Her cheeks colored and she ate a spoonful of soup. Kavan leaned forward, trying to capture her gaze but she refused to look at him
“If this is going to work, you have to trust me,” he said. “Or at least pretend that you trust me. If you don’t, then our story is going to get blown out of the water and nobody will believe anything you say ever again. I know how these things go.”
Was it too late for him to back out of this? It wasn’t like he was getting anything out of it. Valerie wanted to pretend to be engaged to save her own face and while it was a face worth saving, what was he getting from it? It wouldn’t help keep him out of jail. It wouldn’t help him get back into the Family…
Or would it? He straightened slightly, his eyes widening before he could stop himself. He was just glad Valerie wasn’t looking at him and hadn’t seen it.
This was perfect! If he could get something on Valerie, something that Lancaster could use against her, then he’d be welcomed back. And what better way to get close enough to find the dirt on her than to be her fiancé?
“Why should I trust you?” Valerie looked up again and for a moment, Kavan thought she had somehow read his mind and knew what he was thinking.
But no, he’d just told her to trust him. Ironic. “You can pretend.”
“And that’s going to help me how if it turns out that this ring is stolen?”
“I found it.” Tension crept into his voice, and he had to resist the urge to snarl. His wolf, which had been oddly quiet ever since he came into the office, snorted. He wasn’t sure what the sound was supposed to mean.
“Fifteen years ago, you said.”
“It was around fifteen years. I found it in a gutter. Figured some rich lady lost it without realizing it, or someone had a bad breakup. I didn’t really care; I was a kid.” Kavan snorted as he leaned back, echoing his wolf. It didn’t like that, though, and growled. It wasn’t often that his wolf growled at him but then the situation wasn’t an ordinary one, either. “If you don’t believe me, you can get it looked at. You can check and double check and get the police involved. Do a whole big investigation, see if I care.”
He did care, though, and he wasn’t sure why. There was no reason to care.
Valerie’s eyes flashed as she snatched the ring back. “Fine. I will. I’ll say that you found it fifteen years ago and want it returned to the rightful owner if we can track them down. And maybe I’ll buy my own damn diamond ring.”
“You’re welcome to go ahead. But you know that people aren’t going to like that!”
Valerie shoved the ring into her pocket and stood. “Thanks for lunch. But I have a lot of work to do and a new case to start thinking about and all sorts of things on my plate right now. Let’s just both agree not to talk to anybody about our engagement for a while and take the rest of the day to get our own shit done.”
“Fine.” Kavan stood and snatched the paper bag. “Enjoy your lunch.”
He stormed from the room, even as his wolf growled and paced. If she didn’t want to put any effort into this, then it wasn’t up to him to seduce her…
Only, if he was going to get close enough to dig up dirt and get back into the Family? Seduction was exactly what he was going to have to do. He needed her to trust him, needed her to let him into her life. A knot of guilt curled in his stomach as he thought about using her that way, but it was his only chance. If he didn’t have the Family, he had nothing. He was nothing.
He’d been nothing as a kid. He wasn’t going back to that. Not when he had this chance to be part of something again.
Chapter Six
It took him some time to figure out Valerie’s favorite foods. And then it quickly became apparent that she didn’t like to eat her favorites all that often. Which was smart; Kavan had to admit, eating the same thing over and over again would mean that it would quickly lose its appeal. Well, food at least. Now that he and Valerie were engaged, he found himself craving the taste of something that wasn’t food at all.
Valerie, however, didn’t want to have anything to do with him sexually, or so it seemed. And he didn’t push the issue. Pretending to be engaged was one thing but pretending to be engaged so that he could find something to use against her? That was something else, and he wasn’t comfortable with the idea of having sex with a woman only to turn around and betray her.
That being said… he wanted her. Bad. And he kept trying to think of ways to justify that to himself.
Shaking his head, Kavan walked out of the elevator and toward Valerie’s office. People who shared the building with her had come to recognize him, though they seemed to be just as suspicious now as they had been when he first started coming. He ignored the looks he got, though.
Camille was at her desk when he entered, and he gave her a winning smile. “Good morning. Is the boss in?”
Camille gave him a wide smile back. It had been ridiculously easy to win her over. All he had to do was talk about how awesome he thought Valerie was and Camille was putty in his hands. She had an easy-going personality and was able to very easily catch you up in conversation when she wanted to buy a little extra time for Valerie.
“She’s expecting you,” Camille said, nodding at the brown bag in his hand. “Although, you should probably buy an insulated lunch bag or something. So you can reuse it.”
“This is fully recycled material,” Kavan protested, feigning disappointment.
“Whatever you feel is best for the environment.” Camille smiled and waved him on. “Go on, she skipped breakfast and is getting hangry.”
“I know.”
Kavan strutted into Valerie’s office. She was pouring over a huge, thick book and barely glanced up at him. “Thanks for lunch.”
Kavan wondered how she would react if he shut the door, swept everything off her desk and laid her down on it. He could just imagine it; her naked under her judge’s robes, the billowing black fabric all about her. Her ankles locked around his hips, his hands on her meaty thighs as he thrust into her again and again, sucking on one of her glorious breasts.
