by Jenny Wood
“Cam get ahold of you?” Wade asked me, seeing that I was off the phone now.
“Nah, what’s up?” I asked. Cam was one of his friends that I’d met while joining Wade for dinner during an evening shift. He had a giant group of friends who were kind of all family as well as family in this small town. I didn’t know much about them all, but they’d all seemed nice enough, and I’d gotten to know some a little more than others. For instance, I knew that Conner and his husband Kayson were vacationing in Ireland at the moment and Kingsley and Morgan were having twins, via surrogate. I knew Finn and his partner Jay had a little girl and Joker was quiet but his partner Jase was just as loud and crazy as Kingsley. Cameron was a newer friend to me; I was wary of him at first because I always seemed to get a death stare from his partner Jody and I didn’t want that kind of drama. He was pushy as hell though, so, we’d become closer than the rest of the guys over the last few months. He was good to talk to, and I found myself opening up to him after a nasty argument with Mateo and getting my ass handed to me by my mamá. I’d been pissed and feeling guilty that I had so little patience with Mateo that I snapped at some poor, unsuspecting dude sitting at the bar. He looked scared of me, which was like a kick in the gut, but then he looked something else.
Interested.
“Your body is amazing.” He whispered, trailing his eyes over my naked chest and stomach. I wasn’t a bodybuilder, but I looked alright. I worked out enough to have definition to my body and the black ink I supported on my arms, back, ribs and chest were like an aphrodisiac to most guys. I didn’t have any where my clothes wouldn’t hide, so it was usually a surprise when they were uncovered.
“I like yours too,” I say simply. I did. He was a smidge shorter than me but heavily muscled; fucking veiny and gorgeous. Not my usual type since I was strictly a top, I tended to gravitate towards twinks and distinguishable bottoms. I hoped Murphy was at least verse because it wasn’t debatable with me. I didn’t switch hit; bottoming wasn’t for me. I’d tried it, of course I had, and it may make me selfish, but it just wasn’t for me. The way Murphy seemed to let his guard down and go along with me, had me hoping he’d let me inside. My dick was hard as steel and feeling his eyes on me was only making it worse.
Ripping his pants from his legs and dropping my body onto his, I savor the gasp and groan he couldn’t hide. His fingers clutched me as I took his mouth and rubbed our bodies together, harder as his hips moved into me, needing the friction I was giving us.
“Tell me what you want,” I whisper, nudging his head to the side with my chin and nipping at the flesh of his neck and shoulders.
“I think you’re doin’ alright, don’t you?” He asks breathlessly, eyes closed and lips parted. I grind myself onto him but pull back just slightly to look down at him. His flushed face and wet lips are a distraction, but I need to know before we get any further.
“I just want to make sure we’re on the same page here and fuck; I want you” It was my turn to groan, feeling his hips squeeze me, not wanting to let me up- not that I tried.
“Feels like the same page to me.” He smirked, his hands sliding up my arms to hold on. It was all the confirmation I needed to flip him over and taste him from top to toe.
I shouldn’t have done it. I knew it the second we were finished, and he didn’t get up and leave. That was hook-up courtesy, wasn’t it? You came, you saw, you conquered, and then you left. This guy didn’t do that. We’d seemed to be on the same page when he followed me to my house. Rule number one: never take them to your house, rookie mistake on my part, then they might have a mind to show up without invitation, and that could get awkward. I mean, it hadn’t, but the way I’d handled the next morning, I wasn’t surprised. Again, I was a dick, and it was something I was still feeling guilty about, couldn’t seem to get it out of my brain… The way he lit up for me the second I got my mouth on him was also cemented firmly in the forefront of my brain. I’d not been with someone like him, maybe ever.
“Kingsley and Morgan’s surrogate had the babies. I’m about to head over there to meet em’, you coming?” He asks, already heading for the door.
“Cruz, you’ve gotta call on 2.” Margie, our dispatch slash receptionist slash anything else she wants to be because she’s worked here for half her life, says as I’m following out the door. There’s only one person who’d call me at the station and I’d just gotten off the phone with her; I knew if I took another call from her, I’d be at least twenty minutes more and if I was being honest, I just wasn’t in the mood to deal.
