by Ciara Knight
Ryder squatted next to me. “You all right?” He stroked my short hair from my face and smiled as he said, “Life’s never boring since you came round.” His touch made the world alright in spite of the ascension of hell raging over the territory.
“I’m glad I keep things interesting.” I returned his smile. “How’s Raeth?”
“Exhausted, she’s resting on the couch, everyone must be in the cellar waiting out the storm.” He brushed sand from my head and robes. Even my ears itched from small crystals scratching at my eardrums.
“How’s her leg? Will she be able to walk again?”
Ryder helped me up and we made our way to the living area. Raeth was already fast asleep. Our talk would have to wait, but for how long? I couldn’t keep our secret forever.
“She blasted the sand once the door shut behind you. She’s a mite weak now. Other than the sand we dragged in, there’s no Earth in here for her to drain energy from. She just needs sleep until we leave. Once outside she’ll be fine.”
“All these rules about our powers. It’s confusing.” I huffed. “Powers…seems so strange to say aloud. Just hours ago, it would have meant execution.” My heart ripped at the memory of Mother’s scowl. My gut twisted in knots and tears welled up in my eyes as I recalled her words. “Your father would be devastated to learn what you’ve become.”
Collapsing on a green cushioned chair near the couch, I grasped my stomach and fought back the urge to scream or laugh hysterically. Slowly, I noticed the scent of meat and potatoes wafting into the room and my stomach growled. At Ryder’s chuckle and Bendar’s snort, I knew they’d heard it over the wind outside.
“I fetch food. When done, we find ship to fly.” Bendar waddled toward two closed doors. They opened as he neared, then swooshed closed.
Ryder sat on the edge of the table, facing me. I tried to hide my tears. No one should ever see a princess cry. After all the years of conditioning, I thought I had my emotions under control. “Sorry.”
I looked away but he reached up and pulled my chin back around. “No need for apologies. It’s good you’re not the heartless Slag princess I believed you to be.”
I sat up straight as if the corset still circled my middle.
“The queen didn’t like emotion, I’m expecting.”
“No, it’s viewed as a sign of weakness. But I’m not weak.” I shot out of the chair only to have him pull me back down to face him. My hands betrayed me as they trembled in his. He’d held my hand so often today. These people seemed to always be touching one another. Hand holding, hugs, and kisses. Without thought, I touched my lips with my free hand and he smiled.
“That be your first—”
“No, of course not.” I lied. Well, not really.
“Yeah, who? When?” he challenged me.
“Back when I lived in the Resort Territory.”
“The boy, who was he?”
“A servant.” I laughed. “I didn’t know back then the line between servant and slave. My father caught us. Talk about awkward.”
“So, I wasn’t your first.”
The pain in his voice made me want to share the truth. The why defeated me. But since I’d been following my instincts ever since his rescue, I decided to continue. “Well, he kissed me, but it wasn’t like…that.” I could feel the heat rise to my cheeks. His hand gripped mine tighter. It didn’t make me uncomfortable as I’d expected. Also, the cool of his body was…pleasurable.
“Resort Territory, what’s it like?”
“Green, rich with color. Of course, I didn’t know how precious the land was at the time. I thought the whole planet looked like that. My father explained that it was the only area that had fresh lakes filled with fish which we ate. He said everything else was still too radioactive or the water was too dangerous to drink or swim in.”
Ryder leaned in closer. “I know you didn’t have a choice earlier, it was part of the cover, but now…” His mouth brushed across mine and the heat ran from my lips down my neck, through every inch of my body.
My back stiffened, my mind screamed for me to pull away, but when his lips pressed against mine, I didn’t move. His hand brushed my cheek and left a frosty trail behind. My body edged toward him, as if my heat craved his cold. I wanted more. The soothing calm that made all the madness disappear, if only for a few moments.
My body stayed rigid, frightened that if I moved the wrong way, I’d break our connection.
