by Jenny Wood
“Calm down.” I try.
“What’s going on?” Mamá joins our little huddle and asks.
“Nothing, Mamá; Teo and I were just going outside to get some air,” I tell her, trying to avoid a scene. Teo scoffs loudly, and mamá looks to him for answers.
“Nothing but trouble…” someone mumbled, and I could practically see Teo’s face getting hotter.
“You!” Teo pointed to the man I thought was Uncle Miguel. “Who are you?” He demanded an answer.
“I am Jose’s cousin Rio.” He answered, looking his nose down at both Teo and me.
“Well, Rio…. Keep your mouth shut in mi madré house. You’ll have respect for me and my brother. That goes for all of you! Tia Gloria, if I hear one more word about mi hermano, our of your hateful fucking mouth, you’ll find yourself on the front stoop, sleeping in the cold.” Teo rants at his family, his family that because of Jose, never even attempted to accept me. We only saw them at holiday’s and special occasions so it never really bothered me, but their hateful words and remarks were taking their toll at the moment; on Mateo too, apparently.
“Teo, calm down.” Mamá tried to console him.
“No, Mamá.” He shook off her hold. “You’ve let these people treat Michael terribly for years, if you don’t put a stop to it, I’m going to.” He glared at her, and I saw her eyes fill up with tears. This is what I wanted to avoid.
“Teo, Mamá,” I say softly, gaining both of their attention. “I’m going to go on back to the hotel for the night. This isn’t doing anyone any good, and it’s stressful enough around here without everyone bickering.”
“The hotel?” Teo was back to yelling, “Mano, this is your house too! You should be staying here, not at a hotel! Mamá, I love you but get your head out of your ass. Michael is your son!” He barked.
“Language, mano. She is your mother.” I scolded softly.
“Why should I respect her when she does not respect you?” He fired back. I had to admit that he had me there. I didn’t know how to answer.
“Teo, go make some tea, let me talk to mi hijo.” Mamá said firmly. He huffed out a breath and stalked away, glaring at everyone who dared to look at him. Mamá opened the back door, and I followed her to the back porch. She closed the door shut firmly behind her and took a seat on the porch swing; then motioned for me to sit with her. I did.
“I’m proud of you.” She says, for the first time in my life. “You’ve become a good man. A good brother and a good son. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you that more often.”
“It’s fine; we don’t need to do this.”
“It’s not fine.” She cut me off, wringing her hands in her dirty apron. “I do not pretend to understand your….way of life, mijo. I do not know why a man would choose to be with another man; but, I do not condemn you for it, that is not my job. My job as a mother is to love you regardless of what path you choose in this life and be there for you throughout the journey. I have failed you, mijo and for that I am sorry.” There was a lot there; I didn’t know how to process; so I said nothing.
“Jose was a stubborn, complicated man and I know he never treated you fairly. I should’ve put a stop to that. I’m sorry I didn’t. I’m sorry he made you go, but Michael, you were leaving anyway, it was only a matter of time. And Teo is right; this is your home too; you’ll always have a place here. You don’t need to go back to the hotel. I can make these people leave.” She offers, though I decline. I wouldn’t feel comfortable staying here; it hasn’t been home in a long time.
“That’s okay; they’re helping you. You need to be with family; I’m good at the hotel.” I tell her honestly. I know Jose’s family are tough to deal with, but for my mother, they’d mean well. It was only me they had a problem with.
“You’re my family too.” She cried quietly.
“And I always will be, but this isn’t my home.” I shrugged, trying not to sound too harsh. “I love you, though. That’ll never change.”
“Te amo, Michael.” She patted my cheek and went back inside. I sat on the back porch for a long time. It was peaceful out here, and I needed the quiet. I thought about jumping in my truck and making a break for home. I didn’t, I pulled out my phone and shot Murphy a text. I’d need to call him soon.
Me: I miss you.
I slid my phone back in my pocket and went back inside.
