by L. Ann Marie
He comes back in with Kate. I hold my shirt wondering what the heck we're doing. "Holy shit!" She whispers.
I look down, not sure what's going on. "What's wrong?"
Cloud smiles. "Not a fuckin thing. You don't need the bandages anymore."
I get up and go to the mirror. What the fuck? My skin is red the scar obvious but healed. The skin is closed. "He did it. Jeremy healed me." I touch the scar. Pulling my shirt away I look at the scar on my chest. It's healed. I feel tears falling and look at Kate. "He did this for me."
She's has her own tears. She laughs, "He did. He's incredible."
Cloud puts his fingers on the scar. "Fuckin kids." He says softly.
Kate laughs. "I need to tell Ben and Danny." She walks out leaving us to my not bleeding body.
"Do you want a shower baby?" He's still talking softly.
"No. I'm ready to take a nap though. I wish I weren't so tired."
He bends and kisses me. "Let's get you in bed and you can rest. I want to give that kid anything he wants. He healed you." He says lifting me and carrying me to the bed. He sits me down and pulls a t shirt on me. Laying me down he pulls my skirt off and leans in to kiss me. "I love you CJ. Tomorrow you'll be mine."
I smile and turn to my side. "I always have been." I feel him kiss my head.
Chapter Twelve
Cloud
This house is crazy with the kids and all the adults here. Tiny and Danny help me get breakfast done. The kids all help each other getting dressed. Jeremy is back to normal just like Danny said. I brought him to CJ so he could see her healed scars. He just hugged her smiling. Fuckin kids. They're mine. I smile.
Ben comes down and tells the kids he's ready. Ally runs to the room looking for CJ and Kate. Jess comes running in with flowers; she puts a ring of them on Joey’s hair. She's so happy and laughing I lift her out of her chair and bring her to the mirror. "My beautiful girl is decorated in beautiful flowers." She hugs me. So fuckin cute.
We get everyone outside and Tess comes running with a baby in her arms. "Wait for me!" She's yelling. We all just laugh. Patches and Rich walk up doing the man hug with me. Rich has his boy and looks proud. Kelly floating around taking pictures, she gets a good one of Tess and Blaze.
When I think we're set Steve, Little Ben and Nancy come out. They're making a line to the gazebo. Doc and Sally walk in with Geek, Bob and Digs. Fuckin Brothers make me smile. Aleena, Chase and Jake follow with huge smiles.
Finally Kate comes out with Jess, Danny and CJ are right behind them. Holy fuck! She's glowing, absolutely fuckin beautiful. Ben puts his hand on my shoulder. "Breathe Brother." I smile and breathe. Danny walks her to me and the kids stand behind us. Ben marries us and I kiss my beautiful wife. The kids laugh reminding me that I can't pull the dress off her. I lift my head to see her smile. Ben introduces Mrs. CJ Blackhawk. Everyone cheers and moves closer. I can do nothing but smile.
Every fuckin Brother slaps my back and kisses CJ. Fuckin Tiny is so happy and excited he almost knocks me over slapping my back. Not the hand print I wanted there but I laugh. Aleena hugs me with tears and a smile. Chase and Jake both hug me with congratulations.
Within half an hour they are all gone to work. The kids go to school, Christian goes home with Tess. Danny tells us he'll meet us at the house in a few minutes. I carry my wife through the door and right into the kitchen. Champagne is waiting. We have a glass and meet Danny at the door.
He comes into the kitchen. "The house is completely finished. I wanted to tell you what's going to happen today and tomorrow so you don't have heart attacks. The fuckin Brothers are crazy. Today the kids are scheduled for something every fuckin minute. Then they have Little Brothers. After that they'll be at my house. Tomorrow starting at noon people will start arriving for a party. Because of the security risk that will happen right here on our road. Ben, Kate, Jess and Mitch are planning it so it's going to be big and ridiculously extravagant. The kids will be staying at my house again. As we talked about last night, the kids will have Security on them. They won't be anywhere without a shadow. Ben will tell everyone about the adoptions during the party. You're not expected to stay through the whole thing, do whatever works for you. Since Mitch and Jess will be here, Baxter Security will be as well. You'll be safe, the kids will be safe." He stops and waits.
Holy fuck! "That’s a lot to take in Brother. Thank you for the heads up." I look at CJ, she's shocked.
"You don't even know me; you're all a little crazy you know that don't you?" She says making me laugh.
