The piece of lead tinkled loudly into the little pan that he dropped it in, as he continued digging into the incision on the back of Asia’s shoulder. My temper began to rise. What was he doing? Couldn’t he see she was bleeding out? He pulled something else out of the wound with a pair of tweezers.
The nurse quickly took it from him and stretched out Asia’s shirt and pressed out the bloody patch onto the hole in the shirt.
“It fits!” She said.
“Good, let’s get her closed up and an IV started.” The Doctor said.
They moved quickly and expertly in doing just that and I began to relax inside. The Doctor left off and the nurse took over.
The older man beside me spoke deeply, “Steve, he needs some attention too.”
I glanced down to see the small puddle of blood on the floor. I had completely forgotten about being hit first by the bullet. I couldn’t care less about my wound. The Doctor pulled my shirt up and inspected the wound. He glanced up at me and then over at Asia. “Minor miracle here Eli.” The Doctor said.
“How so?” Asked the man beside me curiously.
“The bullet hit him first, which stole most of its energy, but more than that hitting his rib deflect the bullet slightly off course. It would’ve cut a major artery otherwise and the bullet would’ve smashed off the bone and likely ping-ponged around inside of her, if it hadn’t first hit him.”
“That isn’t a small miracle by any means Steve.” The man called Eli said.
The Doctor smiled, “I guess not.”
“Is she going to be okay?” I asked breaking into the conversation.
“She’s lost a lot of blood, but the bullet doesn’t seem to have amounted to any major internal damage, so I think with some rest and recovery she’ll be absolutely fine. Betty, when you’re done there can you clean and stitch this up?”
The nurse quickly nodded.
Steve smiled at me, “Sorry I have to skip out like this, but I’ve got two sets of twins trying to beat each other out.”
I nodded in understanding, as he passed by me out the door. The nurse came to me and I held my shirt up for her, as she worked on my side. She was very proficient and soon had me stitched up. I let my shirt down, but she hadn’t moved away. Her steady hands and demeanor were gone.
Her fingers shaking she brushed away a tear unable to meet my eyes with hers, “I’m so sorry! I……”
“Your son?” I asked.
She nodded.
“Send him by later. I’d like to have a little talk with him.”
She nodded and left the room. I turned towards the man still by my side.
“Are you the leader here?” I asked.
He shrugged expressively, “Some look to me for guidance.”
“Can we stay until she’s better?”
“I wouldn’t hear of anything else!” He exclaimed.
“I can’t pay you anything.”
“No payment is required. Now why don’t you sit down over there and take a load off your feet and I’ll send you in some food.”
He left then and closed the door behind him. I waited a moment before approaching the bed. Asia’s color had improved drastically. I leaned down and pressed my ear to her chest relaxing as I felt the steady beat of her heart. I went to the other side of her and sat down heavily on a cot. I reached up to hold her hand and lean my forehead against the table. This had been much too close a thing.
The man called Eli was back with a tray of food. The plate was piled high with food, including a steak. I looked up questioningly at him and he gave a deep belly laugh.
“Only the kind that moos.” He responded still chuckling.
I dug into the food. It was good and I felt myself unwind some and I started to talk with Eli, who sat across from me. I liked the man and I felt at ease with him, as I rarely did with strangers or even those I knew.
There was a knock on the door before it opened. The boy was standing there with his mother. Haltingly he stepped into the room towards me. The first thing he did was hand me my sword. I took it back from him and studied it for a moment before glancing at Asia. It really had been an accident, nothing malicious intended. I turned the sword end for end and handed it back to the boy. The boy’s eyes widened drastically at the offered gift.
“Take it and keep your mother safe. You can go now.”
The boy took the sword, but looked around as if he couldn’t believe it.
He glanced at Asia and swallowed, “That’s all you have to say to me for what I did?”
I looked up at him, “What do you want me to say? You’re not going to fall asleep on sentry duty again are you?”
“No Sir!”
“I didn’t think so and it looks like you’ve put yourself through enough hell without me adding any so let’s leave it at that and move on.”
The boy managed to whisper out, “Thank you Sir.” Before he backed out of the room and closed the door.
Eli spoke up, “You made him a better young man just now and for that I thank you. Many can speak a hard thing and tear down, but few can actually build others up by speaking just plain ordinary words.”
There was a period of silence between us then, which Eli broke. “Is she important?” He asked.
I thought about it for a moment. “I guess you could say that she’s humanity’s last great chance at freedom.”
Eli nodded, as if he had suspected as much. His eyes seemed to bore into me. “But that is not why she is important to you is it? Tell me is she your wife?”
“She’s mine!” I responded firmly.
He seemed to accept the answer. “You should rest now. I’ll keep watch over her and wake you if you’re needed.” Eli said.
I was tired, especially after eating all the food that I had. I lay down on the cot, but sleep eluded me. It had always been hard to sleep ever since…… I opened my eyes, it wasn’t good to remember. I glanced over to see Eli reading something by candlelight. I sat up and his eyes drifted over to me.
