Tears filled her eyes as she heard her own words, the ramifications of what she’d done to him hitting home again. ‘I’m sorry,’ she gasped, salty, stinging tears rolling down her cheeks. ‘I’m so, so sorry that I did it to you again…’
‘Louise!’ His voice was firm, hands holding her shoulders, forcing her to face him, and when that didn’t work he shook her gently, until finally she dared. ‘Don’t ever compare yourself to her. You gave me a son, you gave me a child I never thought I could have…’
‘But I didn’t tell you.’
‘And now I understand why.’ She could hear the strength back in his voice now, the strong, resilient man she adored back now, steadying her, soothing her, understanding her. ‘All you ever did was try to love me, and all I ever did was push you away. I swore, the day I found out what Kate had done, that I’d never let anyone close again. I was the only one on that ward who welcomed isolation, welcomed the chance to shut the world out—but I know that I was wrong. That’s why I spent time with Jordan. I could see him doing what I had—and I didn’t want him living the life that follows.
‘You were the best thing that ever happened to me, Louise. The day you walked over to do that ward round in London, smiled that dizzy smile—I fell in love, even though I didn’t want to.’
Which was a whole lot better than adore—a whole lot—and if she hadn’t been crying so hard she’d have stopped him right there, made him say it all over again. But instead she listened, listened as this beautiful, complicated man told her what was in his heart.
‘And it terrified me,’ Daniel admitted. ‘Terrified me, because I hadn’t felt that way in more than a decade, had sworn I’d never allow myself to feel that way again. So I ended it, even kidded myself that I was doing you a favour, that you deserved someone who could give you a baby—but the truth was I just didn’t want to get hurt again.’
‘I’d never have hurt you…’ Louise gulped.
‘I took care of that myself,’ Daniel said softly. ‘I soon realised what a stupid mistake I’d made so I came to Australia, thought I’d get myself a job and get settled and then I’d look you up. But I just couldn’t do that last bit. I knew that if I told you how much you meant to me…’
‘You really came here for me?’
‘It’s the only reason I’m here, Louise.’
And he said it so firmly she knew it was the absolute truth. Reeling inside that this man she had thought so barren of emotion would follow her to the other side of the world. That he loved her enough to give it all up and follow his heart. If he’d stopped talking there and then, it would have been enough, for not a single doubt shadowed her mind now. But he was making up for so much lost time, revealing not just to her but himself the true depth of his emotions…
And she loved him even more for it.
‘When I found out you had a baby, I was disappointed, angry even. Hell, I hadn’t expected you to go into a life of seclusion, but after what we had together I thought you’d need some time—but it still didn’t stop the way I was feeling. The night I came to the flat I was really hoping we could sort things out—had even kidded myself that maybe it was for the best. If I couldn’t give you a child, then…’
‘You really would have taken Declan on, even if he wasn’t yours?’
‘I don’t know,’ he admitted softly. ‘But I was prepared to try. I just couldn’t stand the thought of you lying to me, telling me he was mine when I knew…’
‘You knew nothing,’ Louise said softly. ‘You knew nothing about how I felt about you. Daniel, there could never have been anyone else—a year on and I was still trying to get over you, and failing spectacularly!’
‘That morning when you were feeding him…’ he looked at her as if she should know the one he meant, but Louise gave a bemused frown.
‘I feed him every morning.’
‘That last morning,’ he said. ‘You’d had a full night’s sleep and you said you felt wonderful. You looked wonderful, Louise, you were wonderful, and I hated myself because I still couldn’t tell you what I was really feeling, still couldn’t even admit it to myself.’
‘So,’ she said slowly, ‘what are you feeling now?’
‘That I can’t do this for a moment longer. I love you, Louise, and I can’t fight with you over a baby we both love, too. And I can’t blame you for all my mistakes.’
‘But can you forgive me for mine?’ Louise asked, because it was important, because she couldn’t live the rest of her life defending herself, but as Daniel answered her with a kiss, she soon realised that neither could he.
‘Marry me,’ Daniel said, much, much later, when his pager was screaming in his pocket and Louise was trying to work out an excuse for an extremely prolonged coffee-break! ‘Tomorrow.’
‘It’s not that easy.’ Louise grinned, and she didn’t even need to qualify it, didn’t need to explain to him she was questioning the date, not the fact they would be together.
‘Why not?’ Daniel grumbled.
‘I think you need a licence or something.’ Louise giggled. ‘And given that you’re only here on holiday…’
‘Hmm,’ Daniel said, clearly trying to work his way around the problem.
‘I have to get back,’ Louise said reluctantly. ‘How on earth am I going to explain to May where I’ve been? She just offered me a permanent job and this is how I repay her!’
‘Tell her that Mr Ashwood just proposed to you,’ Daniel grinned
‘Well, it would be the perfect excuse.’ Louise laughed, knowing she’d never do it in a million years. Her hand was on the door as she reluctantly headed back to work, but it was too late because May was already opening it, flustered and more than a little annoyed.
‘Where on earth have you been, Louise? Oh.’ Momentarily she faltered. ‘Hello, Mr Ashwood. Sorry, Louise, I didn’t realise you were already back from your break!’
‘Actually, she’s not.’ Daniel smiled at the elderly sister. ‘It’s entirely my fault she’s late back, May. You see…’
Louise’s mouth gaped open. She truly thought he had been joking, couldn’t believe that Daniel was going to share this happy news, couldn’t believe the smile on that usually impassive face. And clearly neither could May because she was frowning at the change in the usually distant consultant. ‘I was just proposing to her.’