Danny is doubled over, when he stands he's still laughing, "You don't know the half of it CJ. The fuckin Club has been crazy for years now. I think the Baxter's are starting to do crazy right along with us. Just relax and enjoy yourself for the next couple of days. We know you CJ. The same way the kids do. You're special like the rest of the old ladies." He bends and kisses her cheek. "Have fun with this." He man hugs me and leaves.
"They really are a little crazy." She says like I need convincing.
I laugh and carry her to bed pulling her pretty dress off. "Tell me you're feeling good enough for me make love to my beautiful wife."
She drops to her knees and unbuckles my belt. Fuck she's feeling good. "I'm feeling fine, I wonder how you're feeling." She pulls my pants to my thighs and checks how fuckin good I'm feeling. Taking her mouth off me she smiles looking up, "you’re feeling fine but you could feel better.
I groan. Fuck she's going to tease the fuck out of me. I smile because I fuckin love it. Her mouth goes back to work, my hands make their way into her hair and I move for her. She's moaning with me, I love to hear her enjoy making me feel good. My fuckin wife. "Fuck baby, your mouth is so fuckin good." She pulls my ass closer and swallows me down causing me to moan out a fuck. Holy fuck that's good. When her hand cups and strokes my balls I lose it. "Fuckin Hell!" She moans with me. Fuck I'm having trouble standing. I pull out and lift her onto the bed.
Catching my breath I kiss up her body. She's moving her hips and whimpering. "My beautiful fuckin wife. I love you.” I kiss her mouth; she slips her tongue in my mouth getting my dick bobbing. Fuckin CJ, I don't know how she does it but she does it so fuckin good.
I move down her kissing and sucking her tit. She holds my head on her tight; I chuckle with a mouth full of nipple. Sucking hard I release it and go for the other one. Her hips come off the bed and against me looking for release. I smile and take my time loving every fuckin inch of her. When my mouth lands on her pussy she cries out 'yes' making me smile. I barely have my tongue on her and she's off screaming. Holy fuck my dick swells ready for more. I kneel between her legs and lift her onto me. Her face is almost at mine. I watch her eyes while I slide her up and down my dick. Fuck she's beautiful. She's breathing heavy, when she moans her eyelids drop, so fuckin sexy. "My beautiful wife, I love you." I blink the burning from my eyes and watch her. She kisses me saying all the things I need to hear through her kiss. Fuck. I lift my head and she moves with me. I move her faster, "everything, always for you CJ." I'm slamming her down on me but her eyes never leave mine. I take her in the wind with me and it feels unfuckinbelievable. I come and hold on to her while her pussy is still tightening around my dick. I'm floating in the wind with my wife's heart beating against mine. So right. I feel it in my soul, so fuckin right.
CJ
Holy shit! That was beautiful, is beautiful. I feel like I'm still floating on air with his arms wrapped around me. I don't ever want to move. I hold on and relax into him. I hear a phone and open my eyes.
Cloud lays me down and reaches for his pants. "Yeah Brother." He laughs, "thanks." He hangs up smiling. "Steve says I jump to the wind too easy and it's been an hour."
"Oh my friggin word! It's been an hour? How the heck does he know?" I'm so friggin embarrassed and surprised, it's been an hour and we didn't move.
He kisses me, "I have no fuckin clue how he knows and I'm never asking him. According to my phone it's been an hour. I love you my wife. Mak
ing love is as much spiritual as it is to satisfy our bodies. I was always told that, but I feel it every fuckin time with you. The spirits connect us in ways the physical world can't, it's beautiful and only ours."
"Wow when you say it like that I'm not embarrassed that Steve knows." I lift his head and kiss him. "I'm hungry."
He laughs and sits me up. "Then I'll feed you. I hope you like me taking care of you because all I want to do is make everything perfect in your world."
Oh my God! "Kate and Jess said that's exactly what the guys do. They used the same exact words." I wonder if they practice saying shit like that, it feels so friggin good.
"It must be meant to be. Come on I want to feed my wife." He pulls me out of bed and dresses me in a shirt and shorts that are new. I wonder where they came from but don't ask because he has a beautiful smile on his face. He's happy. I'm not changing that look just for an answer.
Chapter Thirteen
CJ
We spend the morning talking, we hear the noise outside but ignore it. At one we walk out the door. "They are absolutely batshit crazy." Cloud barks out a laugh. There is a friggin carnival going on with bouncy houses, food and drink stations, music and even tepees. I see Indians in full regalia moving through the crowd.