Pots and pans rattled in the nearby kitchen. Bendar would return soon. He leaned back and I blew frosty mist from my mouth. More…I want more. I reached up and ran my fingers through his hair to the back of his neck.
He shuddered under my touch. It felt powerful. I tugged his face to mine and kissed him. My toes curled and delicious shivers ran down my arms and legs. As our tongues brushed, I heard and felt our mouths sizzle and pop. Cold and heat melded and exploded. My body seemed to freeze and boil simultaneously.
He moved closer. When our bodies pressed together, a loud pop echoed in my head and we both flew across the room. I landed backward in the chair with my skin covered in hot prickles. Ryder lay on the floor next to the sofa. Raeth slept on. The flames in the fireplace shot up in tall streams, and the illuminator next to me exploded into shards.
One of the pieces sliced through my robe, cutting my right upper arm and cheek. We both remained on the floor gasping. My body reveled in the aftershocks. As I pulled myself together, I scanned the room. How had Raeth continued to sleep through the noise of Ryder’s and my life-altering kiss?
“I see you both have found the Art. Beware, opposites you two are, don’t go too fast. Flames and ice mix, but passion makes unstable.”
Ryder pushed himself upright. “What do you mean, little man?”
“Power core opposite in nature.”
My heart leapt, beating faster than the sand blasted outside the window. I rolled out from under the chair and righted it, and dusted off my robes, buying some time to gather my thoughts. Bendar stood there with a goofy grin. He knew more about my life than anyone else from all the times he’d watched over me from the vents on the ship. He’d bring me water and food when I was in confinement for disobeying an order, or a cool compress after a ‘training’ session.
Ryder settled back on the edge of the table. Neither of us spoke.
“Forgot forks and napkins.” Bendar scurried from the room.
Tingles still danced over the surface of my body. I looked down at the shattered illuminator. How could anything that pleasurable cause so much damage? Worse, I wanted more, even after the illuminator broke. We couldn’t do this again. It would draw attention or kill someone. Somehow, someway, I’d have to find my way back to the Resort Territory and stay far away from Ryder and Mother. Given that she hated it there, I might have a chance of surviving if I stayed in the old cabin I’d once shared with Father…and no one ever saw me.
Ryder pulled the sleeve of my robe open and touched the wound. I leaned back. “No, don’t. I won’t have you steal energy from someone else to mend a cut.”
His eyes dropped to the floor. “Just going to take a look and clean the wound. It’s not deep, won’t be needing stitches. Besides, I don’t always have to steal energy. Can use my own for small stuff.”
My heart ached at the sight of how much pain I’d just caused him. His dark eyes showed the anguish of taking lives to use his powers. I grabbed his hand. “I’m sorry. It’s just that—”
A surge radiated between us, as if our bodies knew what they could have and demanded it freely. The tools resting on the side of the fireplace clanked against each other.
He freed his hand from mine.
We sat motionless for a moment, his golden eyes pleading with my soul to let him in. I wanted to lose myself in them forever. Leave all this craziness behind.
My chest constricted at the thought of us never touching again. We couldn’t. I didn’t think I could stop next time.
Raeth stirred. “Wh-what’s going on?”
The doors swished again and Bendar dropped some white cloth napkins on the table. He pulled a wooden box up and sat. “Not much time before storm ends. Eat.”
Raeth staggered to her feet and limped to the table, dragging a chair behind her. She grabbed a fork and pierced a roasted potato. Her gaze flitted about the room. “I h-hope Uncle’s okay.”
Initially, the heat of pepper-coated meat burned my tongue. After a few mouthfuls, I sighed. It reminded me of home and Father. This was the first time since his death I’d eaten anything with flavor. On the ship I’d eaten a pot of yellow mush that tasted like steel for the past few weeks.
I bit back a smile as my stomach settled for the first time in days. I took a sip of my drink and almost choked. “What is that?”
Ryder smiled. “Just some wine.”
“It’s…strong.”
“Actually, it’s watered down. Not great quality, but it will help give us strength. Water is way too expensive here.”
