“I didn’t think it was,” she said, but it wasn’t very convincing. In fact, I had the idea that maybe it was exactly what she’d been thinking. And we’d had such a good night. Now, the mood was ruined, I was pissed off, and Kina looked like she might think I wasn’t the best person to be with after all.
“Look,” she said. “I have to get home to my laptop so we can handle this. I’ll come up with some kind of strategy for us over the weekend. Come to my office first thing on Monday morning so we can see what we can do.”
She got up and left the room, searching for her clothes. When she came back, she had her clothes in her arms. I watched her drop the robe, standing naked in front of me with no sense of self-consciousness, and put on her underwear.
I got up, trying not to stare at her too much and found boxers in my underwear drawer. When she was dressed, clothes in place again like we hadn’t done anything, I followed her to the front door and let her out.
“I’ll see you on Monday,” she said before turning around and walking away into the night.
Chapter 16 – Kina
I sat with my hands in my hair, elbows on my desk, staring at Jacob’s file in front of me. His history was bad. Assault, a fight on the field that got way out of hand, and aggressive reactions when he was questioned about it in the media.
Aggression, volatile behavior, unpredictability: These were all things that made the story that much worse. If celebrities took whatever happened in their stride, the stories died out so much quicker.
Jacob, however, had built up a name for himself, but it wasn’t a good one. Not yet. He liked to pile on one misstep after another. Until now, when fate had pushed us back together. I just had to figure out a way to change how he was viewed by other people. Or, maybe, the things he did to be viewed that way.
I closed my eyes and leaned back in my chair. God, why did Friday have to start so well and end so badly? Our sex had been hot. It had been more than hot. I couldn’t remember when I’d last slept with someone who I’d had that much of a connection with in bed and who happened to be a decent guy to me afterward.
It was a pity that the night had been ruined with so much drama.
And now, Jacob and I were a little sticky. Sure, I’d been unfair toward him, bringing up his past like it was all his fault. It was sort of his fault, of course. No one had held a gun to his head and told him to publicly assault someone, but it wasn’t fair he was the only one being dragged down for this.
Whatever was up with the Markus character, he was set on making more trouble for Jacob, and he knew exactly where to start. Which was a problem. If he knew how to get Jacob off the team, it would be the end of Jacob’s career, and that wasn’t an option.
I had to do everything I could to make it work for him. It was my job as his PR manager to make it happen for him, but losing his career would hurt him. I knew what that would be like on a personal level
Kyle had missed his big break and look where he was at, perpetually drunk and in trouble. I was the one who had to pick up the pieces, so I got a firsthand account.
No, I didn’t wish that on anyone. Or their siblings.
I leaned forward again and found a blank piece of paper. I started jotting down ideas how to get his image back up there again. We had to start with the scandals that were doing the rounds now, and then, we had to build Jacob up to a point where he was beloved again. He had been once upon a time, and I wanted to restore that for him.
I tapped my pencil on the table, thinking. What was happening that they were all so against Jacob? Surely, if he trained with them almost every day, they would know he didn’t seem like the kind of person who would be intentionally aggressive all the time?
Unless he was, and I didn’t see that side of him. In which case, it would be better to get another perspective. And starting with the source was the best idea.
Having nothing else to follow, I decided to go with my intuition. It had never let me down before. I picked up my cell phone and dialed a phone number, not letting myself think too much about it, for fear I would back out at the last second.
Chapter 17 – Kina
Markus Spears answered his phone on the third ring, and he sounded out of breath.
“Yeah?” he asked.
“Mr. Spears, you’re speaking to Kina Peterson. I’m phoning on behalf of Jacob Lawson.”
“Who are you?” he asked. “A reporter?”
“No, I’m the PR Manager working with him.”
“Right,” he said, and he didn’t sound happy at all.
I hoped that it was enough for him to talk to me about everything.
“Would you mind if I spoke to you about the messages that have been circulating recently? I understand that he’s slighted you in some way.”
“You’re damn right he did,” Markus said. “Don’t know if you follow the news, miss, but he’s a loose cannon.”
“Why don’t you tell me what happened?”
He snorted. “You don’t need much of anything to happen for him to lose his mind, if that’s what you’re asking.”
I rolled my eyes. He was dramatic, trying to drag it out. I just wanted facts, not an emotional rollercoaster.
“What happened?” I asked again. “I can’t seem to find anything specific in the media.”
The messages were all about how Markus was the victim, but there were no real events that I could find.
“I was out with my friends, minding my own business, when he attacked me. He’s mad, I tell you.”
“Why would he just attack you?” I asked.
“Beats me. I said something about Texas, and it must have struck a nerve. It was ugly.”
I took a deep breath and blew it out slowly.
“When did this happen?”
“Friday night. He’ll never do it at training when everyone’s around to suspend him and put him down on his ass where he belongs.”
I nodded. I had everything I needed to know. “Thank you, Mr. Spears. I appreciate your input.”
He said something I couldn’t make out before he hung up.
