by Lynn Ames
care; I didn’t have time to watch my usual television. So I listened to the radio instead. I never saw what Jamison Parker looked like.”
“What are you saying?” Alexa asked carefully, her stomach turning over.
“I don’t know if you remember, but there was a second woman in the car; she was dead at the scene. I was sure that woman was Jamison Parker. I knew she was Katherine Kyle’s lover, but I still didn’t know who you were. A psychologist friend of mine insisted that you needed to regain your memory on your own. If I hadn’t made the assumption about who you weren’t, I could have made the connection for you, and you might have…”
Although the words were jumbled, Jay understood their import.
“Don’t,” Jay said, putting her hands over her ears. “Don’t say it.” Her blood burned red-hot. She wanted to lash out, wanted to scream and rave.
She strode angrily out of the room, her whole body shaking with rage.
Jay returned several minutes later, feeling slightly more composed.
She found Terri standing in the middle of the room. There was agony and self-recrimination written in every line of her face. She felt the anger seep out of her. “It’s okay, Terri.” Jay approached her and enveloped her in a hug. “You didn’t know. You did your best to shelter me and keep me safe. I understand.”
“How can you?”
“I know you’ve done everything in your power to help me. You would never do anything intentionally to hurt me.” Jay held Terri tightly as the two women cried for opportunities lost and lives shattered.
“I want to tell you about Kate,” Jay said finally.
“Okay, are you sure?”
Jay nodded and began to pace. “I need to talk about her.” Jay’s eyes were pleading. “We met in college, but we didn’t get involved until May 1987. The governor of New York—the president now—presided over our commitment ceremony last December.”
“She was very beautiful,” Terri said.
“Yes. Gorgeous. But it wasn’t her looks that attracted me. Kate’s a hero, in every sense of the word.” Jay faltered but pressed on. “She’s honest, honorable, noble, strong, and she’s got a heart of gold.”
“She sounds very special.” Terri was careful to use the present tense this time since Jay had done so.
“Amazing. I’ve never known anyone like her.” Jay tried but couldn’t hold it together. “Poor Kate. All this time she’s been mourning me, and now that I can find my way home to her, it’s too late. If only I had figured it out sooner.” Jay stopped short. She didn’t want her words to make Terri feel any worse than she already did.
Lynn Ames
Terri sat watching the woman she had come to think of as a daughter and her heart broke. “I’m so, so sorry, Jamison.”
“Thanks,” Jay said hollowly. “My friends call me Jay, by the way.
You and Trystan have been so wonderful to me.” She had another pang as she thought of the last time she had seen her friend.
Terri watched Jay’s expressive face change when she mentioned Trystan. “You’re worried about my daughter?”
Jay nodded sadly. “Yes. I’m afraid I did something to upset her.
Something’s changed between us, and I don’t know what.”
Terri chewed her lower lip. “I think I do.”
Jay watched her walk to her bedroom with curious eyes.
Terri returned and stood awkwardly in front of Jay. She wasn’t sure what she could say to make this any easier, and she wished with all her heart that she could be doing this under happier circumstances. She held out her closed fist, turned her hand palm up, and opened her fingers to reveal the ring.
Jay looked up at her questioningly.
“I removed this from your finger the day you arrived. I was cleaning cuts and abrasions from your hands. I was afraid swelling would cause the ring to cut off your circulation. I’ve kept it for you in my jewelry box ever since.”
Jay slipped the ring on her finger. “Why didn’t you give it back to me before this, and what does it have to do with Trystan?”
“I’m sorry to have kept it from you. That psychologist friend I told you about indicated that the ring would most likely not restore your memory but might serve to upset you further—since you’d know you were married but you wouldn’t have any recollection to whom.”
“I see.” Silently, Jay wondered if the ring would have jarred her memory and if that had brought her home to Kate sooner, perhaps Kate would sti—no, she had to stop thinking that way. “What does that have to do with Trystan?”
Terri sighed. “I could see how much Trystan cared for you, and I wanted to make sure she didn’t falsely believe you were available to her in a romantic way.”
Comprehension started to dawn on Jay. “So you showed her the ring.”
“Yes. The other morning.”
“That’s why she ran out.”
“I’m afraid so.”
“That’s why she pushed me away.”
Terri nodded. “My daughter is a very sensitive girl, very caring. She would never take what doesn’t belong to her, no matter how much it hurt her.”
The Value of Valor
“You think Trystan’s in love with me?” Jay asked incredulously.
“I believe that if she isn’t already, she could be.”
“Oh, God. What a mess.” Jay buried her head in her hands.
“I’m afraid so.” Terri considered for a moment. “Jamison—Jay, what were you doing out here? Do you know?”
Jay nodded and accepted the tissue Terri offered her. “As you probably heard on the news, I’m a reporter for Time magazine. I did a story a while ago on Native American healing traditions. I was coming back out here because the culture fascinated me, and I wanted to do a larger story on the Navajo and the ways they carry on their traditions within the context of today’s society.”
“I see.” Terri debated how to proceed. “What do you remember of how you ended up in our care?”
