“Don’t you dare,” I said. “Can’t you hire a good divorce attorney and get free of him?”
“Don’t think I haven’t tried,” she tucked the smokes back in her purse. “There isn’t an attorney on the west coast of Florida who is willing to take my case. They don’t want to face off against him. He plays really dirty. I’m trapped unless he dies.”
We had passed through old town and were rolling along the beach road. Not a soul was out as we edged onto the bridge between night and morning. Lizzy directed me to the marked beach road we had used earlier in the day.
“Here we are!” she said, foraging in her purse and rattling her keys.
The gingerbread cottage sat bathed in the moonlight. I heard a dog howling.
“That’s WonderDog! There’s something wrong!” She jumped from my car and raced up the three wobbly stairs with me close behind her. The moon slipped behind a bank of clouds, but there was a night light on over the door.
“I’m coming Wonder!” she called. I watched as she struggled with the keys finally fitting the right one in the lock. As she opened the door, the big hound threw himself at her causing her to fall backward. Luckily, I caught her, and she remained standing.
She fumbled for a switch on the wall and the cottage turned bright. The mood of the beach bungalow had changed from that morning; what had once been a cheery place now held a scary atmosphere. It was like the scene in a movie where you find yourself yelling “Get out of the house!”
WonderDog clung to Lizzy’s side, his tail beating a tattoo on the kitchen wall as we inched along the cabinets. There was no reason to be frightened since nothing was out of place—or was it?
A butcher’s block sat on the counter. I grabbed one of the knife handles. It belonged to a grapefruit knife, but it was better than nothing. Lizzy put her hand out to stop me. “Wait!” she said. “Where are my finches?” She tweeted for them as she went through the kitchen and family room, and into the sunroom.
“My birds are gone!” Her lower lip trembled. Lizzy’s tone turned frantic as she made cheeping noises. Not a single finch surfaced.
I scooted passed her to check the back door. It was wide open. Side by side, me carrying the fruit knife, and WonderDog shivering behind us, we went into her bedroom. When she clicked on the lamp, we both screamed. I fell back against the doorframe while Lizzy made a growling sound.
Someone scrawled obscenities across the mirror over her dressing table. I would never have expected this sort of goings-on in a sweet place like Starfish Cove. With trepidation, I inched closer. The markings were written in pink lip gloss and red lipstick and ran from nasty to nonsense.
PIG! TART!
WOMDAMPY!
NO GOOD! LUBBER!
It wasn’t just the words but the terrifying way they were written. It was the work of a lunatic. Only half the words were coherent. My professional side told me someone had a complete breakdown.
I was trained to deal calmly with this sort of manic attack, so I screamed. “Let’s get out of here!” I took a stance I had learned in self-defense class, holding the fruit knife in front of me. Pity the poor orange that dared to assault us.
It didn’t take much urging to get Lizzy to agree to spend the night at my place. I looked at her face and could see the violation she was feeling. Someone had vandalized her sanctuary. Her sense of home would never be the same.
Lizzy grabbed WonderDog’s leash and clipped it to his collar. “This may look like gibberish, but this has Sterling Kelly written all over it!” she said. “He’s just trying to scare me.” She glanced around, her eyes reflecting her misery. “That beast let my finches get loose. The poor babies can’t possibly survive attacks from the nighthawks. I hate him!”
I was more shaken than my friend. She was fired up with anger and revenge; I recognized this form of cruelty—it was the kind that would repeat and repeat. Kelly was trying to wear her down.
“Sterling knows beachies well enough to guess where we keep spare door keys,” she said. “Like most beach folks I hide an extra key under the fake rock near the front door. I know I should have been smarter, but with him it would do no good. Not having the key, he would have broken the door down. His breaking and entering on top of reporting me for car theft—something has set him off.”
We gathered a change of clothes for Lizzy, but no makeup as neither of us wished to touch the dressing table—it was a frightening sight. I bolted out the door and Lizzy followed, locking it behind her.
WonderDog leaped into the back seat of my car, and Lizzy buckled him in. She patted his head. “You are a brave boy! We are going to spend the night at Aunt Olive’s.”
