Stevie sitting at that table—she was the most stunning woman I’d ever seen.
Her husband’s shrewd eyes judged me as he asked her, “Since when do you watch hockey?” He took stock of my six-foot-one, two-hundred-plus-pound frame, my lean muscle, my easy-going smile, my ink. I was his polar opposite with his clean cut, starched shirt. If everything Stevie had told me was true about him, he wouldn’t know I was more her type than he was. Then again, Ben had known her for almost half of their lives, and I was just some punk jock who’d stolen a moment, and it would appear he was a lot smarter than she gave him credit for. I’d jumped the gun. I should’ve never stepped foot at this table.
She shook her head. Her eyes on mine. Her mouth opening and then closing, unable to give him an answer.
I jumped in and saved her. “No, if I remember correctly you didn’t even know Tampa had a hockey team,” I said with a smirk and my blood thrummed as she blushed.
Her friends laughed, but it was Alec who chimed in, his star-struck eyes fully exposed. “Now that you’ve moved back, we’ll have to catch a game.”
“You moved back?” I asked without tamping down my enthusiasm. Unfortunately, her husband keyed into that, too.
Ben’s voice pitched an octave higher as he asked, “How do you guys know each other?”
“Last year, when I came to visit.” She spoke softly only for him and that quiet tension became a loud thunder.
“I hit on her friend, shit, what was her name?” The lie felt wrong, but I had the urge to protect our short amount of time together. It was ours and nothing had happened. No point in putting her in front of the firing squad.
“Reagan?” Ben smiled and his shoulders relaxed.
“Yeah, her. She blew me off,” I joked, but Stevie’s stare held the truth of that night and it nearly knocked me on my ass. All that desire, it was still there in her eyes.
“This is surreal. I’m a huge fan.” Alec’s friend finally spoke up.
I held out my hand trying to regain some footing and my manners. “If I have everyone’s names correct, it’s Ben, Alec, and—”
“Oh, sorry.” Stevie’s confidence thrilled me as she straightened her spine and commanded the table’s attention. “This is my new boss, Trenton—”
“Just Trent.” He held out his hand and I shook it. “Trenton sounds—”
“Pompous,” Alec’s jab made Trent chuckle.
I offered my hand to Alec next and he took his turn.
“I have to admit, I’m not a huge hockey fan, but it’s cool as hell to meet you.” Alec’s grip was firmer than I figured it to be. “Grab a seat, you should join us, have a beer—”
“I was actually about to take off, early morning practice, but I wanted to say hi to Stevie.”
She glanced up at me from under her lashes. We were stuck inside that bubble from a year ago. The electricity she fed me through that one look was enough to tell me if we had our chance, I’d never get her out of my fucking system. Her husband’s arm no longer lingered across the back of her chair. His attention not as pin-point after my little fib. I didn’t miss that he never offered me his hand, though. Maybe he wasn’t that gullible after all.
“You have to leave?” she asked, and I internally cheered at her disappointment.
I rubbed the back of my neck. “I do. It was good to see you, though.” I wasn’t sure if that was true. My temptation, in the same city, and fucking married.
“It really was.” Her smile felt private, and God, I needed to touch her face, her cheeks were burning and I wanted to see if they felt warm. My fingers twitched so I slid them into my pockets. She took the last sip of her wine and pushed back from the table, her chair grating against the floor. “I’m going to grab another glass.”
“I can—”
“I got it, Ben.” Her tone lost the soft edge it’d held for me. “Walk with me?”
I shrugged despite my rising surprise. “Sure.”
I gave the guys a wave and a nice to meet you, ignoring the way Ben ignored me.
Stevie led me to the front of the bar and I followed behind, loving the way her hips swayed in her form-fitting skirt. My fantasy of her behind a desk played loud and clear in my head. I had to snap the hell out of it. This chick was married. Unavailable. Unobtainable.
She stopped abruptly and turned to face me once we were no longer in the line of sight of her table. She was breathing fast and the flush in her cheeks bled into her lips. “You’re a professional hockey player?”
