by Mary Smith
I opened my eyes seeing his blue eyes staring back at me.
“Mom texted me and they will be ready in about an hour for dinner. I figured you needed some time to get ready.”
“I look that bad.” I joked.
“Never.”
I rolled off the bed and headed into the bathroom not sure what my feelings were anymore.
Dinner was successful. Of course the overly flirtatious Mr. Edwards to his wife made me laugh as Thaddeus groaned and rolled his eyes a lot.
When we got back to the hotel room, I wasn’t as tired as Thaddeus. Then again, I did take a nap. While he was in the shower, I changed into my pajamas and went out on the patio. The moon was so bright reflecting off the waters it looked like a painting. The beach still had a lot of people on it admiring the same view as I was.
I love the feel of the breeze on my face and the smell of the salt in the air. It was something I couldn’t imagine when I thought of being near the ocean.
“Do you mind if I join you?” Thaddeus asked before coming out of the room.
“Sure,” I shrugged.
He leaned against the railing taking in the scenery.
“Thaddeus, thank you for helping me with the plane ride,” I told him softly.
He turned to me, looking down at me as I sat in the chair. “You’re welcome.”
“And I’m sorry. I accused you of something that wasn’t true and making your life pure chaos. I haven’t really accounted for your feelings or needs in this Matched, and I’m,” I paused staring deep into his eyes. “I’m very sorry.”
“Xaviera, it’s not that you’re in my life, it’s,” he knelt down in from of me, “the fact, I don’t know what I’m doing, and I don’t like that.” He told me honestly. “I don’t know how to take all that in.”
“Thaddeus.” I took his hands in mine. “To you I’m Xaviera to everyone else I’m the Princess. You don’t have to impress me, I’m yours already. We need to learn about each other. Equally.”
I told Thaddeus I was his, already?
Why did I say that?
My heart sped up because it was true. I was his, and no one else’s.
He nodded. “I’m going to bed. The meeting is early in the morning.” Thaddeus kissed my temple.
I was at a loss of what to do now. I stared out at the ocean in front of me feeling like the waves, unsure of where to go from that moment.
When I crawled into the bed I observed Thaddeus in the bed across from me.
“I can feel you staring,” he said with his eyes still closed. He only had a sheet on covering the lower half of his body. He was shirtless, but he was lying on his stomach. I wasn’t able to see anything.
“I’m sorry, Thaddeus, for everything. If you want to Push Back me, I’ll understand.” I heard the hurt in my voice.
He opened his eyes, popping up on his elbows. “What?”
“It’s okay. They’ll be no hard feelings. I swear.”
“Xaviera.”
I cut him off. “I’m tired, and I know that you are too. Good night, Thaddeus.”
I turned off the light, rolling my back to him, letting the tears fall.
~~~
When I woke up the next morning, Thaddeus was already gone. I laid in the hotel bed trying to figure out what was going to happen when we got back to Unit.
Amaya: Where are you?
She had texted me fifteen times last night, and I didn’t answer. I knew as my Protector she was going crazy.
Me: Calm down, I’m fine. I’m in Miami, with Thaddeus
Amaya: What?!
Me: Don’t get too excited, pretty sure I’m being Pushed Back
Amaya: What?!
Me: I’ll explain when I get home in a few days.
She didn’t text back, but I did get one from Mrs. Edwards saying she was coming to get me in an hour, and we were going shopping.
I took a deep breath and rolled out of the bed to start the day.
Mrs. Edwards and I spent the day at Lincoln Road Mall. I didn’t think I could laugh so much, but Mrs. Edwards was so funny. Our shopping really helped me to keep my mind off of everything that was going on between Thaddeus and me. Well, what wasn’t happening between us? She didn’t bring anything up, and I wasn’t going to volunteer any information. So, I focused on shopping.
I wanted to buy everything, but I didn’t have the budget for that. However, I did get a few items. Mrs. Edwards offered to buy me anything I wanted, but I couldn’t let her do that no matter how badly I wanted it.