“I’m headed back to the hotel, you staying with Mamá, tonight?” I ask Mateo, I had already said goodbye to Mamá and told her I’d be back tomorrow for the wake. I wasn’t looking forward to that, the entirety of Jose’s family would be here for a traditional Catholic wake. It was going to be hell.
“Hell no, I’m coming with you.” He says, walking with me down the walk to the truck. Neither of us spoke on the way to the hotel, it was late, and I just wanted to drop into bed and forget the day.
“Thank you, Teo, for having my back, today,” I tell him as we hit the elevator up to our floor.
“I’m sorry it took me this long, mano. Those people were awful today. Do you deal with that shit all the time?” He asks, looking horrified that he’d only just thought of it.
“Nah, not really. Not at home, anyway. You know the guys, people are pretty used to us by now.” I smirked, thinking of anyone saying a cross word to Kingsley or Jody, or any of them really.
“Good. It isn’t wrong, Michael. I don’t believe it is.” He tells me, sincerely and it means everything to hear that from my brother.
“Thank you,” I say, pushing him to the side in affection. He scoffs as I get out my key card and let us into our room. I stop dead in my tracks as I see a giant lump in the middle of my bed, covered to his neck with my blanket. I scan the room and notice a pizza box, a couple of bottled waters and a bag on the floor by the couch. Murphy came back.
“Looks like your boy didn’t like being away from you, mano.” Teo laughed quietly and shoved me into the room. Quickly stepping out of my shoes, tearing off my shirt and sliding out of my jeans. I heard Mateo pulling out the couch bed, but I was already wrapped firmly around Murphy; arms around his body and legs pinning him down. This was what I needed, this was the only thing I needed, and he knew that and came back.
I was falling in love with Murphy Kinzer…
Murphy
The funeral was the longest funeral in the history of funerals.
I had never gone to a Catholic funeral, and I prayed I’d never have to go to another one. People spoke of Jose, and he didn’t seem like a terrible person. Of course, I knew better. I’d tried to sit it out, coming to the funeral and I really wish I’d fought harder, but Teo and Cruz made certain to be my bodyguards and begged me to be with them today. So, I relented and sat between them the entire service. I didn’t go anywhere without one of them, and nobody dared say a word to any of us; though we did get some pretty glacial looks.
I got to formally meet Luna De Marco, who was Teo and Cruz’s mother. She had seemed embarrassed and not all the way comfortable with me, but I tried my hardest to smooth the way with her. I knew she didn’t understand my relationship with her son, but for his sake, she was trying. I could respect that.
When I woke up the other night, in a hotel bed in Holton, pinned to the mattress with Cruz’s big body pressing into mine; I felt home. It was amazing how a few days and a tragedy helped you gain perspective.
“I missed you, too.” I’d whispered to him, kissing his arm that was wrapped around me and fell right back to sleep.
The next morning, we all took a much-needed trip to the mall and spent the day shopping and just being away from the house. We hung out at the food court, and Mateo and Cruz ducked into an arcade and played a few games while I took a call from Donetta, but other than that, it was a pretty relaxing day, considering. When the guys went back to their mothers for a couple of hours, I took a nap and read a book. It was like a mini-vacation away for me, and I can’t say I minded it; though I wish it would’ve been under better circumstances, but still…the company was the
best part.
The next couple days went pretty much the same, and here we were, finally finished with the funeral. Everyone was supposed to meet back at Luna’s house for dinner, but the guys and me had decided to clear out the hotel room and head back home.
“Are you sure you do not want to stay?” Luna asks Teo for the second time in as many minutes.
“I’m sure. I need to get back to my community service and the guys.” He says. “I’ll call and be back, maybe on weekends to see you.” He promised.
“Alright. Go be grown.” She smiled, patting his face and he kissed her cheek and left us alone.
“Mamá.” Cruz said quietly, and she turned to him.
