by L. Ann Marie
"I'll get it and meet you in the shower." He says kissing me quick and sliding into his jeans. Fuck he's nice to look at. I roll and start moving once he's out of view. I'm smiling the whole damn time. My body is sore in the most delicious way. The second time was better than the first, it was hard and raw. I loved the rough way he has about him. Then I got to touch every bit of him sliding my hands everywhere. I liked the third time too. I laugh at my thoughts. I haven't had sex since my ex over two years ago; anything is an improvement on the vibrator. Oh shit! The MC moved all my stuff, guess the guys wouldn't think twice about a vibrator when they see sex in the open at the Club. I turn the water on and step in my new huge shower with a big smile.
Rob
I hope she's home, I need to see she's ok. I was pissed last night, I should have helped. When the call came in I was at Rena's a couple of streets over. I could have helped her. I ring the bell and wait.
What the fuck? Cloud opens the door with just jeans on. "In case you're not getting 'no', here's a better indication that you're not welcome here." His fist connects to my face. Fuckin Brothers. I land on my back.
"What the fuck?" I shake my head and look at him.
"I may not work for the Brothers but I hear and am told about every fuckin thing that happens. You wouldn't take no for an answer then you don't answer the call for help when you were the closest Brother to her. Yet here you are on her porch. Let me guess, just checking to see if she's ok because you're so concerned?" He fuckin pissed spitting the words out.
"I really was just checking. I feel bad that she was drugged and I didn't help her." I say standing up.
He punches me again. "You should you fuckin pussy. She's got Brothers protection, it doesn't matter how fuckin pissed you are, you help. You've got no business being here without calling first, you've got no right to be here at all. I'm all in with her Brother and you're not fuckin welcome." He walks back in the house and closes the door.
I see him hitting the alarm pad. Fuck. I should have called. He's all in with her. When the fuck did that happen? Fuck. I wipe my face seeing blood. Fuck. I get in my truck and my phone rings. I look at it and groan, fuckin Steve; I swipe it, "VP."
"Get to Security." Is all I get. He's gone. Fuck!
What the fuck am I doing? I was the guy that gave advice and here I am fuckin it up with my Brothers. I drive to Security. Pulling in I see Danny's truck and Pres' bike. Fuck, this isn't going to be good. When I open the door the Officers are in the hall talking. They look at me and walk into the meeting room. Not even a fuckin nod in the bunch. This is so fuckin bad.
I take a seat and look at Pres, he's pissed. "You're lucky it was Cloud opening the door. After what you did yesterday and what happened last night, her opening the door to see you could have damaged her further. Tell me what the fuck is up with you Rob."
I take a breath. "I don't know. I just wanted to see if she was ok. I should have helped her last night and felt bad."
"Fuckin showed up without a call. A-fuckin-gain." VP says in that monotone voice. A chill runs down my spine.
I run my hand down my face wincing at the pain and wonder what the fuck I look like. "I forgot about calling."
Rich stands up. "Is this a normal pattern for you? Do you just show up on their doorsteps?" He's pacing.
I just now realize I'm sitting in a room with stone cold killers that are all pissed at me. Fuck I need to calm them down. I look around the table; Tiny, VP and Danny are watching me. "You should be nervous, stupid fuck. Protection means from everythin and everyone. You get no pass for bein an Officer."
I nod at him. "I don't know what it is about her, something keeps drawing me in. I should have helped her last night but I was pissed after the meeting with Pres and Danny. I ignored it."
"Every one of our old ladies draw another brother close. Everyone has a Brother that isn't a spouse that they can count on. You're stepping over the line that no other Brother before has. She needs protection and instead of taking Cloud's back with her, you fucked it up." Danny says looking right at me.
I say his words over thinking he's gone off. "What the fuck are you talking about?"
Tiny looks over, "Fuck Brother, every old lady has a Brother that's drawn to them. Kate has me, Jess has Pres, Kelly has Jared, Mary has Doc, Nancy has Danny, and Tess has Steve then every one of us, because she's special, the list goes on but all those Brothers protect those old ladies and have their men's back. It's always been that way starting with Jess. You should have Cloud's back and be the first to stand up to protect CJ."
