by Alexie Aaron
I pointed a fork at him. “You’re on my list.”
“You have a list?” he questioned. “I have lists, and you’re on a few of them, along with Harry.”
“Hey, don’t go lumping me in with her,” Harry warned. “We may be partners, but we are two very different people.”
Alex walked in the kitchen sleepy-eyed.
“About time you got up,” Harry commented.
“I was up all night too,” he said, taking a plate and heaping on several large servings of the casserole.
“Hello, Dave,” my son said.
“Good to see you, Alex. Wait, I’ve got a question for you.”
“Shoot.”
“Don’t say that to Buslowski. He’s armed,” Harry warned.
Dave looked at him sourly. “What I wanted to ask you is, what do you think of Meyer?”
“He’s a good guy. I think he’s gay, not that there is anything wrong with that, but I’m not sure that he’s out of the closet. That’s sad,” Alex commented. “He’s an excellent drummer. He’s been making a lot of money at Disney World. He offered to get me a job there, but I told him I was going back to school this fall and thanked him anyway. Those Disney gigs are hard ones to get.”
“I heard that,” I said. “We have several band members who’ve tried to get in. The background checks are pretty tough.”
“I wonder how Meyer got in if he has form?” Harry asked.
“Maybe he lied,” I said.
“More likely he didn’t and explained the situation of each incident,” Buslowski said.
“Ah, I sense you already looked into it,” Harry said.
Dave smiled.
“You’re a very good investigator,” I said.
“I try to be.”
“So I imagine you’ve run Cin’s name a time or two,” Harry asked.
“Oh, she’s on my daily sheet.”
I forgot myself and hauled off and whacked him hard on the upper arm.
“That’s assaulting a police officer,” Harry said.
“Indeed it is, son.”
“Mom, you’re on your own,” Alex said, returning to his room.
“What are you going to do, cuff me again?” I sassed.
“No, but I think,” he said, getting off his stool and grabbing me, “with Harry’s help, I think you need to cool off,” he said, throwing me over his shoulder.
That traitor Harry opened the sliding door. Buslowski walked out with me and tossed me in the deep end of the pool. I couldn’t help laughing at my predicament and swallowed a little water on the way down. The pool’s lights were off, and the dark water was somewhat comforting. Without the lights on, I could see the stars overhead. I floated on my back, enjoying the warm feeling I got from the attention I was receiving from Buslowski. I stayed in the pool. I was too tempted to take my revenge which would have landed me back in the pool. Buslowski was a strong guy. He walked into the cabana bathroom and brought out a washcloth.
“While you’re in there, how about washing off that eyeliner. You look like a…”
“Don’t,” I warned him as he bent down to hand me the cloth.
“Slut,” he enunciated slowly.
I grabbed his arm and pulled him in. Unfortunately, it was on top of me. We both broke the surface at the same time. Harry was laughing as he brought out two beach towels. He then left us.
“Kind of glad I don’t have to go back to work, Cin,” Dave said as he took off his shoes, drained the water out of them and set them on the pool deck. Next came his shirt. He twisted the water out of it and tossed it next to his shoes.
“Gee, I hope you stop there, pal. My kid’s in there.”
“Don’t worry, Cin. I’m just getting more comfortable.” With that comment, off came the pants. Fortunately, he had on boxers. “That’s better. Now how did I end up here in the first place?”
“You called me a slut.”
“No, I said your makeup made you look like one.”
“That was six shades of unkind, Buslowski.”
He swam over and trapped me against the wall of the pool. “When I walked in that bedroom and saw you in his jacket, holding onto his hand, with those cat eyes of yours challenging me, I could have spanked you.”
“Um, I was cold, and Mandy did my makeup prior to her mother being killed.”
“Why?”
“I cried mine off when I was told Sidney’s cancer was back.”
“The guy who dumped you?”
“One in the same. Turns out he’s fine. Someone may have falsified the report Tom got.”
