Angst looked around to see if she was somehow inside, and sighed when she wasn’t. She was outside the curse, the protective dome that kept her out, and the ocean from flooding the city. He shifted to lie on his back with his head against the shield, and looked up. She swam outside, hovering beyond the dome like a dream. He reached up to the curse that divided them and smiled, in spite of himself. She was so incredible to look at, so fun. He shrugged and kept his hand on the shield. Moyra circled the crack several times, faster than Angst could believe, leaving behind a swirl of tiny bubbles that crept up the dome like spiders fleeing a nest. She rested her palm on the shield across from his.
“I miss you,” she said.
“Yes,” he agreed, his somber mood lightening.
“You should be over here,” she said, and he thought he could see her blurred smile through the thick shield. “So I can help you breathe.”
“I’d like that,” he said, and he did like it. It was the most legitimate excuse for something else, and she didn’t shy away. She never said he was too short, or too fat, or wanted him to be something else. It gave him strength.
“I am glad I did not eat you, hooman,” she said.
He laughed out loud, even if she wasn’t completely joking.
“Are you doing it?” she said, patting at the crack. “Can you make it bigger?”
“I haven’t figured it out yet.” He sighed. “I’m missing something, and there are so many distractions that I can’t concentrate.”
She kissed the shield for a long moment, her full lips large and squishy. He missed her breathing, missed her swaying in his arms. She pressed her firm breasts against the shield, and he stared like a twelve-year-old.
“There,” she said. “Now you are only distracted by me.”
“My favorite distraction,” he said, and couldn’t help but smile.
“Why are you so upset?” she asked. “Tell me.”
And so he did, relating as much as he could fit into a five-minute explanation. It was exhausting, but telling her about it made him feel better.
“You are silly,” she said.
“What?” he asked with a frown.
“You are trying too hard to be what everyone else wants, hooman,” she said. “Be An-gst.”
“That...that actually makes sense,” he said in surprise.
“Now save my people,” she said, rapping on the spot with her knuckles then expanding her hand wide.
Before he could coax more from her, she jerked about as if something was behind her. Moyra kissed the barrier near his face before pulling away and swimming to freedom. Closely behind, the enormous tentacled beast squished against the barrier as it lumbered past. The crack spread noisily, growing another third in size. The water now dripped freely. Dulgirgraut glowed brightly, and Angst smoldered. His one moment of respite, his one break, scared away by this thing.
“Somehow, I’m going to rip you apart!” Angst snapped.
Dulgirgraut flickered like a candle in front of an open window.
He pushed himself up to stand, his mind suddenly clearer than it had been since doing the sealtian with Faeoris. He actually had the urge to do them now, which seemed to excite the sword, but he chose to pace. Angst walked through the adventure in his mind. Everything from Heather’s kiss goodbye to yelling at his friends was clear as crystal. The only thing truly fuzzy was the dream he’d shared with Victoria. The one where Aerella had tried to tell him something important.
48
Angst returned to the decrepit inn with the tiniest spring in his step. Hector and Tarness had found two sturdy chairs and sat at a table in the middle of the room, chewing on hard bread and drinking water. Victoria and Faeoris sat cross legged on the floor in a corner, deep in a discussion Angst probably didn’t want to know anything about. They looked up at his entrance and giggled. He walked straight to his boys and held out a hand to both of them. Without hesitation, they gripped forearms and briefly shook. Nothing else needed to be said.
“Where’s Dallow?” Angst asked.
“He’s in a library, a big one,” Hector said with a smile. “He may never leave.”
“Angst, we found something,” Tarness said with a nod to Faeoris.
Tori and Faeoris walked over with mischievous grins.
Angst sighed deeply, just glad all seemed better.
“We found another foci,” Tarness said.
“You’re kidding!” he exclaimed. “Are you sure?”
“There was a dagger on a monument just like the one holding the swords,” he said, pointing a thick finger at the one over Angst’s shoulder.
