by Alice Moore
“Can you tell me the story? It was bad…” Rough and slurring slightly, James’ request sent my heart pitter-pattering and a fierce heat to engulf every cell in my body. Words couldn’t describe how happy I was that he relied on me, how comfortable he felt to call me when he wasn’t doing well.
“Yeah- yeah, I can. Give me a second.” Setting my phone on my pillow, I sluggishly pushed myself up to sit and run my hand through my hair. Throwing my legs over the side of my bed, I grabbed my crutch before hauling myself onto my feet. My brace made a clunking sound against the hardwood floor, but I ignored it to take hold of my phone. “I’m just going to get some water first.”
Hobbling my way to the bathroom across the hall, I winced at the bright lights that skewered my brain. Setting my phone on the back of the toilet, my fingers worked the faucet knobs shakily as they tried to overcome my half-asleep state. For a moment, my mind went back to the first time James had called me in the middle of the night. It’d happened three days after I got home, and he’d asked about my ankle.
Splashing water on my face, I cupped my hands together to drink and soothe my dry mouth with quirked lips. It didn’t take me long to figure out why he really called that first time, and since then he’d taken my ‘call me any time’ advice very seriously. Turning off the faucet, I looked at myself in the mirror as I dried my face before snatching my phone.
“James? You there?” Making my way back into my bedroom, I shut the door behind me as Kiki watched me from her place at the foot of my bed. James’ only response was a grunt, and I sat down on top of my blankets before clearing my throat. “Once upon a time, in a magical land, there lived a peasant boy named Jack. Jack lived on a farm with his mom in the middle of vast countryside. There was an ocean of green in all directions, but Jack didn’t like his farm boy life…”
I’d recited this story so many times I didn’t even have to think about it anymore, and my speaker emanated no noise at all. Closing my eyes, I leaned back on my butt as I spoke the same words I’d spoke last night, and the night before. Sleep was so tantalizingly close, but at the same time I couldn’t reach it.
I didn’t want to reach it.
“… Jack’s mother told him, ‘You take the cow to market, Jack. Don’t lose the cow with your silly daydreams!’, for she knew how much Jack’s mind tended to wander. He promised to do her proud, but she still shook her head. ‘And make sure you get a good price, or we’ll starve to death! You hear me, boy?’, she said, and Jack nodded furiously before slipping out the front door…”
“Why is this your favorite story, Caroline?” Cutting me off, James’ question caused my eyelids to pop open. Goosebumps rushed down my arms, and I switched my phone from one ear to the other before answering him.
“Because Jack was a nobody, and he did great things. It reminds me that the most ordinary people can be the most amazing. What’s your favorite story? Did anyone tell you stories when you were little?” Even as I launched my probe, I knew the answer; James’ parents didn’t do that kind of thing with their children. He’d let slip that most of the time his parents were too busy fawning over his brothers… unless he messed up, of course.
“Mine… I think… it’d be Hansel and Gretel. You know, the one about the kids and the candy house and the witch.” Humming in acknowledgement, I took a deep breath as James continued speaking. “My buddy- the one that died in the Humvee… he used to tell that story to his kids over video chat. I guess I like it because they escaped without help. They did what they had to do, you know?”
“Yeah. Do you want me to tell that story instead?”
“Can you?” Nodding even though he couldn’t see me, I closed my eyes again to think of what to say. Hansel and Gretel was a pretty dark story, and I wanted to keep it light. James didn’t call me to listen about a witch that tricked children and baked them into pies that she then ate.
Of course, that was a big part of the story, but dulling it was important.
“Okay. Once upon a time, there were two children- Hansel and Gretel. They were siblings- twins- and they were constantly getting into mischief. Hansel liked to put pine needles in their evil uncle’s soup that they weren’t allowed to eat. Gretel liked to put mud in his slippers. Every time they pranked their uncle, Hansel and Gretel were sent out of their little cabin as punishment, but they enjoyed the freedom…”
Droning on and on, I ducked my head and ran my hand through my hair a hundred times as the darkest part of the night waned into early morning. It wasn’t until I heard James’ light snore through the line that I paused, and for a moment I just listened to him breathe. We were hours apart, but I’d never felt closer to him. He was lost, and each time he called me he found his way. Even if he wandered just an hour, it was still progress.
