Dare to Breathe

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Dare to Breathe Page 7

by Tina Maurine


  I felt a blush creeping up my neck before it pooled in my cheeks.

  “Rhea?”

  “Yeah?”

  “Earlier today you had said that you had closed off your heart and the space that you’d been saving for someone was now filled.”

  “Isaac, everything is so complicated right now…hell, I mean; here I am sitting in a damn air duct whispering to you. Everything hangs in the balance and it all depends on whether we make it out of here alive. Ya know?”

  “I hear what you’re saying but I guess I just look at it differently than you.”

  “Oh? How so?”

  “Well…you seem like your every next movements are taken with trepidation; that all of your pent-up anxiety and nervousness is keeping you from seizing the day.”

  “Oh yeah—Carpe Diem right?” I softly chuckled. “It’s really no laughing matter. Rhea, you are so

  paralyzed by fear and by our situation that you can’t find the optimism needed to take a step forward towards your future.”

  “You mean, like with you?” I rolled my neck from side to side, the tension Isaac’s line of questioning was generating made this whole exchange a little tedious for me. But, I had to give it to him, he was right on all counts. I didn’t want to commit to anything right now—what was the point?

  “Well, yes—like with me.” His concession fell hard into the deep silence that was filling the space between us. I heard him clear his throat, “Rhea?”

  “Yeah, Isaac?”

  “You mentioned Eli emailed you, and earlier you had said that you had met someone through the school’s email system…the person that you’ve met. The one who filled the vacancy in your heart—was it him?”

  I shrugged, although a lot of good it did me—it’s not like he could see me through the wall and a floor down. “I said I wasn’t closed off to a dinner with you. Getting to know you over Thai sounded like a great plan.” I sighed more heavily than I had meant to.

  “Rhea, I’m not trying to make you uncomfortable. I just didn’t want to miss this opportunity of getting to know you and telling you how I felt. I know that there will never be another person, hell another girl like you that could comprehend the life-altering experience that we’re going through.” He paused as though searching for the right words, “I just didn’t want any regrets is all…and it seems like lately all I’ve had are regrets.” I heard a soft thud against the vent as though he had rest his head against it.

  “Isaac—hell, I don’t even know how or where to start but I can try to talk it through with you…that is, if you’re willing to listen?”

  “Shh! Someone’s coming!” I heard him scramble away from the vent.

  SILENCE.

  Then a single, solitary, GUN SHOT.

  Chapter

  +2 Hours

  The gunshot stunned me. Was it for Isaac? Was it outside in the hallway? Was it even on his floor or mine? The location the shot came from wasn’t clear to me and the thought that it may have hit Isaac or Eli…or hell, anyone else threw me into a pit of sorrow. I sat holding my knees, rocking for I’m not sure how long—staring at the blinking blue light on my phone before it even registered that I had received a new email.

  Grabbing my phone I straightened up as I swiped the screen. 9:18. I tapped the email icon indicating I had three new emails and tapped on the first.

  SUBJECT: RANSOM NOTE TO:

  RheaVelvetKenzee@pacificlakescommunityc ollege.us.net

  FROM:

  EliValenSnohe@pacificlakescommunitycolle ge.us.net

  SO, YOU PLAN TO KIDNAP ME EHH? SOUNDS LIKE A PLAN I COULD GET BEHIND 110%. HAHA (…MMM, I LIKE THE IDEA OF GETTING BEHIND SOMETHING…EHH HEMM…SOMEONE ELSE 110% TOO).

  OKAY, OKAY…PULLING MY MIND OUT OF THE GUTTER, ALTHOUGH IT’S HARD SINCE THAT’S WHERE IT SEEMS TO GO ALMOST EVERYTIME I THINK OF YOU.

  …DON’T SAY ANTHING ABOUT HOW WEIRD THAT IS. I AM A GUY AFTER ALL.

