by SJ McCoy
She let out a short laugh. “I wouldn’t struggle so much if you made any sort of contribution.”
He hung his head. “I know, and I’m sorry. Like I said, I want to make it up to you.”
“Then start paying child support. But don’t think that we’re going to get back together. We’re not. If you want a relationship with Owen, we can try to make that happen. But honestly, I’m not sure that it’s a good idea. You don’t know the first thing about him—or you don’t care. You should’ve known that a toy like that would set him off.”
He shrugged. “I thought he’d be better now he’s a bit older.”
She laughed again. “Is that why you’re back? You thought maybe he’d grow out of it and things would be easier now? Because believe me, they’re not.”
He shrugged again. “Yeah. I suppose I thought he would have grown out of it a bit. At least now you can talk to him, tell him off when he acts up like that. He needs to learn.”
Tara closed her eyes. “This isn’t a good idea, Mark. I think you should go.”
“Don’t do that, Tara. I’m just being honest. I can learn. I’m his dad. I’ll get the hang of it.”
She nodded sadly. She wasn’t sure he would, but those three little words—I’m his dad—triggered something inside her. She knew what it was. She and Nicole had grown up not knowing their dad. Their mom had refused to talk about him, right up until the day she died.
“I think you should go. We’ll try this again. Maybe you can come one night next week after work.”
“But I’m off all weekend. I thought the three of us could hang out.”
“No. He’s tired, and he’s upset. We got off to a bad start. How about Wednesday?”
He pursed his lips. He was going to argue. She knew it. “Look. I mean it. I’m not interested in us getting back together. I’m not going to change my mind about that. So, maybe it’s best if you take a few days and think about whether you really want to be part of Owen’s life. Because if we do this, that’s all it’s going to be. I don’t want to put Owen—or us—through all the upheaval if that’s not what you want.”
He smiled and came toward her. “But babes—”
“Don’t call me that!”
“Let me guess? There’s someone else, isn’t there? I’m not stupid. I know you didn’t buy those yourself.” He pointed accusingly at Reid’s roses standing in the vase in pride of place on the dining table.
She shrugged. “That’s none of your business. It’s not about whether I’m seeing someone. It’s about the way you walked out on us and the way I had to build a life for Owen and me. I don’t want you back.”
He made his way to the door and stopped when he got there. “I’ll call you about Wednesday. You can’t keep Owen away from me.” He slammed the door on the way out.
Tara blew out a big sigh and Owen came out of his room with big frightened eyes. “It’s okay. He’s gone.”
Owen nodded and went and sat on the sofa. “Don’t like him.”
~ ~ ~
Reid sat at his desk and stared out at the ocean. It calmed him. Something about the incessant motion helped his mind to be still. He knew that Mark was going to see Tara and Owen tonight, and it had him unsettled. She’d reassured him that she wasn’t interested in the guy—and he believed her. That wasn’t his biggest concern. He was worried about Owen. He was doing okay. They’d talked on the phone every night, and Owen had told him each time how many days were left until he returned. It was difficult, though. In the few days he’d been with them, Owen had been happy with the new routine. When he’d left, he’d disturbed that routine, and now Mark was another upheaval. It wasn’t good all coming together like this.
He tried to focus on the ocean—on the movement—but his mind didn’t want to be still. He wanted to pack a bag and go back to LA, even though that would make matters worse at this point. He’d told Owen ten days, and if he showed up again before that, Owen would be pleased to see him, but still thrown off by the unpredictability that was being introduced into his life. Reid remembered all too well how hard it had been when he was a kid. He’d needed everything to be predictable. Changes in his routine were unbearable. He’d come a long way since then. He found ways to cope—and ways to make sure that he could keep core parts of his life running to a predictable, comfortable schedule.
He picked up his phone. He wanted to talk to his mom. She was the one who’d figured out how to make his life bearable. And he was hoping that she might have spoken to Tara—or that she would soon.
“Hello, poppet,” she answered.