Staring at my phone as it fell into my lap, I expelled a tired sigh. Four, long, weeks had passed, and I was starting to feel the toll. My camera was basically collecting dust, and I couldn’t even play with Kiki until my ankle had fully healed. Leaning to stare at my booted foot, I frowned slightly as my mind went back to my first doctor’s appointment. The man that x-rayed and checked my foot had been surprised at how well it’d been set. Telling him the story of James sticking his fingers into my leg to find the break had made him cringe outwardly.
“Did you get another call, Caroline?” Glancing up at Sheila’s question, I nodded before she slipped through the threshold. I hadn’t even noticed her opening my door despite the low groan the hinges let out. She’d moved back into our guest bedroom, but neither my father nor I objected any.
She was a much better cook than I, especially because I couldn’t reach the spice cabinet.
“I feel so bad for leaving him, Sheila. Every night- and I can’t help him the way I should.” Seating herself next to me, Sheila wrapped her arm around my back to rub soothingly. She was who people pictured when hearing the term ‘Southern Hospitality’, with her strong physique and dark complexion that never discolored from anger. Leaning on her shoulder, I sniffled lightly as I remembered all of the strange looks I got when she picked me up from school for the first time. So many kids wondered how an African American could have a white child, and it was confusing for young me.
Even though I knew she’d never marry my dad, I considered Sheila my mother figure. She couldn’t have children of her own, so I’d made it my mission my entire life to give her everything she wanted.
“But you are helping him, CareBear. You can only do what you have the means to. I’d hazard a guess that this is easier for him, you know.” Tilting my head to look into Sheila’s wise, dark eyes, my question must’ve splattered across my face as she nodded sagely. “Oh, yes. Men- they grow up thinking that sharing their feelings isn’t manly. That it’s wrong. That they have to be strong and silent. So, I bet not seeing your face gives him a sense of security. Why don’t you invite him over? Even Kiki has been down in the dumps since you got back.”
“You think he’d come?” Patting my back reassuringly, Sheila winked down at me before standing up. Her pajamas rustled in the ensuing silence, and I watched her wander towards my desk to tap my camera bag.
“I think you should ask him. You know him better than I do, Caroline. Just remember- there’s no such thing as a bad decision.”
James
Clearing my throat roughly, I rolled my shoulders to get rid of some of the tension that rested just under my skin. Nerves tightened my abdomen, stiffening my arm when I raised my fist to knock on the door.
Caroline’s home was part of a cookie cutter collection that spanned the entire neighborhood. Wrapped in light beige siding, with a two-step, tiny concrete block to stand in front of the door under a curved, white awning. The front yard was covered in green grass, but there were no flowers anywhere.
My heart thudded hard in my chest as I waited for someone to answer my knock, and I swiped my palm across my jaw. I couldn’t remember a time when I was so nervous to meet a woman. Then again, most women don’t do what she
did.
Glancing back at my car, I pursed my lips together at the sleek, black paint job and shiny rims. I had stuck the thing in storage and bought a truck, but the strange notion to impress Caroline urged me to wipe off the dust. A soft click stole my attention, and I whipped my head around just as the barrier swung open.
Caroline stood in the threshold awkward, and I narrowed my eyes on the crutch that supported half her body. Her injured foot was encased in a thin boot, and the other was resting in a purple flip flop. Traveling up to her face, my eyes strained to take in every detail I could.
I’d missed her- a lot.
“Hey, James- um… come in.” Wobbling out of the way, Caroline’s face flushed pink, and the sight brought a smile to mine. “How was the drive? I know it’s long- I’m sorry.”
“It was fine, thanks. I’m actually glad to be back in the city.” Lies. Clenching my jaw, I shut the door behind me before turning to face Caroline fully. “I was surprised when you asked me to come by. Is everything okay?”