Jay squinted her eyes in thought. “I was driving along when I noticed a car behind me. It stuck out because there didn’t seem to be any traffic on the road. It was a standard dark blue sedan.” She looked at Terri.
“You know, the kind undercover cops drive.”
Terri nodded.
“I didn’t think much of it until I stopped and picked up a woman whose boyfriend had dumped her out on the side of the road. I saw the whole thing. Poor woman was crying and shaking.” Jay looked up at Terri. “That was the other woman. I told her I would give her a ride to Chinle. That’s when I became suspicious of the other car.”
“Suspicious? Why?”
“Because when I pulled over, the sedan pulled over, too. Except the driver stayed back about a hundred feet or so. It was odd—like he was waiting for me. So when the woman got in, I sped up to see what the sedan would do. I thought maybe it was my imagination running away with me. But that car stayed with me. He was following me.”
“Yes, he was.”
“I-I don’t remember anything after that until I woke up in the clinic.”
Jay’s voice was shaking.
“Who was the other woman in the car with you? Did you get her name?”
“Oh,” Jay’s hand flew to her mouth. “No, I never did. She’s—she’s dead because of me.” Her voice trailed off as she tried to comprehend the enormity of what had happened.
“It’s okay, Jay. Everything’s going to be okay.”
Jay glanced back at the TV screen, where CNN was airing a package outlining Kate’s career. A stranger she didn’t even know had died because of her and so had Kate. Jay shook her head, a new wave of tears coursing down her cheeks. “No, it’s never going to be okay; it can’t be anymore.”
Lynn Ames
Kate didn’t want to risk going into a store and being recognized. If CNN was reporting her death, her face would be plastered all over the television for the rest of the day. Barbara had said Peter was looking for her and would call in.
Assuming he’d done so, it was likely he was on his way to Phoenix already.
She gauged the passengers as they waited for their luggage at baggage claim. Finally, she found what she was looking for. She watched as a tall, gangly teenager standing off by himself pulled a set of keys out of his pocket. He was clearly waiting for his luggage.
Casually, she approached him, watching as he openly appraised her.
“Hi,” she said, giving him her most seductive smile.
“Um, hi,” he answered awkwardly, standing up a little straighter.
“Waiting for your luggage?”
“Yeah.”
“Vacation?”
“School break.”
“Ah. Hey, I wonder if you could help me out. I’m in a bit of a bind here.”
“Sure.”
Kate was certain the boy would walk to Egypt for her if she asked.
“My luggage got lost and my car keys were inside. I wonder, if you’ve got a car, if you could drop me in Scottsdale.”
“Absolutely. My parents left my car in the short-term lot this morning.”
Kate hated lying and hated worse playing with the boy’s hormones, but she really had no choice. She waited with him for his luggage to arrive and followed him to the parking lot.
She folded herself into his beat-up Chevy Camaro and gritted her teeth as he drove like a maniac on 44th Street.
“Do you live here?” he asked.
“Part of the time,” Kate lied. She had told him her car keys were in her lost luggage; if she told the truth now, he would know she’d been lying before. To deflect any further questions about herself, she changed the subject. “Where do you go to school?”
“Back East. I’m sure you wouldn’t have heard of it. It’s a small, liberal arts college in Vermont.”
Kate couldn’t believe it. This could only happen to her. “Let’s see, there aren’t that many small liberal arts colleges in Vermont…Bennington, St. Michael’s…But you look smarter than that.”
She pretended to size him up, which made him blush. “Middlebury.”
The boy looked over at her, astonished. “You know it?”
The Value of Valor
“Yeah, a little bit.” She was nervous. She was one of the college’s more recognizable alumni; was it possible he didn’t know who she was?
“What’s your major?”
“Biology with a minor in geology.”
Kate breathed a sigh of relief. The fact that he was a science nerd worked in her favor. “What year are you in?”
“I’m a freshman.”
“What do you want to do when you get out?”
“I’m not really sure yet. I just think the sciences are cool.”
“You can pull over here.” Kate pointed to a spot by the curb at the intersection of McDonald Drive and Invergordon, around the corner from her destination. She didn’t want the boy to take her all the way to the mountain. The less he could figure out, the better.
“Are you sure?”
“Yep. Thanks.”
“Okay.”
As she was getting out, she asked offhandedly, “Can I trouble you for a couple more things?”
“Sure.”
“I don’t have any shorts in my house and I’m going to roast before I can get to a store. You’re about my size; got a pair of shorts in your bag you could part with? I’ll pay you for them.”
Kate watched as the boy’s mind derailed at the thought of her in his shorts. Thank God for boys and their hormones.
“You bet.” He jumped out of the car and ran around to the trunk.
“How about these?” He held up a pair of Middlebury gym shorts.
She smiled at him. “Perfect.”
“What was the other thing?”
“A pad of paper and a pen.”
“You got it.”
“How many agents do we have on the ground out there?” Wayne Grayson asked the Viper as they ate lunch in his private dining room. He especially liked that this room afforded him a view of the White House.
“Three are just about to touch down.”
“Just three?”
“They’re the best we have.”
“Okay. I want to make sure we’ve got Kyle’s funeral covered, too. It might be interesting to see who turns up to pay respects.”