“Does it matter?”
“Yes!” Her tone was petulant and kind of cute.
“Why?” My lips broke into a playful grin as I toyed with a few stray pieces of her hair. It was stupid, but I had to touch her, it might be the only time I’d ever have the chance to again. “You don’t even like hockey.” She bit her lip, and I let the strands of her hair slide from between my thumb and forefinger. I expelled a long breath, a wakeup call, and slipped my hands back into my pockets.
“I dumped my life in your lap, Mark.” My name sounded way too good on her tongue. “I feel stupid that I didn’t—”
“You needed to vent and it was nice not having to deal with the whole—”
“I’m a famous person thing.”
I chuckled. “Yeah. It can be a pain in the ass.”
She puffed out a nervous laugh. “I guess it could be.”
My smile fell as the laughter from her table drifted over to where we were standing, reminding me we were not alone. “You guys worked things out? Moved back?”
“No.” Her eyes were filled with something I couldn’t read. The blue burst was alive when she said, “We got divorced.” Divorced. The word was that first drop of water after an hour on the treadmill. Relief. And I felt terrible for thinking that way. “We’ve literally been in town for four days, he’s only here because I needed help moving. He convinced Trenton to hire me on temporarily until I can find another firm to work for, or prove I know what I’m doing.”
“How long?”
“Have we been separated?” She dropped her eyes to the floor. “About a month after I met you, actually. Divorce was finalized three months ago.”
My body gravitated toward hers. “Are you okay with everything?”
“It’s been a long year.” Her smile was sad, but as she raised her head, her eyes shimmered. “I’m happier than I was, that’s a good thing. I’m finding my way. Stevie West rises again.” Her laugh was sweet and I wanted to taste it.
Stevie West.
She was finding new ground, and I should let her be, but I took another step closer. “Nothing to hold you back?” I handed her the same words from a year ago and she laughed.
“I guess not.”
“I want to call you.”
“You do?” She sucked in an anxious breath.
I nodded, keeping my cool when all I wanted to do was say, fuck yeah. “I’m leaving in a couple days. We have three road games but I’ll be back next Friday and I want to see you.”
I’d only met her once, spent one night getting to know her, and now she was free to get to know me. Hell if I didn’t want that more than the win we’d lost tonight. It could’ve been that my bed had been cold more often than not these days. The start of the season made it difficult to have a personal life. It also made it hard to avoid my ex, and generally put me in a fuck-off kind of mood. My apartment, my bed, was an inhospitable environment. But Stevie, with those lips I wanted to touch, and hips I wanted to lose myself in… yeah, for her, I’d make an exception.
She hesitated, and I waited as the beat of her pulse became visible in the slight crook of her neck. She stepped back an inch giving herself room to breathe. The physical pull we shared was something I hadn’t encountered with anyone else, and I was glad that it hadn’t been there only because she’d been off limits. Stevie wet her lips, and the sexy curve of her mouth sent a jolt of anticipation down my spine as she smiled and said, “I think I’d really like to see you, too.”
&nb
sp; Spinning.
It was the only word that came to mind as I watched Mark walk out of the bar. My body was a puddle, my cheeks burning, my knees were actually weak. There was about a pound of cotton in my head. I hadn’t been back in the city for more than four days, and I’d run into the one man I hadn’t stopped thinking about since last year. I had to pull myself together before I went back to the table. I took a few deep breaths and lifted the hair off my neck, letting the cool air kiss my skin. A shiver had goose bumps rising across the surface of my neck and arms as I remembered what it felt like to have him touch me, to have Mark’s hand on my cheek. His touch was a breath and I needed to inhale it. It was the argument happening a few feet away at another table, college guys adamantly debating how Tampa’s loss could’ve been worse if it hadn’t been for Carmelo’s goal that brought everything back into perspective. He was a professional athlete. A hockey player. What planet was I on?
