by Aria Ford
“Oh, honey,” she said, sniffling. “We all are.”
I hurried over to finish the appetizers while my mother launched into a story about our neighbor, Mrs. Greenburg.
“Apparently she seduced one of her students,” Mom said, using her scandalous voice. “Honestly, I can’t say I was surprised. You know she’s always been sketchy. I told your father, I said, ‘George, that woman is trouble. I don’t want her anywhere near the kids.’ But he always insisted she was fine. Now look, I was right!”
“Uh-huh,” I said, barely paying attention.
As much as I loved my mom, she was often exhausting. Her penchant for gossip was not something we had in common. I found senseless drama to be boring and uninspired, but she lived for it. Every time I came home, she would give me the rundown on the latest neighborhood news. As her daughter, it was my job to listen politely, but I never remembered a thing she said.
Today I would have been happy to talk about my brother. Bradley was coming home—Bradley and Ryan. My stomach clenched tightly as I thought about Ryan. I hadn’t seen him in over nine years. Last time we were face-to-face, I was only fourteen. It felt like a different life.
“Get the cake out, would you?” Mom asked, taking the appetizer trays into the living room.
“Sure,” I said.
I opened the fridge and pulled out a giant box. As I set it on the counter, I smiled to myself. This was going to be a great day. I opened the box to examine the cake, and my mood changed immediately. Staring at the cake, I felt an uncontrollable rage deep in my stomach. My face flushed, and when my mother entered the kitchen, she looked at me in shock.
“Jacqueline,” she said. “Honey, what is the matter?”
“Why isn’t Ryan’s name on the cake?” I demanded.
“What?” Mom asked, a slight frown on her face.
“It just says ‘Bradley,’” I explained. “Why isn’t Ryan on here too? He’s coming home today.”
“He’s not coming,” Mom said quickly. She smoothed down her apron nervously and walked over to the sink. Her back was to me, but I could tell she was upset.
“Why not?” I asked.
She shrugged. “He didn’t want to.”
“His name should be on the damn cake, Mom,” I snapped. “This is bullshit.”
“Watch it,” she said, turning to face me with a stern expression. “You don’t know everything Ryan put us through.”
“I know enough,” I said, still fuming. “You adopted him, Mom. You and Dad brought him into this family and then you just abandoned him.”
“We did not,” Mom said, her own anger showing in her voice.
“Hey,” my dad said, suddenly stepping into the kitchen. “People are starting to arrive.”
My mother gave me a look of warning before she hurried into the living room. I could hear her greeting family and friends with her high-pitched hostess voice. The sound made me cringe. I was still angry as my dad ushered me into the living room, but I put on a happy face. I smiled and nodded politely, just waiting for Bradley to arrive.
When he did, my anger disappeared. He ran into the house with a huge grin on his face, coming straight to me. He grabbed me and lifted me off the ground, spinning me in a fast circle.
“There she is!” he said. “I missed you, little sister.”
“I missed you, too, big brother.”
Bradley set me down and turned to our parents. He hugged them both for a long time, making tears fall down Mom’s cheeks. I knew how happy she was to have him home, and the sight warmed my heart. My anger was still there, hidden beneath the surface, but I knew now wasn’t the time to release it. This was her moment, just as much as mine or Dad’s. We were all happy to have Bradley home safely. My frustrations weren’t important.
After Bradley greeted all the guests and ate a few bowls of gumbo, he grabbed two slices of cake and dragged me to the backyard. We sat on the back porch together, eating our cake in silence. There were so many questions I wanted to ask him, but I would wait. We had time. Right now there was only one question that needed to be voiced.
“So,” I said, licking the frosting off my fork. “Where is he?”
Bradley stiffened beside me and exhaled slowly. With a sigh, he set his plate down and turned to face me.
“Richmond,” he said. “He moved to Richmond.”
“Really?” I asked with surprise. “Why there?”
Bradley shrugged. “I don’t know. I tried to convince him to come back here, but you know how he gets.”
“Do I?” I laughed. “I haven’t seen him in nine years, Brad.”