It made him smile that she still called him that, though he knew his brothers struggled with it more than he did. “Hi, Mom. How are you both?”
“We’re doing well. We just made the trek to Montana. We’re going to be here for the next few months.”
“You’re there early this year.”
“Yes. I was missing the mountains. And your dad has such a great staff at the clinic now that it was easier to persuade him to come away.”
Reid laughed. “He’ll still go back a couple of days a week.”
“He will; he’s going on Tuesday. And while he does, I’m going to LA for a little shopping.”
“You mean you’re going to check how Oscar and TJ are doing?”
“Well, I might have dinner with them. And I was thinking I might call Tara and see if she’d like to have lunch with me. What do you think?”
“She might. Don’t ask her to go to any of your usual places though. She won’t feel comfortable to bring Owen, so she’ll say no.”
His mom laughed. “Remember who you’re talking to? I was thinking I’d suggest Spider’s coffee house. He said the three of you have been there.”
“You talked to Spider?”
“Yes. He’s a very sweet young man. I do like him. He’s been a good friend to Grace.”
“He has. But how …? Never mind.” Reid wasn’t sure he wanted to know. His mom befriended all kinds of people. He should hardly be surprised that she was buddies with Spider. “That’s probably a good idea, and if she says no, just suggest you can go and see her?”
“She wouldn’t think I’m being too pushy?”
“She might, but I doubt it. She knows that you understand how hard it can be to go anywhere.”
“I do. I’m looking forward to meeting her. Do you think you might bring her up here?”
“I’d like to. I know she’d love for Owen to see the park.”
“I’m sure it’d do them both good, and maybe, once she gets to know me—and of course, once Owen does—she might let me watch him so the two of you can go out for dinner.”
Reid smiled. “Thanks, Mom.”
“You’re most welcome, dear. You know I’d love it if you came to live here.”
“Live there?!”
“Yes. If she really is your person, and I believe she is, then the two of you are no doubt going to move in together. I know you wouldn’t be able to live in LA, and I doubt it’s the best place for Owen to be. It’d do him good to be here, just like it did you.”
Reid nodded. He didn’t know what to say. He’d been thinking about Tara in terms of forever, but he hadn’t dared assess the possibilities of what forever might look like.
His mom laughed. “Your dad would tell me I’m getting carried away, but time isn’t much of a factor. When you know, you know, and you might as well get on with living your happily ever after.”
“I’d love to see his face if he heard you say that.”
She laughed again. “And I’d love you to see his face if you asked him about our whirlwind romance.”
Reid cocked his head to one side. It surprised him to realize that he didn’t know how his parents had met or what their relationship had been like—or how long it had lasted—before they got married. “I might oblige you there and ask him next time I see him.”
“Ooh, I hope you do. That’ll be fun. Anyway. I sho
uld go. I’ll give Tara a call now, and I’ll let you know what we arrange.”
“Thanks, Mom”
Reid straightened the collar of his polo shirt as he hung up. He should perhaps have told her that now was a bad time. Perhaps. But he didn’t dislike the thought of Tara taking her call while Mark was there.
Chapter Thirteen
Tara was nervous as she pushed open the door to the coffee shop. It was kind of Reid’s mom to offer to meet with her. It would be good to talk to someone who knew what it was like to raise a child who was different. But still. It was weird because the child she’d raised was Reid. Tara had no doubt that she’d be curious about her. She hoped she’d be as nice as she sounded on the phone. She took a deep breath as she looked around—she was about to find out. Owen clung to her hand and looked around, too. He seemed less nervous than she was. He liked the idea of meeting Reid’s mom. It seemed he liked the idea of anything to do with Reid.
A woman in her fifties got to her feet and waved. “Tara?”
Tara smiled and made her way over to her table. “Hi. Yes, I’m Tara, and this is Owen.”
“It’s lovely to meet you both. I’m Jean.” She wrapped Tara in a hug that made her want to hug back and stay there a while.
Jean let go and bent down to Owen’s eye-level. “Hello, Owen.”