By the time we arrived at Nonna’s condo the sky was growing lighter. We decided to call Kal after we performed our ashes scattering ceremony. There was no sense in drawing him here until we were done with our illegal act. Besides, I was certain he would write off Sterling’s actions as an I told you so.
Chapter 11
I washed the weariness from my eyes and then dabbed cold cream on my cheeks. It soaked into my tired skin causing me to look instantly refreshed, not perfect but better. Leaning closer to the mirror, I admired the effect. A quick brush out and I was ready to sprinkle Nonna.
Puff ran under my bed when WonderDog loped into the living room.
I called to the kitten. She didn’t come. I knelt and peeked under the bed. She wasn’t there.
Crash! The sound of breaking glass sent me running into the living room.
A framed Sophia lay shattered on the floor. WonderDog sat some distance away with Puff perched on his head. It couldn’t have been those two innocent looking pets that broke the picture. No…not those darlings.
“Sorry!” Lizzy said, coming out of the guest bathroom. “They were playing chase.” She was wearing a retro pants suit in a shade of lime green not seen since the 60s. Her bellbottom slacks dusted the top of her shoes and revealed a pair of matching green wedge slip-ons.
Puff dropped from Wonder’s head and approached me cautiously. She rubbed herself on my ankles giving me the full kitty love treatment. I handed her to Lizzy.
“Please hold her while I sweep up.”
I just finished dumping the last bit of broken glass in the trash when the doorbell rang. Ivy was spot on time. She stood there looking professional with her pink canvas sack ready to assist in our illegal act.
Ivy transferred the urn to the shell collector’s bag. I placed Puff in my bedroom while Wonder Dog stood guard in the foyer. We were off to fulfill my grandmother’s wishes.
Lizzy, Ivy, and I were silent as we stepped into the elevator. We could have taken the stairs but somehow it seemed more in keeping with the ceremony to use the lift. I clutched the pink bag to my chest and studied my companions. We looked as guilty as a trio of burglars.
The elevator doors slid open, and we walked into the sand, leaving our shoes in the shadow of the outdoor shower. How many times had Nonna and I stood on this very spot, never once imagining our final adventure?
The three of us stepped quickly through the cold, rough sand, unable to see the broken shells, vines, and driftwood that littered the beach. We became a chorus of ouches as we headed to the shoreline and then away from the view of any early risers in Sandy Shores Towers.
With my back to the condominiums, I struggled to open the urn while keeping it hidden in the bag. Ivy put her hand on mine. “Not to worry. Everybody does it. It’s what Izzie wanted.”
Unable to bring myself to reach in the urn I held it, bag and all, intending to lift it high and let the ashes fly. Instead, I stumbled over a knot of seaweed, and the urn tipped in the bag. The ashes dumped in a lump onto the wet sand at my feet. “Oh no!” I couldn’t hold back my tears. “So sorry Nonna!”
I was kneeling in the sand frantically whisking at the pile of ashes when I heard Lizzy yelp. “Geez, Louise! It’s the cops!”
The first thought that popped into my mind, not that I was fully equipped to think coherentl
y after last night, was that law enforcement had cameras focused on the beach targeted at ash sprinklers. How else were they able to strike so quickly?
“Bye Nonna!” I flicked the pile again causing some ash to blow away. With a fumble, I drew the urn from the shell bag and returned the canvas to Ivy’s hands.
“Ms. Kelly? Ms. Peroni?” Kal jogged towards us wearing shorts and a T-shirt and a frown. He must be a morning beach runner. Talk about bad timing. A few minutes more and he would have been beyond Sandy Shores Towers and not seen us. Dang!
He looked at Ivy. “Mrs. LaVine. Weren’t you cited last year for ignoring the law on cremains? Hand over the bag.”
He opened it and then mumbled something about it being too dark out to gather shells. He seemed almost relieved to see the bag was empty although there was a telltale ring of gray around the rim of the canvas.
I slipped the urn behind my back. “Who have you there, Ms. Peroni?” He appeared to be struggling to hold his expression stern. The guy didn’t miss a trick.