  SO, IF YOU’RE PLANNING TO KIDNAP ME AND TORTURE ME WITH YOUR KISSES—I THOUGHT MAYBE YOU SHOULD COME UP WITH A BELIEVABLE RANSOM NOTE. RIGHT? DON’T YOU THINK?

  SO…HERE GOES.

  After all of the emotional and mental torture that I have endured while held hostage at PLCC I am no longer able to define behavior that is considered acceptable from behavior that isn’t. With that being said, a fellow student emailed me while I was held captive and when we got out I couldn’t imagine a future without him. So, I’ve kidnapped him.

  Every hour on the hour I plan to torture him in the most wicked ways—using tools ranging from my mouth, to ropes, and canes. Eventually there won’t be one area on his body that hasn’t been explored by mine.

  If you want to see Eli back before he is nothing more than a sated, drained shell of himself…you must pay me the sum of

  $1,000,000,000 dollars that can be deposited into my Swiss bank account.

  The email went on, but I couldn’t risk laughing aloud.

  Eli was simply genius. How he was able to make me smile in the situation that I was in—well, it was a feature that I

  was very attracted to. Still chuckling, I clicked on the next one; the recent shot still echoing in my ears.

  SUBJECT: SAY SOMETHING TO:

  RheaVelvetKenzee@pacificlakescommunityc ollege.us.net

  FROM:

  EsiahJosephCurn@pacificlakescommunitycol lege.us.net

  RHE,

  EMM SAID SHE HASN’T HEARD FROM YOU. SHE’S WORRIED. I’M WORRIED, AND TO BE HONEST…A

  LOT OF THE COMMUNITY IS WORRIED. SO, WHY WON’T YOU RESPOND? QUIT THINKING ONLY OF YOURSELF. ARE YOU OKAY? WHAT’S THE SITUATION? ARE YOU ALIVE? QUIT THE SILENT TREATMENT AND UPDATE ME.

  ESIAH

  Oh my fucking God! Is he serious? I had never realized how narcissistic he was until now. I mean, did he not get that the world does not answer to his rules— especially not me anymore and especially not now when I have all this stuff going on?

  SUBJECT: RE: SAY SOMETHING TO:

  EsiahJosephCurn@pacificlakescommunitycol lege.us.net

  FROM:

  RheaVelvetKenzee@pacificlakescommunityc ollege.us.net

  ESIAH,

  I DIDN’T ANSWER YOU BEFORE BECAUSE I WAS UNSURE OF WHAT TO SAY OR HOW I FELT. LUCKILY, YOUR LAST EMAIL REMINDED ME OF WHAT A DOUCHE’ BAG YOU ARE.

  TO ANSWER YOUR QUESTIONS…

  YES I’M OKAY.

  THE SITUATION IS I NEVER WANT TO TALK TO YOU AGAIN.

  YES I’M ALIVE.

  …NOW, GO FUCK YOURSELF.

  ~RHEA~

  I just couldn’t stop shaking my head as I opened the last of the three emails.

  SUBJECT: GIVE ME AN UPDATE TO:

  RheaVelvetKenzee@pacificlakescommunityc ollege.us.net

  FROM:

  EmmoryVanessaJane@pacificlakescommunit ycollege.us.net

  RHEA,

  SO, MOM’S BEEN IN CONTACT WITH THE POLICE, THE GOVENOR AND ME—FILLING ME IN ON WHAT’S GOING ON. THE GUNMEN ARE ASKING

  FOR A CRAP-LOAD OF MONEY SINCE THEIR PLAN TO STEAL THE COLLEGE’S DIDN’T PAN OUT.

  THAT’S NOT GOING TO HAPPEN. THE ARMY NATIONAL GUARD

  AND SWAT TEAMS ARE MOBILIZING FOR A RAID IN A COUPLE OF HOURS— SOONER IF THERE’S AN IMMEDIATE THREAT TO YOU GUYS.

  WHAT’S GOING ON IN THERE?

  *EMM

  My fingers flew across the touch screen as I typed out a hurried response.

