by Delia Roan
Wanting her is selfish.
“All that matters is that it’s you,” she whispered. “You and me.”
Her mouth returned to his, and her kiss deepened. The top of his head felt like it might float away. He was dizzy and grounded all at once. Her fingers undid the clasp at the collar of his robe, and her hand slipped inside his shirt to caress his chest. Blood roared through his ears, drowning his concerns in desire.
Selfish. So, so selfish.
“Say yes,” she whispered against his lips, “because I loved you before I even knew your name.”
He didn’t bother to reply. With a groan, he snapped open his robe and shrugged it off behind him. He wrapped his arms around Jenna’s waist and pulled her down onto the bed, until she lay atop his discarded coat.
Crawling across the mattress, he settled on top of her and pressed the length of his aching erection against her hip until he felt he might explode.
Nothing wrong with being selfish once in a while.
“Is that a yes?” She giggled, biting her lip.
“I believe,” he said, moving aside the towel between them, “you can consider that a yes.”
She ran her hands over the thin fabric of his shirt, lifting it up so she could touch his back. He shuddered as electricity danced across his spine. He dropped his hand to her chest, marveling at the softness and smoothness of her skin. Her nipples stiffened when he nuzzled against the curve of her breasts. Her back arched when he grazed his fingers over her ribs.
The sweet scent of her wrapped around him. Her fingers entwined with his braids, and the tips of her nails scraped against his scalp, sending shocks down his body and deep into his pelvis, where they stoked the fires burning within.
She should not have such power over me.
Yet, she always had. From the first frightened glance she had given him, he had been lost. He shaped his whole life for this woman, based only on a chance meeting years ago.
“I want you,” she murmured. “Don’t make me wait.”
When his palm skimmed over her belly, she quivered. He slipped his hand lower. Over the years, he’d read about human physiology to learn all he could about Jenna’s species. Bookish learning could only take him so far. When he met the wetness between her legs, he felt a renewed surge of desire.
That is for me.
“Oh!”
The sound of delight incited his hand to be bolder, to make her cry out again. The muscles in her thighs tightened as he explored her slick folds. He drove his tongue into her mouth, tasting the sweetness of her moans.
More. I must have more.
She lifted her knee to his side, pressing her toes into the muscles of his leg, and opening herself up to his probing. He slipped a finger inside her, and she groaned and arched her back. She was soft and slick and the scent of her arousal made his head spin. He was intoxicated by her breathing, and by the way her pulse fluttered in her neck, by the way her eyes filled with hunger.
Hunger for him.
He’d been patient.
He couldn’t wait any longer.
The languid love-making could happen later, when they’d sated themselves. Right now, need consumed him, and consumed them both. He wanted her. He had to have her. He loosened the ties of his pants, releasing his cock. Her hand fumbled over his length and her eyes widened.
“I-” Her words dried up.
Kovos shook his head. “No, I will not allow you to doubt this moment. This is right. You and me. We are right.”
Her brow furrowed, but nodded. A wicked gleam flashed in her eye, and she stroked her hand over his member, flicking her fingers over his sizzling skin. Where her fingertips trailed, ice followed, sending him into splendid agony. Kovos dropped his head into her hair and groaned.
It was selfish, he admitted, but if he couldn’t be inside her at this very moment, he would die.
“Jenna,” he whispered as a flush of victory spread across her cheeks. “You are my world.”
He slid a hand under her and hitched her hips upward. She lifted her other knee, cradling him within her legs. He positioned himself and slipped into her in one smooth motion. Jenna gasped, and her eyes flew open. At her wince, he stopped, bracing himself on his elbows.
“Are you okay?”
She nodded, but bit the corner of her lip. “Give me a minute.”
I’ll give her all my minutes, for the rest of my life.
She dropped her hand to her crotch, and her fingers worked. Her lids fluttered closed once more, and her breathing sped up. The sensations traveling up his body threatened to overwhelm him. The flesh might fly off his bones at any moment.
