by Ali Olson
Actually it would probably be wonderful and involve having his arms around her again. Better not to risk that, because she didn’t think she could make the right decision again.
7
AARON HADN’T MOVED off the couch since she left. He was still staring at the door, willing her to open it again and come back inside. Finally, after a few minutes, he ran his fingers through his hair, leaned back against the couch and sighed. He didn’t know what was going on with him. This woman had him wrapped around her finger somehow, and his tendency to call the shots just completely disappeared when she was around.
He gave her a key. Was that weird? He’d never done that before. He’d met up with plenty of women in Vegas, but he never considered giving them a key to his room, or missing his big competition day of the NFR. Those were two firsts that he hadn’t expected.
Now that she was gone, though, there seemed no point in sitting around. Plus, he was going to be late if he didn’t get going. He texted Jeremiah and changed, but the image of her head in his lap was still swimming in front of his eyes.
He was going to be sorry to give up Jessica, but he was glad that the distance and anonymity would stop him from continuing to see her. She was mind-blowing, but he didn’t want to hurt her, and he was afraid that it would happen if they spent too much time together.
He had hurt women before, when they wanted more than he was willing to give. He didn’t believe in true love and marriage and all that, at least not for him, and it had caused a few rough moments from time to time. That was why he liked to be clear about the situation up front, and what could be more clear than a two-day expiration date?
He exited the hotel room, heading down to Jeremiah’s. There was still something about Jessica, though, that was eating at him. There was something under her confidence, her slight hesitancies, that made him think she was unavailable.
He tried to tell himself it didn’t matter. She could make her own decisions, and it was one weekend. He shouldn’t press the issue or try to get involved. Still, he would never knowingly help someone cheat. He’d need to figure out what to do about that before he saw her in the evening.
Thinking of her walking into his room sent shivers down his spine, and he had to forcibly shift his attention so he could knock on Jeremiah’s door and get this whole thing out of the way without any big issues.
Jeremiah answered as soon as he knocked; he’d clearly been waiting for him. Aaron suddenly felt guilty about his treatment of his friend. “Hey, man,” he began, “I’m sorry about this whole thing—”
“It’s fine,” Jeremiah responded coldly.
Aaron felt even worse. He’d been such an ass that he’d made Jeremiah, the perennially happy friend he’d had since grade school, pissed off at him.
They began walking to the elevators. “No, seriously, I’m sorry.” He didn’t really want to explain but realized he didn’t have a choice if he wanted to fix this. “So, I met this girl, and everything just kind of spiraled out of hand. I’ve got things under control now, though.”
That was a lie, he thought. If she called him up, begging him to come back to her, he didn’t think he had it in him to say no. Since she had tossed his number, though, it seemed unlikely.
Jeremiah immediately perked up at his explanation. “Yeah? She was that hot, huh?”
Aaron looked into his friend’s gleaming eyes and told the truth. “Hotter.”
Jeremiah whistled a long, low whistle. “A girl hot enough to make you almost miss our bet. That’s a big deal. I’d like to meet her.”
As the elevator door dinged shut, Aaron admitted, “You did. She was the girl I talked to outside Sapphire. She was one of the bachelorette-party girls. And she was the one I saw at the airport.”
Jeremiah’s face showed his incredulity. “Seriously? Those were all the same girl? Some tall brunette, right?”
“More red than brunette, but yeah. The same girl.”
“Sounds like fate wants you two together. When’s the wedding? She better not wear heels, because as the best man, I shouldn’t be shorter than the bride.”
For some reason, Jeremiah’s teasing bothered Aaron more than it usually would have. A surge of annoyance flashed through him, but he managed to keep his voice steady. “You know it’s not like that. It’s just a weekend thing. I don’t even know where she lives.”
Jeremiah shrugged. “She’s from New York, probably, if she’s with the bachelorette party. They’re all from there. Marilyn wouldn’t stop talking about it. Apparently it’s the best city ever. It was worth listening to her, though.”
As Jeremiah continued talking about his date in more or less graphic detail, Aaron drifted into his own thoughts. Now he knew where she was from. Was that really so bad? He couldn’t expect them to keep everything about themselves quiet, and he had already mentioned Texas. He’d felt stupid after letting it slip, but she had to have guessed before he said anything. He was at the rodeo, after all.
He could see her walking around New York. She’d be able to handle that big city with her cool confidence and powerful stare.
In a way, it was good to know where she called home. She was from a huge city thousands of miles away from where he lived. There wasn’t even the slightest possibility they’d run into each other later. Good, because thinking he might bump into her one day would likely drive him crazy.
Aaron tried to refocus his mind, to listen to Jeremiah. He’d been a pretty lousy friend before, and didn’t want something as little as a weekend fling to get between them. Even if the woman in question was stunning. And interesting. And completely captivating. And it didn’t feel little.
He needed to pull himself together.
Finally Jeremiah stopped talking as they walked through the noisy casino and out into the fresh air. The rodeo was held at the Thomas and Mack Center on the university campus, just a couple of blocks away. They made their way along the sidewalks filled with people in cowboy hats and boots, all heading to the same destination.
