone?’
I flinched at her harsh tone but chose to ignore her comments. ‘How can I help?’
‘I need you to collect a hedgehog from Fimberley.’
‘Can I ask what’s wrong with it?’
‘How the bloody hell should I know? I’m not a vet.’
I took a deep breath so I could keep my response calm. ‘I appreciate that. I just mean what promoted you to call? Is the hedgehog bleeding, for example?’
‘No. So can you be here in the next fifteen minutes?’
Further details about what was wrong with the hedgehog were clearly not forthcoming. It was 2.45 p.m. now and college didn’t finish till four. ‘I can be with you between quarter past and half past four.’
‘That’s no good. I’m leaving for my holidays in half an hour.’
‘I’m really sorry but I can’t get there sooner. Is there any—’
She cut me short. ‘I’ll shove it in a box on my doorstep. It’s 11 Finton Row. I’ve done my bit now so it’ll be your fault if it dies.’ Then she hung up.
My stomach churned as I quickly typed the address into the Notes app on my phone before it slipped my mind. I hated confrontations. Why were some people like that? Maybe she was one of those people who got stressed and nervous before going on holiday. There was no need to take it out on me, though. I was none the wiser as to what had prompted her to call me and that made me nervous. No blood was a good thing but that didn’t mean there wasn’t cause for concern.
I pulled up outside a row of small whitewashed cottages in Fimberley ninety minutes later. None of them had front gardens, the doors opening straight out onto the lane. I spotted number eleven before I clocked the house number thanks to a multipack crisps box on the doorstep.
Opening the car door, I turned and looked up at the sun shining directly onto the front of the house. Not good. I pulled on a pair of gloves and crouched down beside the box. The top flaps had been folded inside, meaning the hedgehog had no protection from the sun or predators. My breath caught. There was a trail of blood across the base of the box and the hedgehog was on its side. I sank back onto the path, tears welling in my eyes. I didn’t need to lift the
poor thing out of the box to know it had already gone.
‘What happened to you, little one? I asked, gently picking it up and turning it over to reveal several large puncture wounds and a lot of blood. Dog attack. I glanced up at the cottage. Taped inside the window was a yellow warning sign with a photo of a large dog breed and the words ‘BEWARE! I LIVE HERE’ against it. Why couldn’t the woman have been honest? Even if she didn’t want to admit that her dog had attacked the hedgehog – a female – I’d specifically asked her if there’d been blood and she’d said no. I could have phoned Josh and seen if one of his team could collect the hog if I’d had any inkling she was in such a state.
‘I’m so sorry,’ I whispered. I ran my finger along her belly and my breath caught. She was pregnant! I stared at her swollen stomach, my own churning. Surely there was no way any of the babies could still be alive… but I had to be absolutely certain. I sped back to Hedgehog Hollow.
My hands were shaking as I picked up the scalpel back home in the barn. I dropped it back into the tray and took several deep calming breaths until they steadied. I picked up the scalpel again and bit my lip. It’s medically impossible for them to have survived. Leave it! Don’t torture yourself with how many more precious creatures died today. But a tiny miniscule hope for a miracle drove me on and I made my incision.
The Fimberley hedgehog had been expecting a litter of five. All gone. I slumped back in my chair, fighting back the tears. I was too late. I’d failed this beautiful creature and her five babies and I’d failed the Micklebys. Thomas and Gwendoline would have been on hand to respond to an emergency callout instead of making a day job their priority and squeezing in their responsibilities to the hogs round that. I thought about Katniss yesterday. She’d been dropped off goodness knows when during the day and she could have come to further harm left there all alone in a cardboard box. Flies could have got inside the box and infected her wound or curious wildlife could have got to her. Misty-Blue could even have been a threat. I held my head in my hands. This wasn’t going to work. Even with a relatively small number of patients, running the rescue centre was a full-time job. What had I been thinking?
I swallowed down the lump in my throat as I opened out a puppy pad and gently placed the mum on one half with her five babies nestled round her. I folded the other half over the top. ‘Rest in peace, little ones.’
Peeling off my gloves, I washed my hands. I needed to focus on something positive. Gollum. I’d remove some more mange and give him a baby oil massage.
Half an hour later, free of more dead skin, Gollum curled up on a towel as I massaged baby oil into his back. He had very few spines left and I suspected he’d be completely bald within the next couple of days. I turned him over. He definitely loved lying on his back and having his tummy tickled and I liked to think he was smiling or even giggling as he spread his paws wide for me to get more coverage.
The massage would have done him the world of good and it had certainly eased the tension from me. I hadn’t been able to help the Fimberley family but I was definitely helping Gollum.
With Gollum back in his crate and the table wiped down, I opened the door to Ripley’s quarters. I gently moved the shredded paper and fleece aside.
‘Are you hiding right at the back?’ I wrapped my gloved hands round her, lifted her out and placed her on the scales.
She didn’t move.
‘Ripley?’ My stomach tightened. ‘No, Ripley. You can’t be.’
I grabbed her and lay her on her back on a fleecy blanket, massaging her heart. ‘Please, Ripley,’ I pleaded, tears splashing onto the fleece. ‘Please come back.’
But it was too late. There was no saving Ripley either. I gave her belly one final stroke before lying her next to the Fimberley family. I covered her with a piece of grey fleece then sank onto the chair, anguished sobs racking my body.