I look around the table as I'm thinking about the old ladies. Fuck me, he's right, now he says it I see it clear as day. "Fuck why didn't someone tell me?"
"We all just know. I got Deirdre, Bull understands and we've never talked about it. It just is." Patches says.
"How do I make it right?" I look at each one of them stopping on VP.
"You can't. She don't trust you and neither does Cloud. They got no reason to let you in. Fuck, don't trust you my fuckin self with her." He's not pissed or spitting his words out but fuck that hurts.
"Don't go back there, don't call, don't put yourself in her path. Any of those things happen your cut is lost and your tattoo is removed. She needed help last night. Guy had her clothes off and a rubber on when Jamie and Kevin walked in. Thank fuck they kept Cloud shutting down the chopper. A couple of minute sooner her clothes would have been on and the damage would have been lessened. You let the Brotherhood down and CJ was exposed to that threat along with strangers seeing her like that without a way to protect herself. There won't be a next time for you Rob." Pres says. It's what I fuckin deserve.
"Cloud's claimin her, she's family now. I don't give a fuck who you are, family comes first." VP says, he's a fuckin Indian looking like he's on the warpath. Fuck!
"She'll have no more trouble from me. I didn't understand the draw she had on me. I get it now and it makes sense. I didn't show because I was with Rena. I should have got that but I didn't. If there's no way to fix it, I'll stay away." They look more at ease than when I walked my stupid ass in. That's something.
Steve chuckles. Everyone looks his way, "you're right, but we need someone to cover her now you fucked that up." Fuck, he's in my head. He nods.
"I can go meet her and see how it goes. She may respond better to Patches though." Rich stops pacing behind me.
"Needs to be Danny right now. Already trusts him but he doesn't belong to her. Have to wait, see how it plays out." VP says.
"Maybe someone from Baxter's. We're going to their thing on Friday we can keep watch." Pres looks at VP.
"Yeah." He doesn't say anymore.
Everyone looks at Danny. "I'll add her to my fuckin schedule. Fuckin Brothers you're fuckin with my ride time." They all laugh. I watch him. He's not really pissed. Thank fuck.
"Still has your back when he's fuckin pissed plannin for your grave. Six steps ahead he is." VP says looking right at me. I throw him chin. I get it, I won't fuck it up. He nods.
"Schedule therapy. No meetings with anyone until you're cleared. Doc and Sally will cover. Work the bars." Pres says.
Fuck! "Yeah." They get up and wait for me to leave. At least I'm fuckin breathing. I hear VP laugh. Fuckin Brothers. I need to fix this; I can't let them down again. In my truck I call the therapist for an appointment.
CJ
I'm wondering what's taking him so long when he opens the door and steps in. His body is like a picture, I watch his muscles move and it turns me on. Holy shit I'm a slut. I smile touching his stomach. I spent some time touching ever piece of him, I like these muscles best.
He takes the shampoo and washes my hair. I could tell him I already did but it feels good so I keep quiet. I let him do whatever he wants, he never says a word but washes my whole body gently and with such soft hands it feels so friggin good. He's showing me he'll take care of me, kissing different places as he moves around me. My heart feels light and my eyes tear up. I don't even know his f
ull name and I think I'm falling in love with him. I take a deep breath and let it out slow. Alright I'm not falling. Fuckin brain.
He stands and kisses me, I'm glad we're in the shower and he can't see the tears. I hold onto him until he lifts his head. "It will be better than it is right now in this minute. Feel it in here CJ." He puts his hand above my heart.
I nod putting my hand on his. "I feel it Cloud. I'm glad you do too."
He nods. "Let's get out of here." He leads me out drying me then my hair. "I love your hair, it's as soft as it looks."
I laugh, "I thought the same thing when I touched yours."
As we're getting dressed he says, "I need to get my truck over here it's at Security. Can you drop me there before the kids get home?"
"Yeah, I need to drive my new van today; it's been sitting there all day waiting."
He barks out a laugh, holy shit he's beautiful. I smile and just watch him. "Let's not keep you separated any longer babe. Does your van have a name?"