“Can you take a message, Marge. I’ll be back in a couple of hours.” I ask. She waves me off, and I hear her relaying the message as the door closes behind me. I’d call her when I got back.
“I can’t believe Kingsley Kennedy has twins. The man is a giant kid himself.” Wade comments with a smile on our way to the hospital.
“They’ll be good parents though, they’ve been really excited about it,” I tell him honestly. I’d never seen anyone more excited about anything while hearing updates from the guys over dinner. I’d seen sonogram pictures and heard stories about the heartbeat more times than I can count of the last couple months. I’d never have that. I wasn’t the husband and kid type of guy; I didn’t think I could be, not with the family that I had. Mamá tolerates it enough I guess, but I wonder how accepting she’d be if it was in her face all the time, with me having a partner or a baby. It wasn’t something I ever thought about, so it wasn’t like I felt like I was missing out, but I couldn’t help being a little curious when I saw my friends having it and being so happy.
The hospital here in Madison wasn’t much to write home about, but they had their own labor and delivery ward, and we didn’t have a whole lot trauma emergencies. Taking the elevator to the second floor and finding the nurse's station empty, we walked down a small hallway until we found an older lady with the brightest smile, wearing pink scrubs with rubber ducks on them. At the mention of Kingsley and Morgan, she beamed and showed us right to their room herself.
Other than Mateo when I was a kid myself, I hadn’t been around babies much, if any; but seeing the pride on the guys’ faces as they each held one of their babies, I wondered if it would ever be something I’d want.
“You made it!” Morgan greeted us when we walked in. I didn’t hear much beyond that because in the corner of the room with papers surrounding the table he was sitting at; was the man I’d took home and kicked out of my bed about a month earlier. He was no less gorgeous now than he was then. Frantically packing his papers away, he avoided looking at anyone but spoke with urgency as he made his excuse to leave, no doubt because of me.
“I’m going to let you guys visit and be on my way. I’ll call you tomorrow, see about finishing this, sound good?” He explains, still not looking at anyone, as Wade accepts the baby that Morgan hands him. He’s packed away and up and out the door before anyone can stop him. “Call me if you need anything.” He says before the door shuts. Before I can even think of going after him, Kingsley is handing me an explosion of pink and white, beauty.
I remember Teo this little, he cried a lot, so I didn’t get to hold him all that much, but I watched as mamá paced the floor and tried to sing and comfort him. He had colic; which I’m not 100% sure what it is, but I do know it meant that he cried incessantly.
“Wonder what that was about?” Morgan looked worriedly over at Kingsley who didn’t seem to have noticed the way his adoption specialist’s heels were on fire.
“What?” Kingsley asks.
“Uhm, did you not notice Murphy all but running out of here?” Morgan asked, seriously.
“No, maybe he’s late for something or maybe he had to shit. He seemed fine to me.” Kingsley shrugged. I was content to keep my mouth shut. Stupidly, I looked to Morgan and whatever he saw on my face had him scrunching his up in confusion. I hoped he’d let it go because I wasn’t about to admit my acting like an asshole and possibly embarrassing or hurting his friends’ feelings.
>
Thankfully, he let it go, and I sat in the rocking chair beside the bed and rocked this gorgeous little girl while she slept, while Wade and the guys talked babies. Before Kingsley had handed her to me, I wouldn’t have pegged myself as a baby person; I wasn’t sure I even knew how to hold one; she was light as air though, and didn’t move a muscle.
I rocked in the chair and tried not to think of that night all those weeks ago.
I slammed my dick into him over and over again making him scream out in pleasured pain. I’d licked him all over, ate at him until he was open for me, then I fucked him hard and fast. I held his hands above his head in a punishing grip as he backed up into me, needing more.
“So good.” He slurred. I was out of control, he’d already finished but begged me not to stop. I couldn’t if I wanted to, he felt too good. Keeping his cheek to the mattress and having me plastered against his back, he wasn’t able to move, and he seemed more than okay with that.
“You’re gonna make me come.” I panted, baring my teeth and nipping his back. His body jerked, and he groaned, his ass squeezing me tighter than I could handle. It was like he pulled it out of me, my orgasm hit without warning, and my thrusts faltered until I planted myself deep inside him and let go. Resting my head on the back of his neck, I barely felt his fingers stroking my arm that was framing his body over his head. It felt nice.
