“Thank you, Lord,” she said quietly as she stopped pacing and went outside and sat on the lanai. “Thank you for keeping me alive. How could I try to end my life when I have two precious little girls that need me and love me? How could I? Please forgive me,” she prayed.
Her thoughts switched back to her present dilemma. Supposed this wasn’t Carlton’s baby in her belly. It was possible that it could be Ryker’s child inside of her, but she doubted it. She and Ryker had made love weeks before her and Carlton first made love, and since then she refused Ryker’s sexual advances as often as she could without upsetting him.
“I better make an appointment to see my doctor,” she said, talking to herself. She got up and went to the office located on the first floor of their three story red brick home. She opened the French doors leading into the office and went inside. At the computer, she logged onto her doctor’s website and went to the tab where it said APPOINTMENTS. She proceeded to schedule an appointment. Just as she closed the tab, she heard someone enter the office. Looking up and around, she met eyes with Ryker.
“Hey, what you doing?” he asked, walking over to her.
“Oh, nothing. Just browsing the internet and looking at my social media page.”
“I see.” He kissed her on top of her head. “How was your day?”
“Quite eventful to say the least.”
“Oh? Why is that?”
“Me and the girls had lunch at Zodiac Cafe then me and Peyton went with Eva to her doctor’s appointment.”
“How is she?”
“I don’t know if I should tell you. After all, you’re the one that referred Harper to that attorney friend of yours.”
“Business is business. You should know that. It’s nothing against Eva. Harper asked me to refer him to a divorce attorney and that’s what I did. What did you expect?”
Avery shrugged her shoulders, turned around in the deep cushioned office chair, and proceeded to stand up. “You’re right. I can’t blame you.”
“So, how is she?”
“She’s not pregnant.”
“What?”
“The doctor said she had false positives on her pregnancy test. He performed an ultrasound scan and it showed that she wasn’t pregnant after all. She has some cysts that he suggested she have removed.”
“She should be glad about that. Maybe she and Harper can mend their relationship now.”
“I don’t know. She may not want to. Especially after the way Harper treated her.”
“Do you blame him?”
“I know you don’t want me to answer that.”
“Why wouldn’t I?” Ryker said. He sat down on the edge of the oak office desk, folded his arms, and waited on her reply.
“Let’s just say that you aren’t exactly one to talk. I forgave you for cheating on me, yet you treat me like I’m the one that slept around. But I don’t want to talk about that. What’s done is done.”
“Neither do I. It’s like beating a dead horse. I made a mistake. I asked you to forgive me. You said that you did. So it’s done. Over with.” Ryker tried to remain calm. He didn’t feel like arguing, he wanted to do what he could to make things work between him and Avery.
“Whatever, Ryker. Anyway, I told the girls that we would all go out for pizza when you got home.”
“Okay, that’s cool. I’m going to go say hi to them, take a shower, and we can leave around seven or seven thirty. How’s that?”
“Sounds good.”
Ryker left out of the office and went upstairs. He went to Lexie and Heather’s room and played with them before going to his and Avery’s bedroom to take a shower. He didn’t know how much longer his relationship could or would survive. Ever since Avery’s failed suicide attempt, things had been different. He liked that she acted more confident and sure of herself.
What he didn’t like was the lackadaisical way she treated him and their relationship. He blamed himself for not making her his wife. He didn’t know if deep down inside he felt like she wasn’t wife material. After all, when they first met, she was a high priced call girl and an exotic dancer. But was it her fault that he fell in love with her? He knew what and who she was before he became involved with her and yet when he ran back into her in Florida, he pursued a relationship with her. He had to admit that she changed her life around but there was still part of him that possibly punished her for her past life.
They were faithful members of Perfecting Your Faith and Ryker clung to his faith, hoping that he would become a better man. After Avery survived the suicide attempt, he set out to prove to her that she was special to him and that he loved her, because he did love her. He had made up in his mind that he wanted her to marry him, but she had refused on more than one occasion. That troubled him because there was a time when marriage was all Avery wanted from him. Now that he was ready to take that step, she had backed all the way off, but he refused to pressure her about it.