Over the last year, Mark, and our almost affair, had never left the recesses of my mind. I’d realized so much about myself that night. Mostly, that I was done being married to Ben. I’d fallen out of love with him, and I hadn’t been able to hide from myself anymore. I’d wanted Mark’s mouth on me, his hands in my hair. I wanted more. I’d wanted to say yes when he asked me to come up to his apartment. That desire, if I had been a truly happily married woman, would have never surfaced like it had. I’d been engulfed in a dangerous flame. If my marriage had been solid, I would’ve never dreamed of even saying more than hello. Mark’s imprint never faded and that was the most telling thing of all. My moment of clarity. I told Ben I wanted a divorce the minute I’d walked through the doors after my trip.
One month later, I’d moved out of our house and into a small one-bedroom apartment. It was weird being on my own. I’d become a single dish cookbook. A shopping for one grocery list. There were times when I had to remind myself not to buy his favorite deodorant, or that chocolate almond milk he liked. It was lonely, and we’d already been separated for a few months when Ben had finally decided he might want to fight for me. I had to remind myself it was too little, too late. Ben had been my best friend for so long, but he’d turned into a roommate with benefits, and after a while, a silent partner. Ben thought he could pick and choose when he wanted to “need me” but I had already moved on.
I ordered a glass of wine from the bartender and closed out my tab before I made my way back to the table. The guys were all smiling and laughing as I approached.
“What did I miss?” I asked as I slipped onto my chair.
Trenton’s grin was infectious. “I was just telling Ben about this morning.”
My face heated all over again. “Oh my God, that was so embarrassing.”
“How did you not know Trent was gay?” Ben asked through a laugh and it kind of irritated me.
How would I have known? Ben’s friends were his friends. I couldn’t blame Ben completely. It had been my choice to blend too seamlessly into his side of our “us.” I’d depended on him and he liked it, and to my recent chagrin, I’d needed to depend on him one last time. At least for a little while. Our relationship had become very precarious. Almost parasitic. Without his recommendations, I would basically look like a glorified secretary. The firm he owned with his friend in Richmond was just that, his firm. I hardly ever had the opportunity to take on accounts, falling more into an assistant role. Trent, another connection he’d made in college, was nice enough to hire me on Ben’s recommendation. In charge of the smaller accounts until I could build a better resume, until I could prove myself, I was stuck. I was smart, had my degree, and I knew what I was doing, but on paper, I looked like a new grad. Ben was being the good guy that he always was by asking his friend to help me. Most men would’ve signed the divorce papers and said, “see ya.”
“I just met him. It was a little bit of a shock. I’d have been the same way if he was making out with a woman in his office. I’m not used to interoffice shenanigans.” I meant it to be playful, but Ben’s smile fell enough that I noticed.
I’d always teased him about having sex at the office. Totally unprofessional. His words, not mine.
“My boyfriend thinks you’re adorable.” Trent raised his glass and I did, as well. Leaving Ben’s mood change behind. “Welcome to Byron & Elm.”
There was a small chorus of cheers and I smiled. They may be Ben’s friends, but they were making me theirs, guiding me to the ledge of freedom, and I was so ready to jump.
“I can’t believe you know Mark Carmelo,” Alec said, bringing my mind right to where it shouldn’t. Sitting this close to Ben, he’d read me like an open book if he hadn’t already. It didn’t matter. We were divorced. But I never wanted to hurt him.
“I wouldn’t say I—”
“I guess the gay rumors were false?” Trent raised his eyebrows.
“I wouldn’t know.” I sipped from my glass a little too deeply and his keen eyes assessed me. I cleared my throat. “There were gay rumors?”
“He had a terrible break-up a few years ago. One of his teammates was banging his girl. Media spun it like she was a prop to cover that he was gay. Hasn’t been spotted with a chick in a while, I guess.” Alec’s depiction sounded like a tabloid article.
I rolled my eyes. “Why do they even care?”
