But the most dramatic transformation had to be his hair. It was past his shoulders that morning—a big, wavy mess. Now the mess was cut back to a mop on just the top of his head, and it fell into his eyes until he pushed it off to the side. The rest was cut close to his scalp, and the effect was stunning. He could have been a runway model with his high cheekbones and pink lips. Jude opened his mouth to speak a few times, but he was too flabbergasted to make any sense.
“You dressed for going out, or do you need a moment?” Reese beamed. He clearly enjoyed making Jude speechless. With a frustrated groan, Jude stormed down the hallway toward the bathroom, ignoring the laughter from the living room. He set his things neatly in a corner of Reese’s bedroom and then relaxed. From the look of Reese’s wardrobe, which was strewn about the room, the confident Reese had been just as nervous—at least when he was getting dressed.
A quick shower and shave later, Jude was a bit more collected. Reese had set a game into play by daring him to go out that night, and Jude intended to come out on top… maybe even literally.
“You ready to go yet?” Reese said with a smile as Jude joined them in the living room. Kyla let her eyes travel up and down Jude, taking in his outfit in a way that assured him he’d done well. He wore a short-sleeved cream shirt with black pants—simple but flattering. And Reese’s gaze expressed his approval.
“Don’t worry about me. I don’t work tomorrow, so stay out as long as you like.”
Jude had known he was gay since middle school, but he never acted on it until after high school. Kyla didn’t seem surprised at all that he and Reese were going out.
Reese held open the door for Jude, and they walked toward Reese’s car.
“I may be letting you plan our date, but I’m driving.”
Jude stopped in his tracks. “Reese, what exactly are we doing?”
Reese turned to face him and stepped closer. He kept his hands to himself, which seemed like a challenge.
“We’re getting to know each other better? Blowing off some steam? I don’t know. I just want to be with you, and you’re so guarded while we’re here. I want to see if you’ll let down that wall.”
“And then what?” Jude asked. He wanted to know what Reese expected. As attracted as he was to Reese, he didn’t want to lose his job or be stuck in a sticky situation. “You don’t have to make me any promises or anything. It’s just, if this is just a need to get off, I’d rather you take care of that urge with someone else.”
Reese cursed under his breath and shoved his hands into his pockets. “This is exactly why I want to get to know you better—want you to get to know me better. I don’t just need to get off. I told you I want you, and I meant it. When two people enjoy each other’s company, they choose to spend time together. Up until now you haven’t had a choice but to spend time with me. I’ve been all up in your space. I wanted to see if you wanted to spend time with me.”
The vulnerable tone of Reese’s voice was at odds with the rest of him, but Jude could see hesitancy—and perhaps fear—in Reese’s posture.
“I wouldn’t have agreed to your crazy idea if I didn’t want to spend time with you. I’m just trying to decide how much meaning I should give tonight.”
Reese looked into Jude’s eyes and finally stepped forward. He held a hand to Jude’s jaw and lifted his chin. “Give it meaning. You might think I’m something I’m not, but I mean everything with you.” He bent closer to Jude, but lingered inches away and waited for Jude to close the gap.
THIS KISS was real. It had meaning. Reese made sure of it. He didn’t want Jude to think the night was about anything other than being close to him. Reese wanted to shut out the world—even his thoughts of his grandfather and his new musical—and just focus on the man in front of him who’d made him feel things he hadn’t felt, honestly, ever.
Their lips brushed lightly, like a kitten would tentatively touch a thing of wonder in front of it. But Jude’s moan spurred Reese on. He gripped Jude’s back with his hand, dragged him closer, and made their kiss more insistent. It wasn’t that “rip your clothes off and find a horizontal surface” kind of kiss, though. It was a meeting of two hearts that longed to share space.
When they finally came up for air, they were both smiling like kids with a secret. Reese hated to lose the feeling of Jude against him, but he wanted to take the next step.
“So… what did you plan for tonight, Mr. De La Torre?”
