by Lee Heaven
“What?” I snapped as I answered it.
“Come on baby. I love you. I miss you. Come back home.”
“Nicht! This is my home. This is where I belong. I have a job and friends. I’m not going anywhere. Plus, why the fuck would I go back to you after what I walked in on? You broke my heart Landon. I’m not going back to Vegas.”
He sighed heavily. “Schatz, please forgive me. I made a terrible mistake. I had a moment of weakness. I’ve been looking for you for six months. Please come back to me. If you don’t want to go to Vegas, then I’ll stay here. Please Maggie, I’m miserable without you.”
A tear ran down my face and I wiped it away faster then I needed to. “Landon, don’t call me your sweetheart, in any language. Go back to Vegas and leave me alone. I don’t care how much you think it was a mistake. What I caught you doing is unforgivable. You were with three other girls and then told me I wasn’t slutty enough for you. Fuck that!”
I could not cave to Landon. My heart was so broken by the sight of him screwing three other girls; it was still etched so freshly in my mind. I cannot allow myself to be hurt by him again. I will not sit around a feel sorry about myself over him for a month when he hurts me again, and he will hurt me again.
“Maggie…” He started to speak but stopped suddenly as if he was searching for the correct words.
“Landon, I will not do this with you. We are over. Go back to Vegas and leave me alone. Please. Einfach nach hause gehen sie bitte. Please I beg you to just go home and leave me alone.”
I couldn’t help it at that point and started to cry.
“Maggie please don’t cry. I don’t want to be the reason you cry,” Landon whispered into the phone.
Taking in a deep shaky breath, “If you don’t want to be the reason I cry then please leave me alone. Go back to Vegas and leave me alone. I’m hanging up now Landon. Please just leave me alone. Adieu.”
I hung up the phone and sank to the floor. How could he? How does he have the gull to call and act like what he did was nothing?
Then there’s Jacob, another one who broke my heart and is trying to act like nothing happened. I need to change my name and leave. I need away from all this.
I’m just about done packing my parents house. I only have my room, the attic and basement left. There are two piles going in the garage. One for donation and one to put into storage, the donation pile is three times the size of the keep pile.
Walking into the basement was as breath stealing as when I walked into my parent’s closet. There were boxes and boxes of all my school work, art projects, report cards and little things I would bring home to my mom. Everything there, as if to show my dad for the day he walked in the door. Boxes and boxes from the day he died until the day I graduated. There was even a small box of things from college that I sent to my mom.
Boxes of Christmas ornaments, Easter decorations, Halloween decorations; all stuff I had no idea we had. After dad passed mom never wanted to celebrate anything and we usually went over to my grandmothers, after my mom spent half the day crying or complaining.
I don’t know what to do with any of this stuff. I don’t know if I should keep it or just throw it away. Why do I want memories of a shitty childhood?
I pick up my cell phone and press send.
I hear her giggle as she picks up the phone and it makes me smile.
“Hey Maggie, feeling any better?” Sarah asks.
“Not really, but hearing you laughing makes it a little better. What’s so funny?” Almost about to giggle myself for some unknown reason, it was like it was contagious.
Sarah didn’t laugh much. In fact she didn’t even smile much. But when she was with Decker she was different. He could make her smile. He could make her laugh. I knew he would be good for her. He would give her whatever she needed to heal and be whole again.
“Decker just got his cast off. The faces he’s making while moving his leg is like he’s having multiple orgasms on the table,” she laughed.
I hear Decker laughing in the background “You hear that mouth Maggie. Sarah has no filter on what she says, so crude all the time,” he yelled while laughing.
“Sarah you two are perfect for each other.” I laughed and then gasped realizing what I had just said, hoping she didn’t catch on.
“Oh Maggie, you are nuts. Is everything ok? Why are you calling?” She asked concerned.
I explained what I had found in the basement and told her I wasn’t sure what to do with it.