“You, my son had better not stay gone for so long. Your mother misses you.” She winked and patted his face like she had Mateo.
“And you, Murphy Kinzer; thank you for being here for my boys. They are not the same without you. I have seen this with my own eyes.” She says, smiling a small but sincere smile. “You make my son Michael, very happy. Thank you for that.”
“Thank you,” I say back; it was high praise coming from her, for sure.
“You are welcome to my home, anytime.” She says, patting my face and winking at me. She looked so much like her son then, I couldn’t help but smile.
“Drive safe and call me tonight.” She looked pointedly at Cruz, and he promised to do that. They hugged for a long minute before Cruz backed away, grabbed my hand and walked with me to the truck.
“I’m ready to be home.” Cruz pulls me to him, wrapping his arm around my shoulders and leaned his mouth to my ear; “You want to stay with me tonight?” He asked with a nip to my ear.
“Okay,” I breathed, a shudder going through my body at the sting.
“Maybe tomorrow night, too?” He offered, licking his way up my neck, growling in response to my gasp.
“Alright.” I agreed, willing to do just about anything at the promise of him.
“Maybe I’ll just keep you, huh, boyfriend?” He said sexily, stopping beside the truck not opening the door, yet crowding my space. Teo was in the backseat; I could see him with his face in his phone.
“Yeah, okay.” I agreed breathily, not knowing what he meant but, more than ready to submit.
“This is it, you and me. Boyfriends, partners, whatever you wanna call it, alright? We’re no longer trying it out anymore, it just is.” Cruz says softly, eyes intently on mine.
“Tell me you understand that so we can go home.” He prompts.
“I understand that.”
“Get it, baby. It’s important.” He clarifies.
“I get it,” I answer.
“Good. Let’s go home.” He drops a kiss on my lips and opens my door. We were going home.
Cruz
“Teo! Get off the phone and join your party!” I yell at my brother who was locked in his room, on the phone with his girlfriend, Tana. Tana joined a kickboxing class at Gannon’s gym and my baby brother was smitten. They talked from sun up to sun down, and I didn’t even want to know what they got up to at the gym.
“Leave the boy alone, Cruz, he’s trying to get him some.” Kayson joked, unfunnily.
“We can cut the cake without him, can’t we?” Kingsley teased but was looking mighty hopeful.
“They’re inseparable at the gym; it’s kind of sickening.” Shade chimed in, scanning the room for Gannon, who’d just went outside with a man I didn’t know but was friends with Teo from the gym.
Teo had finished his community service, was done with his check-ins and back on the honor roll in school. Things were hard for him the last couple months since losing his father, but I suppose with everything in life, time had a way of healing the hurt. Time and Murphy, that was…
Murphy was the light where I was dark. He was the calm while I was the crazy. He was patient where I sometimes flew off the handle, and he was endlessly polite while I could still be a dick. We complimented each other well, and if I was being honest, he was the better half of me. I couldn’t believe I’d gotten so lucky, and I wasn’t about to let him go. He was stuck. I was making sure of it.
“Hey,” the man in question sidled up to me and wrapped his arm around my waist, dropping something into my pocket. “I didn’t miss the cake.” He smiled, angling his head up for a kiss. I didn’t hesitate.
“Stop making out and go get the kid. We want cake!” Kingsley grouched, now holding a wiggly Wyatt.
“Go pound his door down; I give you permission.” I goaded him and fuck me if he didn’t look seconds away from considering it.
“Did you pull it out of the garage?” I asked, earning an eager nod. Today was Teo’s seventeenth birthday, and Mamá and I had gotten him a car. I figured now that he had a girlfriend and was working his way up to something at the gym with Gannon, the man needed his own wheels; so, Murphy pulled it out of the garage and covered it with a giant bow, and we were all just waiting on Teo to get off the phone with his lady, so we could cut the cake and give it to him.
