by Jess Bryant
“Yeah? Well you’re not Derek are you?”
“No shit.” He muttered quietly before he growled, “Jesus, Lu, how drunk are you? You just walked right past your door.”
She stopped, looked around, and turned back to scowl at him. He was right of course. He was standing in front of her door four steps behind her. Dammit, all of these pathways and bungalows looked the same. But she knew it wasn’t just the alcohol that was distracting her.
It was him. Him and his stupid, judgmental bullshit. He drove her crazy.
“How do you know which room is mine?” She narrowed her eyes as she marched back towards him.
“Because mine is right next door.”
“But how do you know this one is mine?”
“Best man. I know everyone’s room number.”
“I’m the best man.”
“No, you’re not.” He frowned.
“Yes, I am.”
“No.”
“Yes, I…”
“You’re not the best man, Lu! You’re not a man. You’re a woman. Maybe Derek is too fucking stupid to realize that but I’m not so stop arguing with me over dumb shit and unlock your door so I can make sure you get your drunk ass into bed before you push me too far and I do something we’ll both regret.”
Her soggy mind whirled when he all but yelled at her but she pulled out the key card and swiped it over the reader. The lock unclicked and Connor pushed it open, holding it for her and then following her inside. She didn’t even think to tell him to get out as she unsnapped her necklace and put her jewelry on top of the dresser.
He’d said something that sank in, past all of the booze, down to the loneliest parts of her.
“I’m not the best man.” She admitted in a small voice. “I’m not the best anything.”
Connor’s sigh was heavy in the quiet room, “That’s not true.”
“Isn’t it though?” She glanced up to find him standing beside the bed, hands on his hips, a look she couldn’t read on his face. “I’m not the girl that ever gets picked first. I’m nothing but an afterthought.”
“Lu...” He swiped a hand over his face, “Get in bed. Please. You’re drunk and you’re not making any sense.”
“I make perfect sense and you know it.” She unzipped the side of her sundress and shrugged out of it. “You just hate admitting when I’m right.”
Connor sucked in audible air when her dress his the ground, “Why the hell are you taking your clothes off in front of me?”
“I’m going to bed. I’m not sleeping in my dress.” She glanced down at her bra and panties and shrugged indifferently. “This covers as much as a swimsuit. Don’t have a coronary Connor. I’m not trying to seduce you if that’s what you’re worried about.”
He growled something she couldn’t understand beneath his breath as she stepped past him and crawled beneath the covers, pulling them up to her chin. He hadn’t moved. He was still standing exactly where he’d been before when she looked back at him. Only his eyes were closed and his chest was moving up and down in deep breaths.
It was like he couldn’t even stand the sight of her. She was that awful. She curled in on herself, hating the doubts that were swirling in her head, hating herself.
“Connor?”
“Yeah?” His voice was tense and he answered before his eyes flicked open and found hers.
“Why doesn’t anyone want me?”
“Lu…” He groaned, “Don’t. Just go to sleep.”
“I heard them talking about the bet, about the other bridesmaids. I’m not even part of it. It’s like I’m invisible. It’s like I don’t even exist. I thought, all this time I thought Derek couldn’t see me but he does. He just doesn’t want what he sees. Nobody does.”
Connor stared at her for a long moment, his brows furrowed. His mouth opened and then closed as if he wanted to say something but stopped himself. When his face went soft, she recognized the look there and turned her head away before the rush of tears could come again.
Pity. Again. And from Connor.
She bit her lip to stifle the rush of sadness that was overtaking her pleasurable buzz. Why was she talking to Connor anyway? He wasn’t her friend. He was just the asshole that liked to remind her that Derek would never love her the way she loved him. He was the last person she should be hoping would reassure her.
“Forget it. Just go away.” She muttered into her pillow.
“Lu…” He said again in that soft tone of voice, as if she might shatter if he spoke too loudly, and honestly she wasn’t sure if he stayed a moment longer that she wouldn’t so she hissed at him instead.