“My grandmother,” I said, glad it was still hazy out as I felt myself turn scarlet. I was now officially a scofflaw.
He snorted, but his expression softened. “I will let you finish what you started. I have a strong suspicion Mrs. LaVine didn’t explain the law to you.”
I played stupid, which given the circumstances wasn’t a challenging performance. I stood still while he recited the law or read me my rights; I was too flustered to pay attention. Out of the corner of my eye, I watched more ashes blow away, just a tiny pile remained until a gentle wave took the rest of Isabella Peroni out to sea.
It was obvious that he quoted the statute many times. “The federal Clean Water Act requires that cremated remains are scattered at least three nautical miles from land. You have to dispose of the container separately if it won’t dissolve in the water. The EPA does not permit scattering on the beaches. It is an offense.”
That was more information than I needed. A shiver worked its way up my spine. Lizzy peeked at me and shook her head. She didn’t have to warn me. This was not the time to tell the cop about Sterling Kelly’s creepy vandalism. We were a mini crime wave, both as victims and perpetrators.
Kal turned to Ivy. “Mrs. LaVine, this is becoming a habit. The next time I will have to arrest you. No more ashes on the shore. Hire a boat. My condolences for your loss, Ms. Peroni. Have a good day, ladies.”
He continued jogging up the beach. I hoped Nonna wasn’t too upset with her loopy send-off. There were no do-overs on this one. The three of us stood in silence for a long moment, staring at to sea.
“Amen,” Ivy said, as if she had been saying a silent prayer. “Let’s get away from here before one of the residents sees my shell bag.” She scuttled over the sand like a little crab. Lizzy and I followed.
Standing by the foot shower waiting my turn, I held my hand to my heart to ease the drumming. As the water trickled over my feet, I closed my eyes remembering the last time I had performed this ritual with my grandmother.
Lizzy, Ivy, and I slipped on our shoes without speaking. There was a finality about what we had just done, and words would only break the spell. We returned to the elevator in awkward silence.
“Ivy, I have a little thank you gift. Nonna would want me to give it to you,” I said, beckoning my grandmother’s friend to join us.
“I just have a few minutes to spare, dearie. I have a blind date for breakfast. One of those online sites for over…well, over a certain age.” She blushed.
Once in Nonna’s foyer I dashed into the kitchen, grabbed a jar from the counter and took it to Ivy. “Lizzy and I brewed some of Nonna’s miracle cream yesterday. You are the first to try our version. You must tell us if we did justice to the Peroni recipe.”
The silver fox gave me a hug as she accepted the jar of cold cream. “This is the best news ever! I can’t wait to tell my friends. The miracle beauty pack is back!”
“Please tell no one, yet. We may not have my grandmother’s touch. Promise you will keep this a secret.”
“Even if you don’t have it right the first time, practice makes perfect!” She hugged herself. “I am so excited! Thank you! I will use it right now. I’ll be radiant for my blind date.”
She scooted out the door and toddled to the elevator without promising to keep our secret. Why did I feel the cream was out of the bag? It was too late now. I closed my eyes and let out a deep sigh. A part of me was certain Nonna was smiling down from heaven.
Chapter 12
I knew it was wrong to give-in to Lizzy’s pleading for me to drive her to Sterling Kelly’s mini-mansion, but I was curious to meet a prominent lawyer who used lip gloss to scribble insults on his wife’s mirror. A vandal-prone kid would think twice about such a knuckleheaded stunt. More than the act, the incoherent message had me concerned. Any man who would accuse his ex-wife of womdampy was a man on the edge and burdened with a serious spelling problem.
The night table clock read 7:30 a.m. There was time enough to shower and shampoo. I arrived in Starfish Cove less than twenty-four hours earlier and had already sprinkled my grandmother, been threatened with arrest, and adopted a new friend and her offbeat dog. Now I was about to support Lizzy as she wrangled her car from her half-baked husband.