“God, has it been that long?” Bradley asked in disbelief.
“I was fourteen,” I said.
“Damn.” He shook his head slowly and sighed. “This is fucking ridiculous.”
“I know,” I said. “I asked Mom why his name wasn’t on the cake, and she made some lame excuse.”
“What’d she say?” he asked.
“Just that he didn’t want to come,” I said.
“Well, he didn’t,” Bradley said. “She’s not wrong about that.”
“Still,” I said with anger. “He should be here.”
“I know,” Bradley said. “I feel the same way you do, Ash. Listen, there’s something I wanted to ask you—a favor.”
“Okay,” I said slowly. “What is it?”
“I need you to keep an eye on him,” Bradley said. “Just check in on him every once in a while. His apartment isn’t far from your clinic. I looked it up.”
“I don’t know,” I said, shifting uncomfortably. “Are you sure I’m the best person to do that? We haven’t seen each other in so long.”
“I know,” Bradley said. “But, Ash, there’s no one else. He doesn’t have anyone else. It’s just us.”
I didn’t answer right away. My worry was too great. Of course I cared about Ryan. But what would I say to him? After not seeing him for almost a decade, I didn’t even know him anymore. I was just a child the last time we spoke.
“Listen,” Bradley said. “Without someone around, he’ll slip. I know him, okay? I know him better than anyone. He needs someone to be there, to support him. Without that, I’m afraid he’ll go back to his old ways.”
“You really think that would happen?” I asked.
“I don’t know,” Bradley admitted. “I hope not, but I’d feel better if I knew you were looking out for him. Please?”
I nodded. “Okay.”
“Yeah?”
“Sure,” I said. “I can’t promise it’ll do any good, but I’ll stop by. It would be good to see him.”
“Thank you,” Bradly said, wrapping his arm around me for a quick hug.
We sat on the porch for a while longer, finishing our cake and catching up. My mind stayed focused on Ryan, though. I pictured his face, heard his voice, and wondered what he would be like after all these years.
CHAPTER THREE
Ryan
My new apartment wasn’t yet decorated. I barely managed to unpack my clothes and set up my bed. My couch was thrown in the middle of the living room, with nothing else around it. I knew I would need a TV and maybe a kitchen table, but I wasn’t in a hurry to buy them. Most of my life, I didn’t have a lot. Just having my own place—not paid for by the navy—felt liberating.
As I ate breakfast, I glanced around the apartment. It was small. A one-bedroom with one bathroom and a combined living and dining room. I had a patio, which was nice, and a tiny front porch. It wasn’t much, but I already loved it. Still, I felt confined as I finished my oatmeal. After being in the military for so long, I felt bored and restless. Without the constant shuffle of missions and physical training, I didn’t know what to do with myself.
I rinsed my bowl and threw on my shoes. A run would help clear my mind. I locked my front door and took off down the road. Richmond was a new city for me to explore. I’d spent a little time here as a kid, but not much.
As I ran, I looked around the neighborhoo
d. My apartment building sat behind a subdivision filled with large houses. I turned, jogging through the streets and checking out the houses as I ran. Most of them were two-stories with fancy cars parked out front. I sighed and shook my head. Everything about this subdivision reminded me of the Keeton’s home.
Shaking my head, I ran faster, trying to push the memories away. Most of the houses sported American flags. I noticed them and wondered how many of these families actually knew members of the military.
Being in Virginia, it was safe to say that most people were patriotic, but that didn’t mean much. I’d found that patriotism didn’t always extend past a few flags and “I Support the Troops” bumper stickers. It used to frustrate me, but I was used to it now. I didn’t let it bother me as I continued down the street.
Running was second nature to me. After years of PT and physical exertion, my body needed the exercise to function. I wasn’t the kind of person who could survive off potato chips and sitcoms. If I didn’t run at least once a day, I would lose my mind.
Still, running through these suburban streets wasn’t what I craved. I already missed the rough terrains I used to traverse. My feet longed for rocky paths and bumpy trails. Deep down, I was happy to be a civilian again, but part of me felt lost, unsure.
