by Kara Hart
But I can see everything she does because I need her that badly.
“You know what I mean,” I whisper in her ear.
“I’m really tired,” she says, all too quickly. Her muscles tighten up and she feels rigid. She can barely get a breath in. She won’t allow it.
“Sit on my face,” I say again. “I want to feel you cum.”
My hand slowly trails down along the inside of her thigh and I can see as she closes her eyes that she wants this. There’s no question she wants this. My cock pushes out from my pants as I unzip and rip the belt away. Her trembling hand moves toward it. She stretches her fingers and touches the tight skin. She breathes out hard and makes a small noise, betraying the secret promise she made to herself.
I’ve come to ruin that promise. I’ve come to make her mine forever. “Yes,” I moan. “Touch it like a good girl.”
“I can’t let you in that easy. This will happen every single time,” she says, pulling her hand back. I grab her wrist and she instinctively holds my hand in hers.
“I want this every single day of my life. Don’t you understand? I fucked up one time,” I say in a hushed tone. “I didn’t know I got you pregnant. I had no fucking idea. So now, I’m here to make things right. I’m going to make you my woman, whether you fight me or not.”
“I hate you,” she says, suddenly spitting on my face.
I rip my shirt off and pin her against the kitchen pantry door. “Good,” I whisper. “I hate me too. Let it all out.”
“You piece of shit,” she says, growing angrier. “I want you to leave. I want you to never come back.”
“Good!” I smile and grab her cunt. “Yet, you’re wet. You’re clearly turned on by me.”
“Fuck you,” she says, breathing quickly now. She grabs my hair and I let her push me down underneath her.
I don’t say a fucking word. I roll her panties down to her ankles and slide my tongue against her wetness. She nearly screams, before placing her hands around her mouth.
“Don’t wake our son,” I say, ripping her panties off her ankles.
“Or what?” she talks back, though there’s a slight smile forming behind that scowl on her face.
I fold her panties in half, so that they’re nice and tight, and quickly tie them around her mouth. I grab her wrists and use my shirt to tie them together. She moans through the fabric, but makes no attempt to kick me.
“Good. Now, you can’t fight it.” I smile. “I know who you really are, deep down. You might be a mother, but inside that sexy body of yours is a whore waiting to be brought out.”
She moans something inaudible, growing wetter now. “I’m not going to leave you, Erica,” I say, “And I’m never going to let you go.”
Her panties gag her as I carry her to the couch. I grab her legs and push them apart. She makes no attempt at fighting me, and even pushes her ass out when I touch her juicy skin. “Close your eyes,” I tell her. “I want you to enjoy this.”
My tongue falls flat and heavy against her sopping pussy. Those sweet folds are the only thing I’ve been living for lately. When I taste her, I make sure my tongue pushes deep inside her. I lick from left to right, sliding up and down her ass. I’m not a man who is timid. I enjoy all of her, every single part of her sex.
She is a mystery waiting to be found out. The only way I can get through to her is by making her cum. Tonight, it’s all about her.
I first slide two fingers inside her and move the tips up and down. “Promise not to be a bad girl?” I ask her. I remove her gag, so she can speak.
“I, uh, don’t promise anything,” she moans.
I slide my fingers out. I place them against her mouth and she opens wide for me. She tastes herself and closes her eyes, tongue wrapping around the knuckles, lips drawing tight. I slide my fingers back in her pussy and repeat the necessary motions.
I begin sucking on her clit with intent to leave her squirming. When my fingers are back in her mouth, I gag her. I keep them in her mouth as I slide my cock against her clit, without penetrating her in the slightest. I just tease her and tease her, until she’s very audibly moaning.
“How?” she finally asks. “How are you this good?”
“I want to please you,” I say, sucking on her long lips. Her pussy is so fucking pretty that it deserves a diamond necklace.
“Forever?” she moans. “Just like this? You’re not going to change all of a sudden?”