I did get a nice dress and one pair of shoes. I was admiring them back at the room when Thaddeus sent me a text.
Thaddeus: Dinner, just you and me, should be at the hotel soon
I stared at my phone. He wanted to have dinner with only me.
Me: Fancy? Casual?
Thaddeus: Casual.
I changed into a yellow sundress and matching wedges. I was pinning my hair up when I heard Thaddeus come in the room.
When I came out of the bathroom, he was taking off his shirt. I assumed he was getting comfortable being shirtless around me. The problem was it caused me to almost drool all over the place.
“How did the meeting go?” I asked studying myself in the mirror trying not to stare at him. He didn’t answer me. “Thaddeus?” I turned to him. He was staring at me. His shirt opened and his tie hanging there. “Thaddeus?” I said firmer.
“Sorry.” He stared at me with his mouth hanging open.
“What is it?”
“You look beautiful.” He walked over to me.
“Thank you.” I looked back at the mirror making sure my hair was in place. My heart fluttered at his words. Before I was fine, and now he said I was beautiful. Maybe this night wouldn’t be too bad.
When he was ready, he took me to a small diner that served Cuban food. The atmosphere was electric, and the music was so contagious. Thaddeus went right into telling me about his meeting today. Apparently, the reason they had to meet in Miami was because their client was down here on vacation, but the building will be built in New Orleans. He’ll find out tomorrow if he got the lead on the project.
“So, you’ll have to go to New Orleans for how long?”
“I’ll be down there for a least three months to get everything in order, and then.” He shrugged. He wasn’t sure how long it’ll take for the buildings to be done.
“When would it start?”
Thaddeus had a sad face when he answered, “October.”
I looked back down at my food. October was the end of our Decision period, and then we would make up our minds to stay or leave Unit.
He asked about my day as he went back to eating.
“I went shopping with your mom and had a blast. I didn’t realize how funny she was, and how much she’s like my mom.”
Thaddeus gave me a small smirk. “She does have a funny bone, that’s for sure, just don’t get her mad. She’s way worse than Dad.”
“Like I said, just like my mom.” I giggled.
“So, where did you hide all the shoes?”
“What?”
“If you went shopping, where are all the shoe boxes?” he grinned at me.
“Oh, I only bought one pair.”
“Wait.” He looked shocked. “Did you say one? You only got one pair.”
I shrugged. “That’s all I saw.” I lied to him.
He gave me a strange look but didn’t call me out on it, only continued to finish his food.
When we were done Thaddeus had the idea of walking along the beach.
We walked on the beach, barefoot, letting the warm water splash against our feet. He hadn’t held my hand or tried to kiss me. I almost felt like it was like we were starting all over again.
“Let’s sit.” Thaddeus walked up the beach a little bit where there weren’t a lot of people. He laid his jacket down and motioned for me to sit on it.
“I don’t want to ruin it.”
“Please.” His blue eyes begged.
I nodded. I
dug my toes into the sand while looking at the reds, oranges, and yellows of the sunset. It was nothing like I had seen in pictures or the internet. It was breathtaking.
“Xaviera, I think we need to have a serious talk.”
I closed my eyes. I knew it was coming. Our dinner and the walk had been too perfect.
“You know, I’m not the most expressive person. In fact, I think I’ve talked more to you than I’ve talked to my own sisters. I’ve enjoyed our time together except for when you wanted to show off your powers. I’m very much aware of who you are, and what you are capable of trust me. But…”
Here it comes. The words no Unit girl wants to hear.
“If you promise to stop being so stubborn and remember this is a 50/50 relationship, then we could be amazing together.”
“What?” my heart stopped. “You’re not going to.” I could barely say the words at that moment.
"I've never had any intentions to have you Pushed Back." Thaddeus turned to me. “You may not believe this, but it’s the truth.” he took my hand in his and grazed my knuckles with his soft lip. “I’ve liked you for a very long time.”
My mouth dropped, and I couldn’t speak.