“I’m here, keep your pants on.” Teo beamed, walking down the hallway. Mama couldn’t make it today because she’d taken a much-needed vacation and went on a cruise with Jose’s sister Gloria. Those two were pretty inseparable, and although Gloria never made the trip to visit with mama, my mother had been here several times, and always included Murphy. She was trying really hard, and it was paying off; we almost felt like a real, normal family at times.
“Sing to me peasants and then shower me with gifts,” Teo said haughtily, and everyone started throwing napkins and streamers at him, shoving him around good-naturedly. He laughed as we all sang happy birthday and the second I handed him the keys to his new car, he was out of there. He thanked me, of course, but he wanted to go see his babe. I couldn’t blame him; I was seconds away from kicking the guys out of here so I could spend some alone time with my own.
Teo was on his way home, he’d texted and said he’d be home by curfew and the rest of our house guests stayed until dark, then the rest of them gathered their families and hit the road. We all made plans to meet up for Conner’s birthday in two weeks at his and Kayson’s house, but other than that, we’d still see them here and there throughout the week. It seemed like one of them was always around. It was good to have such good people in our lives, and I was happy Murphy and Teo had them too.
“Leave the dishes; they’ll get done tomorrow,” I tell Murphy, coming up behind him and tucking my face into neck. I loved the feel of him, the smell of him. He smelled like home.
“No, then the water will be all cold and gross. Slimy morning water. Yuck.” He complained, washing each dish by hand instead of using the dishwasher.
“Baby, leave them. I wanna show you something.” I tried a different tactic, rubbing myself against him, in enticement.
“Is it your penis? Because I’ve seen it before.” He deadpanned, and I couldn’t stop my surprised laugh.
“Not impressed, eh?” I asked, turning him around in my arms to see his eyes shining bright with humor.
“Oh, it’s impressive, alright.” He replies, throwing his arms around my neck and hanging on. “Can I tell you something?” He asks, studying my face, for what I don’t know.
“Course.”
“You and Teo, you guys mean a lot to me. Ya know?” He asks. I did know that he meant everything to us too. I nodded in acknowledgment.
“So, I was wondering if, you know soon or whatever, if you guys would want to move in with me?” He asks softly. I couldn’t hide my smile.
“No,” I laugh, watching his face fall for a second, “You’re never at your house, you’re always here. Why would we move in to your house when your house is here with us?”
“Huh?” He jerks his head back and looks at me hopefully.
“Baby, I haven’t let you leave in months. Your home is here, with Teo and me. You’re moved in already.” I tell him honestly. Not the best way to ask him to move in, but if the result is him being moved in, then what do I care?
“Do you? Because you just asked us to move in with you.” I point out, laughing at his bewildered look.
“You want to live together?” He asks softly.
“We’re already living together.” I tease him, being purposefully obnoxious.
“Michael.” He says my first name, so I get serious.
“I love you,” I tell him, simply.
“Ya do?” He squeaks, body jolting in my arms.
“Yeah. You love me?” I ask, knowing he does but wondering if he’ll admit it. I can tell in everything he does. He shows us every single day. He has shown us every single day since he ended up in our hotel room in Holton.
“Yeah, I do. I love both of you.” He tells me. I wasn’t expecting the feeling I got when he said that, but it choked me up a little bit if I was honest.
“Ya do?” I ask, stealing his words with a smile.
“Yeah, I do. So much.” He leans into me, touching his lips to mine.
“Good. Then welcome home.” I say softly against his lips, watching his eyes close as he takes a deep, calming breath.
“Thank you.” He whispers back and kisses me one last time. “Now let me get back to these dishes, so I don’t wake up to slimy morning water.” I throw my head back and laugh, just as Teo walks in.
“I’m home.” He declares unnecessarily.
“Yeah, ya are. We all are.” I wink at him and squeeze Murphy in my arms. We all were home, and that’s where we were staying.
The End
(for now)
© Jenny Wood 11-20-17
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