‘Proposing what exactly?’ May asked dubiously, her eyes swivelling from Daniel to Louise and then back to Daniel.
‘Marriage!’ Daniel beamed and May started to smile, too.
‘And did she give you a reply?’
‘Actually, now you mention it, no, she didn’t.’
‘Two minutes,’ May said sternly, as she looked over at Louise, but her eyes were smiling. ‘And you can make up the time during your lunch-break!’
Alone again with him, she smiled shyly.
‘Yes, please.’
‘When?’ Daniel asked. ‘I’m not going to give you a moment to change your mind. We’ll just have to sort out the immigration and stuff!’
Louise had the perfect answer.
‘I know the name of a very good solicitor,’ she said, coming over and whispering into his ear, imagining the look on Ms Corporate Suit’s face when they strolled into her office hand in hand.
As a family.
EPILOGUE
‘DID you know that at some of the London hospitals, if it’s your second baby, you get a free tummy tuck!’
They were thirty thousand feet in the air, the three of them snuggled in the leather seats of business class, courtesy of the fact she was six months pregnant and on their way to a whole new life.
How dare he try to sleep?
‘I must have missed that article in the BMJ,’ Daniel drawled, pulling up his eyeshields and taking the glossy magazine she was reading. After flicking on his reading light and skimming through the article she had slowly devoured, he said, ‘She had a Caesarean.’
‘I might have to have one.’ Louise beamed hopefully. ‘And
given you’re a consultant there, maybe they’ll give me a freebie, too.’
‘Louise,’ Daniel said patiently, ‘they don’t give free tummy tucks, and even if they did, why on earth do you think that you’d need one?’
‘I don’t need one.’ Louise shrugged. ‘But if I did have to have a Caesarean and the surgeon offered—’
‘Which he wouldn’t,’ Daniel interrupted.
‘Well, if he does, remember to say yes for me,’ Louise mumbled, as he pulled down his eyeshields and, because he was male, managed to fall asleep in a matter of seconds.
Or so she thought.
‘I promise,’ Daniel said solemnly a few moments later, pulling off his eyeshields and tossing them over his shoulder, giving up on the only chance of sleep he’d had in the last twenty-four hours, ‘that if you have a Caesarean, and if Greg Harrison offers a quick nip and tuck at the same time, I’ll sign the form on your behalf!’
‘Thank you.’ Louise smiled, not because he’d agreed but because he’d taken his eyeshields off, because he understood that she needed him now.
‘What’s wrong?’
‘Nothing,’ Louise answered, but Daniel gave her a very disbelieving frown.
‘Are you worried about missing your family?’
‘Heavens, no.’ She rolled her eyes. ‘In fact, from the way they’re talking about coming over to visit, I think I’m going to be seeing more of them living in London than I did when I was in Melbourne.’
‘You know a lot of people in London,’ Daniel reminded her, in case that was what was on her mind. ‘And Maggie might be back in a few months.’
‘I know.’ Louise nodded but she knew he was waiting for her to elaborate, knew that the silence between them would have to be filled soon.
Because that was how it was now—no holding back, no letting problems fester. All the love and honesty she’d always craved surrounded her now. The Daniel she had always known had been there was beside her now, and she was never going to let him slip back to his old ways—never going to let him shut her out for even a moment—and, therefore, Louise knew that neither, then, must she.
‘So what’s wrong?’ Daniel pushed, breaking into her thoughts. ‘And don’t say “Nothing” again.’
‘But that’s the problem!’ Louise answered cryptically. ‘Nothing! I haven’t got a single thing to worry about. I can’t wait to start our new life in London, Declan’s growing more gorgeous every minute, and I just know the baby’s going to be fine…’ She watched as his hand moved across and tenderly stroked her ripe stomach. ‘Everyone says that second labours are easy-peasy and I know this time I’ll have you with me. It’s just…’
‘Just what, Louise?’
She blurted it out, just blurted it out, half expecting him to laugh, half expecting him to put his eyeshields on and go back to sleep. ‘I just can’t get used to feeling this happy.’
He didn’t laugh, didn’t even smile, just nodded his understanding.
‘Sometimes I wake up in the night and think that surely it can’t last…’
‘Don’t you think we’ve had our share of problems?’ Daniel asked. ‘That maybe we both deserve to feel like this for a while?’
‘That’s just it,’ Louise answered. ‘Now I’m worrying about when the bubble will burst.’
‘How about never?’ Daniel offered, but Louise shook her head, sure that it couldn’t be that easy. ‘OK how about I promise that I’m going to spend the rest of my life making sure the bubble stays intact?’
‘And if it doesn’t?’ Louise asked. ‘They’re very fragile, you know!’
‘Then I’ll blow us another one,’ Daniel said assuredly. ‘Because nothing’s going to come between us, Louise, and I reckon that together we can deal with just about anything. Which means just one thing…’
Reaching out for her in the dimmed cabin, her kissed her softly. ‘You, Mrs Ashwood, are just going to have to get used to being happy!’
ISBN: 978-1-474-05728-8
THE SURGEON’S MIRACLE BABY
© 2006 Carol Marinelli
Published in Great Britain 2016
by Mills & Boon, an imprint of HarperCollinsPublishers 1 London Bridge Street, London, SE1 9GF
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