Well, fuck you, Dr. Murray. You’re the one who got us here.
She straightened her shoulders and closed the door behind her. She was tired, wet, her feet hurt, and she couldn’t get a job. Who the hell did he think he was, being disappointed in her? A bead of water dripped off the tip of her nose.
“Are you going to sit, or are you going to drip?”
Narrowing her eyes, she sat on the chair he gestured to and took a deep breath. “I’m not going to participate in your study. Thanks for the opportunity.”
It wasn’t even worth sitting down to deliver the news, so she stood and headed to the door.
“Nora,” he sighed. “Sit back down, please.”
“I think we’re done.”
“Nora.” His voice turned hard and commanding, and held a warning.
She turned despite herself, and gripped the back of the chair, holding on tight. Standing up, he dropped his glasses on the desk and rubbed his eyes. Then he walked to the front of the desk, leaning against it.
“It was part of the study.”
“I got that.” And it didn’t matter.
“I needed a baseline to your stress response. Jessica took your pulse while Grant watched for demonstrable signs of breakdown.”
She clenched her fists.
“I’m not trying to be a jerk, Nora. But all of this was in the contract you signed. It said specifically you would experience events and questions of a triggering nature.”
“It said questioning, Dr. Murray. It never said events.”
He turned around, grabbing a paper off the desk and handing it to her. It was her contract. He pointed to a section, and she read it. It said exactly what he claimed.
“Well…” she said aloud. “Balls.”
He started to laugh. “Nora. I know I messed up. I didn’t think.”
“No shit.”
He chuckled again and sat in the chair next to her. He was quiet for a moment and then spoke in a low, urgent tone. “This study is my life,. I know people say things like that all the time, but this is the truth. I think what I discover here could change the world. I believe it with my whole heart.”
She didn’t doubt what he believed, but he’d have to do make his conclusions without her.
“I need you, Nora.” His face was earnest and beseeching.
“I can’t be part of it, Dr. Murray. As much as I want the things you’re offering, I don’t trust you.”
“You know what was fascinating about your response yesterday, Nora?”
Interested despite herself, she shook her head.
“When Nils accelerated, and you believed he was about to hit the students, your pulse rate spiked to 60 beats a minute.”
“I don’t know what that means.”
“Your heart rate barely changed.”
“I was scared out of my mind. My heart was pounding.”
“Maybe so. But the worst response you had was to yell at us and to close your eyes. You actually tried to reason with Nils. Not one of my study participants has done that before.”
“I nearly peed my pants.”
“Maybe.”
“And now my side is killing me after Nils jammed on the breaks.”
"It was a massive oversight.” He rubbed his forehead. “And Seok was right. It was the kind of thing the college wouldn’t like. I could lose my tenure.”
She narrowed her eyes. “Yes. It would be unfortunate.”
“I’ve apologized, Nora. But I’m not going to beg you to stay. I want you to stay, but if you’re going to leave, this is the time to do it.” He held out his hand, and she stood, her shoes squishing as she walked to shake his hand. He squeezed it once and let her go.
“Call the business office on Monday and they’ll set you up with a payment plan for what you owe the college.”
“What do you mean? I didn’t…” She dropped his hand and stepped away.
“There were some nonrefundable fees to hold your dorm room, but I don’t know how much it is. The business office will tell you.”
“Shit.” She shut her eyes. “Shit. Shit. Shit.”
“Don’t stress about it Nora,” he told her. “Like I said, they have payment plans.”
“I’ve gotta go.” How was she supposed to tell the guys about this?
“Take care, Nora. And if you need anything, call. I’m really sorry things worked out the way they did.”
“Okay.” Her mind was already moving ahead, trying to figure out payment plans, jobs, interest, rent, groceries. Fuck saving, that wasn’t happening. She left without saying goodbye, or even seeing where she was going. She walked into the rain, rushing down the steps. The rain was coming down harder. She put her hand above her eyes, trying to see through the water dripping into her face.