While I finished readying myself for our mission, Lizzy paced the balcony chattering on her cell phone. She excused herself to talk about a real estate deal, but it appeared to be an excuse to smoke. I glimpsed her taking frequent deep wafts from a cigarette. She was almost frantic about her puffing; perhaps she thought it would have to last her until we parted later in the day.
We agreed not to tell Kal the cop about the lip gloss attack—not yet, if ever. “Petty divorce stuff,” Lizzy said. She brushed aside my suggestion of a rental car. “All my real estate papers are in my Jag, plus a deal is a deal. Sterling promised me that car.” She was every bit as stubborn as he was.
I towel dried my hair, ran a blower through it, bending the ends under with the brush. Then I slathered on a dab of Nonna’s cream, and a flick of mascara. I avoided using any lipstick as the sight of it would bring back memories of last night.
“Do I look okay?” Lizzy asked. “I couldn’t bring myself to wear any lipstick or gloss. I feel undressed without it, but just the smell brings the nightmare back. Did it really happen?”
“It did,” I said. “But we’re going to get to the bottom of it. Trust me.”
We secured Puff in my bedroom, assigned WonderDog to guard the homestead, and dashed out the door. Dressed to impress in a business suit, I slipped behind the wheel of my car, and with Lizzy at my side. We set off to meet with her ex who was not her ex—the infamous Sterling Kelly.
Kelly owned an estate in old town section of the Cove where the streets were narrow and the houses sat close to the road. Lizzy was positive he would be home waiting for her. Just the thought that he expected my new friend to obey his demands told me he was a high-functioning control freak and a danger to her.
I felt protective of her after seeing what her almost ex was capable of and how blindly optimistic she could be. She thought she could handle anything he threw at her. My experience with Myron Meyers kept me on the cautious side.
I heard my stomach growl in the silence of the Prius as we pulled away from Sandy Shores Towers. “Mind if we get breakfast first? I have a desperate need for some protein and strong coffee.”
“We can stop at the Blue Bird Diner before we hit Sterling’s. After we retrieve my car—and we will—I have something I want to show you. It’s a surprise, for now.”
Lizzy directed me to the eatery and soon we were moaning over a buttery breakfast. She gulped her coffee, blotted her mouth and said, “I can’t wait. I am busting to tell you my surprise. She folded her hands on the table in front of her looking pleased with herself. “I made a call this morning just to confirm it was still available.”
I felt the puzzlement on my face.
“There is a little store on Starfish
Boulevard across from the beach. It’s for rent. It’s one of those old-fashioned shops with big display windows on either side of the door. It used to be an ice cream shop. We have an okay from the owner to look at it. And I know where the key is hidden.”
“Why would I want to see a defunct ice cream shop?”
“You have the makings of a much-needed business—your Nonna’s cold cream! The Florida sun is torture on the skin. If you offer the magical cold cream made from her secret recipe, the shop will be a perfect place to sell it to the public. Folks will be lined up at your door, eager to buy your wares. You might even consider adding some other beauty potions.”
She smiled a can-do smile, ready to forge into action. “Not to worry. I will help you. I can’t think of anything more fun.”
A tingle grabbed at the back of my neck and spread warm fingers into my scalp. There were other recipes in Nonna’s golden box; things like lotions, mascaras, bronzers, and sunscreens! I could see a new life opening for me. It wouldn’t pay as well as therapy, but I no longer found fulfillment in wallowing in the emotions of others. I wanted a taste of the happy life.
“Oh-oh!” Lizzy cringed low in her seat. “Nuts! Don’t turn around! It’s Jaimie. I should have remembered the Blue Bird is on her morning route. I don’t want her to know about Sterling’s antics. She’ll blabber it all over town.”
“Hey, Lizard!” a loud volume milky blonde clattered over to our table and stood over us. Pretty in a Nordic way, Jaimie wore a wraparound sundress that might have fit her when she was two sizes smaller, but now it flew open exposing more than the public should be forced to see. Her dress embarrassed me, but she seemed not to care.
“I thought that was you walking in, but my eyes are blurry from last night! Party on! Introduce me to your friend!” She wiggled her bottom onto the booth seat next to Lizzy.
Glossy Lips Page 5