by S. M. West
His strong hands hoist me up and around to face him, and my surprised laughter floats between us. The tension in his body vanishes when he realizes I’m not upset at all.
“Perhaps we should put your mouth to good use,” I tease, my finger lightly tracing his full, sexy lips.
With a nip at my fingers, his wet tongue wraps around my digits and pulls them into his mouth, only serving to stoke the formidable desire within my core.
“My pleasure.” His smooth, sultry voice sends shivers down my spine.
Tossing me onto the bed, he peels away my clothes, taking my underwear with my shorts, and with a flick of the wrist, my bra is discarded too.
His hot mouth covers my sex, his tongue, oh my, his tongue licks and sucks voraciously. His mouth is positioned for the best suction and deepest penetration with his tongue alternating between thrusting into me and lapping at my clit.
“Fuck, Silas.”
Clutching his hair, I whimper and moan for him, for more, for this to never end. All I want to do is grind against his face, but his hold is strong, guiding me where he wants me.
Heat prickles along my chest and neck as my release builds to a roaring bonfire. The flames are rising, licking, and threatening to consume us both.
He’s rough and unapologetic in how greedily he feasts on me. It’s both breath-stealing and mind-blowing.
“No, don’t stop…. Stop… Fuck.”
If I weren’t on the receiving end of this glorious act, I’d think he was enjoying this more than me by his sounds of pleasure vibrating through my sex. His lips latch onto my clit, sucking on my bundle of nerves, and I’m barely hanging on.
My fingers twist in his hair, and just when I think that I can’t take any more, he inserts one finger, then another, pumping into me. With a final thrust, he pushes me over the edge into oblivion, and I shatter into a million fragments of bliss.
Pansy’s gone when I wake up the next morning. She had the opening shift at Betty’s. Once showered and shaved, I find Daisy in the kitchen, sitting at the table with Boy at her feet.
“Morning,” she says. “Do you mind giving me a ride to Pansy’s?”
“No problem. I’m leaving in about twenty if you need to put your things together.”
“I’m ready, and I even had time for a dip in the pool. I love it here.”
Sipping at my hot coffee, I grin. I could take the bait and team up to get Pansy here, but I won’t. As much as Daisy is growing on me, she’s also always looking out for number one.
“You’re welcome to stay any time Pansy is here.”
“What about if she wasn’t?”
“Come again?” My tone has a hard edge to it, worried she’s insinuating something else although she’s not trying to be flirty.
“You don’t know, do you?” She stands and slips her sunglasses on as she gathers her bag from the table.
“What don’t I know?” Apprehension slithers up my spine and coils in my belly.
“She asked me not to tell you and I shouldn’t, but you have a right to know.”
“Know what?” I’m losing patience with her cat and mouse game.
Daisy stares at me behind her aviator glasses, and while I can’t see her eyes, I can feel her glower on me. I’m not an egomaniac, but she can’t stand that her sister is with someone famous and she takes that shit out on me. I’m good with that. I’d rather it be me than Pansy. I can take it, and I don’t care -- as long as she’s good to Pansy, she and I are good.
“Pansy was invited on Vinny’s research assignment.” I nod and Daisy cocks her head, wearing a quizzical expression. “If you know, why haven’t you said anything to her?”
“I’m waiting for her to tell me. It’s her news.”
“And?” Her light eyebrows peak over the tops of her glasses.
“And what?” I’m confused.
“What are you going to say? She’ll be away for about six months, if not more, and she doesn’t want to leave us. That’s what is holding her back from making a decision. I’ve told her that she should go. We’ll be fine, but she won’t listen.”
That familiar knot forms in my stomach at the thought of her absence, and it multiplies at the idea of her passing up a once in a lifetime opportunity. I’ve been waiting for her to mention it to me, and I’m perplexed at why she hasn’t, as well as annoyed that she might not go.
“She’ll tell me, soon, I’m sure. And I will support her decision to go.”
“Thank you. I knew you’d be supportive.”
“You did?” I eye her skeptically.