“Nora!” Apollo grabbed her. “Crazy girl. I should have given you an umbrella. How’d you get so wet between here and the bus stop.”
“I walked.” Her teeth chattered so badly she could barely get the words out.
“Oh, chére.” Matisse took off his coat and put it around her shoulders. He wrapped his arm around her, hurrying her to the parking lot.
The boys spoke, but the rain poured harder and harder, drowning out their voices. Apollo’s car ahead of them, the lights flickered as he unlocked it, and they all piled inside. He started it, the windows fogging when he blasted the heat.
“Why did you walk?” Seok asked in a low voice.
She turned toward the back seat. The four guys were packed like sardines, shoulders pushing against each other. He inched forward, trying to get closer.
“I was done early, and—“ She stopped. “I needed to get out.”
She caught Cai’s loaded stare. He seemed to understand everything she wasn’t saying. “Job a no-go?”
She shook her head, willing her body not to cry. When it seemed like she’d lose the battle, she turned around in the seat, facing forward, and then, when she saw Apollo watching her face, she turned toward the window.
“Nore?” Ryan asked in her ear.
Her voice cracked, and Apollo immediately took her hand. “We’ll talk at home, baby. Just get warm.”
She nodded, still staring out the window. Apollo drove through the wet streets. The wind and rain whipped at the trees, covering the road in orange and yellow leaves. The storm would strip the foliage, and by tomorrow, the trees would be bare and everything would be brown or grey.
He drove the car into the driveway, maneuvering around the other cars into his space. She opened the door before anyone else could, and the guys jumped out behind her, all of them rushing to the front door.
“Go upstairs and dry off,” Apollo told her. “Take a warm shower. We’ll wait for you here.”
Matisse looked like he wanted to argue and Ryan’s face was tight with worry, but no one said anything.
She kicked off her soggy shoes and peeled off her socks before hurrying up the stairs and into the bathroom. Her fingers were pruney and numb and she struggled with the button on her pants and shirt. She’d been so careful choosing her interview outfit, and in neither interview did she even have to take off her jacket.
Her clothes fell on the ground with a wet smack. She wrapped the towel she’d hung over the down knob around herself and turned on the shower as warm as it would go.
She yanked the elastic out of her hair, finger-combing the braid until her hair laid against her skin in long, wet curls. She stared at her reflection in the mirror, waiting for the steam to fill up the room and obscure her face. She sighed, dropping the towel and stepped into the shower.
The warm water did nothing to dissipate the dread settled firmly in her stomach. She was fucked. So fucked. She stood under the stream, letting the water pound against her muscles. Her entire body ached, tense from both the events of the day, and the cold. As she warmed up, her shoulders slumped, but she was far from relaxed. She still had to talk to the guys, and then she had to figure out how deep in the hole she was. She knew they’d want to p
ay whatever debt she accumulated in 24 hours.
It seemed unbelievable, but she knew how the college worked. There were fees on top of fees on top of fees. She hadn’t even spent a night in her dorm room, but she owed for it as if she had.
She groaned, leaning her forehead against the tile.
The door opened, and Ryan asked, “Are you okay?”
“I… “ She opened the curtain and shrugged. “I’ll be right out.”
He waited for her to elaborate, and when she didn’t, hurt flashed across his face, but he nodded and left her alone.
It is possible to feel worse. She turned off the water and got out of the shower. Wrapped her long hair around and around, she secured it in a bun. Then she dried off quickly and rushed back to her room to put on a sweatshirt and sweatpants along with wooly socks.
The boys were where they said they’d be, eyeing her cautiously, and reminding her she owed Ryan an apology.
“I’m sorry.” He shook his head quickly.
“I think I know what happened.”
She nodded, wiping her tears with the palm of her hand. “Both jobs were busts. They saw my name and said no way.” She sat on a chair, pulling her legs up and stretching her sweatshirt over her knees. “That was it. Just, ‘You’ll scare the customers.’ ”
Cai exchanged a glance wth Ryan, but neither of them said anything.