“What did you do with it?” Angst asked excitedly.
“We left it alone,” Hector confirmed, eyeing Faeoris accusingly.
“What?” she asked. “I didn’t take it, yet. Nobody else is using it.”
“I don’t think you could lift it,” Hector explained. “We can’t.”
“You should have let me try. I’m not human,” she said proudly.
“I’ve noticed,” Angst agreed. “Way too pretty.”
Faeoris beamed, and he was amazed Tori wasn’t upset. She merely nodded at the Berfemmian knowingly.
“I’d like to see this foci for myself,” Angst said.
“There’s something else,” Hector said. “We may have heard Rose!”
“What?” Angst asked, surprised they hadn’t shared this first.
“I heard a cry. It may have been her,” he said. “We didn’t actually see her.”
“Faeoris and I followed a trail to a hole,” Tarness said. “Kind of like a cave.”
“Tori and I saw it too!” Angst said, more excited than before. “Let’s go!”
“Let’s not,” Hector countered. “I checked in on Dallow while you were...away. He was brief, but asked us to wait.”
“But...” Angst said.
“They’re right,” Tori agreed. “The feeling I get from that place, it’s all wrong. It’s dangerous.”
“All the more reason to go now,” he said firmly.
“Maybe we should have a better idea of what’s actually going on,” Tarness said. “Just this once.”
“It’s Rose, Angst,” Hector said. “Dallow wouldn’t ask to wait if it wasn’t important.”
Angst considered their options. He hated this. There was a chance Rose was alive. She was so close, and he could only imagine that she needed help. And another foci was nearby, in this city. Dulgirgraut buzzed in his head, warning him of everything but telling him nothing. He needed answers. He needed the missing puzzle piece, and he might know where to find it.
“Three hours,” Angst said firmly.
“I told Dallow two,” Hector agreed.
“That’s perfect. He’s always late,” Angst said. “I need that time to figure something out.”
“Oh?” Hector asked.
“The dream,” he said. “The one Tori and I keep ending before it’s done.”
“Oh,” Tori said quietly. “I was thinking of sharing a room with Faeoris.”
“As amazing as that sounds,” Angst said with a smirk, “we really need to finish this. Aerella said it was important.”
Tori looked at Faeoris reluctantly. Their tall friend shrugged but said nothing else.
“You’re welcome to join us,” Angst suggested jokingly.
“I’m not really that tired,” Faeoris said dryly.
Victoria and Angst stood in the middle of a vast field. Wind blew waves of tall grass that leaned through the bottom of their translucent hands. Angst looked down and wiggled his toes. Blades of grass popped through, and he could just imagine them cool and sharp, scratching and tickling. The day was bright, and the sun baked the field with a warmth he longed to feel and let sink into his tired muscles. He breathed deep, only to smell nothing, not fresh air nor flowers.
“Every girl’s dream,” Victoria said, eyeing him up and down.
“That’s me.” Angst sniffled. “Didn’t you know that already?”
/> A castle-sized boulder hurtled toward them, smashing onto the ground, ripping up dirt and brush with every tumble. They stood still, watching in awe as the small moon rolled through them, crashing past in a vicious hurry to wreak more damage.
“Dreams,” he said calmly. “A nice change from actually being in danger.”
“What am I wearing?” she asked.
“Upset that you aren’t naked this time?” he asked.
She stuck out her tongue, frowning. They were dressed in the most unflattering of eggshell robes, draped lazily over their shoulders and hanging down to their sandal-adorned feet. With a grunting sound, she kicked off the ugly shoes and shook herself out of the robe. Underneath the robe was another, equally boring. Thong sandals once again appeared on her feet as though never removed.
“Magic,” Angst explained.
“I can’t change my outfit,” Victoria said warily as she pulled her hair free from the robe to inspect it. It was straight and black, the way she’d worn it at the castle. “Why is this dream different?”