He set the bag on the desk, fighting down the tightness that swelled in him. He wasn’t going to use her sexually along with everything else. When he turned to leave, though, she called out, “Wait.”
He turned back, question in his raised brow.
“Shut the door.” Valerie stared hard at him.
He did so and grinned, images returning to his mind. “Is there a reason why you wanted a little privacy, your Honor?”
Valerie rolled her eyes at him, though a slight flush entered her cheeks. “Don’t be so horny.”
“Who said I was horny?”
Valerie opened her mouth and shut it, clearly at a loss for words. Then she smirked, pointed just below his waist and laughed. Kavan looked down to see his erection bulging in his jeans. Ah. Maybe he shouldn’t have worn something quite so form-fitting today. He moved the bagged lunch, hiding himself from her view even though he knew it would do little to stop that triumphant smirk on her face.
“It’s flattering,” she cooed as she leaned forward. “That even after we’ve been engaged for a full week you still want me as much as you did before.”
“More,” Kavan admitted.
He wasn’t ashamed, either. Not of his desire. She was beautiful. Curves from head to toe, and his one taste of making love with her had been like a drowning man tasting water. No, wait. That was wrong. A man in the desert tasting water. Drowning man tasting… air? Whatever. It had been huge. Especially since it had been so long since he’d last been with a woman. A frown crossed his face and he let out a curse.
“That’s flattering,” Valerie said with a frown. “Is being attracted to me worth a ‘goddamn it all to hell’?”
“No. It’s just… I just realized. We’re pretending to be engaged, right? So, for all outside purposes, we are engaged.”
“Yes… that is what’s happening.”
Kavan sat down. “Which means that I can’t go out and pick up women. I�
��m not going to have people thinking I’m a cheater.”
Valerie looked startled for a moment. Her mouth opened, then she appeared to think better of it and closed it again. She shrugged, not looking at him and reached for her lunch. “Well, I’m not sleeping with you, if that’s what you’re getting at.”
But when he sniffed, he could smell arousal in the air. His wolf growled in want, and he barely suppressed a moan. His jeans were feeling far too tight, and he rested his hands on his thighs. “Why not? We are engaged, so why not have a little bit of fun? We’ve already slept together; we can take precautions to make sure you don’t get pregnant. And I want you on this desk.”
Valerie’s face went beet red. She pulled away from her lunch, her gaze sweeping over the desk. “Not at work! Tell you what, you move in with me and I’ll consider it.”
It was Kavan’s turn to pull back. “Move in with you?”
“Yes.”
“Why?” Could this be a trick somehow?
“It’s the best way to keep our cover intact. People think it’s weird that we’re not living together. I could say that we’re saving ourselves for marriage, but I’m pretty sure that my neighbors have already told the media that they saw you leaving my house that morning.” Valerie scowled. “I wouldn’t put it past them to start publishing something like that if I did say we’re waiting.”
So, it was still all about her and saving face. Kavan frowned. That wasn’t unexpected, of course, and it was ridiculous for it to hurt at all. So he refused to let it hurt… or at least, he tried to. There was a slight sting anyway, even as he scoffed at himself for letting it sting.
“You know,” he said, keeping his voice even because if he kept accepting everything she said or did without complaint, it would look suspicious. “You haven’t told me what I’m getting out of this whole arrangement. It’s all about you. Saving your career. Making you look better. Stopping people from insulting you. Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy to help out. But you can’t just make the decisions and expect me to follow along with everything.”
Valerie stiffened. “You agreed to this.”
“I can change my mind, can’t I?”
Panic flashed in Valerie’s eyes. She sat there, rigid and staring at him while clearly fighting her fears. Then, slowly, that fear morphed. She pressed her hands to her desk and glowered at him with such hate that Kavan reeled back unintentionally. What had he done now to earn such a look?
“So, what you’re saying is that you’re going to pull out of this if I don’t sleep with you again?”
Kavan’s wolf barked sharply, insulted at the accusation. Kavan narrowed his own eyes. So that was why she was looking at him like that. “No,” he snapped. “That isn’t what I’m saying at all and quite frankly, if that’s what you think of me then this charade is done.”
Surprise crossed Valerie’s face.
“I don’t blackmail people into sleeping with me,” Kavan continued, his hands clenching as he leaned forward. He wasn’t going to let her think that. It didn’t matter if this was all a ploy, there were some things that he insisted on, even in a fake mate. “I’m not a rapist, and if you think I am then I’m out that door.”
He stood and Valerie jumped to her feet. “Wait!”
“Why should I?”
“I’m sorry,” Valerie blurted. “But you have to admit, it’s a reasonable fear. You’ve been talking about how you want to have a little fun and then imply you’re leaving because I’m not giving you anything for this? Plus, you are a criminal. You’ve dealt in drugs and killed people and—”
“I was never part of the drugs,” Kavan snapped back. “And the only people I killed were trying to kill other people.”
“You said that you might have killed a woman for the mere fact she saw something she shouldn’t have.”
