by A. M. Myers
Never Let Me Go
Bayou Devils MC
Book Six
A.M. Myers
For Linzi,
My PA and my bestie.
We both know I’d be lost without you.
Cover Design by Jay Aheer
Proofreading by Julie Deaton
Copyright © 2019 by A.M. Myers
First Edition
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law.
Chapter One
Juliette
“Baby,” a voice whispers through the darkness, his voice calling out to me through the haze of the darkness swallowing me up. It claws at me, frantically trying to pull me back into its debilitating embrace but that voice… it commands me, urges me to fight the faux warmth of the darkness. “I miss you. Open your eyes… please.”
The plea in his voice is so potent, so sorrowful, that I ache to reach out and let him know that I can hear him and everything will be okay. But… who is he? He sounds kind of familiar but I just can’t quite place it, like I’m scratching at the memory but unable to dislodge it. It’s maddening.
“Juliette,” he says, his voice cracking. Oh, God, who is this man and why does he sound so heartbroken as he calls my name? My heart twinges at the desperation pouring off of him. Everything begins to hit me at once as I drift further from the darkness trying to hold me captive. There’s a steady beeping sound to my right that soothes me but from somewhere else, I can hear an alarm blaring. Hushed voices hit me next, too quiet to be understood, and the smell of disinfectant fills my nose.
“Good evening, sir,” a woman says, her feet shuffling on the floor as she approaches us. Her hands are cold are she presses her fingers to the inside of my wrist, checking my pulse. “I’m Colleen, the night nurse. Is there anything you need right now?”
“No,” my mystery man answers as he grabs my hand and cradles it between both of his. The farther I float from the darkness, the more the real world comes into focus. Every part of my body throbs with more pain than I’ve ever felt in my life and my throat is bone dry as I try to move my fingers to get someone’s attention.
Mystery man gasps. “Juliette?”
“Is there a problem, Mr. Hale?”
“She just moved her finger a little bit.”
“Hmm,” the woman hums as she pulls her fingers from my wrist. “I don’t see any change to her vitals. It’s possible it was just a reflex.”
He grips my hand a little tighter. “No. She moved. I’m sure of it. Get the doctor in here now.”
“Mr. Hale,” she sighs. “I know this is hard but as I said, I’m sure it was just a muscle spasm. It’s quite common in coma patients and I see no change in her condition. She would be in quite a bit of pain from the accident. If she was waking up, I would expect to see her heart rate go up at least a little bit.”
“She moved,” he growls, gripping my hand even tighter and I whimper as pain shoots up my arm. The pressure disappears immediately as the woman gasps.
“Miss Shaw? Can you hear me, honey?” She presses her fingers to the inside of my wrist, checking my pulse again, and I try to move but stop when my body screams in protest.
Oh, shit, that hurts.
I focus on each breath being pulled into my lungs as the pain slowly fades back down to a more manageable level before attempting to open my eyes. It feels like they’re glued shut and I want to cry and scream at my body to just do what I tell it to.
“Jules, baby?” the mystery man asks, his warm, minty breath hitting my face as he leans in close and cups my cheek in his hand. “Can you open your eyes and look at me?”
The excitement and hope in his voice urges me on, despite the pain, and I slowly suck in a breath as I peel my eyes open, blinking at the harsh florescent light above me as I resist the overwhelming urge to shut them again. I try to move once more and cry out. Pain shoots through me like an arrow and tears sting my eyes.
Oh, good god, what the hell happened to me?
“There she is,” mystery man whispers as I lock onto his piercing blue eyes hovering above mine and suck in a breath. Those are the kind of eyes a girl could spend her whole life getting lost in and if that wasn’t enough, they have that mischievous sparkle that can get a very smart girl to do very dumb things in the name of love. But it occurs to me, that as gorgeous as his eyes are, I don’t recognize them.
“Welcome back to the land of the living, sweetie,” the woman says and I turn away from mystery man to glance at her. She’s older with big blonde hair that reminds me of every soccer mom ever but her smile is sweet. “I’m Colleen, your night nurse. How are you feeling?”
“Ow,” I squeak, my throat dry and painful. Raising my hand, I grip my throat to reiterate my point and she nods before turning to grab a small cup of water from the bedside table. She holds the straw in front of my lips and I take a sip, closing my eyes as the cool water coats my throat. I take another drink and she pulls the cup away.
“Small sips.”
I nod and when she presses the straw to my lips again, I take a couple small sips of the cool refreshing liquid before pulling back and nodding to her. She smiles in encouragement and pulls the cup away, setting it back on the table next to my bed.
“Can you tell me where it hurts?”
I nod and meet her gaze. “Everywhere.”
“And on a scale of one to ten, can you rate your pain?”
“Seven, I guess.”
She grabs a pen from her pocket and a little notepad. “We’ll get some more pain meds on board for you, okay? Can you tell me your name?”
I nod. “Juliette Shaw.”
“Very good,” she answers, her smile widening. “And what is your date of birth?”
“May third, nineteen-ninety.”
She nods her approval as she jots down some notes, glancing between the paper in her hand and the monitor next to my bed. “And what year is it, Juliette?”
