“How does it still feel like that after all we did last night?” he asked in awe against my neck.
“You mean like something familiar and new all at the same time?” My fingers ran up and down his spine.
“Exactly. I can’t even begin to count the times over the years we’ve done this. That we’ve been inside each other’s body, mind, heart and soul. And while I know your body better than my own, it seems each time we connect, I notice something new. I can’t really explain it,” he said in awe.
“I know what you mean. I hope every day for the rest of our lives is like that, a combination of familiar and fresh. You’ll never get bored with me that way,” I said.
“I’ll never grow tired of you. Two years without you and being unable to picture anyone in my arms, my heart or my bed convinced me of that,” he vowed.
Even though he’d said pretty much that the other weekend, my heart still stuttered at the thought of him unable to fill my spot in his life. Guilt gripped me as I recalled my attempt to fill the Dawson-shaped hole in my life. Though I’d been unsuccessful, I still tried. Tried harder than he did.
His thumb brushed along my lip.
“Stop,” he said gruffly.
“Stop what?” I asked, feigning innocence and confusion.
“You know what. Feeling bad for trying to find love. I won’t say that I don’t hate it, but it’s not your fault you moved forward in your life. It’s not your fault I didn’t come after you to demand answers.”
“No. But it is my fault that I gave up without finding you,” I whispered.
“You realize that this cycle of blaming ourselves has to stop if we’re going to fully embrace this miracle of a second chance we’ve been given.”
♪ All I Need is a Miracle by Mike & the Mechanics
“You’re right. It just makes my heart hurt to think about it.” Liquid filled my eyes, and I fought to keep it from spilling.
Dawson shifted his body a little so he could press a kiss over my heart. “A kiss to make it better,” he offered with a grin. “I don’t hold anything against you. So, you don’t have the right to hold it against yourself. Please try to let it go… for me?”
“For you, I’d try anything,” I vowed.
“Anything?” he said, his voice dripping with wonderfully wicked intent.
I laughed. “Yes. Probably. But you have to feed me first.”
“That I can do,” he readily agreed. “In just a minute. First I want to talk to you about something.”
“Sounds serious.”
“It is. I have to leave in a few days to take care of some things in LA.”
I knew our time together would be short. I hated thinking of goodbye. But then, I’d always hated them when it came to Dawson. Our relationship had been peppered with them for years though. I ought to be used to them.
♪ Always Remember Us This Way by Lady Gaga
“Sounds to me like we’ve got to cram a lot of orgasms in before you go,” I said forcing brightness into my voice.
“Not if you come with me. I mean, we can still cram a bunch in. But what I mean is, I want you to come back to LA with me.” His face was serious.
“For how long? I don’t have any photo shoots scheduled this coming week. I figured it would take me a few days to tear down and pack up my pieces from the gallery. But since most of my stuff sold, I have some free time. And I don’t have much on my calendar for the week after that.” My mind was already shifting appointments so I could stay a little longer.
“A few weeks. A month. Forever,” he said with a hopeful look on his face.
“Wow. Really? You want to live together?” I squeaked. My insides were a riot of jubilation and nerves.
“You don’t have to decide right now. Just come with me tomorrow. See how it is. Give it a shot. I’ve lived as long as I want to without you. But if you’re not ready to take that step, I can be patient. Just know, I’m not giving up on us. I’ll do whatever it takes to make this work.” His fingers brushed the hair away from my face.
♪ Life was Meant for Two by Carl Wockner
“I have to admit the idea appeals to me and makes me nervous at the same time. I mean, I’d have to start over with building my photography business. And I wouldn’t know anyone but the band, and you guys will be gone a lot. And I’d need to find a doctor there who could handle my case. And—”
Dawson’s mouth descended on mine, trapping the rest of my worries inside.
“I know it’s a lot to think about. Take your time. Come for a visit now. We can figure out the rest later. I just don’t want to say goodbye to you tomorrow.”
“OK,” I said simply.
“OK, you’ll come?”
I nodded.
He kissed the breath out of me. His happiness had a taste and texture. It infused into me.
My stomach growling against his interrupted us. Laughter erupted between us.
“Let’s get you fed.” He climbed out of my bed. I couldn’t help but watch him as he moved across the room to the drawer where his stash of clothes had been moved. Muscles flexed and relaxed with each step.
“You planning to stay there and gawk at me all morning? Or do you want me to fix you some breakfast?” Dawson asked with a smirk as he turned back around.
“Can I get a show with my breakfast?” I teased.
“You want me to bust out with the helicopter or something?” he asked as he glanced down at his semi-erect cock.
“That would be entertaining,” I answered, biting my lip to keep from laughing.
“Raincheck. He’s too tired to perform.” Dawson tugged on the sweatpants he’d taken out.
“I’ll hold you to that.”
I threw off the sheet and sauntered over to where he stood by my dresser. I opened the second drawer and grabbed the band shirt I’d stolen from Dawson years ago. Naked, I walked into the bathroom to brush my teeth.