“I said, go. Get out. Now. I appreciate you making sure I got back but I don’t want you here. Get out of my room. I’m being drunk and stupid, just like you said. I just want to go to sleep and forget all of this.”
Since she refused to look at him, she held her breath and waited. There was no other sound in the room. Nothing. Not even the sound of his breathing. A long moment passed and then another and she was just working up the courage to roll back over and yell at him when she heard him sigh and then the rustle of his clothes as he moved.
“Fine. I’m going.” His voice was hard, rough, and he cleared his throat, “I’ll put a bottle of water from the mini-fridge on the nightstand. You should drink it before you pass out. It’ll help with the hangover.”
Her bottom lip trembled and she bit into it harder. The tears were coming and she wanted to curse at him. She wanted to fight with him some more. She’d rather fight with him than deal with him like this. She couldn’t fucking stand it when he was nice to her. She didn’t want his pity.
She listened with her eyes squeezed shut as the fridge clicked open and then shut. She heard him move back towards the bed and put the bottle beside her. But she still jumped a little when she felt his fingers stroke softly over her hair, briefly, so briefly she thought maybe she’d made it up in her drunk mind, because a second later his voice came from the doorway.
“Goodnight Lu.”
The door clicked shut behind him before she could respond, though she had no idea what she would have said. Thank you. Goodnight. Go the hell away. Please don’t leave me alone. It didn’t matter. He was gone and she was all alone again.
She was drunk and emotional. Connor had done a nice thing for her by getting her to bed. But that didn’t make them friends and she needed to remember that.
Chapter Four
Connor raised his hand and said a silent prayer that he wasn’t making a huge mistake before he knocked. The sound reverberated in the quiet morning. He’d waited for as long as he could. He’d waited and listened and watched but when she hadn’t emerged from her room he’d known that the hangover from last night must be hell and went to retrieve the gifts that would hopefully get him back through her door.
Memories of last night assaulted him every time he blinked. Images of Lulu smiling and laughing. The way she’d looked at him when she’d asked why nobody wanted her. The way she’d looked standing there in nothing but a lacy bra and panties set, completely oblivious to the fact that he wanted her more than he wanted air or sunlight or tomorrow.
She was as oblivious to him as Derek was to her.
It was a sick joke of fate. It had to be. What other explanation was there for why he wanted this particular woman? The one that had never wanted him? The one that longed for his best friend, their best friend, the same way that he longed for her? Fucking fate.
He raised his hand and knocked again, harder this time. Some of his frustrations worked their way into his fist. He thought he heard movement on the other side of the door after a few louder bangs but he couldn’t be sure. He hit the door one more time and was just opening his mouth to yell when it jerked open to reveal the woman of his dreams looking like absolute hell on the other side.
He fought not to laugh, knowing she would slam the door in his face if he did. Her long, dark hair was in tangles, hanging every which way and crumpled on one side. Her pretty angular fa
ce was crossed with pillow lines. She’d gone to sleep without taking off her makeup and there were dark splotches down her cheeks. Those black streaks cut his urge to laugh off instantly.
She’d cried. After he’d left her in bed alone last night, she’d cried. Those were mascara tears that had dried on her cheeks.
His heart ached and he wanted to reach for her. He wished he could go back in time and refuse to leave her alone. He wanted to go back and tell her the truth, that she was wanted, that he wanted her. But telling her that the reason the other guys hadn’t included her in their bet was because he’d overheard them before she came outdoors and threatened each and every Harper male that if they laid a finger on her that he’d rip it off, seemed like a bad idea.
She didn’t seem to be in any way prepared to learn that he had staked his claim with the other groomsmen. She wasn’t ready to know that if she was finally ready to get over Derek and move on, it was damn sure going to be with him. He couldn’t tell her that he wouldn’t let any of those dumbass, Derek look-alikes that his friend called family anywhere near her.
She was his. She just didn’t know it yet. But she would find out soon enough.