“Oh, baby, you have had a bad day.” He asked, “How long had you been dating?”
“Well…” I hedged then mumbled, “a day, two at the most.”
He was visibly surprised. It took a moment, but he calmed down and looked at me. He ran his finger along my cheekbone. “I suppose you slept with him.”
“That’s none of your business.”
“But if it were my business?”
“I hadn’t had sex for three years,” I explained. “That’s twenty-one in dog years.”
“I thought you and the priest…”
“Um, he’s a priest, and I don’t think of him that way,” I lied.
His caressing finger stopped on my chin. “How do you think of me, may I ask?”
Time out! My brain screamed. Here I was, with this ruggedly handsome man pressed up against my body. The chemistry had always been there, but if I succumbed to his advances and had sex with him, that would be two men in three days, which would make me a major slag. If I’m already on Hell’s waiting list, this would seal the deal. On the other hand, aside from Sidney, I hadn’t had any sex for three years…
“Aren’t you still married?” I asked.
“Divorced, papers were signed yesterday. That’s why…”
“You came to borrow my ladder,” I realized.
“You still haven’t answered me.”
“What was the question?” I stalled, wiggling, trying to escape, which only trapped me further.
“How do you think of me?”
“Well… I have a very high regard for your investigative abilities.”
“Cin,” he growled.
“Okay, I’m attracted to you and have been since you sat your butt down in my living room and started profiling. But, Dave, you were married.”
“Well, I’m not now. Do I have a chance with you?”
“I’ve just been dumped, I’m drunk, and I could be using you. The boys are home and…”
He kissed me. This wasn’t a I’m-going-to-seduce-you type of kiss, it was an I-own-you type of kiss. And, at that moment, he did. It erased all my objections. I saw myself proudly going to Slags Anonymous meetings.
The kitchen door slider opened, and Harry called out, “Alex and I are going to Musictown and then to the movies. If you’re going to make a move on her, Buslowski, you have three hours in which to get up your courage. Thank you and goodnight,” Harry said and shut the door.
“I’m going to kill him,” I said.
“Do you know what I’m thinking?” he asked.
“I’m afraid to find out,” I answered.
“I’m thinking that three hours isn’t enough time for what I’m thinking,” he said as he scooped up one of my ruined, waterlogged shoes and tossed it on the pool deck. He took off the other one which was most difficult as I had wrapped my legs around him. He kissed me again, this time he didn’t hesitate to illicit a response from me. He was demanding, and I was so turned on. I don’t know how we made it inside, but soon I found myself naked with Dave tracing every scar of mine with his fingers first and then his kisses. I regretted not having more scars.
Chapter Thirteen
I rolled off of Dave and onto my back. Both of us were panting for air. I was going to be sore in the morning. In no way was I prepared for what we had been doing for the last hour. Nor could I stop wanting to do it again and again.
“I think I’m going to kill
us both,” I said once I could speak.
“It’s a great way to go,” Dave said, rolling on his side so he could look at me. “You’re a beautiful woman, Cin.”
“Um, you can stop the compliments. I’m totally hooked.”
He laughed. “I’m just calling it like I see it.”
“I thought you said I looked like a slut?”
“I was just mad at you.”
“Me? What did I do?”
“Got yourself involved with musicians.”
“I am a musician,” I reminded him.
“Well that explains your loose morals.”
I rolled on my side and looked at him. I knew he was teasing, but probably there was more than a grain of truth in what he just said. “Haven’t you ever just had enough of being good? Haven’t you ever wanted to just let go and…”
He lifted an eyebrow.
I laughed. “That’s how we got here.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
I looked at him and could tell he either wanted to lecture me about something or yell at me. “Go ahead, get it off your chest.”
“What’s going on with you? You’re reckless. Sidney Stoneridge?”
I rolled onto my back and stared up at the ceiling. “I can’t explain Sidney. I fell for his line, and I guess I pitied the guy. I felt a connection with him. I knew he was fighting cancer and…”
“You wanted to save him.”