“Are you expecting anyone in particular?”
“No, but it wouldn’t be the first time someone has attended her own funeral.”
Lynn Ames
“You think she might double back? I think that’s highly unlikely.
She’s too recognizable in this town.”
“Perhaps, but I still want to be prepared, just in case. As it is, she’s been on the loose too long. We don’t know that she hasn’t already made contact with someone.”
“Mmm. But we don’t know that she has, either.” The Viper realized his mistake as soon as the words were out of his mouth. He stiffened.
“I don’t like not knowing.” Grayson’s eyes flashed.
“Yes, sir. I’ll make sure we have a full complement of agents at the funeral the day after tomorrow.”
The Viper took his leave via the inside elevator from Grayson’s penthouse offices to an underground parking garage.
Jay wiped her eyes. After her discussion with Terri, she’d gone into her room to lie down for a while. She had tried to sleep, but visions of Kate had kept her awake. She didn’t know if she’d ever be able to sleep again. For now, she would take things one day, one hour, one minute at a time. CNN had reported that the funeral for Kate was to take place the day after tomorrow. She would be there. But first there was something she needed to do.
She blew her nose one last time, walked out of her room, and faced Terri, who was making tea in the kitchen. “I’m going to find Trystan.”
“Jay, give Trystan a little time. She needs to adjust. She’ll come back.”
“Unfortunately, I don’t have time to wait. I won’t leave here without seeing her and setting things right between us.”
“You’re planning on leaving?”
“Yes. Kate’s funeral is the day after tomorrow. I have to be there for it.”
“Jay,” Terri put a hand on her arm. “Do you know who tried to kill you?”
“What? N-no, I have no idea.”
“Then what makes you think it would be safe for you to go home?”
“I don’t know, Terri. All I know is that I can’t hide for the rest of my life, and frankly, I don’t really care at this point if they find me again. Let them.”
“Jay! You don’t mean that.”
“Actually, I do.”
“Well, if you don’t care, I do.” Terri’s nostrils flared in anger. “And so does Trystan.”
“I’m not so sure about that.”
“I am. You can’t take your safety so cavalierly.”
The Value of Valor
Jay thought for a moment. Terri had a point. By showing up at the funeral, she would be making herself an easy target. She could stay in the shadows and watch from a distance. Or better yet, she could call Peter; he’d know what she should do.
“May I use your phone?”
“Of course.” Terri stepped aside, her rigid posture a clear indicator that she was still upset. “I’ll give you some privacy.”
When she was alone, Jay dialed Peter’s number in Albany. The answering machine picked up on the fourth ring. She debated whether or not to leave a message, finally deciding that hearing her voice on the answering machine would be too jarring for him. He had enough to deal with. She’d just have to stay in the shadows and look for him at the funeral. She hung up and walked into the living room.
“I couldn’t reach my friend. It’ll be fine, Terri, I promise. Peter will take care of me as soon as I can find him.”
“Peter?” Terri wondered—could it be? She remembered the good-looking stranger who had questioned her about Jay. “What’s his last name? Can you describe him for me?”
Confuse
d, Jay complied.
Terri put her head in her hands.
“What’s the matter?”
“He was here.”
“Who was? Peter?”
“Yes.” Terri nodded. “He came several days after the accident. We didn’t know whom to trust. That’s why Trystan and I moved you to this house from the clinic.”
“You were hiding me from view.”
“Exactly. In case he was a bad man sent to finish the job.”
“Oh.” Jay tried not to think yet again about the fact that she could have been home weeks earlier. “Thank you for protecting me.”
“I’m so, so sorry, Jay. If I had known that he was your friend…”
Jay wrapped her arms around Terri and squeezed, trying her best not to think about the “what ifs.”
“How could you know? You did your best to keep me safe, and I’ll never forget it. I owe you my life.”
“You owe me nothing, child. I don’t think I’ll ever forgive myself for the mistakes I made.”
“Don’t,” Jay said around the lump in her throat. “You can’t change what is any more than I can. We’ll get through it together.” She gave Terri one last squeeze and let go. “I have to go find Trystan.” She squared her shoulders and headed for the door. “Wish me luck.”
“Good luck, Jay, although you won’t need it.”
Lynn Ames
Jay walked down the street to the small cottage she knew belonged to Trystan. She had no idea what she would say when she got there, but she knew she cared about Trystan and didn’t want to lose her as a friend.
As she got closer, she could see Trystan sitting on the front step, watching her approach. “Hi,” Jay offered.
“Hey yourself.” Trystan took one look at her friend and knew something had changed.
“Can I sit down?”
“Of course.” Trystan shifted left, giving Jay enough room to sit.
After several moments of awkward silence, Jay took a deep breath and jumped in. “I’ve missed you.”
“Yeah, well, I’ve been busy,” Trystan mumbled.
“If you’re not too ‘busy’ right now, I could sure use a friend.”
Trystan turned so she could get a good look at Jay. It was obvious that she’d been crying. “One friend reporting for duty.”
Jay smiled wanly. “I’ve had sort of a tough day.”