“So close,” she panted.
When she arched her back and moaned his name, he couldn’t take any more. He moved his hips, thrusting into her, first cautiously and then speeding up when her nails dug into his bicep. The heat between them burned away her misgivings. This was where he belonged. When he reached his climax, he thought for certain he had died.
His heart stopped.
In the silence, he looked down at Jenna’s face. She stared back with heavy eyes. A half smile tugged at her lips, and a pink blush marked her cheeks. Her lips moved, mouthing his name, but he heard nothing but the certainty inside his own soul.
Mine.
From now on, when he brought her face to mind, he wouldn’t remember the broken girl, but the languid woman beneath him. The reality of the night’s events rushed back. He’d almost lost her. He’d almost lost his Jenna. With a trembling hand, he traced her face.
Mine.
I would die without her.
With a clap, his heart restarted.
The strength fled from his body. He collapsed on top of Jenna, his weight pinning her to the bed. He felt shaky and sick, blissful and happy. He felt like his flesh and bones might melt away until he flowed into Jenna and they became one.
“Kovos,” she whispered into his ear.
“Hmm?”
“Thanks for saying yes.”
“Hmm…?” He could hear the ‘but’ coming. He could hear it in her voice.
“But you’re squishing me. Roll over, big guy.”
Yes, he would die without her.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
JENNA
Before Jenna opened her eyes the next morning, she took stock of herself. For the first time, in a long time, maybe even years, despite the ache in her muscles and the grumble of hunger in her belly, she was happy. Completely, utterly and perfectly happy.
Sunlight filtered through her eyelids, sending patterns of light across her vision. She turned her head from the sun, and snuggled further into Kovos’s arms, letting his heat push away the chill of the morning air. He murmured something, which must have been a jumble of random syllables, because the translator remained quiet in her ear.
“What’s that, love?” Jenna said, her voice heavy with sleep. She cracked open an eye to see if Kovos would repeat himself.
A stranger lay in her bed. An Ennoi stranger.
With a shriek, Jenna catapulted from the bed, pulling the sheets with her to cover her nudity. Her back slammed into the far wall.
The Ennoi awoke with a bellow, and rolled to his feet on the other side of the bed.
“What is it?” His eyes darted around the room. “Where is the danger?” The scales along his shoulders rippled.
Jenna gaped. She shut her mouth, ending her little whimpers. Her fear and panic flowed away, replaced by anger and outrage.
“Who the hell are you?” she demanded.
The Ennoi blinked. Now that he knew the room was empty, he kept his attention locked on Jenna. “Moonsong? Who are you talking to?”
Jenna’s head snapped back. “Kovos?”
“Yes? Did you have a nightmare?”
Jenna licked her lips. “I’m… I’m not… I think I’m dreaming right now.”
The Ennoi — Kovos, she reminded herself — strode around the be
d. Jenna raised her hand. “Please stop.”
He immediately paused, and his head tilted in puzzlement. “What is distressing you so, Jenna?”
Jenna waved to the bathroom. “Maybe… Maybe you should go take a look at yourself.”
Kovos looked down at his hands, and then froze. He spun around and strode to the bathroom. Jenna heard his startled exclamation. She closed her eyes and leaned her head against the wall. She took a deep, steadying breath, and then walked slowly to the bathroom.
Kovos studied himself in the mirror, touching his face, and running a hand over his arms and shoulders. Jenna took in his changes. Like other Avowed Ennoi, two horns curved gracefully from his brows to above his head, while shorter ones studded his jaw. Little ridges ran along his broad shoulders and down his spine. The muted swirls of color on his skin now burned with vibrancy. Larger, thicker scales sprouted from his body. They rippled and moved.
With a grunt, Kovos sat back. He shuddered, burying his face in his hands.
At the door, Jenna hesitated. He’s still the same man. It’s still Kovos. She walked toward him, and with a shaking hand, she squeezed his shoulder.