“Forever,” I whisper. My fingers from both hands intertwine with hers and my mouth falls around her beautiful pussy again. It grows tight and sweeter tasting. Her stomach begins shaking, along with every joint in her body. “I’m here,” I moan.
“You’re going to make me cum,” she says. “Keep eating me.”
Her cheeks grow flush with a gorgeous glow. She looks so fucking beautiful, right before she’s about to lose it all for me. Her toes begin to curl right when she knows it’s going to happen. Her hands wrap tightly around mine. She groans and shuts her eyes tightly. Everything is hanging on a thread, or the tip of a needle. One small move, and it all comes crashing down. One word can set it all off.
“Cum,” I whisper.
Like a crashing wave against a rocky shore, like the slip of a trigger, like the breaking of glass, and the rush of adrenaline, everything stays silent, before crashing into a cacophony of sound. It lets out of her body like a cry of uncertainty, until it moves into pure euphoria and relief, and understanding.
“Finally,” she whispers to herself, though I don’t necessarily know what that even means to her.
I quickly kiss her mouth and thread my fingers in her hair. “I love you,” I whisper. She slides from the couch below me and opens her mouth. Without warning, I feel her tongue slide against my cock and she strokes it with purpose, as I slide out from her mouth.
“I love you too,” she says. I can’t deny, I cum within a minute after hearing her say those words. She loves me? Well, I fucking need her. I hold her hair tightly as I shoot my load, around her pretty mouth. She swallows me and smiles, kissing around my cock.
“I never swallow for anyone,” she quickly reiterates. “And if you treat me like shit ever again, I’ll have to kill you.”
“You can poison me. You can hire a hitman. I don’t care. I’m downright obsessed with you,” I laugh.
Whatever happens, the truth will remain that I did, at the very least, love her as much as a man can. I may have made a few mistakes. Who hasn’t? That doesn’t mean I can’t correct them for the future. I can be the best dad Aidan’s ever dreamed of, while remaining a dedicated husband for Erica. That is, if she lets me have the honor of pursuing both jobs. It’s all I want. It’s all I’ll ever want.
“You can stay the night,” she finally says. “But tomorrow, you’ll have to leave.”
Tomorrow? How did I get so damn lucky?
Erica
I put up as much of a fight as I could last night, but as tough as I fought, he still ended up winning. It’s just that when I look at him, something happens to me. It’s like everything turns a different temperature. My vision gets clearer and I feel happy again. Even when I’m angry with him and feel betrayed, I can’t look at him and truly say I want nothing to do with him. I can lie about it. I can hope he disappears, so I don’t have to deal with the repercussions, but even then, I’ll have to deal with my sadness when I find out he’s never coming back. All I can do now is hope for the best, for my son.
“Wake up, darling,” he says into my ear. His hands wrap around my back and I feel so warm.
It’s hard not knowing which path to take. What am I supposed to say? Am I supposed to turn to him with loving eyes and kiss him with every ounce of passion in the world? “Hey, Walker,” I smile.
He does the work and kisses me. His lips crush against mine and goose bumps shoot across my body. His cologne smells so fucking good.
“Mm,” he moans and opens his eyes. His hand moves across my cheek. “Do you still want me to leave?” He
kisses me again, tongue sliding against mine.
“Mom!” Aidan slams against the door. Thank God it’s locked. “Open the door, please!” he calls out.
“I guess not,” I laugh. I yell to Aidan, “One second!”
“Get dressed,” I tell him. “I don’t want him knowing you’re sleeping in the same bed with me.”
“God forbid his dad sleeps with his mom,” he sighs and puts on his jeans. I look over at his chest and perfect body and I give into him. I kiss his abs and feel around his arms.
“Maybe you’re right,” I sigh. “I just feel so weird about this whole thing.”
“You can trust me, Erica. I promise you,” he says. From my experience, all men say these things. The words hold very little weight after some time passes.
“If I trust you, that means I’m giving everything to you,” I tell him, holding onto his hands tightly. “If you do what you did before, I’ll be left in pieces.”