“I didn’t think you would believe me, but it’s true.”
“Why?” I wasn’t anything special. I was the Princess, but nothing else.
“You have a good heart. You care about Unit, and it doesn’t hurt that you’re gorgeous.” He flirted with me.
The shock was still pulsing through me because I didn’t understand. I thought I was going to be Pushed Back, and now he’s telling me that he likes me.
“I’m so confused.”
“By what?”
“I’m not Pushed Back, you like me, and now you’re saying it’s been that way for a long time.”
“Yep.” He looked back at the ocean and the sunset as I stared at his profile.
“I don’t know what to say.”
Thaddeus remained quiet for several seconds before asking me. “Do you like me, Xaviera?”
“Yes,” I said without thinking about it.
“Do you want to be Pushed Back?”
“No.”
“Our decision period isn’t over. So, let’s start fresh from this moment on.” He squeezed my hand.
I didn’t know what to say. I was a statue, and thankfully, I wasn’t causing any type of monsoon or tsunami. I do like Thaddeus, that wasn’t a lie. It was hard to fathom that he’s liked me for a long time. What did that really mean, anyway?
I concentrated on our linked hands. They fit perfectly together. I had never noticed that before.
“Fresh start?”
Thaddeus gave me a smile; the one that I only saw and no one else. “Yes.”
I nodded watching the sun fall from the horizon.
“Come on let’s get back to the hotel.” He stood up pulling me with him. Thaddeus shook out his jacket and hand-in-hand we walked back to the lobby.
We got back to the hotel and saw his parents in the lobby. They looked beyond gleeful. They both were glowing with joy. I wondered if I would be there, someday.
“Xaviera,” Thaddeus’s deep voice caused me to turn around when I walked through our room. He was right next to me, and I saw true desire in his eyes.
I couldn’t say a word before his lips were on mine. We both moaned at our contact. His tongue drove into my mouth. I held onto his neck, and he gripped my hips.
“I missed your lips.” Thaddeus breathed.
“I missed yours,” I said truthfully.
Chapter 12
Couldn’t Stop If I Tried
Thaddeus had his arms crossed and was staring me down. “Take it,” he growled.
“No, I don’t want your credit card. I have my own money.” I used the same tone he used.
“You bought one pair of shoes yesterday.” He pointed to the bags.
I shrugged. “I didn’t find any that I liked.” Actually, that statement was a lie. I had found a ton of shoes I loved. Nonetheless, I wasn’t going to take Thaddeus’ money.
“You’re very stubborn,” he mumbled slipping on his suit jacket.
“Oh, and you’re not?” I sat on the side of the bed still in my Snoopy pajamas.
“That’s not the point. Now, I’ve got to go, but here.” He hands me the card anyway. “Take it as an emergency backup. Please.”
“Fine,” I sighed. There was no point in continuing this argument. I knew that I wouldn’t use it, but I took it from his hand.
After Thaddeus left, I got ready and met Mrs. Edwards in the lobby. She wanted to go to more local shops today. She explained she liked to find more unique items.
Like the last time we shopped, I had so much fun and by lunch time my feet hurt. However, it was worth the pain because we found some amazing items.
Mrs. Edwards was on the phone with her husband as I browsed more racks of scarves when she rushed over to me.
“Well, we need to go have lunch.”
“Sure.” I smiled.
“We’re heading over to Jax and Thaddeus and their client,” she informed me while walking out of the store.
“Oh, we are?”
“Yep and don’t worry it’s a causal lunch.”
We hailed a cab and headed towards the other side of town. Mrs. Edwards told me not to be nervous, and I tried my best.
When we arrived, it was a small diner, nothing fancy. Mr. Edwards and Thaddeus were sitting at a large table in the corner. I let Mrs. Edwards take the lead as I controlled my breathing seeing the large Santa-like man.