With a huff, she lifts her glasses to look me in the eye. “Silas, I may give you a hard time, but I know you love my sister.”
After dropping Daisy off, I head to Dr. Wexford for my appointment before the studio.
“Silas, I must say, I’m impressed with the progress you’ve made in such a short time,” says Dr. Wexford.
She sits casually, legs crossed as usual with a cup of tea clasped in her hands. Today her long hair is back in a tight, neat bun, but she’s in her usual free-flowing skirt.
I’ve been seeing her weekly and completed every homework assignment she’s given me, even the brutal ones. The ones where I’d rather climb Mt. Everest barefoot, but it means going deep and facing the truth, or my flaws or faults.
To date, the hardest was writing down what I’d say to my parents. I mean, really say. The truth, no holds barred. I hope I never have to say it to them because it will likely be the end of our relationship if I do.
“Thanks. Yeah, this time is different.”
“Different how?” she asks.
“Pansy.”
She crinkles her brow and twists her mouth in contemplation. “How so?”
“Before you go thinking that I’m doing this for Pansy, I’m not. It’s for me. What I mean is, she grounds me.”
Her face relaxes, then she sips her tea and nods. “Go on.”
Normally, her prompting me to open myself up more, bare all my inner thoughts and fears, would have me clenching my jaw and keeping silent. Or I might make some sarcastic quip, but this time, none of that even crosses my mind.
“It’s hard to explain. I suppose she’s shown me, or maybe just reminded me how good relationships can be. How it doesn’t have to be hard or contentious and if it isn’t easy or natural, then maybe a change is needed.”
“I’m glad to hear this, Silas. It sounds like you’ve given this a lot of thought. So, what’s bothering you?”
I don’t know how she does it, but she has this uncanny ability to get to the heart of the matter every time.
“Pansy has a huge opportunity that will bring her closer to her dream, and she hasn’t told me about it. I mean, she will tell me…I hope she will.” I choke on the words, vulnerable in sharing my doubts.
“Do you know why she hasn’t said anything?”
“I think it’s because it’d mean we’d be apart for about six months. And her sister is pregnant with no father in the picture. Pansy’s a nurturer, and I doubt she could easily leave us if she thinks we need her.”
“And do you?”
“Need her?” I ask, and the doctor nods. With a hard swallow, I nod. “Yeah, I do. But I won’t be the reason she doesn’t go. It’s only temporary, and no matter what, I’ll make her see that she must go.”
***
A crowded LAX is nothing unusual, as we navigate our way through the people to the luggage drop off. Daisy is leaving for her modeling gig, and neither Pansy nor I have mentioned Vinny’s trip. We’ll be doing this soon enough, except it’ll be Pansy leaving. If, or when, she tells me about it. It’s a waiting game, although I don’t think Pansy knows she’s playing it.
I want to say something, but the selfish part of me wants to believe, to see if she will tell me. I fear if she doesn’t say anything, then it means she doesn’t have as much confidence in us as I do, or that she’s already made her mind up without talking to me about it.
“Here’s the
last of it.” I deposit Daisy’s third and final suitcase on the conveyor belt. “Do you think you have enough?” My sarcastic remark matches Daisy’s eye roll, and Pansy laughs.
“Whatevs,” she says, dismissing me with a hand wave. “So, this is it.”
Daisy turns to face Pansy, and her eyes shimmer with unshed tears. She quickly looks to the left, then the right, at all the activity going on in the airport.
“Have fun, but take it easy. Listen to your body and if you’re tired, don’t push it.” Pansy sounds concerned and loving.
“All right, Mom.” Daisy pulls her in for a long, hard hug.
“Remember. You’re not alone in this. I’m here and only a phone call away,” Pansy reminds her.
“We’re here,” I add, slipping my hand in Pansy’s and squeezing.
“Guys, I’m going to miss you, but I’m also going to enjoy this final modeling gig. I didn’t get to enjoy my last catwalk. At the time, I had no clue it was going to be my last.”