“I don’t ever want to hurt you,” he explains.
“Okay, but I need to tell you this, Walker. Raising a kid is one hell of a responsibility. It’s not just about playing basketball or taking him to the park,” I say. “It’s helping him with his homework, taking him to school on time, getting him to go to bed at a decent hour, and maintaining his emotions. You have no time for yourself. Trust me on this. If you can’t do the job, I don’t want you to make a promise to me that you will. Aidan is way more important to me than you are.”
He silently grabs his shirt and for a brief second, it almost seems like he’s about to leave. When he sits back down, I expect a long and painful goodbye. Instead, he smiles. “I want to be in his life as much as I do yours,” he says. “I’ve lived a long life in such a short amount of time. Raising Aidan will be a fucking privilege. There’s nothing I want more in this world.”
“Nothing?” I ask. “You swear to me? You’re not lying to me again?”
“No more lies,” he says. “I can’t believe I ever lied to you. It breaks my heart.”
“It breaks mine too,” I say, unlocking the door slowly. “But Aidan likes you. I can tell he does. If he approves, maybe I should give you another chance.”
“I won’t let you down again,” he promises. Aidan comes running in the room, already dressed and ready to go to the park.
“Walker!” he yells, jumping onto the mattress. He starts bouncing, with his shoes on and everything.
“Aidan, no shoes on the bed!” I tell him. Walker runs to the rescue and picks him up, swinging him into his arms. I can’t help but laugh because it’s the cutest thing I’ve seen in ages.
“We’re going to shoot some hoops, as they say in America?” Walker asks him.
“Where are you from, mister?” Aidan asks.
“Britain, lad,” he says. I roll my eyes.
“Is it nice?” he asks him.
“Dreadful place,” he smiles. “It’s full of dragons, kings, queens, and even knights.”
“Dragons?!” he screams, jumping out of his grip. He lands feet first on the ground and looks over at me with extreme excitement.
“Mom, can we go?” he politely asks me.
“Someday,” I tell him. “Right now, we’re going to the park!”
At the park, I sit and listen to music, while they play basketball. It’s possibly the first day in a very long time since I’ve gotten to relax a bit. I used to love listening to music outside, while going on long walks. There’s so much I used to love doing, but as you grow older, your time starts to dwindle. You have to sacrifice these things.
Having Walker around is helpful and it’s wonderful to see Aidan excited like this. Not to mention, he makes my legs shake. He gets me wet. He presses my buttons in all the right ways. God, I want him so fucking badly. Though, I still have the heavy weight in my stomach related to telling Aidan that Walker is his real dad, but that can wait for a while. Right now, I just need to see where this is headed.
They come over to the park bench, both exhausted and clinging to me. My two men. “Have fun?” I laugh.
“He killed me out there!” Walker winks.
Aidan says, “I got a three pointer and won the game.”
“I had no idea you liked basketball so much,” I say. I guess when you’re as busy as I am, it’s hard to really keep up on everything.
Aidan grabs the ball and returns to the court, practicing by himself. “This is fun.” I look at Walker.
“Yeah?” he asks. “You really think so? Because it’s been one of the best days of my life.”
“I know that’s a lie,” I laugh.
“I’m serious,” he says with a look of pure honesty. “I can’t believe I have a son. I’m going to fucking cry bullets.”
His hand curls around mine. I squeeze against his fingers and feel hopeful. “I hope you’re serious. This is a daily thing for me. Every year with Aidan is completely eye opening. He’s getting so big.”
“God,” he sighs. “Why’d I go back to England?”
“It’s okay,” I whisper. “It’s okay now. As long as you’re back for good.”
“I am. I’ll never leave you. I just can’t believe I didn’t get to see my son come into this world,” he says. “My life feels like one giant joke.”
“Welcome to adulthood.” I kiss him. “But just to let you know, your life isn’t a joke. It has purpose if you wish to live it.”