Alec’s laugh was incredulous. “Because most of those guys are fucking a new chick every night. He’s either really good at keeping things private or…”
“Or he’s gay?” I snorted, trying my best to ignore the “new chick every night” statement. “Has he been spotted with a man?” That shut him up. “I didn’t think so. Maybe he’s not a man whore. Gay or not.”
“He used to be, that’s for sure. When he first got drafted.”
Trent shoved Alec’s shoulder. “For someone who isn’t a huge fan, you sure do know a lot about him.”
“I was trying to play it cool, man. He’s one of the top fucking centers in the league.”
“Tell me something I don’t know.”
Top center. I had no idea what that meant, but it sounded important. And now I wanted to throw up. I liked it better when he was just Mark and I’d almost kissed him. Now he was real, and had my number, and he was famous. My heart was doing this weird fish-out-of-water flop. The swarm stirring in my belly remembered what he smelled like, clean and masculine, and took flight. I’d been off the market for too long. What were the rules? When would he call? I was lost in my internal meltdown when I heard my name.
“W-what?” I asked a little breathless. A little in lust with a certain tall, sexy, inked, hockey player.
“I said, I can’t believe your friend turned him down.” Alec finished his beer and set it on the table, pulling his wallet from his pocket.
“She didn’t know him, and she was with Pete at the time, her boyfriend.” It was a white-lie I told myself. I kept the shame I felt for that night on a tight leash. What had happened wasn’t right, but I tried to remember I hadn’t given in.
“Well, he had his eye on you tonight, that’s for damn sure.”
“I’m sitting right here, Trent.” Ben’s voice was cold and Trent frowned.
“Sorry, I didn’t think. My mouth has a mind of its own sometimes.”
The atmosphere at the table burned to ash at the edges. Ben’s eyes found mine, and my guilt had screws burrowing into my sternum.
I don’t belong to you, Ben.
The words were a whispered plea skating on the tip of my tongue. But I swallowed them down. “We should get going. It’s really late.”
Trent and Alec were already standing, settling their checks, and I left my glass of wine half-full on the table, standing as well.
“See you in the office tomorrow.” Trent wrapped me neatly into a side hug.
“Tell David I’m glad he thinks I’m adorable,” I said as I pulled away. To my surprise, my very good-looking boss blushed. He was shorter than most guys, just an inch or two taller than me, but traditionally handsome with blond hair and blu
e eyes.
“Much more professional tomorrow. I promise.”
I laughed. “I think it’s great. Don’t stop kissing your secretary on my account.”
Alec shook my hand with a promise to show me the ropes. He was a junior accountant, still making his way, but he’d been assigned to help me adjust. “It’s good to have you on board, Stevie.” He smiled at me, letting those piercing green eyes of his scan my body from head to toe like he had this morning.
Those eyes and his sharp features probably won him favor with the ladies for most of his life. Too bad he was arrogant as hell.
“Did you want me to drop you at your place?” Ben asked as he pulled his rental car keys from his pocket.
His light eyes were glazed and the flush in his cheeks told me he drank more than he’d intended, but he’d never be too drunk to drive. He was too controlled to ever risk it.
“You don’t have to do that…I can call for a ride.”
“I want to.” He raised his hand and I stopped breathing as he placed a stray piece of my hair behind my ear.
“Your hotel is by the airport, Ben. It’s out of the—”
“Let me take you home, Stevie.”
“No.”
He let out an exasperated breath. “Why? You meeting that guy?”
I laughed without humor. “That’s not your business.”
“I hate that.”
“Hate what?” I couldn’t hold back my frustration. Where was jealous Ben a year ago? Two years ago, three years ago, for that matter.
“That it’s not my business anymore.” His jaw flexed and tears seared the corners of my eyes.
“A little over a year ago, we sat on that tiny couch in the therapist’s office and I told you I was drowning. You didn’t care then and you don’t care now. I love you, Ben. You’re one of my best friends, but we stopped being in love a long time ago and you know it.”
Breakaway (The Rule Book Collection) Page 4