“I offered to stock shelves at night,” she went on. The boys immediately began to argue with her, and she held up her hand. “He didn’t go for it. I offered to work evenings, nights, weekends, in the back! Neither job would take me.” She took a deep breath. “I don’t think I can get hired in this town, and honestly— maybe not in Vermont.”
“You can’t leave.” Cai’s deep voice was worried.
“I don’t know what to do.” She hesitated while she formulated the next blow. “Dr. Murray told me I owe the college money.”
Her words sent them over the edge. Ryan’s voice boomed the loudest, and she had to hold out her hand, demanding his phone before he started making calls. “You know how this place works.” She stared at Apollo and Ryan who she knew were currently enrolled, and Matisse who was auditing. “There are registration fees, and holding fees, lab fees, and taxes.”
“I’ll help you,” Ryan said.
“I don’t even know how much it is.” She rubbed her forehead before leaning her face against her knees.
“We’ll figure it out,” Matisse added. “You don’t have to do it out alone.”
Jealousy
Matisse walked into the house and threw his wallet on the coffee table before falling backward onto the couch.
“What’d they say?” Apollo glanced away from the book he was reading.
“ ‘Tough shit.’ ”
He smiled, a quick flash of dimples before getting serious. “How much was it?”
“I didn’t think Nora heard them correctly,” he mused, not answering the question.
“Where is she?”
“Outside. Walking up and down the block. She wanted to walk back from the Business Office, but I was worried.”
Apollo nodded. “I notice you’re purposefully avoiding the question.”
He sighed, running his fingers through his long hair. “Around ten thousand.”
“Ha. Very funny. How much?”
Matisse eyeballed him.
“No.”
Reaching into his back pocket, he pulled out a piece of paper and reading down the list of charges. “Room Reservation Fee: $1050, Room Cancellation Fee: $1050, Comprehensive Fee: $1087, Housing and Meals Fee, Late Cancellation: $5084, Supplemental Room Charges: $853…” He dropped the paper next to him, blowing out a breath.
“How did I not realize they fuck you so much?”
“You have a scholarship.”
“Still, I get the bills. I guess I focus on the total.”
“This bill is bullshit. It’s been four days, but they’re not budging. No exceptions.”
The front door closed, Apollo attempted to clear his face of emotion when Nora sat next to him.
“I want to throw up.” Her face was grey, hinting she was about to do what she threatened.
“We’ll figure it out.” He wrapped his arm around her shoulders and pulled her close.
She took a deep breath, making Apollo chuckle. “Are you sniffing me?”
“You always smell so good.” She rubbed her face against his shirt.
He sniffed her head. “You smell like me still.”
Matisse rolled his eyes. “Now I’m going to throw up. Allons-y, chére.” He grabbed Nora and pulled her into his lap, earning a glare from Apollo. He didn’t miss the nervous glance she gave Apollo. At first, he was offended, thinking he made her nervous, but then he realized she was worried about Apollo’s reaction.
Matisse watched him closely. His knee began to shake, and then relax as he forcibly unclenched his muscles.
Maybe I should go easy on the PDAs. He thought about Apollo’s reaction when any one of them grabbed her. He certainly snuggled her in front of the other guys, and Apollo never checked himself either, but he seemed to be the only one with an issue when someone else was affectionate.
It bothered Matisse, but not enough to stop. He needed that physical connection with her. Since he’d fallen for her, he’d been less jumpy, less overwhelmed. Things which used to trigger him: being inside for too long, too many people talking, the tags on his shirt; those things didn’t flood his system anymore. When he was crawling out of his skin, he pulled Nora into his lap, and his brain rebooted. She was the best anti-anxiety medication he ever had. He wouldn’t stop reaching for her, touching her, kissing her, even for Apollo.
Hunching his shoulders, he rubbed his chin against the top of her head. He slid his hands along her arms until he could wrap her up tight. Just thinking about how he used to feel made his stomach clench in anxious knots. Her hands ran up and down his arms, setting off nerve endings and sending tingles along his skin. Her weight on his lap grounded him.