Jude exhaled and let go of all but Reese’s hand. “I was going to take you to a place I know. We can be… us. We can….”
He seemed unsure, which made Reese wonder if that place was somewhere folks went to get off, like he’d mentioned before.
“I’ll go anywhere with you. I’ll do anything. But I don’t want to share you, and I want it to be very clear that we’re there together. This isn’t just for tonight, Jude, if that’s what you were thinking. Not to me, it isn’t.”
Jude looked him over as he scrutinized his words. “I want to be alone with you, but if we’re around others, we’ll be less likely to make this about sex. Maybe.”
Reese laughed. “Yeah, maybe. Sometimes when I look at you, I think to myself that no matter what, I’m going to have you right there and then. But then I remember my manners.” He laughed again and rubbed his face with his hand. He was maybe even a little embarrassed.
“Well, let’s see how it goes with others around. Then, if we still want to be alone….”
Reese had an instant erection as the word alone passed Jude’s lips. Couldn’t they just go get naked?
“Fine,” Reese said. He cleared his throat. “Point me in the right direction.”
REESE HAD never been to Incognito before, and he thought the desert theme was a bit overdone. But once they were inside the bar, he didn’t notice their surroundings. Jude took his hand, led him through a pack of men around the bar, and said hello to a few as they passed. Reese stood almost a head taller than many of the men. He was in good shape, but almost certainly not as good as those men were.
Jude moved through the bar and into the next room like a man on a mission. There was a large dance floor and a DJ, and the music was Latin flavored and loud. The clientele was well-dressed and very into their dancing. Reese felt a little intimidated by the quality of talent in the room—everything from men dancing close to their partners to groups of men showing off some serious skills. Jude led them into the middle of the floor, and the dancers parted to make room for them and then swallowed them up.
Jude raised an eyebrow when he turned to face Reese.
“You ready to move, or are you just going to stand there and let me work?”
Reese laughed. He wasn’t a great dancer, but he’d never been one to pass up a turn on the floor. He stepped closer, placed his hands on Jude’s face, and dropped a lingering kiss on his lips. Then he found his beat and went with it. Jude’s eyelids grew heavy as he let the rhythm take over. Their movements were small in the beginning, but soon the magic of a dark room and heavy bass made them lose all inhibitions. They moved as one with their bodies pressed together and only separated long enough to watch each other with hungry eyes and lustful gazes.
Jude turned his back on Reese and pressed against him. Reese grabbed Jude and moved their hips together side-to-side, then in a circle. Jude brought his arm up around the back of Reese’s neck as they moved, and Reese wrapped his arms around Jude, running his tongue and teeth down Jude’s neck. Jude slid his hands around and gripped Reese’s ass tightly.
Reese groaned, and their dance went on, getting hotter and hotter until Reese truly forgot they weren’t alone. He turned Jude to face him and kissed him, and thrust his tongue in and out to let him know just how much he wanted him. Jude pulled back, breathless. He held a hand over his chest as though trying to control the frantic beating of his heart. Reese recognized the movements as they mimicked his own feelings. The music slowed enough that the couples around them began to sway together as though they were at a high school
dance. Jude came enthusiastically into his arms, pressed his cheek against Reese’s chest, and wrapped his arms around Reese’s lower back.
Reese felt as though he held a prize against him, and he never wanted to let go. He marveled that Jude, who seemed so serious and reserved, could show so much passion. And it was there for all to see. Reese had thought Jude would jump out of his skin if he touched him in front of anyone else. He was elated to experience a different side of Jude, and he never wanted it to end.
Why couldn’t they enjoy each other like this all the time? Grandpa would grumble, but he’d get over it. Reese found himself gloating and thinking that maybe he’d won—he’d found someone to share all the parts of his life, not just his career and everything that went along with it. With Jude as his plus-one, he’d have someone he treasured instead of a trophy. But reality came flooding back as his phone began to buzz in his pants.
Jude must have felt it too. He stepped back enough to allow Reese to bring the phone up and see that Kyla had texted.