Once I caught my breath and rolled off of him, I didn’t say anything as I trekked to the bathroom to get rid of the condom and clean up. It sucked that this was a one-off because he was somethin’ else. He could carry on a conversation, and he seemed like a genuinely nice guy. He helped little kids for fuck sake, of course, he was a good guy. But I wasn’t looking for a relationship judging by the fact that he’d come home with a random guy from a bar he’d known for an hour, made me think he wasn’t either.
I expected him to be up and halfway dressed by the time I got back to the bedroom, but I found him exactly where I’d left him, breathing deep and quiet with his eyes closed. He was asleep, that was against one-night stand protocol. I didn’t know what to do. Going to my dresser for sleep pants that I pulled on, I wasn’t quiet when I made my way over to the bed to slide in. I jostled the bed more than necessary, thinking if he woke up he’d remember what this was and head on home. I didn’t want this being awkward. You’d think I’d never had a one-off before, but it had been quite a while and never in the same town that I lived. Granted, I didn’t think I’d ever crossed his path before, but fuck did I know, maybe he was new.
Ahem…. I cleared my throat like a jackass, and it startled him awake. His greener than green eyes shined happily at me, and his face went soft when he saw me. I panicked, I couldn’t help it, but my body froze. When he leaned in to kiss me, it decided to snap into it, and I opened my mouth and fucked up.
“It’s gettin’ late; I think we should call it a night, don’t you?” I tried for nonchalance, but the way his body froze and his head jerked back, I knew it didn’t come out that way. I hated the pink that tinged his cheeks because I knew that he was embarrassed and that wasn’t my intention; even if he did look fucking adorable with a flushed face. I wanted to take it back and tell him to lay back down, that I’d spend the rest of his birthday in bed with him. Then I felt like an even bigger asshole when I remembered that it was his birthday and I was essentially kicking him out of my bed and my home. Maybe I should ask for his number or something, but I didn’t want to give him any idea’s. While I was thinking of something to say to maybe smooth my diarrhea of the mouth and piss-poor timing, I heard the door snick shut, with him on the other side of it. It snapped my attention, and I jumped from the bed, but by the time I made it to the door, I heard my front door closing as well.
Fuck.
Murphy
I stared at the papers strewn across my coffee table, not even seeing the words on each form that I needed to focus on. Humiliated, that’s what I’d been the night of my birthday when I’d gone home with a random hot guy from a restaurant. I never did things like that, not ever, but I was alone, and it was my birthday, and for once I wanted to let go of everything and just do something, be with someone. Bad idea.
“It’s gettin’ late; I think we should call it a night, don’t you?” His intent was clear, but even if it wasn’t and I’d misunderstood; getting dressed while he sat, unmoving on his bed while I did it was clear enough. While it was true that I hadn’t had the best first impression of him, seeing as he was snappy and rude at the bar; we’d actually gotten along quite well during dinner, and for some reason, I’d forgotten all about the first ten minutes of our meeting. I shouldn’t have.
While it’s true that Cruz had been my first one night stand, I didn’t think it was supposed to be treated like a bathroom hookup at a skeevy club or something- well, unless it actually was in the bathroom of a skeevy club or something. It also sucked that I didn’t know anyone here well enough to talk to about stuff like that, because I could’ve gone for some advice or at least a good pep talk afterward. I didn’t consider myself overly clingy, though I could be if I let myself; I was the type of person to want more, usually.
I mean, it wasn’t like I’d wanted to spend the night curled up in his arms or anything, though I would’ve- I wouldn’t have without an invitation, and I wasn’t under any illusion, I knew it wasn’t a match made in heaven; but I didn’t see what it would’ve hurt to enjoy each other a little more before I’d gone home. It’d been a long time since I’d been comfortable enough with someone to let my guard down like that, it’d been even longer since I’d had sex. My last relationship ended about as badly as that night did.