We walk to the street and the boys come running with big smiles. They all hug us and kiss my cheek. Jeremy is smiling so pretty I give him an extra squeeze. "Where's Joey?" They point to the teepees. I see her on a regular chair smiling at us. She's in Indian regalia and Nunánuk is braiding her hair. The kids walk with us over to her. Nunánuk finishes and comes to kiss my cheeks and hug Cloud. She goes back to Joey, Jeremy is holding her hand. They pull her up and she friggin stands. I can't hold the sob back but hold my hand to my mouth. "My baby can stand Cloud." Mitch stands behind her putting hand crutches in front of her. Joey holds them and moves her leg then the crutch. She's fuckin walking. I don't move tears are falling unchecked. I'm squeezing Clouds hand so hard, I'm surprised he's not screaming. She's walking! She makes it to me and I throw my arms around her. The crutches fall but I'm holding her standing up. She's breathing heavy but she did it. "You walked to me. I'm so damn proud of you Joey. You walked to me."
She laughs. "I needed a new look. I like the view from up here."
Cloud crushes us both, he's laughing. "Fuckin kids."
Mitch comes over. "I don't know what changed in her but the braces should help her get around without taxing her system. I expected that she'd have a long road of therapy ahead of her but now I think she just needs to get used to moving her legs. I'm so happy for all of you. Congratulations Blackhawks!" She's bouncing and clapping her hand and robotic together. She's so friggin cute I hug her saying a tearful thank you. Joey yells thanks too. Too cute. Cloud gets her crutches and hands them to her.
I look at Jeremy. He turns to look at me and smiles like an angel. I bend and hug him saying thank you. Christian comes to me. "He fixed what he could. Steve said it’s what can be fixed."
I hold Jeremy's face in my hands. "It's more than enough. She's walking Jeremy. You did that. Thank you my littlest son."
He jumps on me causing me to fall on my butt. I hold on to him. "Mommy." Fuck.
I cry holding him tight. "Yes baby always." A box of tissues appears in front of me. I grab one and look up. Aleena is smiling with her own tears. "He talked." She nods.
Cloud sits with us pulling us to his lap. "He just needed a reason. My son is wise." I look at him, tears are on his cheeks and he’s smiling. He hugs us both. "Just needed a reason baby." The kids hug us however they can. Everyone is laughing. "Let's do this standing so Joey can hug us too." He stands with everyone holding on laughing. Setting me down, he holds Joey and we hug again. Then everyone is hugging us. Batshit crazy feels really fuckin good. Christian cracks up. I slap his arm. Fuckin kids.
Nunánuk comes to us hugging us then she says something to Cloud not in English. He answers her shocking me. “Náy, yes. Wikun pumôtamuwôk, Life is good.” He’s smiling wiping his face. Aleena gives him a tissue making me laugh. Where does she get all the friggin boxes of tissues?
Nunánuk smiles at us. “Let’s dance! Mutákôtuk!” The Indians cheer. A group is sitting in a circle around a big drum. They all have stick things and watch Nunánuk. She says something to Cloud. He answers and smiles down at me. He kisses me and goes to a tepee.
Aleena moves closer to me. “They will do the w’sintamuwôkansh, wedding Mutáhká, dance for you with the yáhsháwôkansh spirit of his awáhsh, hawk.” I nod like I got all that. Christian laughs.
Nunánuk moves a chair and gestures for the others to move chairs. She walks on the side of Joey and helps her sit. I can’t get past she’s walking. I bend and kiss Jeremy again he pulls me to a seat and sits on the side of me. Jacob stands behind him with Brantley and Taylor on the side of him. Christian sits on the side of Joey holding her hand. I love my kids. The drum sounds and people migrate over. There is a big circle of people waiting. Cloud comes out of a tepee looking like a warrior. A real friggin Indian warrior with paint on his face and hardly any clothes on. He looks extremely virile, all male and I can’t take my eyes off of him. He has some kind of breast plate and his bottom half is covered to the knees. His moccasin boots are decorated with beads and feathers. He has leather arm bands and a headdress of feathers. Not a full one like you see on tv but feathers on his head. Everything he’s wearing is beaded and looks like real bone. He’s absolutely beautiful. A group of men in similar outfits stands with him in the center of the circle. He says something to me smiling. “Yo mutah mutu nutah, wipi kutah.”