  SUBJECT: RE: GIVE ME AN UPDATE

  TO:

  EmmoryVanessaJane@pacificlakescommunit ycollege.us.net

  FROM:

  RheaVelvetKenzee@pacificlakescommunityc ollege.us.net

  EMM,

  I’VE HAD TO MOVE. ISAAC MATTHEWS WARNED ME THAT THEY WERE COMING FOR ME—SO I HAD TIME TO GET OUT AND HIDE SOMEWHERE ELSE. IT WAS A CLOSE CALL.

  THERE WAS ANOTHER GUNSHOT ABOUT FIVE MINUTES AGO. THEN SILENCE.

  AND, WHY DID YOU TELL ESIAH ANYTHING ABOUT ME? ABOUT THIS? I THOUGHT FROM HIS FIRST EMAIL THAT MAYBE HE CHANGED—BUT HE’S STILL THE SAME CONTROLLI
NG, MIND-FUCK OF A GUY HE WAS THE LAST TWO YEARS WE DATED.

  THANKS BY THE WAY…SO, QUIT TALKING TO HIM ABOUT ME!

  GET ME OUT OF HERE!!!!!!

  ~RHEA~

  Now that the crappy emails were taken care of and out of the way, I could focus on responding to Eli—if you could call it focusing. That single gunshot reverberated in my head, bouncing off the sides of my skull. Echoing.

  ECHOING.

  Why hadn’t I heard from Isaac yet?

  Panic was palpable in the duct. If I had a knife I’d be able to cut through it.

  GUY

  SUBJECT: YOU’RE A FUNNY

  TO:

  EliValenSnohe@pacificlakescommunitycolle ge.us.net

  FROM:

  RheaVelvetKenzee@pacificlakescommunityc ollege.us.net

  ELI, HAHA.

  YOU TOTALLY HAD ME LAUGHING TO MYSELF. I HAD NO

  IDEA YOU WERE SUCH A COMEDIAN? I READ YOUR LAST EMAIL RIGHT AFTER THE LAST GUNSHOT.

  ARE YOU OKAY?

  I’M WORRIED THAT YOU OR MY PROFESSOR OR ANY OTHER HOSTAGE HAS BEEN SHOT.

  WHERE ARE YOU?

  I WISH I WASN’T ALONE IN HERE…

  I tapped my fingers on the wall of the duct…should I tell him everything that I am thinking? I stretched out my legs and rotated my ankles, cracked my knuckles and rolled my head from side to side. The cramps were getting nearly unbearable.

  SO, THERE’S SO MUCH MORE THAT I WANT TO SAY TO YOU…

  FIRSTLY, MY EX HAS CONTACTED ME AND ALTHOUGH HE ISN’T IN THE PICTURE, I SHOULD WARN YOU HE’S A NARCISSISTIC PIG AND WILL PROBABLY MAKE OUR LIVES HELL.

  SECONDLY, SOMEONE THAT I HAVE LIKED FOR OVER A YEAR FINALLY TOLD ME THAT HE LIKED ME TOO…ONLY IT CAME AFTER YOU AND I FELL INTO A COMFORTABLE, SEXY AND EXCITING GROOVE; HOWEVER, I JUST CAN’T COMPLETELY DISCOUNT THAT THERE ARE FEELINGS THERE.

  LASTLY, YOU MAKE ME FEEL BETTER. WHEN I AM SCARED, LONELY, OR NEED COMFORTING…YOU ARE THE FIRST PERSON THAT I WISH WAS IN HERE WITH ME. WHAT I WOULDN’T GIVE FOR YOU TO BE ABLE TO HOLD ME RIGHT NOW, FOR ME TO RUN MY FINGERS THROUGH YOUR DARK WAVY HAIR, TO KISS YOUR FULL LIPS.