“Is that a Bible?” I asked.
He nodded.
“You a preacher?”
“I am.” He affirmed.
I’d suspected as much. I stood up and moved toward the door, but stopped before I went through it.
“If you don’t mind I think she’d enjoy it if you were to read out loud. She draws comfort and meaning from those words.” I said before I started out the door.
“And what meaning do you have for her?” Eli asked deeply.
I stopped briefly, “I’m the man who’s supposed to be keeping her safe from all harm.” I said bitterly before stalking away into the night.
Eli stared at the closed door for a moment, as his finger tapped on his Bible. The man was hard to read. There was anger and perhaps even shame in his cloaked demeanor that he used to shield some private pain. There was also confusion to be sure and Eli stretched out a hand toward the door and prayed out against the spirit of confusion that he felt twisting the young man up inside. That done he turned back to the table and the beautiful patient that lay upon it.
He had a very good feeling about her. He glanced at the door, as he again remembered the big warrior’s request for the woman that he had claimed as his own. A smile touched Eli’s lips; the proper application of sweet honey always did catch more flies. He pulled his chair closer to the bed and picked up from where he had been reading in Psalms. Psalms was always a good book of the Bible to read, when one was in need of comfort. Eli’s deep voice filled the room with a resonating melody, as he read the Scriptures he’d read countless times before to his silent witness.
I watched the exact moment she came awake. She moaned and felt at her shoulder. Her eyes traced around the room and landed on me. I swallowed the chunk of apple I had been chewing on.
“How are you feeling?” I asked.
“Like I’ve been shot. Are there more of those?” She asked looking at my half eaten apple covetously.
“Covetousness is a sin.” I said with good
humor.
Her lips curved, “So you have read the Bible!”
“Bits and pieces come back to me now and then I admit.”
I helped prop her up and she reached for my apple. I smacked her hand away playfully. “Stealing is a sin too.”
“But I’m hungry!” She exclaimed piteously.
“So that makes it all right then?” I asked leadingly.
She rolled her eyes at me and I chuckled, as I reached for a bowl on a nearby table.
“What’s that?” She asked suspiciously.
I couldn’t help but admit how darned cute she was. I got a spoonful and pushed it in past her reluctant lips. Her face brightened and her lips closed around the spoon, quite taking my breath away in the process.
“Applesauce!” She exclaimed.
“Yeah.”
I fed her spoonful after spoonful with her smiling at me all along. With a speculative gleam in her eyes she stated, “Your brother’s named James and your John. Your mother named you for the apostles?”
“Just my brother.” I admitted grudgingly.
Her brow knitted up in concentration, “Then who?
The light of comprehension dawned brightly in her eyes, “John the Baptist?”
I nodded and she started giggling. I gave her a dark look, but kept feeding her, just glad inside that she was okay. So what if she was having fun on my account, I still had her, which meant that my world was still okay for now.
“What’s your middle name?” She asked inquisitively.
I didn’t answer.
“Ferdinand?” She asked teasingly.
I gave her a dark look again. She took another bite and then I saw the sudden thought hit her and I groaned inwardly.
“No, she couldn’t have!”
“Oh yes she did.” I affirmed remorsefully.
“Baptist?”
I nodded.
She laughed hard then and I did my best to bare it out as best as I could. It was a terrible name, especially for somebody like me, John Baptist Kilroy. I would never forgive my parents for it. Sourly, I set the bowl down in her lap and handed her the spoon. She made a real effort to stop laughing then and grabbed a hold of my arm.
“No don’t go! I’m sorry for laughing! Please stay!”
I stayed in the room.
In all we stayed at the little haven in the woods for two weeks, while Asia made a full recovery.
Chapter Eleven
Giving
“He told me once that God hated him and that he hated God in return. I don’t know how to deal with that.” Asia said.
Eli nodded.
Asia looked around as they walked along the pathways of the camp. Over the past two weeks she had grown close to Eli and she had confided a lot in him.
“He’s so bitter and angry! Like an endless well of the stuff. It’s as if it feeds him!”
Eli nodded, “Did you perhaps consider that his words are a clue to something else other than what they say?”
“What do you mean?”
“We both know that God does not hate people. He sent His only Son to die for them, for us. That isn’t an act of hate. He hates the sin not the person. So take away John’s first statement of God hating him and what do you have?”
“He hates God?” Asia said not understanding.
“How can he hate God without first having a relationship with God? Hate is a very powerful thing and sometimes it manifests itself in the form of a cover-up for a deeper underlying issue.” Eli said.
“Like what?”
“I’m just speculating here, but perhaps John is guilty or thinks he’s guilty of something that he thinks is so bad that he thinks God must hate him for it. Imagine where that would leave a person. Do you think you’d ever have any hope of anything getting better in your life if you thought God hated you? Every negative action of life would only reinforce your belief that you’re hated. What would your reaction be, but to hate back in return, because of how unjustly loved you feel yourself to be.”
Asian nodded, “But what do I do besides pray for him?”