“It might not be. If modeling is a dream, don’t give up,” Pansy says.
“Nah, my dreams are changing.”
“Daze, be good and take care of yourself. If you need anything, call,” I say.
The sisters hug one last time, and Daisy nods, a watery smile on her face, before turning her back to us. We stand hand-in-hand as she disappears through the doors to customs.
With my arms around Pansy, we head to the car. “You okay?”
“Yeah. It’s odd timing and strange to say, but I feel like I’ve found my sister. That I have back part of my family. Here she is leaving, and I feel closer to her than I ever have before.”
“I get it. You two have made a lot of headway in a short amount of time.”
“I’ll miss her, but she’ll be fine, and when she gets back, she’ll be thrilled to see where we’re living.”
At first, her words don’t sink in, but when they do, I stumble over my feet and stop. “Where are you living?” I ask, needing to clarify before I jump to conclusions.
Her lips faintly curve up, her eyes sparkling. “With you.”
My lips split into a smile as I lift her into the air. “Hallelujah!”
She squeals digging her fingers into my shoulders while I twirl her around. Her moving in will be short-lived because she’ll be leaving soon, but she’s coming back to me. To my place, our home.
“I’m glad you like that idea considering I didn’t ask.”
“Babe, you never have to ask. If I’d had it my way, you’d never have moved out.”
I reluctantly loosen my grip, and her body slides down mine. I stop her descent as our lips line up, and I lean in to kiss her.
The drive back is glorious. The top is down on my convertible, and the thought of her moving in has me appreciating the shining sun, blue skies, and the warm, salty wind throwing her hair around. We talk about how quickly she can bring her stuff to my place, and I’ll arrange for the little furniture she has to go in storage. I want to do it now, steal as many minutes as I can with her, but she shuts the idea down.
“I can’t move in tonight; we have the record label party.”
I groan. “Fine. You sure you don’t want to skip it?”
“No way!”
“Can’t blame me for trying. I’ve got something to tell you, too.” I squeeze her knee and rest my hand on her bare thigh. Realizing I haven’t told her everything either, and if I disclose, she may too.
I pull her hair out of her face, and a small smile plays at the corner of her lips. “What? It sounds intriguing and ominous.”
“Nothing ominous. I wanted to tell you sooner, but I just never knew how to bring it up.”
“Tell me. The suspense is killing me.”
I chuckle, glancing at her, looking back at me. Her eyes shine, a smile playing on her lips, and her cheeks rosy.
“I’m seeing my therapist again about my anger, and it’s going well. This time is better.” It feels good to confide in her.
“Silas, that’s amazing!” Leaning over the console, she kisses me on the cheek. “I’m so glad you’re going and that you’re feeling good about it.”
“Yeah. I’m seeing the same doctor I saw before the tour.”
“I don’t want to push, and only tell me what you’re comfortable talking about…what prompted you to go back?”
“My parents showing up.”
Admitting it is both relieving and difficult. Pansy and I have talked about my parents, but it’s still not something I like to do. She never pushes or brings them up.
“And it’s helping?”
“Yeah. She’s helping me deal with the helplessness before it gets to anger.” I glance away from the road and her. I can’t help but feel weak at my admission.
“Hey.” Her hand rests on my shoulder, and I turn back to the road. “I get it, and it’s normal to feel that way. They’re your parents.”
I realize my mistake when she slips into silence. With her forehead wrinkled and her twisting her lips, she is deep in thought, and I wonder if revealing my true feelings about the root of my anger pushed her to stay?
The ride to the damn record label party is too short. Before I know it, we’re here. First Bianca climbs out of the car, and then the guys and Pansy. People spill out of the large white double doors at the front of the house, onto the lawn. The music is loud. As we make our way inside, it is just as busy as outside, with every room almost shoulder-to-shoulder with people laughing, dancing, and talking.
And there’s a shit-ton of booze, among other recreational drugs. None of it is good for Jared. He’s gotten himself into trouble one too many times at shindigs like this, and we made him promise to go easy on the liquor, but who knows if he will.