After a moment, Apollo stood. “I need to run upstairs for a minute.”
Nora reached out, faster than Matisse had seen her move before, and grabbed his hand. She tugged him back, and he let her. He dug in his heels a moment, refusing to sit, but she stared up at him with entreating eyes, and he sighed, landing heavily next to Matisse. Swinging her legs around, she put her feet on Apollo’s lap, and held onto his hands with both of hers. She leaned her head against Matisse’s chest, her hands slowly traveling from Apollo’s wrists, to his elbows, and then his shoulders. Soon his head was nearly beneath Matisse’s chin.
Matisse couldn’t move. His pants were becoming increasingly uncomfortable. Nora cupped Apollo’s face in her hands, and he watched, breathless, as she kissed Apollo.
“I love you both,” she said as he drew back. “You both have my heart.”
He leaned in again, kissing her gently before sitting back. His eyes flicked toward Matisse.
He never thought he’d be turned on watching his girl kiss his friend, but he was. He was so hard he suspected he’d find the imprint of his zipper along his dick. Nora shifted in his lap, and he groaned.
“Switch.” He lifted her and put her body in Apollo’s lap and took her feet. “Sorry,” he said, when she seemed confusion.
He adjusted himself, and her cheeks pinked.
The door slammed, making all of them jump. Ryan came inside, dropping his book bag on the floor with a heavy thud. His was face dark. “We need to talk.”
One More Thing to Worry About
Nora, Matisse and Apollo cuddled on the couch. Apollo was serious, but Matisse seemed guilty, causing Ryan to regard him suspiciously.
“What’s the problem?” he asked when he caught him staring.
Nice deflection, Matisse.
“Law School,” he began.
“It’s full of lawyers,” Matisse tsked, shaking his head.
Ordinarily, Ryan appreciated his attempts at humor, but today,
it merely grated on his nerves. “I was wait-listed. Which means paying the tuition to hold my spot, should it become available, but without the loans which come with free-and-clear admittance.”
His face got serious fast. “I thought your parents were helping you out.”
Nora got off their laps and walked over to him, sliding her smaller hand into his. Her touch eased his upset. He squeezed her hand gratefully and continued. “Yes. As much as they can. But their help was more along the lines of books, and car insurance, not tuition.”
Ryan sighed, she eased into his arms, her head resting on his chest, her arms going around his back to pull him closer.
“I don’t get it,” Apollo said from the couch. “You got a letter, early admission.”
“I know. I don’t get it either. Professor Bismarck is calling the Dean, but I don’t know if it’ll make a difference. They said they had more qualified candidates, but if a spot opens up, they’ll let me know.”
“How much?” Matisse asked.
“I don’t want your money, Matisse,” he replied, shaking his head.
“I can’t give you my money even if I wanted to, Ry. I’m doled out a certain amount each month, the rest is kept in trust as part of the settlement.”
Nora pulled away from him, eyebrows drawn together as she considered Matisse, but he was already standing and making his escape. “I’m going to make some calls, chère. I’ll be upstairs if you need me.”
He stopped next to them, dipping his head to kiss her. “That’s what I forgot! I meant to buy you new soap. You still smell like Apollo.” His attempt at humor earned a giggle. He lingered a moment, smiling down at her before he let the smile slip from his lips. He gave Ryan a loaded glance and went upstairs to his room.
He kissed the top of Nora’s head. “What are you doing today? More job applications?”
Blanching at his question, she shook her head, and let her arms slip from his back.
“No?” He was surprised.
“You can’t give up already, baby,” Apollo said from the couch.
She crossed her arms, and Ryan winced, Apollo had touched a raw nerve. She opened her mouth to respond and then shut it, defeated. “You’re right. Can I borrow one of your computers?”
Finding Nora: A Reverse Harem Romance (The Searchers Book 2) Page 7