“Love him! The more love he receives from you the more he’ll yearn for a deeper love that only God can fill.”
“But I don’t love him!” Asia exclaimed.
“You don’t? It seems like you’ve done a lot, sacrificed a lot for a man you don’t love.”
“I was just trying to please God! He asked me to give of myself so I did!”
“When did God tell you to stop?” Eli interjected softly.
Asia stopped with tears in her eyes, “This is hard! I’m being forced to give, give, give and all I feel like is I’m going to get chewed up by him and destroyed if I’m not careful. What’s he giving? Why do I have to be poured out in the sand for his pleasure? What did I do wrong? Why am I being tested like this?”
Eli stared at her, even as he loved her for her honesty, “I imagine that Queen Esther faced much the same problem, as you are right now. Look what her sacrifice led her to accomplish. I don’t mean to push the weight down hard on you, but to each of us falls the responsibility of making the decisions that we’re faced with in our generation. It’s not easy, but perhaps you were born for such a time as this. Who can tell what reward your faithfulness will achieve? Esther saved her people, perhaps you will to.”
Asia wiped at the tears on her face, “You really know how to hammer down the responsibility Reverend.”
“I’m sorry.” Eli said.
Asia reached out and squeezed his arm smiling briefly, “Don’t be. You’re right; it’s just hard to accept.”
They walked on for a ways. Eli glanced over at her speculatively, “You know he came by this morning to ask a favor of me.”
Asia looked surprised at that, “What did he want?”
“He asked, if I would marry you both before you start out in the morning. He said he thought you’d like things better, if there was something more official between the two of you so you didn’t feel like you were sinning or something as he put it.”
Asia pushed a strand of hair behind an ear, “What did you tell him?”
“I told him I’d do it provided that you were in agreement with it.”
Asia looked out at the forest and nodded her head, “Yes, I’m in agreement.”
Asia was being very quiet. I glanced back to see her staring at the ring on her finger. The ring had been unplanned, but had worked out well I thought. An old widow had stepped forward at the ceremony and pushed the ring into the palm of Asia’s hand. The old woman had said, “I used to have small fingers like you darling. Here take this and I pray you have as much happiness wearing it as I did.”
We were official now and it felt odd. Asia had kept her assumed name in place of her Japanese one, which I was quite fine with, Asia Kilroy. I could only imagine how my brother and Chantry would crow over me when they found out.
Why was she so quiet? If I had to say a word to describe her attitude it would be apprehensive. It dawned on me suddenly. She’d thought I’d used our marriage, as a way of short-circuiting our deal! That hadn’t been the reason and I would prove it to her. That evening I made two beds away from each other, even though it killed me to do it.
She watched me closely, but said nothing. After dinner I retired to my bed never saying a word to her. If she wanted to play the silent game than so be it, but I missed our easy-going almost friendship relationship of the past two weeks. In some ways I felt like I’d ruined it somehow by marrying her. All I’d been trying to do was please her.
I startled awake to find Asia kneeling beside me. I rubbed at my eyes; it had to be one or two in the morning! Quickly I scanned her hands for any glint of a knife. What was she up to? I couldn’t see her face clearly in the dark.
“Why did you go through a marriage ceremony?”
Didn’t Eli tell you why?”
“I want to hear it from you.” Asia said.
“I didn’t want anybody to think bad of you or you of yourself. Quite frankly,
you deserve a lot more than what you’re getting and giving you my name was the least I could do for messing your life up.”
She was quiet for a moment but then spoke, “That’s very caring of you John.”
“I’m not completely heartless.”
Her hand on my face was startling, “No, you’re not John.” And then she was kissing me.
Okay this was really good! I wanted to take over, but something bade me give her the time to experiment. So I contented myself with meeting her kisses passionately, but with reserve. I should have just taken her, because after a hot hour filled with her breathy kisses she was suddenly gone, while I lay there achingly awake for the rest of the night.
What a lousy day! What a lousy wedding night! Everything was lousy and on top of it all it looked like it was about to rain. Worst of all I was about to break my promise so help me.
This morning Asia had acted like nothing had happened last night. She’d insisted on learning how to navigate with a compass today and so she was in the front leading the way, every blessed sensuous inch of her. Bending, twisting, arching, and shifting side to side in evident feminine display.
I mopped at the sweat running down my face. It hurt just to walk. Never had I gone through such agony and restraint for a woman! I stopped and bent over with my hands on my knees in a crisis of urge and a battle of consciousness.
“John?”
I got a grip on my rampant thoughts and straightened back up not looking at her, “Stay here, while I go take care of something.”
“John.”
I forced myself to look at her. She was shifting from one foot to the other wringing her hands.
“I’m sorry! I chickened out on you last night. I got scared. We can do it now if you want.”
I glanced away from her out into the forest. She was finally giving me what I wanted. I sighed. It was an overpowering urge to take her up on her offer, but it wouldn’t be the smart thing to do right now. The plane couldn’t be much more than a brisk five hours walk from here.
Agent in the Dark (The Agents for Good) Page 9