“I know. You’ve taught me that much. I’m confident about the future now,” he says.
“Then I’m confident about us.” Maybe I’ve made a bad choice in taking him back, but I’m going to see this one through. He seems honest this time. I’m seeing good things in the horizon. Fuck it, there’s no use in hiding it. I’m still in love with him. I always will be.
Walker
My phone buzzes against my face and I wake up, staring at her wall. I grab my phone and quickly answer it, rubbing my eyes hard. “Erica, is everything okay?” I ask, thinking it might be her, calling from work. I hear her cooking breakfast in the kitchen and realize it’s Sunday.
“We’ve found you,” a voice says.
“Hawk,” I sit up, shaking with rage. There’s a sharp laughter on the other end of the call. “Face me once and for all. No weapons. Face me and let’s end this.”
“Don’t forget where you came from,” he says. “Stop running from the past. It always catches up to you.”
“I’ve changed, Hawk. I’m a new person,” I say. I think of Aidan and my heart starts pounding faster. I need to protect him, but how can I tell them who I really am? They won’t understand when they hear my story. Erica will kick me out for good.
He continues to laugh. “Stop fooling yourself,” he says.
“Just leave me alone. You want money? Great, I’ll send you a check. I’m done with the business. I’m done working for you, Hawk. I’ve got other priorities,” I say, glancing over the backyard wall
“All the lies you’ve been living,” he says. “Do you think your little family would understand?”
“You bastard,” I scream. “Come and find me. Now! I’m right here, dammit!”
The phone clicks and I’m left with silence. I have to stop myself from throwing the phone at the wall and shattering it to pieces. “Fuck,” I whisper, falling to my knees.
All I want is to turn things around. I want to block out all my wrong doings. It’s not all my fault. I was brought in as a young kid. I didn’t know any better. I had no guiding force in my life. As an adult, I still have no say. I’ve made all the wrong decisions. This new life of mine is all over once Erica finds out who I really am. A monster. A low life. A sucker who fell into the wrong shit.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” Erica walks into the room, wiping her hands on a dishtowel.
“Nothing,” I smile. “Just talking to the realtor.”
“You’re getting a new house?” she asks me, shocked. “Since when?”
The lies keep stacking up. I’m just digging the hole deeper. “I’m just keeping an eye
out,” I say, hugging her. “You know, just in case you want something bigger.”
I kiss her, while she simply rests her chin against my shoulder. She’s not buying it. “What is up with you this morning?” She walks away from me, shaking her head, lost in thought.
I lean against the doorway and sigh to myself. There’s so much guilt pent-up inside me. I have no idea what to do. Do I tell her and let everything fall apart in an instant? Of course not. Her worrying isn’t going to help anything. I need to protect them on my own.
Breakfast is normal. We all sit at the table like a real family, but I’m not fully there and Erica can sense it. When we go to the park again, we walk toward the court in silence. That is, until she decides to break it.
“Can you just tell me what you’re thinking? Are you trying to back out of this already?” she asks, looking hurt.
“I’m not, Erica,” I tell her. “I’m telling you the truth.”
“I have to be really stupid to be trusting you, don’t I?” she asks me. “Whatever it is you’re planning can’t be good. I can tell. You have that same look on your face as the day you left.”
We continue walking for a good couple of minutes and I have no idea what to say to her. A man walks next to us and smiles. I recognize his face. He’s the same man from the bar, right before I left to England.
My muscles twitch. My eyes dilate. I clench my fists together. “Cute kid you got there,” he says to Erica. I hold my fucking breath, waiting for him to spill everything about me.
“Thank you.” She smiles and continues to walk.
I whisper at her, “Come on. Let’s keep walking.”
She looks at me with a sense of urgency in her eye. “What’s wrong, Walker?”
“I just get a bad feeling about this guy,” I whisper.
The man continues to walk the other way and whistles to himself. “Bye, Aidan,” he says. A chill runs up my spine. I spin around and the man has turned into the nature trail, barely able to be seen.