When I first joined the navy, it was because I didn’t have anything else. The military was just a natural step. It didn’t mean much until I decided to become a SEAL. Then my life had purpose. I suddenly felt like the person I was always meant to be. Without that time, I knew my life would have fallen apart. I wasn’t the best kid or teenager. I was on the path that most foster kids take, a dangerous one. But the SEALs changed all that. They pushed me and inspired me, turning me into a man who was finally worthy of a good life.
As I jogged back to my apartment building, my mind drifted to my last mission. It was a success. Bradley and I both made it out alive, as did our team. Everything went smoothly, except for the insurgent I killed. Just thinking about it made my stomach clench. I forced the guilt away and turned a corner, stopping dead in my tracks.
My eyes fell on my front porch where a woman was standing. As I watched, she raised her knuckles and knocked on the door. She took a step back and waited for an answer that wouldn’t come.
With a frown, I walked slowly forward, taking in her appearance as I moved. She was wearing a simple t-shirt and jeans, with tennis shoes tied tightly on her feet. Her blonde hair was curled up into a neat bun at the back of her head. Something about her seemed familiar, but I couldn’t place it. The closer I got, the more attractive she became.
She heard my footsteps and turned around. Her green eyes were hidden behind a pair of black rimmed glasses. They locked on my face, and she smiled nervously as she looked me up and down. I stepped in front of her, ready to introduce myself, when I suddenly realized why she looked familiar.
“Jacqueline?” I asked with wide eyes.
“Hey, Ryan,” she said, laughing lightly. “It’s good to see you.”
“Holy shit,” I breathed. “What are you doing here? How are you?”
“Bradley told me you moved here,” she said. “My clinic is just a few miles down the road, so I thought I’d stop by and see you. It’s been a long time.”
I nodded. “Nine years, right?”
“Something like that,” she said.
“Well, come here,” I said, walking over to her and giving her a hug. It was strange, and I pulled away quickly. She wasn’t the little girl I remembered.
I felt awkward just standing outside, but I didn’t know what to say. Seeing Jacqueline was a huge shock. The last time we were around each other, she was just a kid. At eighteen, I bolted without a second thought. I hadn’t seen Bradley’s little sister since.
“Do you want to come inside?” I asked.
She smiled. “Sure. That would be great.”
I stepped around her to unlock the door. We both walked inside, and I immediately felt self-conscious about my place.
“It’s kind of barren,” I said, scratching my head. “I haven’t had a chance to organize yet.”
Jacqueline shrugged. “No worries. It’s great.”
“Are you thirsty?” I asked. “I’m gonna grab some water.”
She nodded. “Water would be good.”
I hurried to the kitchen and grabbed two water bottles from the fridge. Walking back over to her, I tossed her a bottle, and she caught it easily. We both took a few sips and fell into an uneasy silence. There was so much to say, but neither of us knew where to start.
“So,” I finally said. “How have you been?”
She nodded. “Good. I’ve been good. Graduated vet school and moved out here. I’m working at a clinic now.”
“Yeah, Bradley mentioned something about that,” I said. It was true. Bradley often filled me in on his family, but I rarely listened. It was easier to pretend like they didn’t exist.
“We missed you at the party,” Jacqueline said softly. “It wasn’t the same without you.”
“I doubt that,” I scoffed. “I’m sure your parents had a great time.”
“They did,” Jacqueline admitted. “But it wasn’t the same for Bradley and me. We missed you.”
“Yeah,” I said, scratching my head again. Jacqueline meant well, but I didn’t want to talk about her family.
“It was good to see Bradley,” she said. “I’m glad he’s home for good now. I’m glad you both are.”
“It’s nice to be out,” I said with a shrug. “Still feels kind of weird, though.”
“It’ll take a while to adjust,” Jacqueline said. “Getting back into civilian life can’t be easy. For anyone.”
“It’s not,” I admitted. “But it’s nice.”
She smiled. “Yeah.”