In seconds, I had company. Without a word, I handed him a new toothbrush, and we huddled around my sink, eliminating our morning breath. It was a very domestic task, one we used to carry out without much thought. Today, though, it meant a lot more.
He finished first and went to deal with breakfast while I finished up.
As I made my way to the living room, my phone rang. I dashed back to my room to grab it before it could stop.
Breathlessly, I answered, “Hello.”
“Isabelle, good morning,” Charles’s deep voice spoke in my ear. “How are you?”
“Good thanks. I hope you are too.”
“I am. I just wanted to call and congratulate you on the success of your show.”
“Thank you. I really appreciate all you did and the people you put me in contact with. Last night really was a dream come true.” I still felt like I was dreaming.
The sound of sizzling filled the open space as Dawson worked in the kitchen.
“I couldn’t be prouder of you. You really deserve something amazing in your life.”
“Thank you for taking a chance on me and encouraging me.” I owed Charles a lot.
“You definitely seem to have rediscovered your muse since our talk weeks ago,” he said in my ear.
My glance traveled to Dawson as I agreed with Charles, “Yes, I have.”
“Anyway, I was calling to tell you that you don’t have to arrange to come pick anything up because I am going to divide the remaining pieces between my two galleries. If you don’t mind that is?”
“That would be wonderful,” I gushed.
“Tomorrow, I will be depositing the money you earned from all the sales into your account. After all the expenses are paid, you’ll net about one hundred and seventy grand.”
I had to have heard him wrong. “Can you repeat that?”
He chuckled. “One hundred and seventy grand.”
I needed to sit down. My knees gave out, dropping me to the couch. “That’s unbelievable,” I whispered, tears filling my eyes.
“Believe it. I’m going to let yo
u go celebrate. I’ll be in touch.”
I stared off in space, my phone hanging limply in my hand until Dawson dropped down in front of me. His touch on my cheek snapped me out of it.
“Flutterby, what’s wrong?” his voice was concerned.
“Nothing.”
“Then why are you crying?”
“I’m crying?” I swiped at my face. Yep, I was crying. “I’m just overwhelmed. Charles just called to tell me how much money I made off the sale of my pieces last night.”
“Wow. So, what’s the verdict?” He settled on the couch next to me.
“One hundred seventy thousand dollars,” I whispered, covering my mouth with my hand as the number escaped. “Only thirty thousand and change left to pay off my hospital bills.”
Dawson whistled. “It’s amazing you sold enough to take such a huge chunk out of your debt. Um… I need to tell you something.”
My stomach twisted in knots over his tone. His voice was unsure. He got up and grabbed his phone off the bar separating the living room from the kitchen. As he walked, he was engrossed in finding something on it.
“Do you remember coming up with that slogan?” he asked, pointing to the words scrawled across the band shirt I wore. I dropped my gaze and read the words. Loyal to the lyrics, and loyal to the odyssey.
“Yeah.”
“And do you remember helping me work out the kinks in the chorus of our first hit single?”
“Yeah,” I answered with a frown.
“Well, I always argued with the label that you deserved a cut of sales on the song and merchandise with the slogan. They refused. They kept saying that your contract for the other work you did for the band never included a royalty share. Anyway, I talked with a lawyer about what would be standard,” he spoke so quickly I had a hard time comprehending.
He took a breath.
I had no idea where he was going. “I didn’t help you because I expected payment. I helped you because I love you,” I explained. I appreciated that he wanted me compensated, but it wasn’t a motivator.
“I know. Anyway, when I got my big royalty check a couple of years ago, I set aside the amount of money the lawyer said would be fair. I opened a bank account in your name. Since then, I’ve added a portion of the earnings from the song and merch sales. It wasn’t a lot at once. But over time, it’s added up.” He turned his phone around so I could see the screen.
Across the top of the screen was my name followed by what appeared to be an account number. The balance made my eyes widen.
“Daw, that says there’s over sixty thousand dollars in there.”
“I know. And I would’ve found out a way to get it to you. I just didn’t figure you’d want to hear from me. And honestly, once I set up things to deposit to your account automatically I didn’t really think about it much. I have all the papers and stuff at home for you. I’ll give them to you when we get there.” He ran his fingers through his hair, nervously.
“Dawson, that’s a lot of money. Are you sure you want me to have it?” I squinted at him.
“Izzy, you earned it. It’s money the label should’ve paid you over the years. I’m sorry I didn’t stick up for you and insist on it back then.”
“But don’t you need the money?” I couldn’t fathom him having that kind of money sitting in an account for me, out of sight and out of mind.
“No,” he answered with a laugh.
“Are you sure?”
His fingers tapped and swiped some more. “This is my savings account. At least the one for that bank. I’ve hit their limit.”
My eyes bugged out at all the zeroes in his account balance.
“I guess you don’t need what’s in that other account then,” I joked.
“Nope.” He planted his lips on mine for a quick kiss. “Now let’s eat.”
He got up and dashed back to the kitchen and brought in two plates piled with bacon and French toast. Then he went back for water bottles for both of us.
“Mmmm,” I moaned as I ate the first bite. “A girl could get used to this.”