He stood under the hot jets of water and took a long shower, hoping somehow that the uneasy thoughts that saturated his mind would also be washed away.
Avery came upstairs, checked in on the girls to make sure they had changed clothes like she told them, and then went into the bedroom. Ryker was still in the shower. She went to an adjacent area of the master bedroom, separated by a barn type door. Inside was a space designated just for her. Her own woman cave. She smiled as she pushed the door to the side and entered the room. Ryker had his own man cave on the top floor complete with a game room, media room, and lounge. Her space was small, intimate, and just for her. She reveled in the peace and tranquility she was able to find inside that room. She went over and sat in one of the high back chairs in the far east corner of the room. It was a space where she often relaxed, read a book, or listened to some of her favorite music.
She gathered up both legs and sat Indian style in the chair, laid her head back, and thought about when and how she would tell Ryker that she wanted out of their relationship. She would have to be extra careful. With Ryker being a highly successful lawyer, representing celebrities and sports athletes alike, she knew the first thing he would probably set out to do was to get full custody of the girls. That was her major concern and the reason she had to handle things carefully. Somehow, she would have to find a lawyer that wouldn’t divulge to Ryker what her plans were. Not until she was good and ready. Maybe Carlton would be able to recommend someone.
She heard Ryker shuffling around in the bedroom. She went to the door and saw him standing at the chest of drawers with a towel wrapped around his glistening wet body. Ryker took good care of himself. His chocolate skin was smooth as a baby’s bottom. His naturally thick straight hair revealed his Indian heritage. Before he cut it, it used to come down to the middle of his back. Now he wore it cut close to his scalp. It accentuated his blackness and made him all the more handsome and sexy. It’s funny how the very thing that used to turn her on, now did nothing for her. He was still a good looking man, but in her eyes he couldn’t hold a candle to Carlton Porter. Carlton wasn’t half as attractive as Ryker, but when a woman’s heart shifted away from a man she once loved and adored, there was nothing that he could say or do to make her feel the way she once had.
Unfortunately, that’s what had happened with her. Ryker had hurt her too much and too deeply. No matter how good the love making used to be, it did nothing for her now. No matter how his kisses, or his look, used to set her on fire, it did nothing to her now. The blaze was gone and now only Carlton Porter could light it.
Chapter 7
“When an inner situation is not made conscious,
it appears outside as fate.” Carl Jung
“I want cheese pizza,” Lexie said.
“I want pepperoni and sausage,” Heather chimed in.
“What about we order one of each,” Ryker told his daughters.
“What do you girls think about that?” Avery asked.
“Okay, two pizzas.” Lexie and Heather replied.
Ryker went t
o order the two pizzas plus a salad for Avery.
Talking to her daughters and texting Eva at the same time, Avery looked up and saw Meesha, Carlton, and their four sons walking into the popular restaurant.
When did she get back in town? Avery said to herself. And why are they together? I thought their marriage was over. Carlton hadn’t given her any indication or reason to think that he and Meesha were going to try and salvage their marriage.
Carlton walked in, his hand went to the small of Meesha’s back. It was the same term of endearment he often showed her. Avery couldn’t help it. A twinge of jealousy mounted inside of her at the sight of them. They were laughing and talking like they were still the perfect family.
Meesha looked up and over in her direction. She whispered something in Carlton’s ear and then walked away from him, coming in her direction.
“Hey, girl,” Meesha said as she approached Avery’s table. She bent over and hugged Avery. “Hi, girls,” she said to Lexie and Heather.
“Hey, welcome back,” Avery said, returning the hug and trying to sound as happy as she could. “When did you get back into town?”
“Earlier today.”
“Oh, I see.” She looked at the front where Carlton and his boys were. She watched them out of the corner of her eye as they went toward a large table and sat down with menus in hand.