“What?” She snapped and he grinned because he knew he’d been staring.
“Morning Medusa.”
Her eyes narrowed, “Fuck off, Shaw.”
She started to shut the door in his face but he’d expected as much and caught it with his foot, easily holding it open. Lulu glared. He almost laughed again because she was so damn cute. Even looking like hungover hell, she was adorable and he wanted to cuddle her.
Yep, cuddle her. Hold her. And then fuck her. Hard.
“Nuh-uh.” He shook that thought away, “It’s Connor this week, remember?”
“Fine. Connor.” She huffed his name like it was a four-letter word, “What are you doing here?”
“Making sure you’re alive.”
“Mission accomplished. Bye now.” She tried to shut the door again but he didn’t budge.
“I brought you some breakfast and coffee. Thought you might need it to help with the hangover.” He shook the bag at her and held the cup up as proof.
“Coffee?” Her dark eyes twinkled just a little as she reached for it.
“Let me in first.” He held it out of reach and she literally growled at him.
“Why?”
“Because I brought you your crack but that’s not the only reason I’m here. I let you sleep as late as I could but we’re gonna be late if you don’t go get dressed now. I’ll sort out the food for you. You get ready.”
“Ready?” For what? What are we late for?”
“Buddy games at the beach. It’s on the invitation, Lu. Everybody is paired up with a buddy to do the sandcastle thing and whatever else Aubrey’s cooked up in her bridezilla head to make us look like assholes.”
“Buddy games.” Lulu winced as she said the words and then cringed, “Oh God, don’t tell me that means…”
“Hi buddy.” He laughed when she groaned.
“I’m going to kill Derek for this.” Lulu all but whimpered as she grabbed the coffee from him and then turned and walked back into her room.
Since the door didn’t slam in his face, Connor followed her inside. Lulu had tipped the large cup back and was guzzling the liquid even as she stumbled around the room. A room that was a disaster area, he noted as he put the bag of food on the dresser. It hadn’t looked like this last night when he’d left her and he frowned.
“I got cold in the middle of the night and had to find pajamas.” Lulu shrugged as if that was explanation enough for why it looked like her suitcase had exploded.
He nodded but remained quiet as he pulled out the items he’d chosen for her for breakfast. He wasn’t about to mention the fact that she’d stripped down to her undies in front of him last night if she wasn’t going to acknowledge she’d gotten cold because she was mostly naked. He laid out the treats and motioned to them casually.
“Take your pick, doll. Sugar. Carbs. Protein. I brought a little of everything because I didn’t know what you’d eat.”
“Wow.” Lulu came closer, admiring the array of breakfast foods, “Where did you get all this?”
“Breakfast buffet.”
“They don’t give take out bags at buffets.” She eyed him suspiciously and he grinned.
“No, they do not. Which is why I stole all of this.”
Lulu giggled, “You stole me breakfast?”
“I need my buddy awake and alert if we’re going to build the best fucking sandcastle that beach has ever seen.”
Lulu smiled and snatched up a blueberry muffin. Connor felt something in his chest ease just a little when she smiled at him like that. She wasn’t fighting with him. Hadn’t thrown him out. That was a good start. It wasn’t much in the grand scheme of things but even one little smile from her felt like he’d won the damn lottery because they were so rare.
“Thanks for the coffee and the food.” Lulu shoved a bite of muffin into her mouth and motioned at the bag, talking with her mouth full and not caring at all that he wanted to lick the crumbs from her lips, “You don’t happen to have any ibuprofen in there do you? My head is killing me and if we’re going to spend the day together I’m going to need a painkiller.”
“Funny.” He rolled his eyes.
“No painkillers then?”
“Not in the bag but there’s some in my suitcase. Hold on. I’ll grab them for you and then we really have to get moving, Lu.” He spoke as he moved to the little door next to the dresser and pulled it open. “We’re going to…”
“What are you doing?” Lulu cut him off, her voice going sharp.