Raeth took a drink from her cup. “Th-the w-wine makes th-the water taste better. If n-not, it t-tastes like chemicals.”
I took another sip, this time prepared for the strong acidic flavor. It slid down my throat with a sting, but warmed my belly. My lips and fingers tingled after half a glass. I cupped my mouth, trying to stifle a rogue giggle.
“Ah, I think you’ve had enough.” Ryder took the glass from my lips. Berry flavors lingered in my mouth and my head felt light and happy.
“But it’s good. I’d like more please.”
At my hiccups, they laughed.
“Princess find restraint.” Bendar’s belly shook up and down several times as he chuckled and looked at Ryder. “Yes, restraint something you both must use, but can manage with caution.”
I redirected my attention to the food in front of me. Bendar didn’t realize what he was urging me into. My body quivered with the thought of Ryder’s mouth on mine, and another illuminator popped but didn’t explode.
Ryder pressed his lips together and his cheek muscles flexed and tightened in an attempt not to laugh.
Great, now I was a joke. “So I’ve never been kissed. Who cares?”
Raeth cleared her throat and averted her gaze.
Ryder pointed at the vibrating muted white box on the other wall. “Yes, I can see that.”
“It’s just my powers freaking out on me again.”
Ryder chuckled. “Yeah, and what be the catalyst? No one’s ‘round threatening you. Admit it, you want—”
“To get out of here.” I jumped up, knocking half the food to the floor. “Sorry, it’s just that…oh, never mind.” What was the point in trying to explain, no one understood me anyway.
Bendar scurried around to clean up the food.
I scooped some potatoes back onto a plate. “Stop, you’re not my servant anymore. You don’t have to clean up my mess or pretend to care about me.”
“Pretend? Semara thinks I only stayed to fix you drinks? I am friend and more.” Bendar took the dishes to the kitchen, his head bowed.
“Don’t know how I feel about you, but I reckon that man loves you and would do anything to protect you.” Ryder picked up the remaining mess and went to the kitchen.
Standing by the window, I looked through the murky glass. What gave Ryder the right to scold me? It wasn’t like I was a child. I was maybe only a couple years younger than him. Just because I didn’t have the experience he did, didn’t make me a fool. Still, the way Bendar had looked at me broke my heart. He was the one good thing in my life over the past four years. He deserved more than a pouting, childish princess lashing out because she was frightened.
When Bendar entered the room, I knelt before him, my arms wrapping around his shoulders. “I’m sorry, Bendar. There’s no excuse for what I said. I know you’re my friend, my best friend ever and the one person in this world who only wants what’s best for me.” My gaze slid to Raeth and back to him. “I shouldn’t have let my fear rule me.”
He patted my cheek and nodded. With a smile, he walked to the stairs, grabbed the handrail, and hoisted himself up. “To your room.”
I looked between Raeth and Ryder. “Shouldn’t we get out of here and go for the ship?”
Ryder shuffled to the stairs. “Empty that head of yours about leaving tonight. Sermechtapedes will devour you in seconds. Never no mind about the spiderats with their black as night wings. One bite’ll kill you.”
“And what about scavengers. They roam the Wasteland during daylight hours. I know my mother avoids them. If the queen’s ship can be overpowered, we won’t stand a chance.”
Ryder paused at the top. “Don’t rightly know about scavengers. We don’t see much of them. They mostly scour for metal from what I hear. We ain’t got no metal. Must take things how they come. First, rest. We’ll need it before tromping up them sandy hills. You’ve never walked up one of those, have you?”
I followed close behind, helping Raeth with the first couple steps. “No, I’ve only been to this territory once before. You’ve been outside the field?”
“Once.” Ryder glanced down at Raeth’s leg and I decided not to pry any further. Not now, not until I could speak to Raeth alone.
“But why are these sermechtapedes so dangerous at night?”