That pulled Kavan up short. He wanted to protest, wanted to tell her it wasn’t fair for her to throw that confession back at him when he had trusted her with it. But he didn’t say anything. Really, did he owe her an explanation? She was the one who came up with this crazy scheme.
After a moment, Valerie sighed. “Look, I know that you’re struggling with finding something to do in society now. What if I funded your education? You could go to any college or university you wanted; I’d pay your way. Even after we break up.”
“University? I haven’t even finished high school.”
“So, what’s stopping you from finishing it now?”
Kavan opened and closed his mouth. “I… don’t have time.”
“So, you can cut your hours to part-time once you move in with me,” Valerie continued. “And you don’t have to pay any rent. That should help, shouldn’t it? Plus, my place is closer to the store than where you’re living, so you’ll save commute time.” She seemed to have calmed down considerably. “And isn’t that something you have from this arrangement, now? Rent free, shorter commute, free food. Think of what else you can do with me as your sugar mama.”
Kavan rolled his eyes but had to let a grin spread over his face. “My sugar mama, huh?”
“Yep.”
“You do know what that term means, right?”
Valerie paused. A look of confusion crossed her face.
Kavan had to laugh. “Never mind. Sure, you can be my sugar mama.”
“Good.” Valerie held out a key toward him and he took it, letting his hand linger on hers. Her pupils dilated, and Kavan grinned.
He leaned forward, kissing her on the lips. Valerie started to pull back, then threw herself forward. One hand still clasped around the key, she tangled the other into his hair. His wolf howled in triumph and Kavan pulled her closer, his arm tight around her waist. He thrust forward, grinding hard against her. His pants were so tight, he wanted to just rip them off. As he turned her, though, to press her into the desk and started to inch her robes up, she pressed a hand flat against his chest and pulled away.
“No.”
Kavan growled in frustration. Need pounded through his blood, and his lust throbbed deep inside of him. Why was she bringing him so close only to tell him to stop now?
Valerie gave him another push. “No.”
“Alright, alright,” he grumbled, releasing her. “Why’d you even kiss me, though? Thought you didn’t want any of that.”
Her cheeks flushed, and her scent infused the air pleasantly. She didn’t answer him, just pressed the key into his hand. “You can go ahead and start moving your stuff in whenever you want.”
“Valerie—”
“I’m very busy. And don’t you have to get to work here soon, too?”
He narrowed his eyes at her but accepted the key and left without another word. What was with her? Was she trying to pull him deeper into this farce or had she just lost control for a moment? Was it a trick? Or did she suspect his plan to dig up dirt on her…
Right. Dirt. He flinched but grasped the key tighter. This was a great opportunity. Moving in with her meant he was going to find something for sure.
And then he’d be part of the Family again.
***
Valerie finished locking up her cabinets and rolled her shoulders. After her fight with Bloom and then with Kavan, she was surprised she had been able to get any work done at all, but she had managed to accomplish quite a bit at that. She had missed Camille’s cheery presence, but when she called her PA around three, she found Camille was doing much better and was glad she’d sent her home.
Her gaze was drawn outside, to the darkness that had descended over New York City. This part of the city never got truly dark but there was a threatening oppression to the lack of sunlight out there. It was well and truly night out there and in a city with so much crime, it was frightening as well. Luckily, the parking garage was well-lit and protected against random people coming in.
Valerie sat back at her desk, still warm from where she had been sitting all day. She knew that she was just delaying at this point. Her limbs sagged with exhaustion and she wanted to just
go home and collapse into her bed. The only problem was, she didn’t know if Kavan would be there.
If she knew he was, it wouldn’t be so bad. She’d be able to prepare herself for the rush of desire that came over her when she saw him, she’d be able to practice what she was going to say so she could just go to bed.
If she knew he wasn’t there, she could prepare herself for the disappointment she already knew she was going to feel. Then she could microwave herself something to eat and go to bed, filling her mind with other things so she didn’t wish he was with her.
The problem was, she couldn’t prepare for both. She was just too tired.
Snorting at herself, Valerie grabbed her purse and rooted through it, making sure she had everything still. Why should she be so nervous about it either way? It wasn’t as though it would make any real difference. It was so late; he wasn’t going to try to kiss her again.
But there are still things to say, aren’t there? It had been bugging her all day that he thought she thought he would blackmail her into having sex with him. Sure, she had had that thought, but it was gone quickly. Honestly, if their places were reversed, he’d have thought the same thing, right? The whole situation was so confusing!
But he also couldn’t think that was what she really thought of him… She gave him a key to her place, after all. That in itself showed that she trusted him not to murder or hurt her in any way. And she wanted to point that out, to show that even though she had said what she did, her actions proved that it wasn’t what she really thought.
Or would it be better to just pretend they hadn’t had their fight earlier? Would it be better just to go forward thinking that was already behind them?
Valerie finished locking up and headed for the elevator. Part of her wondered if she could get away with napping in the office, but she wasn’t ready to be that much of a workaholic yet. As she headed for the parking garage, her phone started to buzz. She answered it, though her shoulders tensed as soon as she saw that it was an unlisted number. Biting back a sigh, she answered, all the while praying that it wasn’t Bloom.
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