“Going to my room.”
“Our rooms are connected?” Her eyes widened as she peered around him, taking in his side of their little bungalow. “But, you were, at the front and I….”
“I thought I might scare you if I started banging on this side door.” He shrugged as he went into his room to get the little bottle of blue pills. “So I went around but now you know so, there’s no point. Surprise. Our rooms are connected.”
Lulu’s lips pursed as he walked back through the doorway, “That door wasn’t locked. You didn’t just unlock it. And your side was open. Oh my God, did you come into my room last night?”
“Chill out, Lu.” He snorted as he handed her the bottle of pills, “I unlocked your side before I left last night. I was worried about leaving you alone in that condition. I thought if something happened it’d be good to have a fast way to get to you.”
“You could’ve come in here and watched me sleep.”
“But I’m not a creepy fucking stalker so obviously I didn’t.” He frowned, “Come on Lu. You know me better than that. You trusted me to get you to your room last night. Now you don’t even trust me to be next door?”
Her brows knit together but ultimately she finally gave a jerky nod, “Okay, fine, yeah, I know you weren’t being creepy it’s just… I didn’t know you were like, right on the other side of the wall.”
“I told you that was my room last night.”
“Strangely enough everything after my fifth glass of wine gets a little fuzzy.” She opened the pill bottle, shook two into her palm and then downed them with the coffee. “God, I’m tired and I feel like shit and my brain isn’t working properly yet. Just go to the beach without me.”
“Not a chance.” He took her by the shoulders and turned her around, pushing her towards the bathroom, “You’re not getting out of this. Now go in there and do whatever you have to do to make yourself presentable because in fifteen minutes I’m leaving for the beach and you’re going with me, even if I have to carry you.”
“Asshole.” She grumbled.
“That’s one.” He chuckled, “Now go.”
“If I jump in the shower, will you go get me more coffee? There’s not nearly enough in that cup to make me nice.”
He laughed, “Are you going to lock me out if I leave the room?”
> “It hadn’t occurred to me but now that you mention it…”
“Lu.” He groaned and she laughed.
“I won’t lock you out so long as you come back with coffee. Lots and lots of coffee.”
“Your wish is my command.” He mock bowed and she laughed harder.
“Now that is something I could get used to.”
She was still laughing when she slammed the bathroom door in his face and Connor was still grinning.
Good God, had they finally turned the corner?
She hadn’t told him to go away. She’d let him into her room. She’d smiled at him and thanked him for the food and even joked with him. She’d also accused him of being a total stalker and spying on her but hell, he could admit at least to himself that the thought of crossing that line and coming in here to check on her had run through his mind at least one or two dozen times overnight. He hadn’t done it though and he was glad he hadn’t since her reaction had been to freak out at the very thought.
He wasn’t sure what that look on her face had been when she’d realized barely a wall separated them but he’d liked it. Liked the way she’d bit into her bottom lip. Those dark eyes sparking with something that the man in him wanted to call heat but the cynic in him said was probably just confusion.
It didn’t matter. All that mattered right now was that she’d let him in. It was an opening, no matter how small, and he fully intended to slip through whatever crack had opened up in her armor.
He grabbed the donut she’d bypassed and took a big bite as he left the room to retrieve her more coffee. He’d been good and only eaten yogurt and granola for breakfast but hell, he felt like indulging as a treat for how well things with Lulu had gone so far.
Now if they could just make it through the day.
He grinned again as he remembered the way she’d cursed Derek for pairing them as buddies. The truth was, Connor had done more than a little maneuvering on that front to make sure he had her all to himself. He’d put a bug in Derek’s ear about his cousins and that little wager they had going with Dean and of course his friend being the good guy he was hadn’t questioned it at all when Connor suggested he could keep an eye on Lulu this week. Derek had even thanked him for making sure his cousins didn’t get any ideas about sleeping with Lulu. Derek, sweet, oblivious Derek, had no idea that Connor was the one with ideas.