Once we got settled at the table Mr. Edwards introduced us to Santa, who really was Mr. Martinez. He was the billionaire who, finally, agreed for Thaddeus to build two buildings for him in New Orleans. I was so proud of Thaddeus, and the fact he was fulfilling his dream.
When lunch was over the men went back to sign more papers, and Mrs. Edwards and I went back to the hotel.
Sitting on the bed, I looked over at all my purchases. How in the world was I going to get it back to Unit? The knock on the door brought me out of my plan to buy another suitcase before I left. When I opened the door, there was a hotel attendant on the other side holding a dress bag and what seemed to be a shoebox.
“Is Mr. Thaddeus Edwards here?”
“Not at this time. May I help you?”
“He had this delivered here.” He handed me the bag and I told him thank you.
The bag was too dark for me to see inside it, and I assumed it was a shirt because it was so light. I hung it up with his other clothes and set the box on his bed.
It was several hours after I saw him that Thaddeus walked through the door. He kissed me hard on the lips with a big smile on his face.
“I’m so happy right now.” His voice was filled with glee as he hugged me to his body.
“I’m so proud of you, Thaddeus. I mean it, you worked hard for this,” I said into his chest. We held the position for a few moments. We hadn’t hugged before and being this close to him was making my senses fuzzy. His chest was hard, and his arms felt like protective bars around me.
I felt safe.
“Sorry.” He stepped back. “I was excited to see you.”
“It’s fine.” My hand rested on his rib cage, and I wasn’t sure if it was his heart beating that fast or mine. “Oh, the hotel dropped something off for you. It’s in the closet.”
“Great.” He walked over to the closet, and I felt empty when he left my arms.
He laid the bag on the bed, staring at it without it being opened. I wasn’t sure what he was doing. “Thaddeus, everything okay?”
He looked up and walked over to me taking my hand. We sat on the side of his bed next to the bag.
“I want to ask you something. More like a favor, but if you don’t want to do it, you don’t have to.”
“Um, okay, what is it?” I was a little nervous on what this favor was.
He reached over and handed me the bag. “I would like you to wear this. I want y
ou to wear it as it is.”
I wasn’t sure what he meant, but when I unzipped the bag, I gasped. “Thaddeus?” Inside was the pink tutu dress that I tried on in New York. The one that was too short.
“Why?” I breathed the question out.
“Because I heard the disappointment in your voice at the shop. Here.” He hands me the shoe box, and I open it. Inside was a pair of Gucci pink high heels to match the dress. “I would like you to wear this for me. Tonight. No jacket, no tights, just you in this dress.”
My heart was beating so fast I thought it was going to jump out of my chest.
Could I do this?
I’d never worn anything like this before without being covered.
“Why?” I repeated.
He pushed his hand through his hair and took a deep breath. “I want to take Xaviera out on a date. I don’t want the Princess of Unit. I want us to be a real couple. I know that’s breaking the Rules, and I hate asking you, but I would like one night with you.” Thaddeus’ voice sounded sad, and I actually understood what he meant.
In Unit, I would always be the Princess and there were always the Rules. He was right. We were technically breaking them, but what would it be like to wear this dress?
What would it feel like with the breeze on my shoulders? Or not wearing any form of tights?
“What if your parents see me?”
“They won’t. Dad is taking Mom on some boat ride tonight, they’ll be gone till morning.”
I stared back at the dress and shoes.
Would I ever get a chance like this again?
Would I regret it later if I said no?
“How long do I have to get ready?” I asked with a dry mouth.
“About an hour,” he said. I nodded picking up the dress and shoes and went to the bathroom.
I used that whole time to get ready. I left my sandy-blonde hair down and in loose curls. My makeup was a little heavier than usual, but not too bad. I slipped into the dress and shoes. I studied myself in the bathroom’s full length mirror.
The dress has a sweetheart neck and is covered in delicate swirls of sequins through the bodice. At my hips, it flared out into a soft tutu of pinks and grays which stopped my mid-thigh.
My neck, arms, and legs were exposed. I had no jacket and no tights on; I was me, in my own skin.