“I’ll mitigate that. And when I need help, Max will step in. We’ve decided to…move on together.”
“Meaning?” She cocked a brow.
“Meaning if he’s going to be an uncle, he’s going to have a more prominent role in my life and the baby’s, provided you want to keep it…and me.”
She could do this. She could tell him what she needed, how she needed it, and how she worried. She took a deep breath. She had to tell him. “I need the stage.”
“This is your life.” He met her gaze. “I won’t interfere. I just want to be a part of it.”
“You’ll be on the road a lot.”
“It’s up to you.” He looked away, then back at her. “About the baby. I never thought—”
“Hush.” She pushed two fingers against his lips. “I want to try, Derrick. I want to…” She closed her eyes, searching for the right words. The lyricist in her was usually good at this sort of thing. The problem was, this wasn’t about death and suicide or dark feelings. This truly concerned the living side of life, things she’d never sung or written about. “I want this. I want it all. If you’ll come with me.”
“Of course I’ll come with you. And you’ll be in my bed.” A wicked grin crossed his lips.
“Our bed.” She reached for him, ran a hand through his hair, and pulled him down for a kiss. His lips moved to cover hers, slanting slightly while a hand caressed her belly. He tasted sweet, slightly of tobacco and mint.
She pulled back. “Tea?”
“Yeah. It’s still early. I drove Max back to the airport this morning and came home to be with you.”
An eyebrow rose. “How’d you know I’d be safe?”
“I had help.”
She tilted her head slightly. “No name?”
“The large cat in your dreams? It’s Erick. He’s been taking an interest in the lives of those of us who have been in the shadows for too long. Said it was imperative we know we’re not alone.”
“I wondered about that. He’s apparently making himself well known among my band.”
“Yeah. He said he’d do that, more or less to check on things and make sure the world works the way it is supposed to.”
“How can he do that?”
“Best not to ask.” Derrick shifted his weight beside her. He’d stretched out alongside her, covering her body with just enough weight, as though she were delicate. She’d started to get annoyed, but then she remembered the news he’d given her. Their life now involved a baby. “Will Erick be involved more in our life?”
“I don’t know. No one knows much about him other than the basics. He’s quite prophetic, and while no one understands him, he is an interesting force.”
“Yes.” she nodded. “I wager that he is. The power in my dreams was frightening.”
“That’s Erick’s way. He’s…a mystery.” Derrick chuckled.
“Will he help Max?”
Derrick shook his head. “Therein lies the question, doesn’t it? Max is comfortable in the shadows, content there almost. His life has always been somewhat of a mystery since we both joined the spook brigade, but now that he’s had interesting developments, who knows.”
She reveled in his touch, felt for his aura. Her probe slammed into a brick wall. “What’s this?”
“I learned to shield when it’s appropriate.”
She glared. He couldn’t shut her out, not when he’d just confessed his love for her. And the fact that she carried his child. “Derrick, you’ll let me in?”
He smiled softly, reassurance twinkling in his purple eyes. “After you’ve rested some. Trust me. Have faith, okay?”
Her frown softened.
He bent down to kiss her.
She tasted his tongue, that familiar pleading sensation he brought with his mouth that always stirred her insides and made her wet.
A hand covered her breast. “Not yet. Soon, I promise. You need rest. And we have to think about the baby. I know nothing of raising a child; let alone how to have sex with a pregnant woman.”
She frowned hard.
“My mate shouldn’t frown. It’s not fitting for someone so beautiful.”
She growled at his playful laughter, then settled back into the comfort of his arms.
A few minutes of silence passed and Derrick’s hand in hers continued to calm her. She shifted, noticed his nudity. Her lips went dry. Handsome didn’t begin to describe him. He had a few more scars than the last time she’d seen him naked, but the mental damage she’d sensed in him was gone, or at least blocked from her until she healed some. He’d taken precautions, too, the tea on his breath would calm her down, provided he let her have a cup.
She was going to go insane over being pregnant. So much she could do, so much she’d have to deal with. The record label would have to put the next album on hold. The tabloids would go raucous with the news that this century’s hottest death metal band was having a baby.
A thought occurred to her. “Derrick, are we getting married?”
He shifted again. “The question is, when, baby. Not are we. And… when would you like?”
She closed her eyes to think. She’d never imagined having a wedding before but it would be fitting if they had it late in the year. “The dead of winter?”
“Dead of winter it is.” His smile managed to make her feel even more energetic. She tried to move, her body ached, and she groaned.
“Careful.” He adjusted the covers over her. “You were out for a long while. We made sure, bringing in a doctor Max’s, uh…” He blinked. “…lady friend uses, to check on you. Make sure everything is fine. In about eight and a half months, we’ll know what we’ve welcomed into this world and how beautiful he or she will be.”
She stroked his shoulder, brushing strands of hair from his face so she could see his eyes better. “You’re going to be a father.”
He nodded, smiling wider. Reaching for her, he pulled her to his side, clinging to her as though his life depended on it. “And a husband to an awesome wife.”
She snuggled closer, inhaling his powerfully masculine scent and that of the puma, reveling in how her life had changed for the better in the last few weeks. “You’re my beautiful mate,” she whispered.
“And you are, too, my love, my mate.”
###
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Sascha Illyvich
About the Author
Sascha Illyvich, proclaimed by the publishing industry as The Bad Boy of Romance, started writing sixteen years ago. His erotic romances have been listed under Night Owl Romance’s and Road to Romance’s Recommended read lists, and he’s been nominated for a CAPA by The Romance Studio. Recently, Torn to Pieces was a USA TODAY Recommended Read.
Sascha is a trained and experienced public speaker, and enjoys giving talks and teaching, particularly on aspects of romance, erotic romance, and writing. He was the former host of The Unnamed Romance Show on Radio Dentata, and is fond of doing guest spots and interviews, on both traditional radio and podcasts.
Find him at http://saschaillyvichauthor.com
Acknowledgments
Without the following individuals, this book might not have been written. I spend so much of my time in the darkness of these characters heads, trying to bring them into the light while avoiding my own Hell that coming out into reality is often difficult. I'd like to acknowledge the people around me during the writing of the book, so we'll start this off proper with my ex, Seletta. She believed in my writing career from day one and her support has been paramount to me since then. Kaitlyn, you've believed in me too, the push when I wanted to throw all of this away was needed. Katie Sparkles, we reconnected when
I was writing this book and I can't be happier to have found you this lifetime. Max Myers of ACC Cigars got dropped into this book because of cigar smoking, thanks for that refreshing bit of pure indulgence. Your book is next. Momma Lion, thank you for some of your marketing ideas. Christine, Genesis, Momma Lioness (different heartmate), Lili, Miranda, Angelia, Attilia, and anyone else I forgot, your support has come in many different forms and for that, I am eternally grateful. Thank you from the very bottom of my heart.
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