He’d told me as much as I needed to know. Markus Spears was lying through his ass, and he was trying to bring Jacob down. I had no idea what his problem was, but I knew he was lying. If his story had been on any other day, I might have believed enough to follow up with witnesses, but it wasn’t necessary. Markus Spears was lying.
I knew he was lying because the alleged fight happened while Jacob and I were having sex.
Jacob arrived just after nine. He was freshly showered. I could smell his soap and aftershave. He was dressed in sports clothes, ready to go to his training session after he came to me. He didn’t look very happy, though. He seemed a little down, and it was understandable.
“Hello, Jacob,” I said. It was all very formal. I would have liked to give him a hug, but we were in public and our working relationship wasn’t supposed to allow for that kind of intimacy, never mind everything else we’d been doing.
“How are you?” I asked.
He shrugged. “Tired of all this gossip when all I want to do is play ball. This isn’t even sports anymore, it’s about entertainment. People are bored out of their minds, and they’re amused by someone else’s suffering.”
I nodded. He wasn’t wrong. He sounded a little bitter, and I could see how this would get him down. I was embarrassed because of how Kyle was being, and I wasn’t even famous.
“Well,” I said. “I think you can deal with the good news first, then.”
Jacob looked at me with hopeful eyes.
“I verified what Markus is talking about, and it’s bullshit.”
Jacob looked relieved. “How did you find out?” he asked.
“I phoned him.”
He frowned. “And he told you it was bullshit?”
I chuckled. “Oh, no. He told me everything that happened. How you were out in public with him and attacked him for saying something about Texas. On Friday night.”
Jacob s
hook his head. “I was with you on Friday night.”
“My point exactly.”
He smiled. “Right.” He took a deep breath, and it seemed like it was a weight off his shoulders. His smile faded a little. “So, what do we do, now?”
“Well, that’s where I’m stuck,” I said. “Coming clean about where you were is ideally what you would want to do. A witness will do wonders for your career.”
“But we were—”
“Yeah, I know.” I watched him, my face carefully expressionless. “That might not look very good when it gets out.”
“It’s not good that we’re doing it?”
I shook my head. “It’s okay, I guess, but I’m your PR Manager. It can be misconstrued as a business move on your end, something to bribe me with.”
Jacob nodded, slowly. “I get it. God, people are inclined to think the worst, aren’t they?”
“Unfortunately,” I said.
“What if I just lie about it and throw it back on him? I’m sure I can come up with something that will make him look bad, instead. People will believe anything.”
“They will. And they love drama and gossip, and it will be like reality television. You don’t want to go there, trust me. The moment you call him out and say something that’s a lie, too, he’s going to retaliate. You’re going to get stuck in a circle of revenge and he-said-she-said, and you don’t want that.”
“But it’s my image.”
I shook my head. “It’s not. If you do that, it’s about his image you’ll be playing at, and that’s just bad sportsmanship. Be the bigger man.”
Jacob sighed loudly. “Being the bigger man doesn’t exactly fix things.”
“Not right away, no,” I said. I understood where he was coming from. “But in the long run, they’ll like you better for it, and you’ll look better as a player who should be kept on in the end.”
Jacob didn’t look happy. I knew he wanted revenge. He wanted to do to Markus what he’d done to him so it was fair. No one liked it when their name was being dragged through the mud. It was so easy to respond, to do the same.
“Markus wants you to retaliate. If he can get you to respond, great. If he can get you to fight with him, even better. He wants you to freak out and respond with exactly what he’s accusing you of. If you do that, all you’ll do is prove his lies right.”
Jacob groaned. “Why is this so complicated? What the hell did I do to deserve this?”
“I know it sucks,” I said. “But we’re working on this. We’ll make it happen.”
Jacob sighed again. He looked around the office, toward the window, at my table. I could almost see his mind working.
“I think if I keep quiet, though, I will be made a fool, and I can’t defend myself. That’s not fair either. Or what if I tell the world about you? Something has to work.”
I blinked at him.
“I really don’t think it’s a good idea,” I said.
“Come on, Kina. It will be better than just sitting here.”
I took a deep breath and held it for three counts before blowing it out again. I was getting irritated. Jacob had been redeemed in my eyes by Markus’s lie, but he was starting to grate me again.
“Look, in the end, it’s your choice. You decide what you want to do and let me know.”
Jacob frowned. “You’re going to leave this up to me?”
“I’m here to give you advice and nothing more,” I said coldly. “It’s your choice how you want to handle your career.” I wanted to be sarcastic about how good a job he did before, but I wasn’t going to be that cruel. It was clear that his history was a touchy topic. Markus wouldn’t have used it if it wasn’t. I wasn’t going to be that person.
He was getting irritated, too. I couldn’t tell why.
“Fine,” he said and his voice was snappy. “I’ll do that.”
He got up.
“You have to tell me by Friday what you decided. If you don’t, your career will be open. You don’t have forever to think about this.”
