by Gay, Gloria
“Your eyes, the color of the violets I gave you, were the beacon that held me fast in the horrible fog of war, where among the blasts of gunshot and cannon, despair at seeing friends cruelly felled could come to a man as quickly as death.”
“Tell me about your experiences, Simon.” There was a tremor of happiness in her voice at the thought that in the thick of war, Simon’s thoughts had at times reverted to her.
“My seeing the men I led to battle mowed down like grass by a scythe makes for horrible nightmares, Lydia. I have not spoken of it to anyone. I have no idea why it is that I am burdening you with it.
“I think it was because the thought of finding you when I got back was the only thing that held me in one piece.”
“I was so afraid, Simon, when I was told I was to participate in the season, that the memory I had held in my mind, ever fresh, had been one-sided and you would not recognize me on seeing me again, for I was little more than a child when we met.
“But then you were very young yourself, weren’t you, Simon?”
“I was not yet eighteen. I was waiting for my friend, Amby—William Rustwellon, when I saw you.
“And when I looked into your eyes, I knew your face would be in my mind for the rest of my life.” He led her toward a tree that appeared to have been there forever, for it had the widest trunk Lydia had ever seen on a tree.
Simon led her around the tree and stopped. He held her in her arms and for a few seconds they looked into each other’s eyes.
Simon then kissed Lydia on the mouth. Lydia gasped as her world exploded into thousands of stars that were bursting from the sun that peeked between the pines.
Never had Lydia felt the happiness Simon’s kiss bestowed on her.
“I’m…” Tears welled up in her eyes and Simon then took her hand. “We will get to know each other during these few weeks, my darling,” Simon said as he held her cheek with his hand.
“Fate has allowed us a second chance.”
“Do you believe in love at first sight?” he asked when Lydia said nothing.
“How could I not,” Lydia replied, “when that is what I felt the first moment my eyes beheld you.”
“And I,” Simon replied. “My heart was yours the moment I looked deep into your eyes, where teardrops glistened and when you touched my hand.”
“That moment is always fresh in my heart,” said Lydia.
“I will be happy, Simon. I will not think what may happen at the end of the season or even before the end.”
“I was very concerned at how the woman with you treated you, Lydia. More than anything I was concerned for your safety.”
“More than caretakers she and her brother are my jailers, Simon. I have had to defend myself from that awful man on several occasions. I am forced to call him ‘uncle’ although he is anything but an uncle.
“And although I was glad Miss Conty had a lock installed in my bedroom to keep her brother from assaulting me, I knew that it was not my safety she was safeguarding. She was just making certain her income was protected.”
Simon was certain Jalenta intended to get Lydia married before her twenty-first birthday to someone who would answer to Jalenta, only.
But he had no intention of allowing that to happen, so it was no use getting Lydia more upset.
“I made a drawing of you, on the afternoon of the day I met you,” she said.
“I’m glad.” Simon smiled. “I have no talent in art, or I would have done the same. But through the years your face has been in my memory as clear as the first time I saw you.
“I was so afraid the Conty woman was going to be with you for the entire season,” Simon added.
“She had an accident and sprained her leg.”
Lydia told him about Jalenta’s accident and the doctor’s words.
“Dr. Vending asked to call on me here,” she told him. “He seems a kindly man. The other doctor was very much in her pocket.”
“Dr. Vending has told us the horrible conditions you have lived under, Lydia, and has documented many things for which he has witnesses,” said Simon.
“He told us he opened a diary in order to document each abuse he was witness to or heard about from servants that were dismissed from your house.”
“Yes,” Lydia replied. “When I grew up, I often wondered why Jalenta was so cruel toward me when her income depended entirely on me. But there was nothing I could do. I had never been allowed to make friends and she dressed me like a pauper so that I would not be noticed. Even when I grew enough to inquire as to why she dressed me with discards and punished me for the slightest often invented infraction, I had no way to defend myself, no one to turn to, for I had never been allowed to contact anyone.
“I feared mentioning to Aunt and Uncle Sandvel the conditions I lived under because I feared I would put them in danger, as Jalenta was vicious toward people she considered her enemies.
Lydia and her Aunt Julia waited for the modiste in the front parlor.
“I have booked you for a fitting of your court gown today, my dear. I am anxious that your court presentation go smoothly, but what I am most anxious about is that it be over with.
“Her Majesty has scheduled the next presentation for Tuesday next so we must hurry to get your gown ordered today so that it will be ready for that day. We only have six days to do so.
“There are so many events you absolutely cannot miss that we must organize properly in order not to offend any hostesses.”
“I am so glad that the Conty woman will not be hampering our movements for the first three weeks, my dear. It is enough that she has insisted in attending all the events with you. She wants to keep an eye on you because it is not to her benefit that you should marry, for she will lose her income.
“Amazingly, your mother forgot to make a provision for her and her half-brother in the event you marry. It is not surprising, considering how ill Elizabeth was at the time.
“But I am certain Jalenta Conty has stashed away some funds from your income, for she appears a woman who sees to her future with appalling vehemence.