“Maggie it sounds like your mother was very proud of what you did growing up. She may not have shown it on the outside, but by keeping everything so she could show your father says otherwise. Maybe you should sort through the boxes. Take any of the generic ornaments and donate them, any which are family heirlooms or you made put in storage. As for your school work it’s really your decision if you want to keep it or throw it out. I keep all the kids art work and report cards but I don’t keep any of that other stuff. Maybe that’s something you would consider. Take all those boxes and just consolidate down to just a few.”
“Sarah I would be lost without you,” I smiled at her through the phone, even though she couldn’t see it.
“Do you want Decker and me to come help you? We’re almost done here. We could be there in an hour.”
“No you guys stay away. If I’m coming down with something the less time I spend with you guys the better.” There that was a good answer just to let her continue to think I still wasn’t feeling good.
“Ok. Pack a little and then rest. I’ll see you when you get to Decker’s tonight.”
“Bye, Sarah,” I hung up the phone.
Time to sort through these boxes and consolidate some of this stuff. Sarah had a great idea; just keep the stuff that really meant something to me or my family. Not like it really mattered anyways, it was all going into storage anyways probably would never see it again.
~~~
Sarah fell for me having the flu. It didn’t hurt the fact that Jen had called in the beginning of the week with the actual flu and that she wouldn’t make it for the weekend. Decker’s plan was starting to fall into place. Soon we hoped that Sarah would see how much he loved her and how much she loved him.
There were lots of complications standing in the way. She was so broken spiritually that I wasn’t sure if she would see it right away. On top of that she had let me in on a story one morning about how when she was a teenager she was attacked and had scars that had affected her self esteem even more. I wasn’t sure if it was actual physical scars or mental ones. All I hoped for was that when Decker found out the truth it didn’t affect how he felt.
It was now Saturday morning and I turned on the news as I made myself breakfast. As my eggs cooked on the stove I leaned against the counter drinking my coffee and watching the news. Then the story came on, pictures of Decker and Sarah out front of his building. There was an incident. Fuck!
“Fuck she had a panic attack!” I said aloud to no one grabbing my phone off the counter I hit send.
“She’s fine,” He said as soon as he picked up the phone.
“How could you let it happen? You know she’s fragile,” I yelled at Decker even though he just said she was fine.
He sighed loudly at me, “It was an accident. Someone pulled her from my grip and I couldn’t get back to her in time. She’s fine now. In fact I’m watching her dance around the kitchen at this moment,” he quietly laughed.
“She doesn’t know your there does she?” I laughed at him. I knew Sarah wouldn’t be dancing if he was there and she knew it. She was painfully shy about things like that. The abuse her boyfriend put her through made sure that any bit of will power and playfulness was erased.
She let her guard down around me sometimes when Decker was in a different room, but if he was around there would be no way she would be so carefree.
“Nope,” he laughed some more.
“I’ll let you go. Protect her,” I scalded at him.
�
��I will. See you tomorrow night.” He laughed even harder as the phone disconnected.
Well at least she’s having a good time despite whatever happened last night. I wonder if things will be different come Sunday. I wonder if she just won’t go home. I don’t know, so many thoughts running around in my head. All I could really think for sure was ‘Please don’t let her leave this weekend without realizing how they feel about each other.’
Chapter 3
It was just about five o’clock when my doorbell rang. I was almost through the basement. There were boxes piled in front of the steps and on the little landing of the steps, blocking my way plus probably a hundred garbage bags to step over. The bell rang again.
“Hold on I’m coming,” I yelled up the stairs hoping whoever was at the door heard me. I had made it up to the landing when I tripped on the corner of a box. “Shit,” I screamed as I went flying forward.
Just as I smacked my forehead on a step I saw a figure appear at the top of the steps. My vision blurred as I heard a deep voice say, “Crap Maggie.”