I’m so sorry, Reese. He fell. I’ve called the ambulance, and they’ll be here soon. He’ll be okay.
Reese swallowed hard, and tears pricked his eyes as he turned the phone to show Jude. Jude nodded, grabbed his hand, and led him out of the small club. He held his hand out for the keys when they reached the Tesla, and Reese didn’t argue. He handed them to Jude and let Jude open the door for him and close it once Reese was settled. He let himself in the driver’s seat, adjusted it for his size, and turned on the car. Then he took hold of Reese’s hand, brought it to his lips, and kissed him gently.
“Everything will be okay,” he said quietly, although he looked resigned.
Reese was grateful to have the drive back to the house to collect himself. It could have been worse, but Reese felt horribly guilty. He watched Jude drive home and knew that, without him, he’d likely have freaked out, wrecked his car trying to get home in a hurry, and still been unprepared to deal with whatever he faced.
The emergency responders were at the house when they pulled up fifteen minutes later. Reese was out the door before Jude had the car turned off. He ran up the steps and into the living room in two strides. Thankfully he’d set up the room with enough space to allow for the gurney to be brought in. Grandpa was strapped on and getting oxygen.
“Old man, what happened?”
Grandpa pulled his oxygen mask down and cursed. “Goddamn, Reese. I can’t believe I fell. I thought I had a good footing, but my damn leg went right out from under me. They’re saying they think I may’a broken something, so they gotta take me in. Ain’t this a bitch?”
Reese bit his lip to keep from crying. “I’m sorry I wasn’t here, Grandpa.”
The old man waved off his apology. “Wouldn’t have mattered. Look. Bring me something to wear home, would ya?”
“Mr. Matheson, we need to take him now.”
Reese nodded to the EMT and followed the gurney outside. Jude stood with Kyla on the porch, speaking softly. His eyes were wary as Reese approached.
“I’m going to follow—”
“I’m coming with you,” Jude said without hesitation.
Chapter Seventeen
JUDE WATCHED Reese pace the length of the waiting room. His level of agitation was clearly through the roof. Jude had already brought Reese some herbal tea from the cafeteria to help calm him, but he was inconsolable. Just when Jude thought Reese would collapse, he finally sat next to Jude in the hard plastic chairs and dropped his head back against the wall.
“I wish they’d tell us something,” Reese said quietly, his voice full of emotion.
Jude took his hand in both of his. “He was lucid when we arrived. He wasn’t confused. He didn’t hit his head. Kyla said he didn’t seem to be in a lot of pain. He just complained his ass hurt, and he was worried he sprained his balls.”
Reese snorted and squeezed Jude’s hand. He gave Jude a lazy smile. “That old man and his balls. I swear, I think I’d rather get castrated than deal with what he does.”
Jude’s eyes flared, and he covered his mouth. “But Reese, don’t you….”
Should he even ask? Jude didn’t even know where he stood on the topic of parenthood.
“Don’t I what?”
“Mr. Matheson?”
Jude stood with Reese and followed as he approached the doctor.
“Your grandfather is resting. He has a hairline fracture of the femoral neck. It could have been much worse. He’ll need to stay here for a couple of days for monitoring. I’m confident we won’t need to do surgery. I understand your grandfather suffers from Alzheimer’s and has a history of stroke, but no other major physical ailments, which is a blessing. We’ll monitor to be sure no surgical intervention is necessary, and then we’ll transfer him to a rehab facility where he’ll stay until the bone heals. He’s very lucky. If this were his pelvis or if there had been a head injury, we’d be having a different conversation right now. You really need to get him to agree to a walker or something similar for support long-term. Do you have any questions?”
The doctor had thrown so much information at Reese that Jude was surprised he was still standing. He gave a little tug on Reese’s shirt when he remained quiet, and Reese glanced down at him, his eyes wide with horror. The color had bled from his face. Jude stepped in.
“Thank you, doctor. Can we see him tonight?”
The doctor looked at his watch. “They’ll be placing him in a room shortly. You can visit him until they get him settled, and then he needs rest. The social worker will be in touch.”