“Yes.”
“You can’t save him.”
“I know. He indicated as much. He’s not a bad guy, but he was only interested in a short fling. I know that now, Dave. I’ve been surrounded by unavailable men, and he was free.”
“I’d be lying to you if I told you that it didn’t bother me that you hooked up with somebody.”
“It’s not like you and I have a relationship, bud. Where have you been since you moved out?”
“Getting a divorce. I didn’t want to approach you until I was free,” he explained.
“Well, you should have communicated. I can’t change the past, Dave. I was married, and then I wasn’t. That almost crushed me. I haven’t hooked up with anyone but Sidney. I’m not going to regret that.”
“Are you finished?”
“Yes.”
He reached over and turned my face. “I’m an ego-driven male, insecure under the sheets.”
“You shouldn’t be.”
“I don’t like being compared.”
“Who’s comparing you? But if I were…”
He leaned over and kissed me.
“You’d win.”
“I don’t want this to be a temporary thing,” he said.
“Whoa, big boy, we’ve just crossed the friend barrier. Let’s take it slow.”
“I’m not explaining myself clearly, am I?”
“Go ahead, talk. I promise not to get too distracted,” I said, reaching for him.
He caught my hand and pinned it down. “Cin, I find you the most fascinating woman I’ve ever met, but I’m not the type of guy who can share you physically with anyone, even if he’s dying.”
“That’s over,” I said.
“What if he’s regretting his decision and tries to get you back.”
“That won’t happen,” I said, confident that I’d put that behind me.
“What I’m asking is that you be honest with me.”
“Um, that, kind of, is a lot to ask. Sometimes in an investigation…”
“I’m not talking about work. Well, maybe I am. But, Cin, if you feel like moving on, talk to me first. Otherwise, I’m yours.”
“As long as you do the same. Remember, you’ve just been freed. Don’t tie yourself down so fast. I don’t want a caged rabbit.”
“I have to ask you about Father Michael.”
I twisted out of his grip. I got up. “I don’t want to talk about Michael.”
“What happened that night when you went to see him with the diamonds?” he asked.
I reached for my robe and put it on, twisting the sash until I felt the tightness around my middle. I walked around the bed and sat down next to him. “He called me as I was leaving band practice. He was high on pain medication. I was feeling the music and feeling too good to go home and face an empty house. So I thought, what the hell, I had to return the diamonds anyway. I almost turned around, but he was waiting for me at the door. Dave, he and I’ve always had a connection, which I find strange considering his occupation. Anyway, I thought, what could happen? The guy had on a cast from hip to toe, surely I could outrun him.”
Dave took a few pillows and put them behind him. He eased back, never taking his eyes off my face.
“He led me to the balcony where he had a pitcher of Manhattans already made. He knows me. I was walking into temptation. I knew I was. He professed his love for me, and he asked for me to do the same. I wouldn’t. He offered to leave the clergy if I did one thing, and as of yet, I haven’t done it. I left him there in the moonlight, and honestly, Dave, I knew I did the right thing. His brain was scrambled from the pain meds. I’m sure he never intended to tell me his heart.”
“What was the condition?”
“I had to abandon Harry,” I said. “Remember when I asked you if Harry would ever leave?”
“Oh yes. I can see your attachment and affection for the kid. I’m not bothered by it.”
“Dave, Michael is the knight in a Jesuit collar, which is romantic, and I love him. He doesn’t ignite passion, and I’m a passionate person.” At that moment, I started to doubt my words, so I asked him, “Am I making any sense?”
“Thank you for being honest with me, and I do understand. Now’s my turn to be honest with you.”
“Uh oh,” I said, getting a sinking feeling.