  ELI—PLEASE LET ME KNOW YOU ARE OKAY. ALSO, PLEASE IF YOU AREN’T REALLY THAT IN TO ME AND THIS IS JUST A CRISIS-TYPE-FLING- THING…LET ME KNOW?

  ~RHEA~

  No sooner had I hit send, than a new email came through.

  SUBJECT: KEEP QUIET!

  TO:

  RheaVelvetKenzee@pacificlakescommunityc ollege.us.net

  FROM:

  IsaacJoesephMatthews@pacificlakescommun itycollege.us.net

  THE GUNMEN ARE ON A WARPATH. THEY ARE HUNTING FOR YOU, ME, AND ANYONE THEY CAN FIND. THEY KEEP COMING UP HERE IN THE STORAGE AREA BELOW THE ATTIC. I WONDER IF THEY KNOW I’M HERE.

  PLEASE, PLEASE DON’T SAY A WORD UNTIL I CALL FOR YOU. DON’T ANSWER TO ANYTHING EXCEPT KENZEE…I’LL CALL OUT TO YOU BY THAT NAME.

  ISAAC.

  P.S. WORRYING ABOUT YOU IS KILLING ME. NOT BEING ABLE TO KNOW WHAT YOU WERE GOING TO SHARE IS KILLING ME. DO I EVEN HAVE A SHOT? I TRULY BELIEVE WE’D BE SO HAPPY AND I KICK MYSELF FOR NOT LETTING YOU KNOW MY FEELINGS SOONER…EVEN AT THE RISK OF LOSING MY JOB AND FELLOWSHIP.

  SILLY I KNOW, BUT IS LIFE WORTH LIVING IF YOUR’RE NOT TRULY LIVING? LOSING IT ALL WOULD’VE BEEN WORTH IT IF IT MEANT THAT I’D ALREADY HAVE YOU.

  A sudden onslaught of emotions caught me off guard. Why was I so worried about who I liked and if they liked me? What I needed to be worried about was how to stay alive.

  I threw my head up—looking straight into the air duct above my head. I placed my hands over my chest, trying to keep my heart from beating out of it.

  TWO MORE GUN SHOTS.

  Oh my God! Isaac!

  I listened and after the shots that startled me went off…there was absolute silence. Trying to keep my emotions

  in check and my adrenaline response under control, I tapped my phone again. I had never been so glad that I had it with me, I couldn’t even imagine what it would’ve been like being alone in these air ducts without it.

  SUBJECT: SHOTS TO:

  IsaacJoesephMatthews@pacificlakescommun itycollege.us.net

  FROM:

  RheaVelvetKenzee@pacificlakescommunityc ollege.us.net

  I HEARD THE SHOTS GO OFF AND IT SOUNDED LIKE IT CAME FROM WHERE YOU ARE. ARE YOU OKAY?

  I’M WORRIED.

  ~RHEA~

  I swiped the compose email icon and began typing.

  SUBJECT: 911 TO:

  EliValenSnohe@pacificlakescommunitycolle ge.us.net

  FROM:

  RheaVelvetKenzee@pacificlakescommunityc ollege.us.net

  ELI,

  I NEED YOUR HELP. EMAIL ME.

  ~RHEA~

  I hit send, glanced at the screen and it read 10:10. I was just too tired, thirsty and hungry to go on. I hadn’t

  realized how cold I was—I figured they must have the heat turned down overnight, causing my fingertips to become icicles. I quietly slid myself away from the open duct above me and laid down in a tight fetal position. My purse folded over as a pillow was sheer heaven.

  Chapter

  +7 Hours

  I woke up shivering. The silence was deafening, the blackness heavy and deep. I slid my way back towards the duct dead-end so I had enough room to sit up. I struggled to pull my body into a sitting position and then pulling my legs under me, tried to rock up onto my feet.