The doctor turned to leave, and Reese let out a whoosh of air.
“Please tell me that it’s not as bad as it sounds?”
Jude squeezed his arm reassuringly.
“He’s going to be okay as long as he follows directions, which we know will be difficult. But he’ll make it through this. We’ll take care of him. Okay?”
Reese looked despondent, so Jude wrapped his arms around him and held his trembling body. He’d faced so much loss, and much of it alone. Mr. Matheson had told Jude about Reese’s parents—that they’d died in an accident after Reese finished college—and then Mr. Matheson had lost his own wife. How awful to lose those around you when you were so young.
Jude had experienced death. His lolo on his mother’s side passed when he was just becoming a teen. The family rallied around his parents, and he remembered them celebrating his life. He’d been an important man—part of the agricultural movement in California alongside the famous Cesar Chavez. Many people were unaware of the Filipino contribution to the fight for farmworkers’ rights, but his family was very proud of their heritage.
Reese gave one more squeeze and then let go. “Will you come with me to see him?”
Jude smiled. “I’ll be wherever you need me to be. I’m here for you, Reese. I want you to know that. Not just as an employee. I love your grandfather.”
Reese smiled a vulnerable smile. “I know you do. I know, and he knows. I can’t thank you enough.”
He brushed his lips against Jude’s, apparently not caring that they had witnesses in the waiting room around them. Jude took his hand and led him to the nurse’s station.
“Can you please tell me where I can find Thomas Matheson?”
The nurse escorted them back to a curtained-off bed. Jude snorted when he could hear Mr. Matheson flirting with the nurses.
“I’m going to be in this bed a long time. You sure you don’t have time to—”
“Wherever you’re going with that statement is going to be all kinds of wrong,” Reese interrupted.
Mr. Matheson winked at the young Filipina nurse. She rolled her eyes and gave Jude a smile as she passed by. Mr. Matheson had his arms folded behind his head and lounged in what looked like a painkiller-induced euphoria.
“What am I going to do with you?” Reese asked as he bent down to press a kiss to his grandfather’s forehead.
“Well you better make sure they have cute nurses on whatever floo
r I end up on. And can you bring me some of that Gold Bond? My balls are already sweating, and I ain’t even in a room yet. Chafing is going to happen, you hear?”
“Lord, do I hear.” Reese laughed and wiped at his eyes. Jude thought he saw relief there and was grateful Mr. Matheson seemed to be alert. Sometimes you just didn’t know with him.
“The doctor said you’ll be here for a few days, and then they’ll—”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah. Rehab facility. Can you believe it? One lousy stumble, and I’m stuck in bed. You better bring that keyboard of yours over. We got work to do, son. I want that damn musical written so I can enjoy it before I finally kick the bucket.”
Jude saw Reese’s jaw clench at that statement.
“If they’ll let me, you bet I’ll bring it. We’ll work every day, just like we’ve been doing. Just because you broke your damn femoral neck, or whatever the hell that is, you aren’t off the hook, old man.”
They laughed together, and Reese hugged his grandfather once more. They were so close, yet it was a different kind of closeness than Jude had with his family. There was more formality between Jude and his father, uncles, and grandfather. The women were all about gossip and guilt trips, but the men expected your respect.
The social worker came in then, and boy did Mr. Matheson’s eyes light up. She introduced herself as Camilla Santiago, and she was an older Filipina, probably in her late fifties to early sixties. She had a dazzling smile and a beauty mark just above her lip.
“You look just like Marilyn,” Mr. Matheson said from the bed. She nodded to Reese and Jude and then held out her hand to shake. Mr. Matheson took it in his and leaned forward to place a kiss on the back of her hand.
“Mr. Matheson, you’re quite the charmer. I’m here to go over your admission.” She turned to Reese and began discussing his insurance information. Thankfully Reese had made sure his grandfather had the best coverage. He insisted on it when his grandfather signed over power of attorney to him after his stroke.
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