I have no idea how long I’ve been out for, all I know is that I woke up and I’m on the couch with a wash cloth over my forehead and my head ached. I felt like a Mac truck fucking ran me down and then backed the fuck over me again.
Movement from the kitchen made me sit up faster then I should have. My head started spinning and as my vision went blurry. I saw a shirtless man walking toward me. I dropped my head into my hands to keep from falling over.
After a few seconds I lifted my head to find Jon squatting on his legs in front of me. He was shirtless and I was completely awed by the sight of his muscles. My throat went dry and my head was now spinning for another reason.
He had a six pack of abs that was so defined I wanted to run my fingers through the lines that defined each one. His chest was hard with a slight spattering of blonde hair. His shoulders were broad and led to two arms that were thick like a tree trunk. His one arm had a full sleeve tattooed down to his wrist and the other arm was tattooed to the elbow. Oh god that is fucking sexy. He certainly didn’t look like he was thirty-eight, if I didn’t know any better I would have guessed he was my age.
His jaw flexed as I took in my fill. I would give my left arm at this moment to run my tongue along that jaw and feel the tickle of his five o’clock shadow that was forming. His blue eyes sparkled as I finally locked my eyes on his.
“Where’s your shirt?” I asked very hoarsely, my throat was very dry.
Where’s your shirt? How about, how’d you get in my house? Or, what are you doing here? No, all you can think about is that stomach and his shirt. Fuck! I want to touch his abs! No. Don’t touch.
A smile played across his face displaying a dimple on each cheek. “Your nose was bleeding I used it to clean it up, so I put it in your washer. I couldn’t find another shirt here and didn’t want to leave you to run home and get one.”
Ok so that explains why he was shirtless but not why he was here, in my house. “What are you doing here? How did you get in?”
“I brought a pizza. I wanted to check up on you after the other day with Jacob and that other guy. I wanted to make sure they weren’t bothering you again.” He brushed a few strands of my hair off my face and my heart rate picked up. “You left your front door unlocked. When I heard you yell, I thought you might be hurt or in danger so I came in. Glad I did.”
I needed something to drink. My head was still spinning, but at this point I didn’t know if it was because I knocked myself out or because Jon was so close, shirtless and I could smell his spicy cologne. I stood up and swayed on my shaky legs.
Jon reached out and wrapped his arm around my waist to steady me. My hands went up and moved on their own grasping his chest. The heat rolling off of him I thought was going to burn my skin. I looked up into his eye and I heard his breath catch.
Without even thinking I ran my thumb down his jaw line and across his bottom lip. His breath stuttered and his eyes glazed over. I was pushing to my tip toes and pressed my lips to his before I even knew what I was doing.
A low growl rumbled from his chest and vibrated through me as his lips pressed back. His free hand slid around and wrapped around my hair pulling me tighter to him.
When I was finally breathless I pulled away. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have kissed you.”
Jon hadn’t let go of me or even loosened his grip. He lightly placed a kiss between my eyebrows. “Sweet Maggie, if I didn’t want to kiss you, I wouldn’t have let you.”
Jon bent down and sealed his lips against mine again. My hands roamed down from his chest and start to trace the outlines of his abs. Again, a shutter ran through him as my fingers reached the waist band of his pants.
His lips left trailing marks down my neck and across my collar bone. His hands made their way down to the hem of my shirt. He pulled it up and over my head in one swift move, barely breaking contact with his lips.
My fingers quickly worked at the buttons of his pants as he removed my bra. His erection was sticking out the elastic of his boxers almost reaching his belly button. My fingers moved on their own and traced the outline of the head of his penis.
He hissed as I swiped at the pre-cum that leaked out. “Maggie…”
“Don’t stop, don’t let me think. Just do it,” I hummed as his lips found my nipple.
At the same time our fingers pushed each other’s pants to the floor into a pile. He lifted me and I wrapped my legs around his waist. He turned and took a couple of steps before pinning me against the wall.
I hissed as he entered me. My fingers dug into his shoulder as he slid deeper.
