She’d never noticed it before but with his chin positioned the way it was, he resembled a bulldog. Not a ferocious one but one of those little designer breeds that were all bark and no bite.
“Let’s try this again and see if your simple brain can keep up. Where. Have. You. Been?”
Shannon withheld speaking. He’d gone from resembling a dog to pretending to be a bouncer at some seedy nightclub with his folded arms and wide stance. “I don’t have time for this. I have company coming. If you want to show off for your friends, do it with someone else.” She moved but not fast enough, and he grabbed her by the arm.
“Answer me,” he demanded, giving her a violent shake.
It was over. She was done being pushed around by him. “Take your fucking hands off of me,” she snarled, surprising herself and him alike. It was about time her backbone got here.
“I said—”
“And I said let…go…of…me.”
His touch nauseated her, and she shoved his hand away and began laughing. Her laughter grew until tears formed in her eyes.
“You think this is funny?” He glared at her. “You wait until we’re alone. Then we’ll see if you feel like laughing.”
Between gasps for air, she said, “Thank you.”
“For what?” he spat.
“For giving me the courage to finally say this.” She waited for her breath to catch up and then settled her sights on his dead, doll’s eyes. “You’re a pathetic man, and I loathe you. Oh, and by the way, I’m divorcing your fat ass. Now get the fuck away from me.”
The sounds of splashing water and a tune about little fishies swimming over a dam filtered out from the first-floor bathroom and kept Shannon company while she wiped the kitchen counters. She peeked in and saw Chad hold a sponge shaped like a fish, bright red and dripping, in the air. The sodden fish swooped and flipped through the air as it tried to clear the massive height of the make-believe dam, which was, in fact, Chad’s knees.
“Swim, little fishy,” the invisible mother fish called out in Chad’s voice. “Swim as fast as you can.”
Shannon returned to her cleaning and hummed along. Wiping, washing, rubbing—working to restore order to a kitchen she would soon be leaving. Her face hovered stark white in the window pane. Beyond her own reflection lay her future, buried in the inky blackness of the night. She blew at the strand of hair that had freed itself from the pile on her head. It felt unreal that she’d actually done what she’d been pissing and moaning about for six years. The big question was: now what?
Justin hadn’t reacted at all as she’d expected. What had she expected? Screaming? Yelling? Throwing punches? Threats? He’d done none of those things. If he had given some reaction other than simply snickering and walking away, she might not have felt so jittery. After everyone left, he’d taken his car keys and driven off. She knew him well enough that he wasn’t going to make a divorce easy, but she had no clue what his next move would be.
“Mama, I’m wrinkly,” Chad called out.
“Oh, no,” she replied. “It won’t do to have a wrinkly child.”
With her worries tucked securely in their place, she entered the bathroom and stood in the doorway. Her son’s glistening body resembled a pink rose after a summer’s rain. She wouldn’t let him down. No matter what hardships lay in store for them, she’d protect him and keep him safe.
She wrapped him in his bath towel and carried him upstairs. “My bed or yours.” Most child experts frowned upon children sleeping in their parent’s bed but screw them; they didn’t live with Justin.
After Chad fell asleep, she prepared herself for bed, but before climbing in next to Chad, she took Jasper out for one last sniff.
A pin of light shot across the starry sky. She’d often fantasized about fireworks going off when she finally stood up to Justin, but a shooting star would do just fine. “I am strong, fear me,” she whispered. “Bane to all who try to harm me.”
She allowed herself to think about her parting words to St. John before she’d left the truck. He’d asked if he could see her again. She had wanted to tell him yes. Every cell in her body had screamed the word, except for those comprising her brain.
‘If I ask you to stay away from me, will you?’ she’d asked.
His nod had been slow in coming. ‘If you ask me, I will. Are you asking me?’
‘Yes,’ she’d replied.
Over time she’d accept she’d made the right decision. She touched near her lips where his passionate kisses had left the skin raw. He’d brought her to life again, and she didn’t want him to stay away. But being with him, no matter how exciting, was unwise. They wanted different things, and even though she didn’t have a clue what she wanted, she understood it was more than he was willing, and capable, of giving.