“Are… are you okay?”
Kovos’s hands muffled his voice. “Do you understand what has happened?”
Jenna nodded. “I… I think so.” She searched for something else to say. “I’m… I’m sorry.”
Kovos dropped his hands, and gaped at her in astonishment. With his mouth was slightly open, Jenna could see the tips of elongated fangs inside. She’d been kissing that mouth last night. He’d kissed her all over with it. Now they were razor sharp and made his jaw wider.
Less… Kovos. She tried to hide her wince. He’s still Kovos.
“You are… sorry?” Kovos asked.
Jenna wrapped the sheet around herself tighter. “I am. I’m sorry that you’re so upset.”
Kovos stood in one fluid motion.
“Jenna, you do not understand. I am not distraught.” He stepped forward and pulled her into his arms. He had grown taller by at least a foot, making her feel even smaller. Beneath her ear, she could hear his heart thundering, even louder than usual.
She ran her hand over his chest, where the scales lay flat, unlike the ones higher up on his shoulders which stirred as if touched by a breeze. They added color to his skin, swirled with orange and red, with vivid blue stripes, and where the light hit them, they reflected gold.
“You’re not upset?”
Kovos laughed, a rumble that echoed through his chest. He brushed a hand along her hair, and his new claws caught the tangles in her curls. He paused to gently remove them, before placing his hands on the side of her face. He raised her chin until their eyes met.
“I am not upset. I am thrilled. Do you know what this means?”
“You’re now an official king, like your father?”
He laughed again, throwing his head back, showing Jenna his fangs. He leaned down and pecked her lips. “My moonsong, this means you are my Avowed. That we are meant to be together. I have attained my Virtue of the Avowed. I am no longer Latent.”
What?
Kovos must’ve read something in her expression, because his grin faded. “You are the upset one.”
“No!” Jenna’s response came a little too quickly. Was she upset? “No,” she said again, slower. “I’m not… upset… exactly.” She searched for the words.
His eyes are the same. The thought gave her comfort.
“It’s just… a change.” She placed her hand on his cheek. His face was broader now, and the angles of his jaw sharper. “It’ll take some getting used to.” Her smile was wry. “I kinda liked your old face.”
Kovos nodded. “We will take it slowly. We have a lifetime to get used to each other’s faces.”
She ran a finger up the ridges on Kovos’s face. He closed his eyes and shuddered. Jenna snatched her hand back. “Sorry, was that too much?”
“My body feels different. Sensations are different now.” He took her hand and placed it on her chest. “Do you feel that? My second heart is beating.” He moved the hand to his lips. “It beats for you. I love you, Jenna Harlock.”
Jenna threw her arms around Kovos’s neck. Maybe Kovos’s heart wasn’t the only one that sounded like it might burst. “I love you, too.”
Kovos growled into her ear. “Say it again, but this time, include my name.”
Jenna laughed. “I love you, Kovos. I love you, Kovos!”
“Every Ennoi waits their entire life to hear their Avowed to say such words to them. I never realized how long I waited to hear you say them, Jenna.”
“I never realized I wanted to say them to you so badly.”
Kovos scooped her into his arms. “Now, let us go explore my improved sensations, shall we?”
With a whoop, he carried Jenna into the bedroom, and as the morning sun filled the chamber, Jenna and Kovos explored each other all over again.
Twice.
***
A few hours later, Jenna lay in Kovos’s arms again. Once sleep had claimed him, his scales had softened. They no longer danced, and lay flush to his skin.
She still felt a jolt every time she looked at his face. He wasn’t ugly. No, nor frightening. But she’d gotten used to him appearing a certain way, and now he looked different. She had carried the memory of his old face through her childhood, adolescence and beyond, like a safety blanket she didn’t have the heart to leave behind.