“She has saved the wages of one maid, at least,” said Lydia, “For I have been a maid in that household since I was about twelve years old.”
“I am certain Jalenta is already plotting to thwart any plans on your part to marry if the occasion should warrant it. Attending the season is primarily to secure a good marriage so I can imagine how worried she must be.”
“Worried that her income will disappear,” said Lydia. “They provided amply for themselves and they allowed only the scraps from the kitchen for me. The clothes I wore were discards from the maids or purchased from the rag man. I was not allowed any visits or friends. If a maid became a bit close to me, she was promptly dismissed. I overheard Miss Conty once, laughing and telling her brother that the way she dressed me ensured that no one from society would give me a second glance.”
“I am certain she must be very worried that for the first time in her life she is in danger of exposure,” said her aunt. “Doctor Vending is helping us make a case against her.
“I suspected you were being systematically abused, my sweet and that was why we fought so hard to take you away from her. It is the tragedy of my life that we could not succeed.”
“The first and the supper waltz, Lydia?”
“Yes, Simon,” Lydia agreed eagerly.
Their group, comprised of Sir Harold and Lady Sandvel and Lydia’s new friends, Amby and his sisters, Edwina, Cassie and Isobel, were having a picnic in Green Park and Simon was referring to the next ball, at the home of Lord and Lady Beeching, that was to be held the following Saturday.
Lydia smiled at Simon. She and Simon had become closer and closer to each other.
Each day she woke up hoping what was happening to her was not a dream she would wake from. She would stretch luxuriously on the feather bed that she never tired of admiring. The bed was so soft she felt that she floated as in a cloud. She hoped that Simon would maneuver things
again during their outing so that they managed to kiss again.
The sheets and covers were soft and hugged her skin rather than scratch it as the deplorable bed she was forced to sleep on at home did.
She was to meet Simon at Green Park for a picnic where his friend Amby was to attend with his sisters.
Simon was anxious that she befriend Amby’s sisters, as the girls were difficult to make friends, not having any town bronze and this being their first season. All three were to be launched on the same season, since, as Simon confided to Lydia, there were only a small amount of funds, so the girls would have to make do with only a few gowns each.
The gowns for their presentation had been borrowed, as were the jewels.
My gown for my presentation may be new but I have no jewels to go with it, thought Lydia. She was happy to have something in common with Amby’s sisters whom she was anxious to meet simply because everything dear to Simon was dear to her and Amby was Simon’s closest friend.
As if transmitting her thoughts, her Aunt Julia provided a necklace and earrings for her presentation at court, which was to be the following morning at eleven.
Lydia was glad to have Amby’s sisters for company in such an awe-inspiring event as her presentation to the queen was, but she was also very glad when it was over, and she returned the necklace and earrings to her aunt.
Chapter 21
A couple of days after the court presentation, Simon called on Lydia.
“I am so glad you have befriended Amby’s sisters, Lydia.” He told her with a big smile.
“They are so disparate in character and yet you have managed to become friends with all three. Amby is impressed with you.”
“I have never been allowed to make friends, Simon, so I was so happy to have the occasion to make three wonderful friends at once. I delighted in speaking with each one of them and finding out what each is fondest of and how they view the season.
“You will be surprised that the only one who is looking forward to the season is the youngest one…”
“The hellion, Cassandra,” said Simon with a wide smile.
“Hoyden,” Lydia corrected and added, “A hellion is a much harsher description. Why she was branded as a hoyden is incredible to me, though. At least from her explanation.
“And what was her explanation?”
“She rode early one morning as was her habit across Wide Field, as the place is known in her town and where such a reputation was attached to her.
“She was going at a soft trot as she usually went when she was seen riding her horse by a crowd of people that were in a sort of pilgrimage heading toward the church.
“Suddenly, her horse became spooked by a large bee that attached to its nose and bolted with her on him, hell-bent on ridding itself off the bee.
“Cassie would have been thrown from her horse had she not had the presence of mind to force her hands under the saddle and to hold on for dear life.
“Because of this she suffered bruises to her hands so deep they took a long time to heal.
“She cut a wide swath through the pilgrimage crowd, her horse bounding right and left, forcing people to jump out of its path.
“She was lucky that only two or three people suffered any damage and it was very small, at that, branch scratches and such.
“I should think she would have been lauded for her bravery, presence of mind and great common sense. Instead, the town’s biddies, together with the vicar, made certain she was branded as a hoyden, merely because she was smart enough to save herself from a broken neck.”
Lydia shook her head in annoyance.
“You are very sweet to explain this to me, Lydia,” Simon said. “Cassie never explained herself to Amby, she just clamped her mouth shut and said all those people that had branded her thus should go to Hades in a hurry.”
“That is not exactly right, Simon. Cassie told me that she did try to explain what happened, several times, only to be shouted down by the vicar and those awful women.
“Amby should have questioned her in private, at home. Instead, because he was so frazzled, having to pay for the small damages with almost non-existent funds, he took their word against hers when they accused her of endangering their lives, without the slightest regard for their safety.