“Two thousand fourteen.”
Her pen stalls and her gaze snaps up to mine as her mouth falls open. “Do you know what city you’re in?”
“Baton Rouge,” I answer with a nod. She scowls before nodding and pointing to the other side of the room.
“And what about that guy there? Can you tell me who he is?”
Rolling my head to the side, I scowl and study mystery man again as he grips my hand. He’s ridiculously handsome in a classic sort of way that reminds me of expensive suits, caviar, and private planes. His medium length brown hair is slicked back, making him look completely put together, like he could throw on a suit and command a boardroom, but the stubble along his angular jaw and the dark circles under his blue eyes give away how exhausted he is. I feel like I should know him but no matter how hard I study his face or search my memories, I just can’t place him. His gaze searches mine, full of fear and hope, silently begging and as much as I would love to give him whatever he’s so desperate for, I’m not sure what he wants from me. I glance down at his hands encasing mine before slowly shaking my head and turning back to Colleen.
“No. I don’t know who he is.”
“Oh, God,” he whispers, pain filling his voice as he drops his forehead to our hands. Colleen scowls.
“Okay. Let me go tell the doctors you’re awake.”
“Juliette,” mystery man says as soon as she leaves the room and I turn back to him, my gaze falling
to our entwined hands again. I don’t want to be rude but it’s a little too much from someone I don’t even know. Although he seems to know me very well which makes me wonder again, who the hell is he? I suck in a breath and drop my head back onto the pillow.
Okay, what do I know?
Clearly, I’m in a hospital and something horrible happened to me since I feel like I’ve gone ten rounds with a heavyweight. What’s the last thing I remember? I got off work and called Mercedes to see if she wanted to go out for drinks and we went to that country bar downtown that we love so much. After a few drinks, we decided to go home and shared a cab and then… nothing.
“Juliette? You still with me?” mystery man asks and my eyes snap open. I meet his gaze and nod.
“Yeah.” My throat aches and I point to the cup of water. “Could I have some more of that?”
He nods and releases my hand to grab the cup from the bedside table as I breathe a sigh of relief. As he brings the cup back to me and holds the straw in front of my lips, I tuck my hand under my leg and lean forward to take a sip as my muscles scream in protest. Studying him, I search my memories for his face. Maybe I met him at the bar… although I feel like I would definitely remember if I did and he doesn’t really seem the type to hang out in a country bar no matter how much fun the mechanical bull is.
“Thank you,” I whisper as I pull away and he nods as he sets the cup back down and reclaims his seat next to my bed. He reaches for my hand, frowning when he realizes that I’ve hidden it. As he meets my gaze, he sighs and folds his hands on the bed.
“Who are you?” I ask before he can say anything else. Maybe it’s rude of me to be so forward but I need answers and I have no qualms about starting here. He opens his mouth but before he can say anything, a tall man in a white coat walks into the room.
“Good Morning, Miss Shaw. I’m Dr. Wilson. How are you feeling?”
I open my mouth to reply before looking back at mystery man. I have no clue how to answer that question. It’s like I’m hovering over my body, watching this all go down as they both stare at me, waiting for my answer. I’m quick enough to realize that I’m missing something here but I can’t, for the life of me, figure out what it is. Mystery man sighs.
“I think she’s a little confused.”
“So I heard,” he replies, frowning as he glances down at my chart. “Are you in any pain?”
“Only when I breathe,” I quip and a smile tugs at his lips, his brown eyes sparkling as he meets my gaze.
“Well, it’s good to see you still have a sense of humor. Can you rate the pain for me?”
I nod. “Probably a five until I move; then, it’s a seven.”
“That’s to be expected,” he answers, flipping through a few pages and scanning them before looking up at me again. “Colleen tells me you’re having some trouble with your memory. Can you tell me the last thing you do remember?”
“Uh… I was having drinks with my best friend, Mercedes, to celebrate me moving to Miami… and then I woke up here. What happened to me?”
He sighs as he folds his hands in front of his body. “You were in a very serious car accident, Miss Shaw, and you’ve been in a coma for the past week.”
“What?” I gasp, my eyes growing wide as I stare up at him. My mind drifts to Mercedes. We took a cab back to my place after the club. “What about my friend, Mercedes? Is she okay?”
The doctor glances at mystery man before turning back to me. “Can you tell me what year it is, Miss Shaw?”
“Two thousand fourteen,” I answer, my patience quickly slipping away. Why the hell is he avoiding my questions about Mercedes? Did something happen to her? “Is Mercedes okay? She was in the car with me after the bar. We were going back to our apartment.”
Dr. Wilson sighs, compassion flashing across his face. “Miss Shaw, your friend, Mercedes, wasn’t with you.”
“Yes, she was,” I insist, interrupting him. I don’t know what kind of game he’s playing but I want to know where Mercedes is. That girl is like the sister I never had and if something happened to her, I’ll never forgive myself for forcing her to go out for drinks with me.
“Juliette,” he says, his voice soft but commanding. “She wasn’t with you when you came in because it’s two thousand nineteen, not two thousand fourteen. You’re in Miami and the man sitting beside you is your fiancé.”