“It’s my dream this time, a foci dream,” he said. “And I didn’t want any distractions to suddenly pull me out.”
“Oh, so all of a sudden, I’m a distraction!” she shouted.
“You’re always a distraction. My favorite distraction,” Angst said gently. “I just wish you’d stop being angry at me.”
“I’m not angry at you!” she yelled. She leaned into her words with her hands on her hips.
“We should figure this out now,” he said. “All of it.”
“I don’t believe you kissed her.” She crossed her arms.
“Who?” he asked.
“Alloria,” she said, her voice filled with fury.
“She kissed me.” He couldn’t believe he was defending this again.
“What’s the difference?” Victoria cried out. “You didn’t pull back! You didn’t try to stop her!”
“No...no, I didn’t,” Angst said defensively. “She’s almost as pretty as you are, and I was flattered.”
She continued staring him down.
“I’ll admit, it was nice. I don’t get that sort of attention from anyone,” he said sadly. “But why would you care?”
“I just don’t think it’s appropriate when you’re married,” she said, brushing dark hair from her shoulders.
Angst’s jaw dropped. “How can you even say that after this entire trip?” Angst asked. “Bathing naked in front of me, crawling into my bed, twice...”
“Not to mention,” she said, her thin eyebrows frowning, “you kissing the fish.”
He didn’t say anything; his feelings for Moyra were complicated. His need for her wasn’t just love or lust. He couldn’t find a word to explain what she meant to him and hoped Tori could see through his lack of words. That relationship was something, Moyra was someone he could never have. She would never be his, but the feelings between them were so strong they’d numbed all his other pains. Maybe that was what had happened. Maybe he’d let this lovely, alien creature in to mask the guilt of leaving his wife at home rather than fixing their issues, or to hide the rift between him and Victoria and whatever their relationship was threatening to become. He couldn’t deny his feelings for Moyra, but was it possible? Was there more to it? Maybe it was time to start facing these problems before it was too late.
“I did kiss her,” he admitted. “Just like you kissed me.”
A giant ball of fire and lava zoomed over their heads, crackling loudly. It crashed against a distant tornado that seemed to eat it. The tornado glowed with flames, spinning about in glorious madness until both disasters were past.
“Maybe we should pay attention to why we’re here,” she said, her voice rushed.
“We’ve got time,” Angst said.
“You weren’t supposed to remember,” she said, refusing to make eye contact. “I didn’t know what else to do.”
“Right. Well, I do remember, now,” he said, crossing his arms. “Why are you always so angry? Why do you push me and pull me? One day we’re naked, the next day you’re screaming, and the next kissing me in my dreams.”
Tears dripped down her cheeks, and she held herself tightly.
“What do you want?” he asked.
“I want this, Angst,” she said in the mousiest of voices. She turned to him, moving forward into that personal space she’d stayed far away from for so long. He didn’t move back. “Ever since we met, I’ve wanted to go on adventures with you. I don’t want it to stop. I don’t want to be a princess anymore.”
“That’s all?” he asked.
“And I don’t want to share,” she said so quietly he almost didn’t hear her.
“Oh.” He didn’t know what else to say.
Their relationship at the castle had been fun. Not only because he absolutely adored her, not only because she needed him, but they’d been getting away with something. It was like a tiny adventure, so when she’d joined them on the road, the adventure had become that much more exciting. It made everyone upset at them, but Angst had been so wrapped up in that excitement, in that fun, that he’d missed the obvious.
He’d always been dumb when it came to women. He could flirt and woo and tease, but when it came to knowing what they actually wanted, he was smart like a rock. And Tori? How easy it was to forget that she was only nineteen. He should’ve figured it out when he woke up to find Tori naked in his bed, or when she blatantly did things to make him jealous. She wore her hair just how Angst liked it, and tiny outfits that showed off all his favorite curves. He’d been too dense to pick it up. Evidently, he need to be smacked across his face with a sign, because never once would Angst have imagined that Victoria had fallen in love with him.