  OH THE PAIN! The pain was intense enough to send stars across my vision but I knew I had to try standing up. I had read enough online to know that sitting for too long was dangerous—something to do with blood clots. Actually, at this point I was so fatigued and hungry, so emotionally worn out…that who knew if I’d made this fact up or had actually read it somewhere. No matter. I forced myself up; first a squat, then half bent, until I made it up into a crooked, old man type stance—with my hands on my lower back. No easy feat considering the size of the duct.

  The heat surged on and a gust of damp, ice-cold air hit me—followed by a much drier, hotter air. It hit me like a wave, crashing over me. Dousing me head first until it had washed over my entire body. I shivered it felt so good, and I swear it washed the goose-bumps I’d been wearing all night, off. I felt them disappear. Did I already mention how amazing it was?

  My phone vibrated on the duct floor next to me and I bent like an old decrepit, worn-torn veteran. I swiped at the screen, 3.10 am. There was no email from Isaac, but a couple from Eli. Instead of my heart soaring, a heavy grief hit me.

  to read.

  Isaac’s dead…

  I couldn’t shake the thought as I pulled the email up

  SUBJECT: IT’S TIME! TO:

  RheaVelvetKenzee@pacificlakescommunityc ollege.us.net

  FROM:

  EliValenSnohe@pacificlakescommunitycolle ge.us.net

  RHEA,

  I’VE DECIDED IT’S TIME TO GROUP UP. THE LAST SHOTS WERE TOO CLOSE. I WANT YOU WITH ME.

  I NEED YOU TO MOVE SILENTLY THROUGH THE DUCTS AND GET BACK TO THE CLASSROOM THAT YOUR TEACHER FRIEND PUT YOU IN. I’LL MEET YOU THERE.

  WHAT KIND OF HELP DID YOU NEED?

  ELI.

  SUBJECT: WHERE ARE YOU!!

  TO:

  RheaVelvetKenzee@pacificlakescommunityc ollege.us.net

  FROM:

  EliValenSnohe@pacificlakescommunitycolle ge.us.net

  RHEA,

  WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU? I’M

  HERE.

  GET YOUR ASS HERE! ELI.

  SUBJECT: PLEASE BE THERE TO:

  EliValenSnohe@pacificlakescommunitycolle ge.us.net

  FROM:

  RheaVelvetKenzee@pacificlakescommunityc ollege.us.net

  ELI,

  I THINK ISAAC WAS SHOT. I’M ON MY WAY.

  ~RHEA~

  I glanced up into the vertical air duct that was my link to Isaac but nothing but blackness greeted me. I paused for a second longer, thinking that I had maybe heard ‘Kenzee’, but only silence hailed. I lowered myself back into the two foot by three foot duc
t, hung my purse around my neck, and began navigating the labyrinth of darkness with only my phone’s home screen as my light. I crawled more carefully than I ever had before in my life, pausing every few seconds to listen. Making sure there were no sounds, no voices, nobody nearby.

  Lefts followed rights. Dead-ends reached out to me and retreated as I surged forward towards an uncertain future, Emm’s favorite song ‘Soon We’ll Be Found’ cycled ‘round and ‘round in my head—bouncing off the walls of my skull.

  Turn around I know we're lost but soon we'll be found…Tomorrow we'll be free…

  And REPEAT. On and on I crept, the lack of light was oppressive, claustrophobic. My heart was racing, beating so loudly that at times I even found it hard to hear the song in my own head. My mouth was dry—it had long ago gone from glue-stick sticky to arid-desert dry. My lips

  felt like braille when I ran my fingers over them they were so cracked and dry. Always moving stealthily, stealing seconds that became long moments that I’d never get back…that Isaac will never get back.

  Where is that vent? Shouldn’t I be there by now?

  My breathing came in short pants, laced with fear and I struggled to move on. I struggled to move past the blindness that my renegade tears were responsible for. I had felt my phone vibrate long ago, but I was too afraid to look. What if it wasn’t Eli or Iaasc? There was a ‘T’ ahead and I prayed that it was the last one. Just a final left and I’d be there. My heartrate sped up and I didn’t care now that I was banging along…

 

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