“Sometimes what we want isn’t meant to be.”
She heard her quiet words and nodded. So mote it be.
******
“Are you listening, Shannon? You should tell Justin you were angry and didn’t mean it,” Dee said. “Jeff and I talked about you guys; you’re not great together, but Justin’s your husband, and you should make it work.”
Shannon, who’d been toying with the condensation on the side of her glass, frowned. She didn’t want to talk, but Dee and Peg had come over to see her because they’d been concerned. She owed them an explanation. “Fine. I’ll tell you what happened this morning but you…” She cast a stern expression at Dee. “Shall remain silent until I’m done. Deal?”
“Deal, but make it snappy. I have to be in Manchester by eleven.”
“What’s in Manchester?” Peg asked.
“I’m meeting St. John for an early lunch.”
Taking an interest, Shannon raised her eyes. No way would St. John tell Dee about yesterday or the night before. Right? “What’s going on?”
“It’s nothing. I have a favor to ask him, that’s all,” Dee said. “And you have to be in Concord by eleven?”
“What’s in Concord?” Peg wanted to know.
Shannon gave an unenthusiastic reply. “Justin asked me to pick up some papers he needs for a client.”
“You’re divorcing him, but you’re running errands for him?”
“He asked very politely. Of course, that was after he threatened to take Chad and disappear.”
“Okay, Shan, hop to it,” Dee said.
Shannon began her story by telling what had happened yesterday when she’d returned home and ended with Justin walking out after everyone had left last night.
“He didn’t say a word? Just left?” Dee asked.
“Yup.”
Peg scowled and asked, “What if he had come back? What would you have done?”
“I kept Jasper outside my bedroom and barricaded Chad and me inside. Plus, I had the panic button for the alarm with me.”
Dee half snorted and half chuckled. “What’d you do, drag your bed in front of the door?”
“Dee, stop with the questions.” Peg’s impatient scolding earned her a glare.
Undeterred, Dee said, “Didn’t Chad think that was weird?”
“He was asleep.”
“Okay, that’s it.” Peg smacked the table. “Dee, no more questions.”
“I’ll ask all the questions I want.”
Shannon took a sip of coffee and glanced around her yard. Tonight was the Summer Solstice and she had plans to celebrate by lighting a fire. The biscotti were already made, and she had a new bottle of bourbon waiting to be cracked open. She smiled at Dee and Peg, who were still going at it.
“Enough,” Dee announced. “Shannon, continue.”
“Justin arrived this morning when Chad and I were having breakfast. He poured himself a coffee and sat at the table with us. Chad was kicking the chair leg, and Justin barked at him to stop. Then he looked at me and, without caring that Chad was there, said, ‘I’m not divorcing you, in case you wanted to know.’”
“What did you say?”
Peg snapped, “Dee, quiet
. Go ahead, Shan, what did you say?”
“Since Chad was finished with his cereal, I told him to go upstairs and brush his teeth. Then I said to my darling, soon-to-be-ex-husband, ‘I didn’t ask your permission, and there’s nothing you can do to stop me.’
“‘Save it,’ he said. ‘I already told you, you’re not going anywhere.’ I got up and carried the dishes into the kitchen. He followed me and said, ‘If you want to leave, fine. I knew you never loved me and were using me for my money.’ He’s a pro at guilting people, but I stood my ground and told him he was right about the love part. Then I said, ‘As for your money, I don’t need it. You’ll buy out my portion of ownership in the house.’”
“How much money?”
“Peg, shush,” Dee said. “How much money, Shan?”
“Four hundred thousand. It’s half my inheritance from my grandmother. She may have been a bitter old coot, but she was a loaded bitter, old coot, and I was her only living descendant. The other half I put into decorating this place, buying the SUV, and I put some aside for Chad.”
Dee waved her hand. “Who cares? Finish.”