“How have you been?” Meesha asked.
“I’m good. I’m sort of surprised to see you back. Have things changed between you and Carlton?”
“Not really. But it’s not the place or time to talk about that. Have you seen or talked to Peyton? Not that I have anything to say to her. I heard from Eva when I first got back.”
“Yeah, the three of us had lunch today at Zodiac Café. I’m sure you’ll hear all about it later. It was quite an interesting day. That’s all I can say for now,” Avery remarked, looking at Meesha then at Lexie and Heather.
“I understand. I can’t wait. Eva texted me earlier when I first got home. I was supposed to call her back but got wrapped up with some other stuff. You know how it is when you’ve been away from home on a trip. Things have to get done.”
Ryker walked up. “Hello, Meesha.” He leaned in to hug her but Meesha stepped back.
“Hi, Ryker,” she said coldly. “We’ll talk later, Avery,” Meesha said and promptly walked off.
“Guess I know how she feels about me. No sense in having her lips on swoll just because I referred Carlton to the best divorce lawyer in this city, hell, in this state. I did the same for Harper, but I don’t guess Eva is whining about it.” Ryker grinned. “Hey, but it is what it is.”
Avery shrugged it off. Her mind was on other things. Like what was up with Carlton and Meesha.
Meesha crossed the busy pizza and game room floor. She sat down at the table with her family. “Have you guys decided what to order?”
“I know what you want,” Carlton said. “The veggie pizza, no cheese, extra marinara sauce and loads of vegetables.”
“You got it,” she said.
“I see Avery over there with her family,” Carlton observed. He locked eyes with Avery for a few seconds, then quickly shifted his gaze. Today was the day that he was supposed to tell her that things were done and over. He hadn’t. He had put it off, but knew that the longer he did, the harder it would be – on her. It threw him for a loop when he learned Meesha was coming home, so the last thing on his mind was meeting up with Avery.
The more Carlton thought about the situation and prayed over it, the more he understood the huge error of his ways. He was glad that he’d talked to his brother. Kingston helped him see that he had totally crossed the line. He was a man of God. He was supposed to be a person people could trust, confide in, yet, he felt he had taken advantage of Avery when she was at a low point in her life.
“Yeah, I went over there and spoke,” Meesha said, intruding on Carlton’s thoughts. “I’m glad I got a chance to see her. She looks good. Ryker, on the other hand, let’s just say I have very little to say to him.”
“Meesha, really, it’s no sense in taking things out on Ryker. He did what Harper asked him to do. Plus, that’s between Harper and Eva.” Meesha had no idea that Carlton had also talked to Ryker about recommending a good divorce attorney, and he referred him to the same fellow that he had referred Harper to.
“You’re one to talk.”
“Come on, babe. Let’s not do this. We’re here to have family time. I’ve missed you and my sons.” He looked at his boys who were busy talking to each other. “Can we go play some video games?” one of the boys asked.
“Sure. You think I brought you here just to eat pizza? We can’t leave until I beat you guys at basketball.”
“You can’t beat us,” Marlon rebelled.
“He’s right, Dad.” Malik said.
“Okay, tell you what. Here are the tokens I bought when we came in. Go have a good time. I’ll join you later when you’re ready for me to come beat you at basketball,” he teased.
“In your dreams,” CJ said and all of them laughed, including Meesha.
This was what she loved, spending time and hanging out with her family. Carlton was always a good father. If Liam really was his son, and they miraculously stayed together, she would have to find a way to blend him in with their family. It would take a lot of prayer, and she didn’t know if she would be able to do it in and of herself. It could only work out with God’s help.
She and Carlton watched the boys run off toward the bevy of video games inside the pizza place.
“Do you want me to go up and order the pizza or would you rather I wait until a server comes?”
“Doesn’t matter to me,” Meesha answered.
“Then I’ll wait on a server,” Carlton replied.
Meesha shrugged.