12
Josh
Lewis’s words were still preying on my mind as I locked up the practice on Friday evening. Let it go? If only. Every other aspect of my life was going so well. The practice was going from strength to strength now that we had a full quota of vets, Hedgehog Hollow was officially my home, and Sam had shown me how amazing being in a proper, genuine, monogamous relationship could be. I should be on cloud nine yet one memory of that fateful day was always there at the back of my mind, haunting me. If Lewis knew the whole truth, he’d know why I couldn’t let go.
As I got into my jeep, I had an urge to see Mum. I’d phoned her with the news that I was moving into Hedgehog Hollow and she’d sounded genuinely delighted, but I was conscious that I’d normally have told her something big like that face to face. Uncomfortable as it would be, she had a right to know that Beth had turned up at the farm just in case she decided to seek out Mum. I’d like to think she’d draw the line there but I wouldn’t put it past Beth. The woman had no morals.
I fired off a quick text to Sam to say I was going home via Mum’s and would be a bit late, then set off towards Little Tilbury.
Ten minutes later, I pulled up against the churchyard wall opposite Primrose Cottage. Mum’s new home was a pretty two-bedroom stone cottage painted in a light yellowy-cream with a pale green door, window frames and matching shutters. It was such a contrast to the airy, modern family home I’d grown up in yet it couldn’t have been more perfect for her. She seemed so relaxed and content since she’d moved. Village life definitely agreed with her. Or perhaps it was being away from a house full of memories of her life with him that agreed with her.
Just about the only thing my father hadn’t screwed up was the divorce. He didn’t contest it and he let Mum have the house which, as far as I was concerned, was the only decent thing to do.
‘This is an unexpected surprise,’ Mum said, crossing the cobbled lane and giving me a warm hug. ‘I’d just got up to make a cup of tea when I spotted you pulling up so your timing’s perfect.’
She sent me into the lounge while she went to make drinks. I sat in a high-backed armchair, placed my phone on the arm rest and gazed round the room. The furniture and décor, like the cottage, were such a contrast to our family home but everything about Mum had changed since the incident. She’d packed in her job as a clothes shop manager to retrain as a counsellor. She’d had her long, blonde hair cut into a highlighted bob, started wearing contacts instead of glasses and even dressed differently. Weirdly, despite changing everything, she seemed more like my mum than ever before.
‘Here you go.’ She handed me a mug of tea. ‘Let’s pretend it’s something stronger to toast your good news. Happy new home!’
I smiled at her and clinked my mug against hers. ‘Thank you. I should probably have told you in person.’
She sat down on the sofa and shook her head. ‘The phone was absolutely fine so don’t you fret about that. I’m so thrilled for you both. Samantha’s lovely.’
We chatted about me giving notice on Wisteria Cottage and my plans to move everything across tomorrow with Dave’s help.
‘Are you going to move your stuff out of Alder Lea too?’ she asked.
I sighed. I knew I might as well be honest about that. ‘Dave offered but I’m not sure. I haven’t been inside Alder Lea for quite a while.’
She narrowed her eyes at me. ‘Define “quite a while”.’
‘Erm… since I first moved out.’
She pressed her fingers against her lips. ‘Oh, Josh! Why ever not?’
‘For the same reason I moved out in the first place. Because it reminds me of them and what they did.’ I kept imagining them together in my house. Had they shagged on my bed? The sofa? Anger coursed through my veins every time I was in Alder Lea. I took out a year’s rental contract on the first property I found – a pokey flat above a village shop. It was cold and dated but it was quiet, close to work, and held no painful memories. I was a little less impulsive about my next move – Wisteria Cottage – making sure I found somewhere decent that felt a lot more like home.
‘But that was eighteen mont
hs ago,’ Mum said, frowning. ‘You really haven’t been inside for that long? It must be filthy for a start.’
‘Our cleaner goes in every fortnight to stop the dust and cobwebs building up.’
‘That’s good. But you haven’t been inside yourself?’
‘I can’t seem to do it. It’s not just about them being there together. It’s about everything else.’
She studied my face for a moment then nodded. ‘I’m so sorry. I never meant—’
‘No, Mum. He’s the one who should be sorry. He caused all this. And her.’
‘Even so…’
‘Lewis thinks I’m being stupid and should just let it go but he doesn’t know what really happened. I don’t think…’ I tailed off as a text from Sam flashed up on my phone:
✉︎ From Sam
Can you come home asap? I need you xx
I jumped to my feet, heart thumping, and rang Sam’s mobile but there was no answer. Mum watched me, her forehead creased with concern.
‘It’s Sam,’ I said as I disconnected the call. ‘I’ve got to go.’ I quickly tapped in a response.
✉︎ To Sam
On my way xx
Mum stood up. ‘Is she okay?’
‘I’m not sure. I’m hoping it isn’t the Grimes boys again.’
‘Can you text me when you get home to let me know she’s okay? Or I’m going to worry.’
‘I will. Hopefully it’s nothing.’ But Sam never sent cryptic messages like that. That was more her cousin Chloe’s style. Something bad must have happened.
There were no lights on in the barn or the farmhouse when I arrived home but Sam’s car was in the farmyard. The darkness unnerved me.
‘I’m home,’ I called, unlocking the farmhouse door and switching on the hallway light.
New Arrivals at Hedgehog Hollow Page 7