“What?” I ask, my mind reeling as my gaze flicks back and forth between the two of them. Mystery man offers me a hopeful smile. “No. That can’t be right.”
“It is right, baby,” the man… my fiancé… says, grabbing my hand again and I stare at him with wide eyes. “I’m Gavin, your fiancé.”
I slowly shake my head, my heart thundering in my chest as my head aches. No, this isn’t right. “I don’t have a boyfriend… or a fiancé. I only broke up with Rick a few weeks ago. He… didn’t want to make the move with me so we ended things.”
“That was five years ago, sweetheart,” Gavin says, his voice soft and I continue shaking my head. No, it wasn’t. It was just three weeks ago. None of this makes any sense. Tears sting my eyes as I look back and forth between the two of them again, trying to organize my thoughts and make sense of everything they’re saying but after a few moments, it’s still a jumbled mess. I turn to Gavin.
“You’re my…”
“Fiancé,” he supplies with a nod and I suck in a breath as I mirror him. How is this possible? How can I be engaged to a man that I don’t even know?
“And how long have we been together?”
He smiles as he reaches up toward my face. I jerk back on instinct and his expression falls as well as his hand. Guilt fills me.
“I’m sorry.”
“Nine months,” he answers, his voice low and full of pain. “We’ve been together for nine months.”
“I…” I start before snapping my mouth shut. The sorrow in his eyes makes me ache for him but I have no clue what to say. Even as I stare at him, knowing that he’s my fiancé and searching my memory for just a glimpse of his face, I don’t recognize him. He’s a complete stranger to me.
“So, they didn’t have any Sprite…” a woman says as she walks into the room. Her voice trails off as she stops and turns to look at me, her eyes popping open before she grins. “You’re awake!”
She sets a can of Mountain Dew down on the table and runs over to me, knocking the doctor out of the way and he grunts.
“Oh my God, Jules. I was beginning to think we lost you,” she says as she wraps her arms around me and I wince as pain washes over me. She pulls back with an apologetic expression. “Sorry, babe. How are you feeling?”
I study her as she stares back at me, trying desperately to place her but she’s just as much of a mystery to me as the man to my left. She’s adorable with her purple streaked dark hair and combat boots and something about her makes me feel at ease but I have no clue who she is or how I’m supposed to know her. I frown.
“I’m sorry. Who are you?”
Her gaze snaps up to Gavin before returning to me. “I’m Nico… your personal assistant and like best friend. You don’t remember me?”
“She doesn’t remember me either,” Gavin adds and I didn’t think it was possible but Nico’s eyes widen even more before she turns to the doctor.
“What the hell is going on here?” she demands, getting in his face with a ferociousness that surprises me. “Why doesn’t she remember us?”
“Miss Shaw,” Dr. Wilson prompts as he turns to me, completely unbothered by Nico’s outburst. “Are you okay with me discussing your medical condition in front of Mr. Hale and Miss Harris?”
I shrug. “Yeah, I guess.”
“Okay,” he answers, stepping forward and placing a comforting hand on my shoulder. “One week ago, you were in a very serious car accident with your father. You sustained a serious head injury in that accident as well as a few cracked ribs. All in all, I’d say you are incredibly lucky. Your injuries should have been much worse.”
> I take in everything he’s saying but it’s like I’m in a fog. “Okay…”
“Why can’t she remember us?” Nico asks, her voice growing impatient and Dr. Wilson sighs.
“I can’t be certain until we run some more tests but based on everything I’ve seen so far, it seems she’s suffering from retrograde amnesia.” He turns his attention to me. “As I mentioned before, it is two thousand nineteen and you seem to be missing the last five years of your life.”
“I can’t believe this,” I whisper, laying my head back against the pillow as I stare up at the tiles of the ceiling. How can I just not remember the last five years of my life?
Years where I apparently moved to Miami to be closer to my father and met someone I loved enough to get engaged?
How is all of that just gone?
My mind drifts over everything he just told me when I realize that he said my father was in the accident with me. I turn to him.
“You said my dad was in the accident, too?”
He nods.
“Is he okay? Can we call him and get him here?”
I may not recognize the man sitting next to me or the woman standing at the end of the bed, staring at me expectantly but there is no way I won’t recognize my own father. It has been just the two of us since my mother died when I was nine and I am a total daddy’s girl. He is my whole world and the reason I’m moving from Baton Rouge to Miami. No, wait… the reason I did move. Sucking in a breath, I remind myself that it’s five years later than I think it is. Dr. Wilson sighs, shaking his head.
“I’m so sorry, Miss Shaw. Your father was brought into the ER after the accident and he had already lost a significant amount of blood. We worked tirelessly on him but we were unable to save him.”
I blink and tears sting my eyes. “He’s… dead?”
“Yes.” He nods. “Again, I’m so sorry.”
Sucking in a stuttered breath, I drop my gaze to my lap and twist my fingers together as a sob tears through me. Tears spill down my cheeks and I clamp my lips together to fight back another sob but it overpowers me anyway. My body aches for someone to wrap their arms around me, provide me even a molecule of comfort, but the one man I need the most right now, the one man I’ve always had in my corner, I’ll never see again.