Nunánuk translates for me, “This heart is not mine, but yours.” How friggin beautiful, I blow him a kiss. The drum beat changes and a high pitched war cry goes up. The men are stand looking up at the sky then they start to move. It is primal and riveting Jeremy squeezes my hand, it’s beautiful. Nunánuk explains it to me; since Cloud’s guide is a hawk this dance is his guide introducing me to the spirits as Cloud’s wife. I’ve never seen anything more profound in my life. He does all the steps the other men do as if they practiced it every day. The drum beat changes and the men dance faster. Nunánuk explains talking loud so others can hear her. “The drum calls on the spirits of the ancestors, Popowutáhuk huyáw yáhsháwôkansh wuci ocátôkának.”
I look at the crowd they’re feeling it too. I look back at my beautiful husband; he looks like he’s somewhere else, in a different time. I see no one but him until he stills right in front of me. “Kuwômôyush, I love you. My guide tells of our love. The spirits bless us with a long story.” I jump up and kiss him. People start clapping. I don’t care, I don’t let him go.
He lifts his head when we hear Nunánuk say, “She loves him, Wômôyáw.” People start laughing. Cloud too. Nunánuk asks if he’ll do another dance. He agrees but says after that he needs a shower; she nods with a big smile. She stands and speaks to the crowd. “This is my family, Nucáhsháyuwôk ayuw yo. These are my children, Nunicônak ayuwak yok. This is my daughter-in-law, N’shum ayuw yo, and my Warrior, Waskitôp. Listen to your heart, Kihtamoq kutáh! Live in peace, Pumôtamsh wuyohtiyôkanuk.”
Aleena joins in with other Indian women, they are all so beautiful. Their shawls are beautifully beaded in so many colors. They all have aqua and navy in them, I wonder if tribes have specific colors like a baseball team. We watch a different dance, the shawls fly as they turn, the men dance around the women. They’re happy; it looks like they are making the women happy. I watch Cloud smile through the whole dance. He jumps and spins in front of Aleena making her laugh. When they finish he kisses her cheek. Everyone claps so loud. I whistle and hear the bikers whistle and holler at the dancers. Cloud comes to me all sweaty. I pull his breast plate and kiss him then I whisper, “I like the sweaty look.”
He pulls me to his tepee to laughing and whistles. He wipes off while I look around. There are drawings on the walls I walk closer looking at everything. “This is mine. She brought it for me to remem
ber my heritage. I made it when I was a boy. My elders helped me since I didn’t have a father, they made it bigger so I didn’t feel slighted. I only remember how proud I was that they all helped me. Over the years, during Pow-wows this is where I slept and changed for the dances.” I look at him, my husband with a culture I know nothing about. I know he’ll bring this to me and our kids and feel nothing but proud. When I tell him he comes to me and lays me down on a blanket. “Who I am brought us together. I am proud to share that with you and my new family. I am proud of each one of you for who you are. I’m glad you’re proud of me too. It’s the start of our story.” He shows me how much he loves me.
Leaving the tepee after however long we were appreciating each other, not one single person says a word. I love it and feel like I see making love different since I met him. I would be embarrassed but it's just part of life here. My ex always made me feel dirty. Why the hell am I thinking of him when I have Cloud? I shake my head and jump back into now.
We talk with some of the Indians; they name me some word that means hair of fire. I laugh thinking it works for me. Cloud is respected by these men even the older ones show him that. I’m so proud of him. We make our way to some food and sit with Brantley and Taylor. Pretty soon all the kids find us. We’re laughing and talking when we hear Ben on a mic somewhere. He calls for us to come to the center of the road. We walk slowly with Joey. I can’t believe she’s friggin walking. When we make it there I notice everyone is here. The girls from the City house are standing together. I nod to Cindy with a smile. Ben gives a speech about serving our community and taking care of what’s important and how I do that. I cry. Friggin Aleena and her tissues appear. He keeps going making us laugh about the real life warrior watching over us with our precious treasures; the kids. Then he tells everyone that the adoptions became final yesterday. He calls each kid up using their new last name. They’re all crying and laughing. It’s so friggin special. He bends down to Jeremy and puts the mic to his mouth. “Mommy and Daddy Blackhawk.” The whole crowd goes still; he spoke again! Ben calls us up saying we are so stunned that Jeremy can indeed talk. Everyone laughs looking at him. I hug him; Cloud picks him up thanking him. Ben introduces the whole Blackhawk family. Everyone claps. He tells us there is an suv in the garage and the old van was donated to the Senior Center. I laugh and cry hugging my kids. They’re so excited.