He became lost in deliciously inappropriate thoughts about what he might do that evening to surprise Jessica. He wanted to make her smile. Jeremiah’s voice cut through his thoughts, startling him. “Is this all because of that girl, or is there something else going on?”
Aaron was bewildered. He knew he’d been a little distracted, but was he acting that strange? “Nothing’s going on. Why?”
“You’ve been acting really weird since you met her. Not in a good way. Have you spent more than five minutes since you saw her without thinking about her?”
Aaron paused for a minute, embarrassed.
“Yeah, I didn’t think so. That’s dangerous, man. You don’t want some girl taking over your life, especially if you live, like, three thousand miles away from her. You don’t want to do anything stupid.”
Aaron nodded. Jeremiah was right. “Yeah. I’ve been too distracted. It’s just a fun weekend thing. When we leave on Tuesday, I’ll be getting on the plane without a second glance. Sorry if I’ve been a jerk.”
Jeremiah slapped him on the back and grinned. “It’s no problem. I just don’t want you to abandon your life, sell the land and run off to New York or anything.” He laughed at his joke.
Aaron chuckled, too, a knot twisting in his gut. He’d never do something that stupid. Leaving his whole life for a girl could only end in disaster, and he knew that. He’d seen it happen before. His mom had been a wreck when his dad went running off after true love, and look how well that worked out for him.
No, Aaron knew that “love” meant giving up your happiness, your independence, your life. There was no way he was going to let anything like that happen to him. He was just having fun with Jessica. After he went back home, he would continue on his own as he’d been doing for years.
He liked his life just the way it was. It got a little lone
ly sometimes, eating dinner alone or with a few buddies, but there were enough women who knew his boundaries and were happy to keep him company for a while to break up the monotony.
The thought of those women left a weird taste in his mouth, and the “fun” he’d been having with them suddenly seemed less fun.
Aaron walked beside Jeremiah into the arena the city had prepared for the many competitions and events included in the annual rodeo. It felt like a football stadium, huge and crowded, but the smell was definitely rodeo. Hay and horses and dirt. That smell meant home to him.
Better to focus on the here and now, to enjoy the competitions, than to think about his choices. He didn’t like the way it felt to think about all that other stuff. It was better to just not worry about the future. Everything would go back to normal when he got out of Vegas.
It was impossible to feel normal in Vegas, he told himself.
As if to solidify that fact, a buxom fake blonde tapped him on the shoulder and smiled widely at him. The bad taste in his mouth intensified as he recognized Olivia, his semiregular rodeo companion. His mind went blank, and he couldn’t think of anything to say to her. Luckily she was the one to break the silence.
“Aaron! I can’t believe you haven’t even texted me. You have to have been in town for at least a day or two, right?” He didn’t answer, but evidently she wasn’t looking for a reply. “Let’s go find your seat and watch the fun. I can spend a little while with you before I have to get back to my group. Where’s Jeremiah?”
That was one he could answer. He pointed to his friend standing near the stairs that led to their seats. He was talking to a group of guys Aaron recognized from previous years, probably telling them how well his team would be doing this year. Olivia bounced over to Jeremiah and gave him a friendly hug. Aaron couldn’t hear what she was saying, but he could tell it was something bubbly and enthusiastic. He knew he should walk up to them, but he didn’t particularly want to.
Over her shoulder, Jeremiah looked at him and raised his eyebrows. It was a small gesture, but enough to let Aaron know what his friend was thinking. What was he going to do about her? Aaron shrugged in return. He just didn’t know. She wasn’t the kind of woman to get hurt feelings, but he didn’t want to have to explain anything about Jessica if he didn’t have to. It wouldn’t make any sense if he tried, anyway.
And there was no way Olivia would be coming back to his room that evening. After all, Jessica was going to be there. Well, was probably going to be there. He didn’t even have her phone number, so she could just not show up.
He felt a second of cold panic at the thought of her disappearing without a word, but it was gone in a flash. She was going to come back. He’d seen it in her eyes when he gave her the key card.
Even if she wasn’t, Olivia was really too fake for him. Her hair, her boobs, her laugh, even her personality were all fake. He wanted a real woman. One who wasn’t afraid to be seen without makeup, who said what she honestly thought, who actually thought things. He wasn’t sure why he’d spent so much time around Olivia in the past.
He watched as she hooked her arm through Jeremiah’s, allowing him to usher her toward their seats. Jeremy looked back at him and gestured with his head toward the stairs that led to the rows of seats. Apparently Aaron had hung back long enough.
He slowly walked toward them, following their progress without attempting to catch up. He didn’t want to be there. Back in his room, with Jessica resting her head on his lap, he’d felt relaxed and happy. Now he was dreading the next few hours of small talk and smiling as Olivia flung herself against him every time something happened in the arena.