“When I met you, my marriage was crap. My wife wanted things from me I didn’t want. She wanted retirement and grandchildren. I really didn’t want to leave the military, but I did want to try and save my marriage. Our daughter Maureen wanted the wedding of her dreams, and it depleted our savings, so I convinced my wife that I needed to go back to work.”
“When I arrived at this house to see it covered with Oleander blossoms and spied you on the porch sitting there, watching everything and everyone in your pajamas, I was fascinated. Tony let me sit in and play profiler, but it was damned hard with you there, emitting this air of vulnerability and yet strength. I had the opportunity to see your and Harry’s interactions. He’s good and bad for you, but he is for everybody. I like the kid. I can see the draw.”
“It’s because of you, Harry is still here,” I said. “You advised me. I listened to you.”
“I said he was never going to leave you because you’re too exciting. You are. I’ve wanted to make love to you since the first day I met you. I tried to rid you from my mind. But you called me and drew me into the terrorists’ thing.”
“I knew that Michael wasn’t in the hospital,” I blurted out. “I lied to you.”
He smiled. “Cin, I knew that. It made me angry, the dangerous game you were playing. I didn’t know why I was so mad at you, but I know now. I realized it when I saw you on the beach defending the crime scene last night. I knew it wasn’t just Harry who needed me there, it was you. Once again, you called me. You were standing with Stoneridge. You, barefoot and fierce, and him, embarrassed by the whole thing. I wanted to punch him. Why? Because I had to admit I was in love with you.”
“I don’t know what to say…”
“I know you don’t love me yet, but you will,” he promised. “I’m going to fight for you, Cin. I know I’m not the handsome Michael or the exciting pilot or the vulnerable Stoneridge, but I guarantee that you’re not going to find anyone who loves you more than I do. Not even Harry. I don’t want to cage you, but I want the chance to make you love me.”
“I’m a lot of trouble.”
“Yes, but worth it,” he assured me. “Give me a chance. You can keep Harry,” he said, making his eyebrows go up and down.
I couldn’t help lau
ghing. “No chains or thumb cuffs.”
“No chains, but I can see the use of the cuffs from time to time,” he said saucily.
“Don’t you dare,” I warned him.
“Think about it. Give me your answer in the light of day,” he advised. “I’ve got nothing to offer you but my heart. The divorce broke me, and I have to work to survive. I’m not offering you a diamond, just my love and protection. I’ll keep you safe.”
“Alright, let’s see what happens. Just talk to me, Dave. Don’t punish me for things until I know what I did. Chances are, they weren’t deliberate on my end.”
It was his turn to laugh. He reached over and pulled me onto his lap. “Let’s seal this with a kiss.”
I leaned in and kissed him. Was I doing the right thing? Probably not. Did I want Buslowski? Oh yes. I cared for him, but I wasn’t in love with him. Would time change that? I didn’t know, but I was willing to give him time to convince me.
~
Dave left before Harry and Alex got back. He must have found and worn his wet clothes home, wherever home was. I didn’t know because I didn’t ask. I stumbled out to the pool deck. My legs were tired. I found my discarded clothing and threw them in the washer. I walked into the kitchen to find all his notes gone. It was as if he was never here in the first place. I walked into the den and hit play on the answering machine. Noelle was checking in. I would call her in the morning. Would I tell her about Buslowski? Maybe. The other call was from Sidney. It was short and sweet. “Harry, Cin asked me to tell you the lab results, and as I suspected, the cancer is still in remission.” He hung up, leaving no “Say hi to Cin,” or any other endearments.
“Asshole,” I said, irritated, my ego still bruised. I walked into my bedroom and thought about changing the sheets but decided I wanted to smell Dave on my pillowcase. I crawled into bed and fell into an exhausted sleep.
~
A pounding on the door woke me up. “What?”
“Come on, Cin, wake up, we’ve got stuff to discuss.”
It was Harry.
I crawled out of bed and unlocked the door. I opened it a foot. “Go away.”
He smiled and tried to look beyond me.
“He isn’t here.”