“Hello.” To Tara’s relief, he smiled.
Jean slid into the booth. “Where would you like to sit, Owen?”
He slid onto the bench next to her. Tara sat down opposite them. She was a little surprised—but pleasantly so—that Owen had chosen to sit next to Jean.
Spider came out and smiled around at them. “What can I get you?”
Once they’d ordered, Jean smiled at Owen, and he smiled back. “Are you Reid’s mommy?”
“Yes, I am.”
“Reid loves Owen.”
Tara was just glad that he hadn’t said Reid loved Mommy.
Jean smiled. “I know he does. He told me.”
Tara didn’t know what to say. She didn’t know what Reid had told his mom about the two of them, but by the looks of it, he’d told her quite a bit.
Jean smiled at her. “I’m not a nosy old bat, I promise.”
Tara laughed. It was such an unexpected thing for her to say. “I didn’t think you were.”
“Good. It can’t be easy for you meeting your boyfriend’s mom when he’s not even here.”
Tara shrugged. She hadn’t been thinking of this as meeting her boyfriend’s mom so much as meeting someone who’d raised a child like Owen. “I’m glad you wanted to.”
“I did—and not to interrogate you about you and Reid. He told me that he thought I might be able to help.”
“That’s what he told me, too. Though I don’t even know what to ask. Owen and I live a quiet little life. We have it figured out.”
Jean nodded. “Figured out in that you don’t go anywhere unfamiliar or do anything that he isn’t used to?”
“Yeah.”
Jean sighed. “That’s how my husband wanted to do things with Reid, too. On the surface, it makes sense. You keep a small controlled environment, and you can manage how it affects him.” She smiled at Owen who was watching her. “It works for the short term, but it only creates problems in the long term. You can’t shield him all his life. And believe me, I know you want to.”
Tara nodded.
“With Reid, we homeschooled him and his brothers, but then we had them join in with extra-curricular activities. It worked well.”
“I can see that it would up there in Montana, but I’m not so sure about doing that here. I plan to homeschool him, but I don’t know about taking him to after-school clubs.”
“Yes. It would be different here. Have you considered moving away from the city?"
“I’d love to, but it hasn’t been an option.”
Jean smiled kindly. “You never know, that might change.”
Tara smiled. Was Jean imagining her moving away to be with Reid? She couldn’t say she hadn’t thought about it—as a distant possibility.
“Take for example, where we are in Montana—where Reid grew up. It’s a very different life. The schools are smaller. The whole community knows each other.” Jean smiled. “I think that—or somewhere like it—would be good for Owen, and for you.”
“I imagine it would.”
Spider returned with their drinks and sandwiches and set them down. “How are we, ladies?”
“Great, thanks,” said Tara.
Owen smiled at him. He was in good spirits today. “I’m not a lady.”
Spider laughed. “I know. You’re my little buddy, right?”
Owen nodded. “And you’re not scary.”
Jean laughed at that. “I thought Spider might be scary when I first met him.” She spoke to Owen but winked at Spider.
Owen nodded at her. “He’s big and painted.”
Tara laughed. He was talking about the tattoos that covered Spider’s arms.
“He is. But he’s very nice and very kind, too.”
Owen nodded again. “Like Reid. Nice and kind.”
Tara’s heart melted. Reid was nice and kind. He was also strong and sexy and … she stopped herself. She shouldn’t be thinking about him like that in front of his mom.
Spider grinned at them. “When’s he coming back?”
Owen scowled. “Friday, three more days. Dad’s coming back tomorrow. One more day. Don’t like him.”
Tara’s heart started to race. She’d told Owen that Mark was coming to see him again on Wednesday and had used the same countdown tactic, hoping that, although that was something he wasn’t looking forward to, at least having the timeline set out for him would make it easier. Spider was giving her a questioning look, but Jean was smiling.
“Reid told me you saw your daddy.”
Owen didn’t look happy at all. “Don’t want to see him. Want to see Reid.”