Alarm flittered across her expression, and she turned a darker shade of pink before nodding. The floor creaked when she shifted against her crutch, and I held my breath in anticipation.
“Oh yeah- everything is fine… I just- I wanted to see you.” My eyes widened at that, shock taking over my expression as my chest tightened. Staring down at her feet, Caroline huffed what might’ve been a laugh that rose above the blood that pounded in my ears. “It seems stupid now that I say it out loud… but- yeah, so…”
“It’s not stupid. I was glad you asked. Where’s your dad? And Sheila?” Tearing my gaze from Caroline, I glanced around her living room almost anxiously. I felt like a teenager again, meeting a girl in her house for the first time without her parents home. It was as shitty a feeling as it was exciting, and she hobbled towards the plain, brown sectional sofa to drop down heavily.
“My dad had a VA appointment, and Sheila went with him. It’s weird. They don’t love each other like that, but she’s basically his wife. I’m lucky.” Sitting next to her, I grunted absently at that knowledge as I looked over the assortment of odds and ends on the entertainment system. “What about you, though. James, you didn’t call me last night- I got worried.”
Taking a deep breath, I licked my lips in preparation to utter the words I’d never thought I’d say. Cracking a smile, I glanced over at Caroline’s worried expression, her brows drawn and eyes shining. My chest buzzed, and I clasped my hands together to rub away the tingling sensation that shot through me.
“Actually… I- I slept really well last night. I didn’t have a nightmare…” I dreamt about you instead. I could almost hear that last phrase hang between us, and Caroline grinned widely. Pride and accomplishment overtook her face, and she reached to grab my hands in both of hers to squeeze. Electricity shot up my arms to jolt my heart, and she’d barely opened her mouth before my body moved without my mind’s control.
Caroline’s lips were soft and tasted a hint of mozzarella cheese, and I kissed her hard before realizing what I was doing. Any attempt I could make to pull away was halted when she flung her arms around my neck, and her acceptance set fire to my blood. Capturing her mouth with a ferocity I didn’t know I possessed, I leaned back to pull her into my lap.
Straddling my waist, Caroline rubbed her generous bust against my chest with a needy whimper. My mind washed in white, and I worked my tongue into her mouth to groan at her taste. Wrapping my hands around her waist, I held her tight and close as desperation surged through me.
“Don’t scare me- oh God… you scared me so bad. I- I thought something bad happened to you- that you did something bad to yourself…” Mumbling into my mouth, Caroline took a deep, shuddering breath that seemed to suck part of my soul from me. “I need you to call me, James. Okay? You have to call me.”
A small, hot tear fell from Caroline’s thick eyelashes to land on my cheek, and I slid my hands up her body and into her hair. Resting my forehead against hers, I took a shaky breath of my own before answering.
“I’m sorry. I should’ve called this morning.” Relaxing heavily into the couch with Caroline’s weight comfortably holding me down, I kneaded her scalp absently as she sunk into my chest. “I missed you.”
“Asshole-“ Cracking and high pitched, Caroline’s rasp made me wince even as I closed my eyes. “I’m… I’ve been miserable. My dad and Sheila teamed up on me, and I can’t go out to photograph anything until my ankle checks out. I should’ve stayed with you. This city is terrible.”
“Do you want to sneak out with me?” Affection blossomed in my chest when Caroline nodded instantly, and she sat up a little to wipe her moist eyes.
“I was hoping you’d ask. Can Kiki come, too? She needs someone to play with her.” Smiling as Caroline clumsily climbed off me, I nodded even while she looked anywhere but at me. Watching her grab her crutch, I waited until she was plenty far away to stand up. My lips tingled, aching to touch hers; after the dozens of hours on the phone, I just wanted her close.
“Um… where are we going? Do you have any place in mind or was that offer spur of the moment?” Caroline’s blush reached its peak, and I shrugged absently as I tried to focus on what she meant, not what she meant. Wobbling around the couch, she headed for the other side of the living room where a sliding, glass door sat unnoticed.