“You’re hot, but you’re too much work.” My boyfriend of eleven months said to me just before he left my apartment in Savannah. We were in a committed relationship, so I don’t think I was in the wrong for wanting to spend nights with him on the weekend or ask who he was with when he’d call me late at night from the club, wanting to come over. He got frustrated with my insecurities and my constant need to be with him- his words, not mine. I didn’t think a few nights a week together were too much, not when you were dating someone, and I liked to touch base with him throughout the day, let him know I was thinking about him when I was. Those were nice things to do, weren’t they? I’d like to be told when I cross someone’s mind; I wouldn’t consider it intrusive or over the line if my boyfriend wanted to check in and see what I was up to. It’s wasn’t like I ever called him out on the guys he’d hang out with at the club or tried to stop him from doing the things that he liked; though I did ask if I could come with him sometimes, but again that was just because I wanted to spend time with him and do the things that he liked to do. He didn’t see it that way.
Looking back, it was easy to see that he was with me because I was convenient, because he didn’t much bother with me when I wasn’t. I didn’t understand relationships like that; I wasn’t made that way. I didn’t want to be somebody’s “sometimes,” I wanted to matter. I wanted to be a priority, probably because I’d never been one.
Anyway, it was over now. Lesson learned I guess, which kind of sucks because while I’d always told myself that I didn’t have a type, it would seem that I did. I’d done nothing but think about Cruz, even though I thought his name was Michael, for the last month. Only slightly taller than me, it wasn’t often that someone would look at me and see “bottom”; but I was, strictly. Stereotypes, especially when getting to know people, were impossible. I’d seen people look right through me because they assumed that by my body type or my looks meant that I wouldn’t be what they were looking for, but maybe I was. I loved being pressed to the bed, a big body over me, in me, and just closing my eyes and giving up my control. When Cruz held my wrists to the bed, and I had no hope of moving them, it made me harder than I was when his mouth was on me. Feeling his body press me into the mattress had me coming without him ever even touching my dick. I needed it, and he gave it to me, so good.
My phone ringing jolted me from my
musings, and I noticed Donetta’s number on my display.
“Hey, what’s up?” I answer, thankful for the distraction.
“Hey darlin’, do you remember the Stevens’? Adopted 4-year old Julian McAvoy a couple of years back? He was special needs; I believe he didn’t speak.” She asks getting right to the point of her call. That was Donetta; she wasn’t one for small talk.
“I do, he was deaf actually. Didn’t learn to speak while in the system. Didn’t even learn sign until he went to the Stevens’. Very sad. Why do you ask?”
“That makes sense then, the Steven’s are fostering a girl with the same impairment, looks like for the past thirteen months and they want to adopt. Their lawyer is going to fax everything over their files and background checks and all that in the morning, I just wanted to give you a heads up.” She tells me. I’m not surprised by this information, the Stevens, if I remember correctly weren’t able to have children but were the type of people who deserved houseful; and Donetta always kept me in the loop, even after business hours because she forwarded her calls from the office to her cell.
“That’s awesome!” I say excitedly. “I’ll be sure to take some time to look it over in the morning so we can get the ball rolling with them. Can you schedule a meeting with them early next week?” I ask knowing she’ll have no problem doing that. I was right, she agrees and promptly ends the call. Like I said, no small talk with Donetta. Thankfully, it was just the distraction I needed to stop thinking about the deputy and his form-fitting black, short-sleeved sheriff shirt and very well-worn jeans, and got back to work.
“Morning” I mumbled when I walked into the office the next morning. I hadn’t slept worth a shit, and I knew why. Those steely grey eyes that looked at me with such heat, it was a wonder I didn’t burn up on the spot, was filtering through my head on a constant loop. I was driving myself crazy wondering if he remembered me yesterday or if I’d made another awkward impression. If he had remembered me, I wondered if he’d have spoken to me or if he’d have pretended he’d never seen me before. I wondered if he was out amongst his friends or if he was dating the other guy he came in with. These thoughts were on constant rotation in my head, and I knew I was obsessing like a school-girl, but I couldn’t help it. As cliché as it was, I’d never been with anyone who made me feel the way that he did when he’d touched me; and not just because he owned my body for the short time that I’d let him, but because for about an hour on my birthday, he’d made me forget how alone I felt all the time. The sex was phenomenal, but it was more than that, at least it had been for me.