Since we’ve been writing and recording the album, he’s been trying to cut back on the shit and clean up his act. And while he has the best of intentions, we need to keep an eye on him. The man has no willpower. Tonight, Gray drew the short straw, and he’s Jared’s shadow.
With Jared covered, I tried to talk Pansy into not going. I promised to make it worth her while, we’d make out all night long, but she wouldn’t budge.
She wanted to show off her smoking hot dress, and hot damn, smoking it is. My cock has been rock hard since my first glimpse of her in the elegant magenta shift dress.
The dress falls to mid-thigh with a low V neck and long bell sleeves. She’s stunning with her silky hair, glowing skin, and the blinding brilliance of her hazel eyes.
And her four-inch black heels make her legs run on forever. Sexy legs I can’t wait to have wrapped around my face. With that, I try again to persuade her to leave.
“How long do we have to stay?” I whisper, taking the opportunity to lick the shell of her ear.
With a shudder, her fingers dig into the arm of my suit as she releases my name like a breathy moan.
“Don’t do that again.”
“Why not? Don’t tell me you don’t like it.”
“That’s the problem. I like it too much. I think I just came.”
My eyes smolder, my grip tightening on her hip as my fingers dance along the swell of her ass.
“Fuck, you can’t say things like that and expect me not to want to fuck you right here in front of all these people.”
“Silas!” Her eyes widen, pupils dilating, lips turned up, and cheeks pink. “Stop it, or else I might just let you.”
I groan, ready to haul her into the nearest closet and fuck her senseless when we’re interrupted.
“Silas, good to see you!” Gerald Pilsen, an executive with the record company, slaps my shoulder. “And who is this vision of loveliness?”
“Gerald, this is Pansy Dobson, and Pansy, this is Gerald Pilsen.”
“Pleasure to meet you, Ms. Dobson,” Gerald says, and then proceeds to show how much of a blowhard he is by rattling off his title and career history like it’s proof that he has a gigantic cock.
“And you,” Pansy says, shaking his hand.
“W
hat are you doing with this bum? You like rock stars, do you?” Not waiting for her response, obviously on a roll and oblivious to how uncomfortable he’s making her, he continues, “If you tire of him, come find me. I’ll rock your world.”
Stepping partially in front of Pansy, I glare at Gerald. “That’s enough, buddy. Go find your own date; she’s with me.”
“Ah, relax, we’re just having fun. Is she going on tour with you or is she just pussy of the day?”
“Excuse me?” I scowl, clenching my fists to stop myself from hitting him.
Pansy steps closer to me and narrows her eyes at him. I’ve never liked this guy, and I’m especially grateful that my days of having to deal with him are numbered.
“I want to know if I can look her up when you’re on the road. How serious is it?”
I raise my arm, and Pansy’s fingers dig into my shoulders, prepared to hold me back should I want to kill this guy. Her touch pulls me from crossing that line into the darkness of my anger.
Rather than take him out, as tempting as it is, I focus on his puzzling comment.
“Tour? What are you talking about?”
“Trojan’s farewell tour.”
“Gerald, I told you not to say anything,” Bianca says as she joins the conversation.
“There’s not going to be a tour,” I grit out. “It’s not part of the deal.”
Bianca lays a hand on my forearm and wedges herself between Gerald and me. “Would you please give us a moment?” She directs the question at him.
“Fine, but this isn’t over. Not by a long shot.” His cocksure attitude is hard to miss. Glancing at me, he adds, “There will be a tour.”
“No fucking way.”
The asshole chuckles while walking away.
“Bianca, what the fuck?”
“Silas.” Pansy’s hold tightens.
“I’m sorry. He called this morning about doing a world tour. I’d told him it was likely a no-go, but you know how the label is.”
“There is no likely, Bianca. It’s a no,” I reiterate. “Don’t even try to talk us into that shit. Vegas was my last stop. Never again.”
Holding her hands up in surrender, she sheepishly stares at us. “Fine. I’ll shut it down. You two have a good night.”