Tara nodded at Jean, wishing she could explain. “Owen hasn’t seen his dad for a long time and now …”
Jean reached across and patted her hand. “I know. Reid told me all about it.”
Tara was relieved. She didn’t want Jean to think that she was seeing Mark while Reid was gone.
Spider frowned at her. “I thought he was out of the picture.”
“So did I, but he showed up again, and he wants to see Owen.”
“Owen doesn’t want to see him,” said Owen.
Sometimes she wondered if he followed the conversation around him. In this case, he was following it closely and making his opinion known.
“Do you want to come and choose a cookie for after your sandwich?” asked Spider.
Owen nodded eagerly and looked at Tara.
“Okay.” She knew Spider was trying to give her a few minutes alone with Jean. Though what she was going to say to her, she didn’t know.
Jean smiled as she watched Spider take Owen behind the counter and lift him up to look in the display case. “It must be hard,” she said. “It’s easy for me to spout advice, but I had Johnny to help me. You’ve done it all on your own.”
“I have, and I wish it could stay that way.” Tara regretted the words as soon as they came out. “I mean. I wish Mark had stayed gone. I don’t mean Reid. I wish …” She shut her mouth before she said too much.
Jean smiled. “It’s okay. I understand. I wish, too. That you and Reid …” She shrugged. “Since you’re not saying it, I won’t either. But I can hope. What are you going to do about Mark?”
Tara shrugged. “Honestly, I’m just hoping that he’ll change his mind again. He came back saying he wanted another shot with me. But I made it clear. Even if I hadn’t met Reid, there’s no way I’d ever get back together with Mark. But I can’t keep Owen away from him … can I?” She almost wished that Jean would say yes, she could, and that, in fact, she should. That would make things so much easier.
Jean sighed. “You’re too big
of a person to keep him away from his father. But you don’t think his father’s good for him, do you?”
“He isn’t. He doesn’t understand Owen, and he doesn’t want to. He thinks he just needs a firmer hand—that he can be taught to behave.”
Jean let out a short laugh. “He is behaving—in the only way he knows how.” She smiled. “If you were to move away, do you think Mark would make the effort to come and see you?”
Tara met her gaze and shook her head. “I doubt it very much.”
“Sometimes, with people like that, you need to put the onus on them. They want what they want—until they have to get off their ass to get it, then they don’t want it anymore. If you were happy here, then I wouldn’t suggest leaving to get away from him, but since you can see yourself being happier elsewhere, then it might just be time to go.”
Tara nodded. Was Jean really suggesting that she and Owen should leave the city to be with Reid and that that would solve her problem with Mark? It certainly sounded that way—and she loved the idea. But there was the small matter of what Reid might think about it.
~ ~ ~
On Tuesday evening, Reid paced the living room. Tara had gone for lunch with his mom this afternoon, and he was waiting to hear from her about how it had gone. He wanted to call Tara and ask her, but they spoke later in the evening—just before Owen’s bedtime.
He could call his mom, but that seemed irrational. She’d said she would call, and she would when the time was good for her. She could be doing any number of things, enjoying her time in the city. What bothered him the most was that this was so unlike him. He didn’t get impatient; he didn’t pace the floor waiting for news. He knew that everything happened in its own time and was content to wait. Usually.
He went to the bathroom and washed his hands, looking himself in the eye in the mirror as he did. He wanted to ask himself what was going on, but he knew the answer. He had to smile. It was Tara. She had him completely turned around. And for the first time in his life, getting the right answers was more important than getting an answer at the right time. He’d heard people talk about love—and thought it was a strange concept. He’d been able to rationalize it that people could somehow, instinctively recognize a compatible mate. He knew that both of his brothers were in love. Now that he’d witnessed it, he was less sure there was any rational explanation. At least not one that could be explained within the scope of current research on—what? Would the explanation be neurological, psychological, or physical? All of the above. He chuckled. What he did know was that both Oscar and TJ were in love. And if he wanted to draw comparisons or conclusions, he would go so far as to say that he, too, was in love.