Now she had to find the beauty in his new appearance. It wasn’t hard, she had to admit. His scales swirled across his body, transforming his skin into something lively and colorful. She traced the patterns with her fingers. She’d seen the same colors on his mother, and on a few other Ennoi Cadam, but on Kovos, they seemed to burn from within.
Maybe I’m just seeing him through rose-colored love goggles.
The horns and ridges framed his face. While he’d nicked her a few times with his fangs during their ardor, he’d gotten better at knowing where they were. The second time around, he’d barely scraped her. She blushed. Except when he did it intentionally.
No, she wasn’t afraid of his appearance. She just mourned losing that boy that’d she’d loved for so long.
And now you’re loving a fine man.
And he loves you.
He loves you!
Jenna bit down on her lip to avoid giggling out aloud. She wanted to scramble to her feet and jump on the bed, like a giddy child. The way she and Mel would when some cute boy in high school asked Mel out. Even hormone-addled boys could tell Jenna wasn’t girlfriend material, but Mel had always been popular with the boys.
Oh, Mel. I wish you were here to see me!
Her joy faded. Guilt gnawed at Jenna’s stomach. She’d been so wrapped up in her own happiness that she had almost forgotten about her sister.
Where was Mel? What was she doing? Where they hurting her? When would they — whoever they were — get in touch? She’d done what they’d asked. She’d gotten closer to Kovos, and he trusted her completely. What would they ask her to do next? Interfere in council politics? Was she even smart enough to play the political game?
If I fail, what happens to Mel?
Tears prickled at Jenna’s eyes. She sniffed, but the tears wouldn’t stop. Her breathing caught and she sobbed. She wrapped her arms around Kovos, and buried her face in the sheets.
Kovos’s arms tightened around her. “Moonsong? What is wrong?”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to bother you. Did I wake you?”
“It is no bother. I am your Avowed, and you are mine. You worries are mine. You grief is mine.” He stroked her back. “Is there a concern weighing on your mind?”
Jenna hesitated. “I… I just miss home. I miss my sister.”
Kovos made a soothing sound, and pressed his face to her hair. “When the festival is over, perhaps we can arrange a visit.”
“That would be nice,” she said, snuggling
into Kovos. “Can it be done? I mean, I know Earth is off-limits.”
“It will annoy the Council, so I look forward to planning such a venture.” Jenna could hear the smile in his voice.
Jenna winced. Something else she hadn’t thought about. “How will the Council react to… to this?” She gestured at Kovos’s body.
“Well, I believe it is your role to react to this.” He took her hand and placed it low on his body.
Jenna flushed. “Be serious for a minute, please!”
Kovos sighed. “Yes, moonsong. Your minute starts now. Ask.”
She sat up on her elbows. “Are the Council going to give you grief over us?”
Kovos shrugged. “Probably. They cannot deny our Avowal. It is one aspect of Ennoi life that has never been negotiable.”
“But with a human?” Jenna pressed on. “They can’t accept a bond with a human. Even before you… changed. You’ve said that’s one of the reasons the Council is pissed at you.”
“That is an interesting turn of phrase.” Kovos pondered a moment. “I suspect from context it means annoyed, as if one were urinated upon by another. Pissed.”
Jenna laughed. “Yeah, pretty much.”
“I shall add it directly to my vocabulary. The illogical mute buttocks would possibly react as if urinated upon. But that is not my concern.” He kissed her forehead. “My concern is you.”
“And your people,” she reminded him.
“Them as well. But right now, you are my main concern.” He grinned at her. “And you should be concerned, because your minute is up.”
He launched himself at her, and Jenna fell back with a shriek of pure joy. The kisses he showered upon her face were met with many more of her own. In the fortress of Kovos’s arms, Jenna could hold off the world, and all the troubles it contained, for just a little bit longer.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
KOVOS
When Kovos emerged from his chambers, Yaldir waited by the door. Kovos grinned at his friend’s expression as Yaldir took in his new transformation.