Jacob nodded and left without saying anything else. We were back to being sticky. For a moment there, it had seemed like we were okay again, like we were agreeing. I liked Jacob, and I liked it when we got along. I didn’t like when we got stuck, and that seemed to happen quite often. Jacob was a stubborn man. If he wasn’t going to listen to me about what to do, he had to make his own choices. I was his PR manager, but I wasn’t going to tell him what to do. I wasn’t his mother.
I sighed. Deciding that didn’t make me feel any better about it all. I wished he would come back, and we could fix us. But there wasn’t an us to fix. And even if there was, he didn’t seem like the type to come back and grovel.
Chapter 18 – Jacob
I didn’t know what to do. My image was tanking. It was sinking further and further, even when I was trying to make it better. I wasn’t even doing anything to make it worse, now. Not if you didn’t count Kina. I didn’t think of her as a mistake because no one knew what we were doing, and someone that good in bed couldn’t be a mistake.
I had until Friday to decide what to do with my image. It wasn’t a lot of time. My days suddenly felt very short.
If I was going to come clean about what I really did when Markus had started the rumors, it would make me look bad. Replacing violence with sex didn’t seem like it was much better than what I had right now, and I was worried that pulling Kina into the mix would ruin her credibility. She had a career she was building, too. What would it look like to her next clients if it came out that she slept with her current client?
I didn’t want to throw her under the bus to save my own skin. I knew I could be a real dick, and my temper was a problem. I was aware of that. But I could put myself into her shoes, and I didn’t want to be the one to ruin her reputation for the sake of my own.
Training on Tuesday was a good outlet. Coach started by dividing us up into smaller groups to train together for the day, which meant I didn’t have anything to do with Markus. I was relieved. I felt like giving him a piece of my mind. Or my fist. If he came up to me, I might have followed through.
Luckily for him, he didn’t come up to me. Lucky for both of us.
I pushed hard during training, trying to get rid of all the anger and tension that was pent up inside me. The last thing I needed was to lash out unnecessarily because I was already angry and resentful. I didn’t need more bad publicity where violence was concerned.
I hoped that my subconscious would work for me while I was training and that by the time I was done, I would have an idea of what to do. That wasn’t the case.
When we finally walked off the field, my muscles screamed. I was drenched in sweat, and I still had no idea what to do.
“Hey,” I said to Hanson when we walked into the locker room. “Do you want to go out for a drink tonight?”
Hanson nodded. “I’ll just check with Lacey, but if she doesn’t need me around the house, sure.”
We got dressed and Hanson called Lacey. When he hung up, he nodded at me. “Sure,” he said. “A drink or two sounds like a good plan.”
“Thanks, man,” I said.
We went to the Batting Cage. It was a nice place to hang out, a place I had a feeling was Hanson and Brian’s regular spot. And it also brought back good memories for me, of better times—when I could fuck Kina in the bathroom without the whole world finding out about it and throwing a fit.
We got a table in the middle of the floor and ordered a light beer, each. During training, it was never a good idea to drink a lot, but I needed the alcohol to take the edge off.
“What’s bothering you?” Hanson asked.
“What if I just wanted to hang out?” he asked.
Hanson chuckled. “You know I’m down for that,” he said. “You’re a cool guy, but I know something’s eating at you. You’ve been keeping to yourself enough for this to be a little out of the ordinary.”
I nodded, looking at my beer. I was transparent. Great.
“Did you see the shit Markus posted on Friday?” I asked.
Hanson nodded and sipped on his own beer. “I saw them. It’s a load of shit, if you ask me.”
“Yeah, it is. I wasn’t even with him. I was with Kina.”
Hanson looked sharply at me when I said it.
“Something tells me you weren’t seeing her on a Friday night for work on your image.”
I shrugged, unable to hide a smile. “It depends on how you want to define work.”
Hanson laughed. “Well, well, well. You too have been at it for a while and still seem to be together. Impressive. It seems that PR managers are just so damn attractive, doesn’t it?”
That’s right, I remembered. Lacey, Hanson’s wife, was his PR manager, too.
“So, the problem is exactly that. I fucked Kina, but I can’t exactly use that as an alibi without coming out with it.”
Hanson nodded slowly. “I hear what you’re saying. Unless you announce the relationship with her, and it’s out in the open. It’s what I did with Lacey, in the end.”
I shook my head. “No, no. God, no. We’re not dating. It’s just sex, bro. God, I can’t do that right now.”
Hanson chuckled. “That was a strong response. You not into her like that?”
I shook my head. “I guess I could be. But after Marisa … It was because of my ex that all the trouble with the assault and then the transfer started. I don’t think I have what it takes to do that whole spiel again.”
“Sorry, man,” Hanson said. “Football and women just always seem to be a flammable combo.”
“Yeah,” I said and sighed.
The truth was, I was into Kina “like that.” Even more than I had been with Marisa. But I felt like a fool, giving up my heart after everything I went through last time. I didn’t have the guts to admit to Hanson yet, let alone Kina. I was just starting to admit to myself.
Chapter 19 – Jacob
“You can’t tell them that you just fucked Kina because it would look bad, right?” Hanson asked, stressing the dilemma I was facing.
Hold Onto Me_A Secret Baby Romance Page 114