I look at him shocked. "Of course, Big Bertha." He laughs again giving me that beautiful smile. He walks me out toward the front door so I can grab my purse then out the garage door. I'm shocked he lets me drive. Waiting for me to buckle in he closes the door and walks right out the garage door. I look back and see he's moving his motorcycle in the other bay. He gets in and buckles up. I smile, he's moved in. "We'll need another spot for Bertha when she comes back from the shop." I tell him, he laughs again. I just smile.
"I'll talk to Chris about adding a garage, with a breezeway. We can put Bertha and my bikes in there." He says it as if it's no big deal.
I shrug, ok, no big deal. "Does your truck have a name?" I ask.
"Yeah, mine." He smiles. "No, I don't name my vehicles. They're just Cloud's bike or truck. The choppers have names but the Baxter's named them using their call letters. The team shortened it to Chomper and Dancer."
I smile. "What's your name?"
"I don't have a different handle I'm just Blackhawk. I lucked out. Jamie and Kevin are Thing One and Thing Two, Max is Nord, Jake is MD, they all have handles, I'm just my name." I look over and see he's smiling. His name is Cloud Blackhawk. Cool friggin name. "Steve was the same; his name was always Knight, no handle."
"Who needs a handle when you have cool names like that?" I tell him as I pull into the Security lot. I don't see the suv. "Where is your truck?" He points to a black pickup with a crew cab and short bed. Holy shit it's all man if I ever saw a man’s truck. "Really, what happened to the suv?"
"That's the Baxter's, I borrowed it so we'd all fit. I need to check on a few things. I'll meet you at the house when I'm done. Do you want to go out for dinner?"
I smile at that. "I really want to cook in my new kitchen. All I've made so far is coffee."
He laughs and walks around to my door. He unbuckles me and turns me toward him kissing me until my whole friggin body is tingling. He steps back smiling. Friggin guys. "Friday is a barn fire night. I'd like to take you and the kids to meet the Baxter's. There's a drive in at the Family Center for the kids, they'll love it. You'll love it." I nod because my whole friggin body is tingling. He closes my door and turns to his truck. Holy shit! I deep breathe and start the van. Friggin guy. I smile all the way to the grocery store. With all the food we have I feel a little funny walking in but I didn't take anything out for dinner. It just dawns on me Cloud never got his lunch. I guess he’ll pick something up.
Stuffing the meat in the fridge I go to my office and deal with hiring an assistant. I print out the CORY’s Keith sent over and send them to my DSS handler as possible visitors to the houses and Brenda as an assistant. She’ll be happy with them already being done. Opening an email from the Baxter’s I’m surprised to see CORY’s for Cloud, Jamie, Kevin, Ben, Mitch, Aleena and Chase. I send them too with a smile. They’re taking care of things before I even think of them. I call Brenda and leave a message about the job opening.
I call Cindy and tell her about the MC doing work on the house. “Mr. LaPonte already called. He said we’ll be moving into one of their shelter houses for a week while they work here. They worked it out for food and activities to be covered while we are away from home. The girls are excited about the shopping trip they have planned.”
I laugh shaking my head. “That’s good. Those guys think of everything.”
“I think Kate LaPonte-James is in charge of the activities. She’ll be calling and sending an itinerary for us. I’m excited myself.” She’s smiling. I can hear it.
“Me too. Let me know if you need help or a break.” I tell her hanging up. She’s not going to call me.
The doorbell rings I open the door to Ms. LePage, Brantley’s caseworker. She’s always smiling. I invite her in telling Brantley isn’t home from school yet. “I’m just doing the three month check. The house looks great.” She says looking around.
“Thank you it was just finished. I think they finished the back yesterday; it’s been so busy I didn’t have a chance to look. Come on back we’ll look together.” I walk through the house to the back door.
“Wow, this is great CJ. I bet the kids love it.” She’s all smiles. I’m amazed at what they’ve done. It is great. The platform for Joey looks like a gazebo with gauzy material gently blowing in the wind. It’s beautiful. “The lower one has a ramp.” She walks over to it. “Joey must love it. Look at that, a hammock chair, I love those!”