He would’ve loved to adventure with Tori forever, side by side with his best friend, especially if they could’ve gone back to having fun. But he’d never leave Heather—even on the bad days, the worst ones, he wouldn’t even consider it. And that must’ve been the thought in his head, or the look on his face, when a tear trickled down her cheek.
“It’s the great things about dreams,” she said with a forced little laugh. “You can dream of all the stuff you want, even if it never happens.”
“Like kissing a princess?” he asked with a wink.
“You wouldn’t be the first one to dream of that,” she said with a familiar smile.
“And when the dream is over?” he asked.
“You’ll be a husband, and a dad, and my best friend,” she said, swallowing hard. “And I will try to be a good queen.”
“You’ll be an amazing queen,” he said. He looked up to see her wearing his favorite smile and nodding...and something else. Not anger, nor sadness, but a kind of satisfaction. Her eyes were resolved, as if the last puzzle piece had been set in place, and he wondered if that meant everything would be all right.
“It does mean that,” she said with a broad smile.
“About time!” he said with a grin. “Now, where is she?”
“Who?” Victoria asked.
“Aerella,” he said. “She needs to explain why we keep coming here over and over again. I’m sick of this dream!”
“Me too!” she agreed.
Stone monoliths shot from the ground. A roaring wind cut into the stone, tearing it into tiny bits that created a blinding sandstorm. Years of erosion happened within seconds as the stones became pebbles and the winds subsided. And then, it stopped.
Thunder came, not from storms or earthquakes, but from hordes of creatures charging to the center of the field. They met in a crash loud enough to make Angst’s teeth shake. It was a nightmare of destruction—Nordruaut killing Unsel soldiers, gamlin tearing through dragons, mages firing beams of light and fire at Berfemmian, Vex’steppe tribes battling Fulk’han, large mermen fighting cavastil birds.
They all fought each other. There weren’t teams or sides or alliances. It was an endless dog pile of death upon death, none safe from the person or creature beside them. The elements wait
ed like angry teachers, hovering over the field, arms crossed in high judgment. Angst looked around to see six watchers. He counted on his fingers then shook his head and counted again.
A gray man with scars on his arm and a giant Nordruaut with a long beard battled before them, blood flying through their ghostly image from a damaging swing.
“Angst, can we stop this? I think I’m going to be sick,” Victoria said, her face pale. “What are you counting?”
“I thought there were five elements here,” he said. “Earth, Fire, Air, Water, and Magic.” He pointed at each titan, ending at the tall beam of dark light.
“Right...” she said, her eyes followed his to the beam of white light shooting high up into the sky.
“Then what is that?” he asked.
The dark beam had moved to reach the white one, which flickered like a campfire. All heads turned to see it go out, followed closely by a blast that knocked everyone away. The ground shook so violently it began to blur, and the mountains shifted and flattened. There were screams of pain and a loud crunching of metal as the dream began fading out of existence before their eyes.
He looked at Tori.
“I swear, it isn’t me this time,” she said. “No kiss or anything!”
“What do we do?” Angst said fretfully. “Aerella’s not here to tell us!”
He could barely see Tori now, and he was sweating with the effort of keeping the vision alive.
“She doesn’t need to, Angst,” Victoria said. “We already saw it. The Fulk’han and the gray men were both there. This isn’t our past, Angst. This is our future!”
49
Nordruaut
Rasaol and Jarle stood over the bodies of two Nordruaut. Another man and a woman had been finely carved and served to the snow. Their blood and entrails were frozen, and any footprints were lost to wind and drifts. This meant that Guldrich was far ahead. How could one injured Fulk’han do so much damage? The Nordruaut were the hunters, they were larger by half a body, and he was missing an arm. Jarle looked at Rasaol in dismay.
“How many more do we need to lose?” Jarle prodded. “Is this not proof enough that this entire endeavor was a mistake?”
Angst Box Set 1 Page 113