He pumped into me over and over. Filling me so deeply I could swear he was going through my cervix and entering my womb.
“I don’t have a condom on,” he grunted into my ear.
“Pill…I’m on…the pill,” I stuttered between his thrusts and the sensations that were taking over my body.
Jon picked up his pace and pounded into me hard over and over again.
“Cum with me,” he growled as his teeth sank into my shoulder and I moaned at the erotic sensation it sent straight to my clit.
Pound, pound, pound and I did what he said. He followed through after pounding me half a dozen times more.
Jon walked us over to the couch and slid out of me as he eased us to lie down.
As my breath steadied and my heart returned to a normal, I ran my fingertips up and down his arm. Every muscle from his shoulder to his wrist was finely outlined. I traced the Polynesian sleeve tattoo that ran down his whole arm. My fingers traced the top of his hand, over the thin platinum band and down to his finger tips. His nails were manicured, but looked as if they weren’t.
Wait a platinum band? A wedding band? Left hand! Fourth finger! He’s fucking married?
“You’re married?” I asked as my fingers stilled on his band.
Jon froze and his body went rigid.
I quickly shot to my feet and turned to glare at him, “You’re fucking married?”
Jon rose to his feet and reached for me. I backed up two steps so he couldn’t touch me.
“Come on Maggie it’s not that big of a deal.”
Not that big of deal! What the fuck was the matter with him? I just slept with a married man. I threw everything I normally held back out the window and fucked him and he’s fucking married! Oh god I’m the other woman!
“Not that big of a deal! You’re fucking married! Why didn’t you tell me?” I screamed.
“I’ve wanted to do what we just did since you were sixteen. Nothing would have stopped me. Not even my wife or if you had a husband. Come on Maggie you have to admit it was pretty fucking good what we just did.”
Fucking good or not it shouldn’t have happened. How did I not notice a ring before? How did I not know he was married? Mom never told me he got married? Have I ever seen his wife? Oh my god!
“Get out. Get out and don’t come back here again. Just leave me alone.”
> I took off up the stairs taking them two at a time. I could hear Jon right behind me. I was able to slam the door shut, just as I flipped the lock button I heard him rattle the handle.
I sank to the floor pulling the blanket off the bed and wrapping it around myself. Jon continued to rattle the door handle as I shrank into myself.
“Come on Maggie. Open the door.”
I refused to answer the door. I refused to answer him or talk to him. I just silently wept into my blanket. I could hear him pacing outside my room, he would jiggle the handle every now and then. I knew if he really wanted to he could shoulder the door and break it down, but he didn’t try to.
I could smell him on me. I could smell his cologne clinging to my skin. I could smell the sex we just had. I wanted to shower. I wanted to erase everything that reminded me of him.
I knew I should never have come back to this god forsaken town. This house was cursed and nothing good ever came from it.
I finally heard the front door close and I crawled over to the window to look out to make sure he was actually leaving. I watched as he crossed the street and up his yard. When he was at his front porch he turned and looked directly at my window as if he knew I was watching him.
His coat fell open and I could see his bare skin –crap his shirt was still in my washer- he adjusted his pants as if just the thought of me made him hard. Then he stepped into his house and closed the door.
I was on my feet and down the stairs in seconds, running around making sure all the doors and windows were locked. I did not want him coming over here again. Once I was sure the house was secured I was up the stairs and in the shower before the water even warmed.
I needed to remove the smell of him. It made me want him again and there was no way in hell I was going to go there again, no matter how bad I wanted it or how fucking hot it was. He was fucking married!
After I had washed for the tenth time I could finally smell my own soap and not him. I climbed from the shower and dressed. Starving I headed to the kitchen. There on the counter was the pizza box he had brought over. Opening it I saw the extra cheese pie, just like we used to eat growing up. I shoved the box in the fridge and grabbed the left over Chinese. No way in hell was I eating that pizza tonight.