“Look, Meesha. I know I’ve put you through a lot lately. Telling you that I wanted a divorce, then all of this stuff with Peyton and Liam. I can’t imagine what you must be thinking. But I’m sorry.”
Meesha remained silent. She clasped her hands together and rested her chin on them with her elbows on the table.
The server walked up. “Are you ready to place your order?” the pleasant young woman asked.
“Yes. I’ll have one medium veggie pizza, heavy on the vegetables but no cheese and with extra marinara sauce, one medium cheese pizza, and a large pepperoni and sausage.”
“Will that be all?”
“Oh, a family size order of fries. We’ll wait on the drink refills until our order comes back.”
“Okay, I’ll put your order in now. Thank you,” she said and left their table.
“I still can’t do the vegan thing,” he said, looking at Meesha.
“That’s totally on you.”
“Meesha,” he said, getting serious. “I have never had an affair or messed off with Peyton. We were friends back in college, but you already know that. As far as Liam, I promise you, I didn’t know the circumstances surrounding him and Peyton. I knew that I might possibly have a kid out there somewhere because on one occasion years ago, when Liam would have been a toddler, I ran into Breyonna, and she told me I had a kid. I didn’t take her serious because the woman was a dope fiend. She asked me for money and I gave it to her, but I never saw a kid. Then when she showed up here in Adverse City, I didn’t know what to do. I learned later that she contacted Peyton threatening her and telling her she wanted Liam back. She told Peyton that I was Liam’s father.”
“And are you?” Meesha asked coldly.
“I don’t know. I honestly don’t.”
“Then why are you so willing to accept him as your son if you aren’t sure?”
Carlton paused in thought. He glanced in the direction of where Avery and her family were seated. Again, their eyes locked.
“Because,” he said, reverting his attention back to Meesha’s question. “Because he has a birthmark almost identical to mine and in the same place as mine. How likely is that?”
“I don’t k
now. It’s not like you have a lockdown on birthmarks,” Meesha replied smugly.
“True, but you asked me why I was willing to say that he was my son and that’s the reason why. But I’m going to have a DNA test to find out once and for all if he is my son. Regardless, I want things to work out between you and me, Meesha.”
“I don’t understand you, Carlton. You’ve been telling me for months that you want a divorce, that you no longer wanted to be married. Now you’re sitting across the table from me telling me that you’ve suddenly had a change of heart, and you expect me to come running back?”
“I know it’s a lot to ask. But I’m telling you, sweetheart that I ran scared when Breyonna came to town. I didn’t want to embarrass you so I thought before the media got wind of what was going on, the best thing to do was to divorce you. I wanted to be the bad guy because I was the bad guy. I don’t know how else to explain it. All I’m asking you to do is pray about it. Pray and ask God to show you what to do concerning our marriage,” Carlton begged.
“Did you think to pray before you asked me for a divorce, Carlton? Did you think to come and talk to me, to tell me the truth. My God, it’s not like you’re having an affair now. We’re talking about a child that’s fifteen years old!”
Carlton swallowed hard. He was not about to confess to having an affair with Avery. No way. But Meesha’s word gave him pause. A stab of fresh guilt pricked at his heart.
“I guess I didn’t. I didn’t trust God enough to give me the answer. I know that may sound funny, me being in the position I’m in with the church and all, but the human part of me ran scared. And again, I don’t know what else to say other than I’m sorry. I want my family back. I want you back, Meesha. I want my boys back. Please, baby. Please tell me that you’ll forgive me.”
Meesha’s eyes filled with tears. She didn’t want to cry. She wanted to be strong. She wanted to hate Carlton, but she couldn’t. This was the man that she loved. She fell in love with him the first time their eyes met and she’d loved him ever since. But he’d hurt her so badly and she didn’t know if she could be able to forgive him. She desperately wanted to, but the wounded part of her wouldn’t allow her to fully release Carlton to come back into her life. It would definitely take God.
The Real Housewives of Adverse City 2 Page 4