We fell into another uneasy silence, glancing at each other every so often. I didn’t know what to say, but I knew I didn’t want her to leave yet.
“Listen,” I said suddenly. “Are you hungry?”
“Um,” she said. “Sure, I could eat.”
“Let me grab a quick shower, and we can go get lunch,” I said.
Jacqueline nodded. “Sounds great.”
“Make yourself at home,” I said, gesturing toward the couch. “I’ll only be a minute.”
“Take your time,” she said. “No rush.”
I smiled and hurried into my bedroom. Closing the door behind me, I sighed deeply and ran my hands over my face. Seeing Jacqueline again was a total surprise. I wasn’t ready to face anyone from Bradley’s family, and the last thing I expected was for one of them to appear on my doorstep. Quickly, I walked into the bathroom and jumped in the shower.
As I showered, I let the water wash away my nerves. There was no reason I should feel so weird about seeing Jacqueline again. It had been years, but she was still Bradley’s sister. She, unlike her parents, never did anything to hurt me. She was just a sweet, innocent kid who was nice enough to drop by. I forced myself to calm down as I turned off the shower and got dressed. Having lunch with Jacqueline would be fun, just like old times. All I had to do was relax.
CHAPTER FOUR
Jacqueline
After Ryan disappeared to take a shower, I stood awkwardly in his living room. I looked around, taking in the lack of furniture and unpacked boxes. Ryan didn’t have a lot of possessions, but it was strange to see the apartment so empty.
I knew I should sit down on the couch to wait for him, but I couldn’t bring myself to move. Our interaction felt so forced and uncomfortable. It was good to see him, but I didn’t realize how weird it would be after all these years.
Finally, I forced myself to sit down and wait for him. I nestled into the couch cushions and sipped my water, not sure what to think. Seeing Ryan again was nice, but he was nothing like the boy I remembered. With Bradley, I saw the changes in him each time he returned home on leave. With Ryan, it felt like I blinked and he became this man. This man who was incredibly attractive. When I saw him outside, I felt sure
I had the wrong apartment. The tall, muscular man standing in front of me couldn’t possibly be Ryan Link.
But it was. My shock and discomfort were quickly replaced with joy. It felt great to see him. I just wished it hadn’t been nine years since we were last in the same place. As I sat on the couch, Ryan’s bedroom door opened, and he called out to me.
“What do you feel like for lunch?” he asked. “I was thinking burgers.”
He opened the door so I could hear him, but it allowed me to see inside his room. He was wearing nothing but a towel, and his bare chest glistened with water from the shower. I stared pointedly up at the ceiling before I answered.
“Sure,” I said. “That sounds good.”
“There’s also a really good Mexican place around the corner,” he suggested. “I can’t remember. Do you like Mexican food?”
“Not really,” I answered. “Burgers sound good.”
“Okay, burgers it is,” he said brightly. “We’ll hit the diner down the street.”
My attention was still focused on the ceiling. I wished he would hurry up and get dressed so I wouldn’t have to keep my neck craned upward. I wasn’t the kind of person who engaged in conversations with half-naked men. My face felt flushed.
“What are you looking at?” Ryan asked, his voice sounding much closer now.
I looked down to see him standing in the doorway, fully clothed. My cheeks burned, and I smiled to cover my discomfort.
“Nothing,” I said. “You just have a crack up there. That’s all.”
“Oh,” Ryan said, glancing up at the ceiling with a frown. “Good to know.”
“Yup,” I said, jumping off the couch. “You ready to go?”
Ryan nodded and led the way outside. He locked the door behind us, and we set off toward the diner.
“It’s just across the street,” Ryan said. “Close enough to walk.”
I nodded. “Great.”
As we walked, Ryan kept up most of the conversation. Any awkward tension he felt upon my arrival was clearly gone. His easy demeanor was back, and he seemed more like the person I remembered. Still, I felt weird walking beside him. When we made it to the diner, we sat down in a corner booth and waited for a waitress to bring us menus. She took our drink orders before she walked away.