I laugh, too friggin much. She checks out the rest and we go back into the house just as the bus pulls up. The boys come running, Brantley stops when he sees his caseworker. “Just a regular check.” I tell him, he smiles at her.
“I wouldn’t want to leave here either Brantley. We haven’t heard anything from your mom but I need to talk to you with CJ.” She looks from him to me.
I look at Joey. “Why don’t you get the snacks ready for when the kids get home?”
“Come on Taylor let’s hunt down snacks.” She says rolling into the kitchen.
I pull Brantley into the dining room and we all sit. He holds my hand under the table. “It will be fine.” I tell him softly.
“We’ve lost contact with your mother again. It’s been a year since we heard from her. We can petition the courts to terminate her rights. At this point it’s considered abandonment. With all the budget cuts, I’m getting pressure to follow through with all the cases that can be resolved through the court system. You can go on the state adoption website and find a family Brantley.”
He jumps up not letting her finish. “NO! I have a family right here. You can leave me right here!”
Cloud walks in as Brantley is yelling at her. Shit. “Brantley, lower your voice and sit.” He says in a normal voice. Brantley sits and puts his head in his hands. Cloud sits on the side of him and puts his hand on his back. “What caused you to yell at a woman like that buddy?”
“She wants to put me up for adoption on the stupid website.” He says, he’s crying.
“It won’t happen Brantley. Don’t get so upset about could be’s scout. We won’t let that happen.” He looks at me. I smile. He’s friggin awesome. “You belong to us. I won’t let anyone take that away from you.”
Brantley looks at him then me. I nod. He laughs hugging me. He looks at his caseworker wiping his face. “I’m sorry I yelled at you. I don’t want to leave my family.”
Ms. LePage nods with shock on her face. Brantley runs into the kitchen. Cloud stands up. “I’m Cloud Blackhawk.” He puts his hand out and she shakes it still looking shocked. I’m smiling the whole time. Cloud sits beside me; he leans over kissing my head. Friggin guy.
“It’s nice to meet you; I'm Brantley's caseworker Ms. LePage. So you’re willing to adopt him CJ?” She’s looking from him to me like we’re a tennis match.
Cloud pulls his wallet and slides a card to her. “No WE are adopting him. It’s not a question, it’s a decision. If you send the information to the email on the card they will handle whatever needs to be done.”
She looks
at the card then at him shocked again. I hold in my smile. “This is Mitch Baxter’s card.”
“You’ll reach the company actually. I work for Baxter Security. They already said they will handle whatever I need. Mitch’s lawyer will take care of the court paperwork. Jamie says it will go faster that way. I talked to him right before I got here. Ben James from the MC also has help available if I need it.”
She nods with her mouth open. I laugh, I can’t help it. “I’ll get the paperwork started and over to Baxter's by the end of the week. The MC guys are a little overwhelming.”
If she only knew, I nod with her. I can't figure out why him making the decision for us to adopt Brantley isn't causing me to run in the other friggin direction. I just met the friggin guy; he lives in my house, is making lifelong commitment decisions about my kids and is adding on a damn garage. What the fuck is up with that? I smile glad Christian isn't home to catch my swear. Ms. LePage stands so we do, "Congratulations CJ. I'll just say goodbye to Brantley and let myself out." I nod still smiling at her.
Cloud looks down at me. "Sorry to spring that so quick. I just finished talking to Jamie in the event that we need help with something like this. I told him and Ben I'm all in with you. So you have Club and the Baxter's protection." He's looking a little nervous.
"What does 'all in' mean exactly." I ask hoping it's what I think.
"Just like it sounds. I jumped all in giving you a commitment that I'm here to stay. We have a lot to talk about and now isn't the time for that but I mean everything from living together, marriage and babies. All in forever."
"Holy shit! This is moving really fast and I should be running. Why the hell am I still standing here?" I say to myself then realize I said it out loud.
He friggin laughs and kisses me lighting my damn body up again. "I love you CJ, I'm not taking any chances of you running away. You feel it too. Those three small words that have the power to change our lives forever. I see it and feel it, just like you."
Friggin guy! "I love you too Cloud, I'm not afraid to say it but I'm afraid it's a dream. It's hard to believe."