“They were eager to brand her as a hellion without allowing her the courtesy to explain what had happened to her, shouting her down when she tried to explain.
“If Amby thinks that such treatment toward her is ‘allowing you to say your say’ and is fair to his sister I don’t think he is being just. After all, since he is the head of the family, he should have allowed his sister to tell him in private her version of the accident.”
“I shall tell him what you told me, Lydia, and thank you for caring enough to find out what the facts were in the accident.”
“Thank you, Simon. I am glad you will interfere. It will mean so much to Cassie, for she loves her brother and it is not good that she has lost faith in him because of his treatment of her in this incident.”
“All will be sorted out once I speak to him, Lydia. You can be certain of it.”
“I’m glad she has a friend and champion in you, Lydia,” he added, “and I thank you for your understanding. I will speak to Amby about this, I promise you.”
“Thank you,” Lydia said, softly. She was breathless from speaking forcefully in Cassie’s defense.
Lydia’s suffering has made her a sweetly understanding human being, Simon thought. This was one more reason he loved her.
He leaned closer to her, looked deep into her eyes, and placing his hand on her back, moved her a bit closer to him. He then lowered his head and kissed her full on the mouth so that her gasp was lost in his kiss. He then encircled her with his arms as sizzling waves rippled through him and he would have stayed like this for hours, without regard for the time, for he had never been happier in his life than he was at this moment as he felt that heaven had descended on him.
Chapter 22
Once the Court presentation to the Queen was out of the way, the girls began to prepare for the first ball of the season.
“My dear Lydia,” said her Aunt Julia, “You look beautiful in that gown.”
Lydia stared at her aunt, her eyes somewhere else, so that she had to give herself a mental slap and bring herself back from the memory of Simon’s last kiss, which had been earth-shattering for her and which had come back to her dozens of times and at the most inconvenient times, such as this one.
She longed for another such kiss and wondered if Simon remembered the kiss as she did.
Yes, he did, she told herself, for she had seen the deep look of love in his eyes, holding her steady and attached to earth only by his arms.
Without his arms holding her she would have shot out into the sky.
“You have the strangest look, my dear,” her aunt was saying, but there was a quirky little smile on her aunt’s mouth, as if she could tell exactly what Lydia had been thinking of.
They were at the modiste’s and Lydia was at her last fitting.
The ballgown design she and her aunt had chosen was in an ethereal white sarcenet with a silk gauze over-skirt embroidered with white silk blossoms in a climbing vine pattern. It made Lydia’s breath catch.
Madame Gennette had obtained the white sarcenet and the embroidered silk gauze in her latest shipment from France, but although she had ordered enough for several gowns the shipment only included enough of the embroidered silk gauze for one gown, thus making sure that no other girl would have a ball gown with the breath-taking gauze.
“I could not obtain more of this lovely gauze, Mademoiselle. You profit from it, yes?”
“Does it mean that I shall be the only girl with this heavenly gauze on her ball gown, Madame?”
“Certainement, Mademoiselle! In France, yes, there may be a few girls who may wear the beautiful embroidery, but in your country? Non! You will be the only girl with the heavenly ball gown.”
�
�Your lovely gown takes my breath away, my sweet Lydia,” said Lady Sandvel, happier than she had been in a long time as she sat gazing at her dear niece, with the same love as if she had been her own daughter.
“I cannot recall a more beautiful debutante than Miss Millston, Lady Sandvel,” said madame as both ladies commented on Lydia’s amazing beauty in low tones, so that Lydia would not have her head turned, as they gazed with pleasure at her as she stood on the two-step round dais in Madame’s fitting room.
As she gazed happily at her niece, a tremor went through Lady Sandvel as she recalled the secret message the cook at Jalenta’s household had sent her, informing her that Jalenta had recovered from her accident and was now walking without her stilts.
Madame Genette pressed her hands together and sighed with pleasure, pulling Lydia’s aunt away from her worriesome thoughts. “We will have our tea now, yes madam?”
Lydia and her aunt had arrived at the shop three hours ago. They were exhausted.
“Yes,” said Lady Sandvel, “I am looking forward to it!”
Lady Sandvel worried day and night. Would Jalenta insist that the closeness Lydia and Simon now enjoyed be stopped? What would happen once Jalenta was Lydia’s chaperone?
As she waited for Lydia to emerge from her first fitting at Madame Genette’s stylish establishment, Julia realized that she was making herself sick with worry. Perhaps she should just block all thought of that awful woman from her mind, until she became Lydia’s chaperone during the season.
Lydia emerged from Madame Genette’s dressing room just as the Rustwellon sisters and Lady Fargan, their sponsor, arrived at the shop.
The girls exclaimed at Lydia’s new ballgown and declared that it would be the most beautiful gown at the ball.
Lydia asked them to help her with the numerous tiny buttons, so they all crowded into the back room to help her get out of the lovely gown.
They then lined up one by one to be fitted for their own gowns as Lydia and her Aunt Julia sat by the dais as the girls were measured.