“Good because I want to take care of you and spoil you.” He took a bite of his food.
“So, with the sales from the show and what’s in that account I set up for you, you’ll be able to pay off the hospital bill, right?” he asked.
“Yeah and have some left.”
“So, you could focus more on creating instead of doing portrait and event photography?”
“I guess you’re right.” I hadn’t really thought about it. Long ago, I’d accepted the fact I’d have to do the normal types of photography in order to make money. I’d have to adjust my perspective now that studio photography wasn’t going to be a requirement in my life anymore.
Chapter 20
Dawson
As we drove from LAX to my house, I was so nervous. After all this time, I was finally going to show Izzy the house I’d bought for her. For us, before everything went to hell.
Joe pulled up to the newly installed, top-of-the-line security gate and punched in the code on the keypad. Noiselessly, the iron structure swung inward, permitting us entry. Once we were through, a sensor made it close again.
As Joe circled to the front door, Deke turned to look at us over his shoulder. “You two stay here while I go inside and make sure everything is good.” He hopped out and disappeared into the house. After a few minutes, he came back signaling the house was clear.
The gate made me feel better about Izzy being here. I was still worried about her safety now that I’d vetoed my original plan of keeping my distance.
Izzy’s eyes grew large as we walked up to the front porch. “This is your house?” she asked in awe. “When we came in this direction, I thought we were going to your apartment. It’s like what, two streets over?”
“Yeah. I bought this place a while back,” I said vaguely. I didn’t want to spill the beans until I knew if she liked it or not.
“It’s beautiful.” Her head tilted back to take in the two-story, white stone structure. Pink flowering bushes were scattered about the small yard.
When we went inside, she spun around the entryway. Stained glass hung above the door. With the current position of the sun, it cast a kaleidoscope of colors across the bleached walls.
“You guys staying in for the rest of the day?” Joe asked me as he stood inside the foyer.
He smirked at Izzy’s reaction to the house. Deke sat our bags down next to the staircase.
“Yeah. We’ll hang here. Maybe order in,” I answered with a shrug.
“Sounds good. I’m in the pool house tonight if you guys need anything. Call me tomorrow if you need to leave the house,” Joe said as he walked out the front door, closing it softly behind him.
Once we were alone in the house, I turned to Izzy. “You want a tour, or do you want to relax?”
“Oh, I get to choose this time? Last time we were somewhere you wanted to show off, the tour was mandatory,” she teased with a grin on her lips.
“You’re right. Tour it is.” I linked her fingers with mine and tugged her to the living room.
I stayed back, trying to view the room with a critical eye. She ran her fingers over the back of my dark-colored sectional sofa. Stepping around the large square coffee table, she made her way to the windows. They overlooked the side yard and pool. The previous owners had turned the area into an oasis since the property had an ocean view but wasn’t beach front.
“I bet you spend all your time in the pool,” she gushed.
“Actually, I haven’t ever used it,” I admitted.
“Well, we’re going to change that,” she declared, turning back to face me.
She gasped when she took in the wall beside where I stood. In a position of importance above the mantle, was her Love in Paris painting.
Her eyes shimmered as she came up to me. “You bought my painting?”
“Yes,” I whispered. I prayed she wasn’t mad.
“Why? I would’ve given it to you for fr
ee.”
“I wasn’t the original offer on it. When I saw how torn you were about selling it, I beat the offer. I knew that spot would be perfect for it.” I rested my hands on her hips.
“How did you get it hung already?”
“When you’re willing to spare no expense, a lot can be accomplished,” I said sheepishly.
She wrapped her arms around me and squeezed tightly. “Thank you.”
Phew. She wasn’t mad.
“Come on. Let me show you the kitchen,” I said, tugging her through another doorway.
“Oh, my goodness.” The kitchen window revealed a sliver of ocean, which was what drew Izzy’s attention. She wandered around, trailing her fingers over the granite countertops and stainless-steel appliances. As she made her way to the table, my heart stopped. I should’ve put away the puzzle.
“What’s this?” she asked with a frown. “It looks like my painting. Only not quite.”
“It’s from the stalker. She’s been sending a few puzzle pieces in every letter for the last while. I only just got the last pieces after your accident. The whole thing didn’t have faces until then.”
Izzy leaned forward, tracing the X drawn over her face. I stepped up behind her and pulled her back into my arms. She trembled in my embrace.
“I see why you’ve been worried.”
“Yeah. But maybe now that it’s completed, she’s done,” I suggested half-heartedly.
We stayed frozen by the terror the puzzle incited for a few moments before I turned her away. “Let’s finish the tour.”
I decided to take her to my music room. From the doorway, my piano and guitar were visible. So was another couch. But the real surprise wouldn’t be revealed until she entered the room. Half of the room had twenty-foot ceilings. Along two of the tall walls, Izzy’s Fate’s Thread collection was displayed. I’d hired someone to install them yesterday. The extra time I spent in South Carolina was to ensure there was enough time for the pieces to arrive and be in place before Izzy got here.
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