“Because they retract their million legs into their hefty bodies and plunge through the sand to attack from below. If on the surface at night their owl-eyes let them see great distances. So when you hear their eerie clicks, you don’t rightly know if it’s the eyes or the feet shooting out at the surface. Do you aim up, or down? And the spiderats use their bat-like sense to bounce sound off objects to find ya, the bird wings allow them to fly fast and dive bomb without warning, and before you draw your gun, you’re caught in its web.”
I shivered. So many creatures to learn about and so little time. “Where did all these creatures come from?”
“Some Neumarians developed them to help catch fly-ships and steam trains during the war, others the queen created to keep us all imprisoned in the territories working for her.” He shrugged. “There’re lots out there.”
Bendar opened the door to a simple room with three twin beds, a desk and chair. It appeared homey with the white wood panel walls and dark brown rug on the floor.
Raeth collapsed onto a bed. “I know it isn’t w-what your used to, b-but—”
“It’s far better than what I’m used to, thanks.” I didn’t want to talk about it, but I was sick of everyone believing I lived a pampered life. If you could call the multiple trips a week to the medic and social isolation a dream life, then yeah, I’d lived like a true princess.
We all sat in silence, listening to the people stirring below. Bendar left without a word. With a full belly for the first time since Father’s death, I longed to sleep on a real mattress. Finally, an end to my sixteenth birthday and we were all alive. Maybe tomorrow, no one else would have to die.
I removed the robe and collapsed on the bed. My short silver hair dusted my shoulders. The only amenity I wished to have from the ship was a sand blaster or steam shower. Every time I closed my mouth, the grit crunched between my teeth.
My eyes slid shut and dreams of happier times brought me comfort, but not for long. Pleasant memories morphed into familiar dark nightmares.
“Raeth. Don’t die. Please.” My words echoed in the dark engine room.
Raeth’s tiny, frail hand lifted to me. I took it and wiped blood from her forehead where the neuro-alterer had been drilled into her skull. “It’s better if I die. No more torture.”
My chest constricted with grief. How could I sit and watch her die? The stench of infection told of a long, gruesome death. This young girl who’d been tortured for days coughed and grasped at my hand. I couldn’t bear watching.
My insides fluttered as the ship descended.
Voices, guards, bay door opening.
Raeth, on the edge of death, begged for me to end her life. No, no more suffering, please. I couldn’t watch.
&
nbsp; Guards stormed in. “Why hasn’t she been incinerated?”
Bendar waved his arms. “No, better to leave in sand. Queen not happy if engine breaks.”
“Fine.” The guard stepped toward us. If Raeth was found alive, the torture would begin again, and I’d be punished. I looked to Bendar, and I knew he saw my betrayal. I’d promised to help Raeth. To get her home. Now I only wanted her to disappear.
The guard punted Raeth’s small body down the gangway. Her limbs flopped in all directions as her body rolled onto the sand. I wanted to cry out, cradle Raeth to me, and demand medicine to heal her, but knew I couldn’t.
As I looked down at her, I realized Raeth was dead and was now no more than food left for the Sermechtapedes. That I was relieved filled me with shame.
Screams echoed up my throat and I bolted upright. Strong arms encircled me. My body was convulsing with the memory of my cowardice. Did Raeth not remember what I did or didn’t do? Had she romanticized our friendship? We were only children, barely twelve-years-old, and thrust together in impossible circumstances.
In the end, I’d let her down. I’d put myself first. I’d saved myself at her expense.
“Shh…it’s okay. Just a dream.” Ryder’s cool breath soothed my burning skin.
This was wrong. All wrong on so many levels. I didn’t deserve his comfort. I’d betrayed his sister and left her to die alone in the Wasteland. And when he discovered the truth, nothing would stop him from sucking the life out of me.
And I would deserve it.
Chapter Eight
Pressing my palms against Ryder’s solid chest, I shoved him away. “I’m fine. I don’t need your help.” My arms shook uncontrollably.
Ryder reached out but I backed away. His eyebrows arched and he opened his mouth, but I was saved by several loud knocks at the door and leapt from the bed. Fire slid down the back of my throat, my ribs constricted, and I blew out steam.