“Actually, I was hoping you’d have somewhere. I don’t really know this city too well. I’d only lived here for six or seven months before getting that cabin.” The door slid open, and I stuffed my hands in my jean pockets as Kiki came bouncing through. She trotted right over to me, tail stiff and nostrils flaring as she sniffed and circled me. Letting her do her thing, I cast my gaze at Caroline while she wandered back over to me.
“I mean… we can always go to the park?” Any idea was a good idea at this point, and I fished my keys out of my pocket quietly. Eyeing Kiki wearily, I reached to scratch between her ears with a slight smirk. Her pleased groan echoed around the room, and when I glanced up Caroline wore a warm smile.
“Let’s go, then. I’ll even take you to lunch- somewhere with plates.” My lame attempt at a joke earned me a laugh, and Caroline shook her head as we shuffled towards the door.
“Such a gentleman. Upgrading from bags to styrofoam take out boxes. What did I do to deserve such luxury, James?” Pulling open the door, I grinned at the question before wrapping my free arm around Caroline’s waist. Instantly her cheeks reddened, and I couldn’t help but chuckle at how embarrassed she looked.
“It’s the least I can do after keeping you up all night, every night, Caroline.” Her jaw dropped, eyes widening, and my grin threatened to break my cheeks. Pushing herself away roughly, she huffed as she tried, and failed, to storm off with her crutch down the short stairs. I’d missed our banter, no matter that it’d taken a sharp sexual turn, and I shook my head before closing the door behind me as she muttered to herself just loud enough for me to hear.
“Idiot…”
Caroline
“You’re seriously going to eat two chili dogs and fried broccoli?” Popping open my cardboard box of greasy, yummy goodness, I eyeballed James’ container wearily. “I don’t think that’s healthy.”
“Why don’t you focus on eating that burger, Caroline. Don’t bitch about portion to me when you have a cheeseburger with a bigger circumference than your entire head.” Gasping at the tease, I turned my gaze to my burger to take in all of its unhealthy glory. James had a point; this thing was massive. If I were any less active, I’d gain five pounds just by looking at it.
“Remind me why I put up with your crap…” Taking off the top bun as I grumbled, I snatched up my ketchup packets with a smirk plastered on my face. Tearing them open, I slathered the contents on top of my bacon, pepper, fried cheese loaded burger with a twisting stomach.
“I paid…” Bland and flat, James’ answer pulled a giggle from me as I tossed my empty ketchup packets into the top box. Sitting under a tree, we were shielded by the sun,
but it didn’t do anything to staunch the humid heat. Sweat collected between my shoulder blades and breasts, but I wasn’t complaining.
Being outside would always beat being inside, no matter the weather.
“So, if you haven’t been able to go out with your camera, how have you been working?” James posed the question as I took a big bite of my burger, and I used my chewing time to think of an answer. The truth was I just reached into my backlog of photos; even then, I didn’t really need to do anything. My father handled the bills, so I didn’t really have any financial responsibilities.
Groaning softly at how good my cheeseburger was, I closed my eyes to savor it for just a second. Gino’s was famous all along the coast, and this was the exact reason why. They weren’t cheap, per say, but everything they made were delicious.
“Well…” Grabbing a napkin to dab away the juice that dribbled down my chin, I swallowed harshly before continuing. Across the table James looked as interested as he could while shoving the end of his chili dog into his mouth. “My dad doesn’t let me pay bills. He says I’m his kid, I live under his roof, so he’s going to treat me like a kid. Which is fine- I’m not complaining. It’s not like he’s strapped for cash, and if he was, he’d tell me and let me help. So, I’m not broke by any means. If I get bored or start to go crazy from being in the house, I just go through my backlog as if I’m picking something for the Journal. My bosses know what happened, and they’re really good about it.”
“I see- okay. Even though I’m not with Nick’s company anymore, I still get paid like I am. It’s kind of shitty because I just left with no warning, and he still takes care of me… not that I don’t have enough money to live off of for the rest of my life, but…” Ducking my head in a nod, I adjusted my grip on my burger to take another bite. “When you asked me here, I thought about going to see him and Ethan. It’s a long, fucked up story, but I really did him and Hannah wrong.”