He knew he couldn’t abandon Jeremiah there—he had some decency—but he’d have to come up with something to tell Olivia so she wouldn’t think she was going back to the hotel with him. By the time he got to his and Jeremiah’s seats, Olivia was already in a full-blown story about something exciting and amazing that had happened to her, and Aaron had to keep from rolling his eyes. She was also sitting in his seat, leaving him to sit in somebody else’s until they arrived or Olivia decided to leave. He hoped it was the latter, and soon.
He sat down. Olivia only noticed enough to flash him a smile and turn herself slightly so her story was directed at both of them, but she didn’t seem to notice his mood.
What was wrong with him? He’d always known she was a little shallow and not exactly a person you’d want to spend hours talking to, but he’d never thought of her in this “dear God, get me away from her” way. He didn’t want to think about what that might mean for his life back at home. Some of the women he spent time around were interesting and could keep up their end of a conversation, but most of those had settled down with some other guy and moved on.
Actually even quite a few of the less-interesting ones had, too. Now that he was in his late twenties, the pool of eligible women who weren’t looking for a serious relationship had dwindled to a muddy puddle. How had he not noticed that?
He angled himself away from the chattering woman next to him and focused on the show, hoping she’d take the hint that he wasn’t interested without making him come up with some excuse or shooting her down completely—knowing Olivia’s personality as well as he did, though, he doubted it would work. Catching on wasn’t one of her strong suits. And if he was going to break things off with her, he wanted to do it somewhere private, which just wasn’t possible at the moment. The place was packed and getting more crowded every second.
“Isn’t that hilarious, Aaron?” she asked, gripping his arm for a moment.
He smiled at her and nodded, trying his best not to be a total dick.
Below them, in the center of the arena, a few workers were preparing for the first competition of the evening, checking the hard-packed dirt floor for anything that might hurt the riders or animals. Bull riding was the main event, the last of the evening, but before that there was the bareback bronc competition, and then team roping. What he and Jeremiah were there for.
Their teams had been preparing for this all year, and whatever Jeremiah said about his team, Aaron knew his pair of riders were the best. He could picture them, working in perfect synchronicity to rope their steer, the header’s rope looping around the steer’s horns a split second before the heeler tossed his around the steer’s back legs, tightening them at the same moment. They had been working together for years, and moved as one person, as if they were in each other’s minds.
With any luck, they would make it into the top three, maybe even get first place if the horses were steady enough to try the trick they’d been working on the past couple of months. A tenth of a second could mean the difference between a win and a loss here.
Aaron could still hear Olivia chattering away, but he kept his attention on the arena, watching the first competitor mount the bronco being held still behind the gate. In just a few seconds, he would be let loose, and the cowboy would need to hold on for eight seconds with only one hand on the horse that was trying to buck him off.
A snap of a latch and the gate was open. The bronco ran the arena, using his entire body to try to knock the man off his back. Olivia gasped and clutched at his arm, hiding her eyes against his shoulder.
Aaron pictured Jessica there beside him. He could imagine it perfectly, her body tilted forward as she studied the movements of the bronco and the rider, working to figure out what tiny adjustments the cowboy would need to make in order to stay on and get the highest number of points.
It was foolish thinking, and he tried to put it out of his head. What would ever make her interested in watching rodeo events? She was from New York—rodeo probably seemed silly and pointless to her. If in some alternative universe she went with him to a rodeo, she would hate it, most likely.
He couldn’t get himself to believe that, though. Her competitive nature was too strong for her to dismiss it all out of hand, and she just s
eemed like the type of person who was interested in anything that could be seen as a puzzle. That was what he always liked about these competitions himself.
The buzzer sounded and the cowboy’s eight-second ride was over. Rodeo clowns swarmed the arena, helping the cowboy gain control of the horse.
“Not a bad ride,” Jeremiah commented over Olivia’s head.
Aaron agreed. The man’s style was too choppy for a score much higher than the mid-eighties, but it was decent. The people cheered and shouted, and the announcer’s voice boomed as the next rider climbed into the chute. Olivia continued to clutch at his arm. He wished the owner of his seat would get there quickly.
She squeezed his arm a little tighter and talked to him in a whisper that could be heard by anyone in a five-foot radius. “Do you want to make some plans for when all this is done? I’m free all night.”
She smiled at him. He knew that even just the year before he’d thought she had a sexy seductive smile, but it just looked too forced to be intriguing. For the first time since meeting her nearly five years ago, he wondered what she was really like under all the layers of show.
He didn’t want to hurt her, but he couldn’t think of anything to say. She watched him expectantly as he racked his mind for a response.
He needed to say something, but nothing even halfway decent came to him. Finally he just said, “I can’t,” while he tried to decide the nicest way to tell her that it wasn’t going to happen.
She frowned, but perked up after a second or two. “Okay, well, let me know if you’re still in town tomorrow and maybe we’ll be able to spend time together. It would be a shame to let a whole year go by before we...catch up.”
He had to explain to her that they wouldn’t be “catching up” this year, or any future ones for that matter. “Yeah, so Olivia...” he began, trying to find the right words.