“Right. So I said, ‘Face it, Justin, you don’t have a say in this. By the end of the summer, you’ll be a free man to do whatever you want with Shelby, and Chad and I won’t have to endure your abuse any longer.’”
“You mentioned taking Chad?” Peg asked. “He must have flipped.”
Shannon took a sip of her coffee. Justin’s response concerning Chad had been frightening.
“Shan, hello. Finish,” Dee said.
“Justin said it’ll be a cold day in hell before he lets a witch raise his kid and that if he has to, he’ll take Chad and disappear.”
“Oh, my God.” Peg held her hand to her mouth.
“He’s just blustering, Peg. Don’t worry. He called me a few choice names and said he knew I wasn’t right for him.” She forced her voice down so she sounded like a guy. “‘This is the thanks I get for marrying you when you were pregnant. What were you going to do? Raise the brat on your own?’”
Dee leaned on the table. “What did you say?”
“I told him to expect to hear from my lawyer. Then I went upstairs to get Chad. We left, I brought him to school, dropped off the scones Jimbo ordered, talked to him a bit, and came back here.” Shannon pushed away from the table and stood. “And now I have to drive to Concord.” She kept the other errand she had to make a secret. Jimbo’s advice about visiting the bank was worth heeding.
Chapter 24
“If we don’t disappoint people, maybe they won’t disappoint us.”
Unknown
The expression on St. John’s face displayed disbelief as he witnessed the waiter getting skewered because of an undercooked cheeseburger.
“I could have gotten food poisoning,” Dee said.
The young man stammered out a second apology and included, “I’ve already offered to prepare a new meal for you, so I’m not sure what else you want from me?”
Dee’s cheeks blazed a violent shade of ruby. “What I want is to speak to your manager—that’s what I want. How dare you talk to me in that tone?”
“Okay, I’ve had enough.” St. John dropped the now cold fry onto his plate. He reached for Dee’s dish and handed it to the waiter. “Ben, I apologize for Mrs. Boyle’s behavior. Please bring her a chef’s salad, no ham, house dressing on the side.”
“I don’t want a salad,” Dee complained.
St. John ignored her and finished with the order. “You can take my dish too and bring me a bourbon. Make it a double, and a glass of ice.”
“Sure thing, Mr. St. John.”
Ben almost sprinted from the table with the two plates in his hands.
“How can you even eat here?” Dee said. “That burger was not made from cow meat, I can tell you that.”
St. John drained his iced coffee while she vented about her lunch. When she stopped to take a breath, he said, “I happen to like it here. The food is good as is the service. Maybe you should have a beer to calm your nerves; you look like you’re going to have a coronary.”
“I’m not upset,” Dee disagreed. “It’s just that I heard something that’s upsetting me.”
“Well, I am sorry. How about we move this lunch along, and you can go deal with whatever it is that’s bothering you?”
“Don’t you want to know what’s upsetting me?”
“Not particularly.”
“Has Hancock’s daughter gotten back to you about the farm?”
“Is this what we’re here to discuss?” St. John set his glass down. “No, they haven’t, but I’m sure they’ll accept the offer. Do something for me, will you? The next time you talk to Shannon, mention how hard I work to keep as many trees as possible when I’m building. I’m not MacMillan; he’s the…” He shifted his eyes toward the nearby table. A child was listening to him, and he’d almost added a new, colorful word to the kid’s vocabulary. “Just tell her, okay.”
Ben returned with the chef salad, which earned him a sour look from Dee, and St. John’s drink. St. John thanked him and poured half the bourbon over the fresh ice and tossed the other half into his mouth.
Dee inspected the ingredients of her salad, stabbed her fork into the lettuce, and bit into the crisp leaves. “Mm, not bad.” She swallowed and narrowed her eyes. “Why do you care what Shannon thinks?”
“Just tell her, okay?”
Dee responded, her mouth full of lettuce. “Anything I say to her about your sterling business practices will go out the window once she learns that you’re planning on developing twenty-eight thousand acres.”
St. John spun the whiskey around the ice cubes and took a sip. “I never said I’m going to develop it.”
“Then why do you want it so bad? Let MacMillan have it and move on.”
“Let’s move on. Why are we here?”
Dee chewed a piece of ham and said, “She did it.”
St. John set his glass on the table. ‘She’ had to mean Shannon and ‘it’ had to mean—
“Shannon told Justin she’s divorcing him,” Dee blurted out. “I didn’t think she’d do it; actually, I was sure she wouldn’t. She’s not a confrontational kind of person. I told her she’s made a mistake, and I can only hope she’ll come to her senses. I’m really upset about this. She’s going to get hurt. Chad too. And they only gave me one hardboiled egg,” she said, tossing her salad ingredients around the plate.
Leaning forward, St. John spoke quietly. “Stop complaining and eat the damn thing.” He rested against the back of his chair, lifted his whiskey, and took a long sip. He was thrilled Shannon had actually followed through, but where did this leave the two of them? She’d told him to stay away, and he’d honor her request, unless Baldos did something to hurt her. Then all bets were off.
He set his elbows on the table and bided his time until Dee’s mouth was empty. “How did Justin react when Shannon told him?”
“He called her some names, I guess, and said he’d never give her a divorce.”
“Did she back down?”
“Nope, she told him he didn’t have any say in the matter and to expect to hear from her lawyer. I’m sure she was bluffing about the lawyer unless she plans on calling your guy.” Dee went back to putting vegetables into her mouth.
“Marty’s very good at what he does. Does she have a timeline, such as when she’ll move out? Where is she planning on living?”
Dee bit off a piece of turkey and nodded. “Mm, not bad.” She swallowed and narrowed her eyes. “Don’t go getting any ideas, St. John. I appreciate you doing me the favor the other day, and she did say you were a perfect gentleman, which I question, but she’s still off-limits to you.”
“You have nothing to worry about. I have rules against that sort of thing.” St. John drained his drink and signaled for Ben.
“Yeah, well, we all know rules can be bent.” Dee pierced a slice of cucumber and nibbled on the edge before dropping it back to the plate and choosing
a narrow slice of cheese. “I still think she’s going to regret this. She has no idea how hard life as a divorced, single mother can be.”
When Ben returned St. John asked Dee, “Do you want dessert?”
Dee crumpled her napkin and dropped it on her salad. “Is the pie here good?”
“You won’t like it, but let’s give it a try.” He ordered two slices then responded to her previous comment about Shannon. “I’m intrigued. How do you have such a wealth of knowledge in the area of being a divorced, single mother?”
“Don’t forget I’ve placed loads of Wexford divorcees in condos around town; they can’t be happy.”
“Why? What’s stopping them?”
“Their guilt. They know in their hearts walking out of a marriage is wrong, and despite being pagan, Shannon knows it too. There are rules against divorce, and breaking them is frowned upon by the church and God. I’m really afraid He’ll take revenge on Chad to punish her.
St. John cocked an eyebrow and stared at Dee. “Excuse me? Did I just hear you correctly? Punish her? Are we living in the fourteenth century?” He accepted Denise’s zealousness for her religion. A lot of people were passionate about their faith, but she was supposed to be Shannon’s friend.
“Is this what you wanted to discuss, Shannon burning in the eternal flames of hell?”
“Nope, I have other news. Ready? Meredith’s house is going live. Malcolm called me Friday and asked me to handle the sale. He also said to tell you, and I’m paraphrasing, that he won’t sell it to you and to rot in hell.”
St. John stared at the slice of pie Ben had placed on the table and scowled, his appetite suddenly gone. “My brother always did have a flair for words. Why am I hearing this now and not last Friday?”
“I tried to tell you yesterday. Besides, what difference does it make? You can’t do anything until it’s listed.”
“This is unbelievable.” St. John mumbled a few more expletives under his breath. He was fully aware the kid next to them was more interested in their conversation than the chicken fingers on the plate in front of him.
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